My answer is a combination of Shadie and Buffra's. I either get testy and sarcastic (to the point of caustic) or I get very logical and explain-y (i.e., defensive). Outright yelling and such scares the bejezus out of me, but fortunately my family doesn't do much of that. We're more the freeze-out types.
Well. I'm a combo of the three of you (which is very fresh in my mind just now) seasoned with my pre-tear maneuver - leaving. My strongest tendency in a fight after the sarcasm and the chill is to grab my keys and go.
I am a Hindenburg myself - the number of times I have actually exploded could be counted on my hands.
I grew up in a environment which was negatively charged with constant vicious argument and fighting, peppered with physical punishment, and this has made me completely avoidant of confrontation. Usually if something makes me angry, I will say nothing about it at all until I am at home with W/P and can express it safely.
But, there are times when I have been pushed too far and gone completely apeshit. Trouble is, when that happens, I really take no prisoners, because all my early learning taught me to fight dirty. People who trigger me like that are often totally dismayed and upset by it, as they cannot believe I am capable of it. I'm like an atomic bomb inside a fluffy kitten, LOL!
if something makes me angry, I will say nothing about it at all until I am at home with W/P and can express it safely
I'm like that, too. Even now, there are times I call J to vent about something, because I can't get angry with whoever pissed me off. He tends to do that, too, so I guess it's okay if I do it...
Interesting question. I'm a combination of several, I think. I start giving rational arguments but, as frustration grows my voice goes up. I can be really eloquent when I'm angry... but I can also shout and hurt whoever I'm talking to. With the ex, at the end, frustration made me end in tears and oh boy, did I try to control them! I can't stay angry for too long, though. Once I've shouted/cried, everything is well again within a short period.
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I grew up in a environment which was negatively charged with constant vicious argument and fighting, peppered with physical punishment, and this has made me completely avoidant of confrontation. Usually if something makes me angry, I will say nothing about it at all until I am at home with W/P and can express it safely.
But, there are times when I have been pushed too far and gone completely apeshit. Trouble is, when that happens, I really take no prisoners, because all my early learning taught me to fight dirty. People who trigger me like that are often totally dismayed and upset by it, as they cannot believe I am capable of it. I'm like an atomic bomb inside a fluffy kitten, LOL!
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I'm like that, too. Even now, there are times I call J to vent about something, because I can't get angry with whoever pissed me off. He tends to do that, too, so I guess it's okay if I do it...
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I start giving rational arguments but, as frustration grows my voice goes up. I can be really eloquent when I'm angry... but I can also shout and hurt whoever I'm talking to.
With the ex, at the end, frustration made me end in tears and oh boy, did I try to control them!
I can't stay angry for too long, though. Once I've shouted/cried, everything is well again within a short period.
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