Picwar 21: It's not pretty. It's shiny; it's sparkly; but it's not pretty. War isn't you know.
WE HAVE CROSSED THE POINT OF NO RETURN: Picwar 21
Need to catch up on the picwar so far?
So in the last installment, Locky got serious:
My take on this was that it looks like a My Little Pony fell into a vat of craft glue and then molested a farm of ostriches and peacocks and then rolled in glitter to remove the bird smell
So of course, one good turn deserves another.
Honestly, this costume is so terrible, and so obviously terrible, that I'm not sure any prose can do it justice. Which doesn't mean I'm going to let it speak to itself.
So . . . if you catch it from the right angle, it doesn't look that bad.
See? Your eyes hardly felt the need to bleed at all. Let's not mention how I'm showing approximately 5% of the costume. And at the most flattering angle possible.
OK, let's really do it.
*deep breath*
OK . . . light green and gold lamé with green sequin insets and gold diamond lamé detailing is bad enough . . . but this costume needed a little some thing extra . . . like a ginormous rainbow-sherbet-inspired foofy boa thing . . . that seriously looks like a boa constrictor ate a My Little Pony factory and then exploded all over the ugliest prom dress seen this side of 1986.
Also, the cascading ruffles of pastel awesomeness at the bottoms of the boas add a certain je ne sais quoi . . .
This is a costume that, no matter how many times I see it, I just can't get to a place where I can rationalize its horribleness away.
Random detail shots:
Sure, Aiba still looks pretty. But that's because he transcends the costume by being really flaily and happy throughout this perfomance. It's irresistible.
Despite this, however, I think it incumbent upon me to point out another point in this costume: its creative understanding of sleeves. See, Aiba's costume only has one long sleeve and one sleeveless side, but apparently, no one took this into consideration when they decided to layer the costume over a short-sleeved shirt . . . well done, I say.
By the way, this is the pony his constrictor ate. I understand its name was Mimic. RIP Mimic.
Ohno also somehow . . . doesn't look quite as ridiculous in his outfit as he clearly should . . . I think it's because he generally looks really happy here and keeps flashing his trademark peace sign at everyone and we're too busy being charmed and dazzled to wtf at him for actually wearing this monstrosity.
Incidentally, Ohno also gets the one-sleeve treatment.
Oh, his boa ate someone called Moonstone.
By clever positioning of his solo just before this set, Nino cannily manages to miss several minutes of this set. He celebrates.
So, did JE just have some sort of weird sleeve issue? Or are they trying to titillate us with glimpses of the costume under this one, assuring us that this costume is after all, only temporary?
Also, I think the message behind him is trying to tell them all something. Something like Take off those costumes; they're terrible.
(RIP Skydancer)
I really really want to tell Sho that there is just no way in the world he's going to pull off either badass or thuggish with that hat when he's wearing that costume.
I'm not even going to mention that his hat is white and pink and says "Show" on it (I've heard it says "Show Time" on it, but only can see the "Show" part of it . . . but my point still stands.) It's adorable and ridiculous, but it doesn't really say 'hardcore rapper' to me at all ^^" Sorry, Sho.
But at least he has a symmetrical lack of sleeves . . . of any kind.
Oh, by the way, RIP Parasol.
I would like to put Jun's cuff on the list of inappropriate, yet awesome, accessories featured with this costume.
Again, it's impossible to look all that badass when you're covered in 897 yards of fluffy tulle. But go ahead and try. Though that wrist action is not helping you, Matsumoto.
. . . yeah . . .
and the last pony fashion victim is Windy . . .
OK, so what the hell was up with the ponies . . . Sorry. They were my first collecting obsession . . . you know, the first time they came out. But there was actually kind of sort of a point . . .because one of the kind of hilarious details about the foofy boas is that they're actually color coded for each member . . . look closely . . .
Yup. Each boy's boa is slightly weighted toward their color. Since red is way too masculine for this costume, Sho has to settle for pink, Nino's has an abundance of yellow, Aiba's a very pale green, Ohno's blue and Jun's a very nice lavender.
Yet again, I am highly amused at the thought and consideration that goes into these costumes while aesthetic considerations just don't operate.
On a side note, the Boy and I irresponsibly made up an Arashi concert drinking game a couple of weeks ago. The rules are as follows:
The following occurrences merit a drink:
Inappropriate Boy-touching
Arashi member falling or laying on the ground
Ohno peace sign
Nino floppy hands
Aiba kicky thing (when not part of the choreography)
Sho!fail (as determined and negotiated at the time)
Jun camera whoring, as well as crowd exhorting
Shush. It was the only way I could get the Boy to watch concerts with me. We're not really big drinkers, so let's just say tiny sips ^^"
I bring this up, because when I capped this performance, I realized that when we should probably make our wills out before we get to the Time concert, because good lord *__*
Oh, I forgot that Jun gratuitous tongue action was on the list, too.
I wasn't joking about Ohno and his peace signs. I think what really happened in this performance is that his fingers cramped up and he couldn't help but make the "V" sign . . .
No, really.
The Boy and I like to argue about what specifically counts as Sho!fail.
Ohno, are you trying to kill me?
*weeps*
Seriously, I stopped capping each occurrence after a while, because it hurt too much to even think about it. While Aiba and Ohno were the main offenders, everyone certainly contributed.
A little cute Aiba/Jun just because:
Anyway, this is a truly awesome spectacle of sartorial hubris, I think. The best things I can say about this costume are a) that they only wear it for 10 minutes and b) it snaps down the center and is easy to remove.
It says something about these costumes that the white and pink shirts with shiny pink camo pants they were wearing under this outfit are such a vast improvement.
*hugs for my flist*
I hope you all are doing well&hearts I'm a little swamped, so I'm glad I managed to get this done. I'll probably be a little buried under work for a while, so I'm sorry if I don't get around to commenting in a timely manner ^^" I am also breathlessly awaiting the new concert dvd for more picwar fodder ^_^
/babble
*waves*
Need to catch up on the picwar so far?
So in the last installment, Locky got serious:
My take on this was that it looks like a My Little Pony fell into a vat of craft glue and then molested a farm of ostriches and peacocks and then rolled in glitter to remove the bird smell
So of course, one good turn deserves another.
Honestly, this costume is so terrible, and so obviously terrible, that I'm not sure any prose can do it justice. Which doesn't mean I'm going to let it speak to itself.
So . . . if you catch it from the right angle, it doesn't look that bad.
See? Your eyes hardly felt the need to bleed at all. Let's not mention how I'm showing approximately 5% of the costume. And at the most flattering angle possible.
OK, let's really do it.
*deep breath*
OK . . . light green and gold lamé with green sequin insets and gold diamond lamé detailing is bad enough . . . but this costume needed a little some thing extra . . . like a ginormous rainbow-sherbet-inspired foofy boa thing . . . that seriously looks like a boa constrictor ate a My Little Pony factory and then exploded all over the ugliest prom dress seen this side of 1986.
Also, the cascading ruffles of pastel awesomeness at the bottoms of the boas add a certain je ne sais quoi . . .
This is a costume that, no matter how many times I see it, I just can't get to a place where I can rationalize its horribleness away.
Random detail shots:
Sure, Aiba still looks pretty. But that's because he transcends the costume by being really flaily and happy throughout this perfomance. It's irresistible.
Despite this, however, I think it incumbent upon me to point out another point in this costume: its creative understanding of sleeves. See, Aiba's costume only has one long sleeve and one sleeveless side, but apparently, no one took this into consideration when they decided to layer the costume over a short-sleeved shirt . . . well done, I say.
By the way, this is the pony his constrictor ate. I understand its name was Mimic. RIP Mimic.
Ohno also somehow . . . doesn't look quite as ridiculous in his outfit as he clearly should . . . I think it's because he generally looks really happy here and keeps flashing his trademark peace sign at everyone and we're too busy being charmed and dazzled to wtf at him for actually wearing this monstrosity.
Incidentally, Ohno also gets the one-sleeve treatment.
Oh, his boa ate someone called Moonstone.
By clever positioning of his solo just before this set, Nino cannily manages to miss several minutes of this set. He celebrates.
So, did JE just have some sort of weird sleeve issue? Or are they trying to titillate us with glimpses of the costume under this one, assuring us that this costume is after all, only temporary?
Also, I think the message behind him is trying to tell them all something. Something like Take off those costumes; they're terrible.
(RIP Skydancer)
I really really want to tell Sho that there is just no way in the world he's going to pull off either badass or thuggish with that hat when he's wearing that costume.
I'm not even going to mention that his hat is white and pink and says "Show" on it (I've heard it says "Show Time" on it, but only can see the "Show" part of it . . . but my point still stands.) It's adorable and ridiculous, but it doesn't really say 'hardcore rapper' to me at all ^^" Sorry, Sho.
But at least he has a symmetrical lack of sleeves . . . of any kind.
Oh, by the way, RIP Parasol.
I would like to put Jun's cuff on the list of inappropriate, yet awesome, accessories featured with this costume.
Again, it's impossible to look all that badass when you're covered in 897 yards of fluffy tulle. But go ahead and try. Though that wrist action is not helping you, Matsumoto.
. . . yeah . . .
and the last pony fashion victim is Windy . . .
OK, so what the hell was up with the ponies . . . Sorry. They were my first collecting obsession . . . you know, the first time they came out. But there was actually kind of sort of a point . . .because one of the kind of hilarious details about the foofy boas is that they're actually color coded for each member . . . look closely . . .
Yup. Each boy's boa is slightly weighted toward their color. Since red is way too masculine for this costume, Sho has to settle for pink, Nino's has an abundance of yellow, Aiba's a very pale green, Ohno's blue and Jun's a very nice lavender.
Yet again, I am highly amused at the thought and consideration that goes into these costumes while aesthetic considerations just don't operate.
On a side note, the Boy and I irresponsibly made up an Arashi concert drinking game a couple of weeks ago. The rules are as follows:
The following occurrences merit a drink:
Inappropriate Boy-touching
Arashi member falling or laying on the ground
Ohno peace sign
Nino floppy hands
Aiba kicky thing (when not part of the choreography)
Sho!fail (as determined and negotiated at the time)
Jun camera whoring, as well as crowd exhorting
Shush. It was the only way I could get the Boy to watch concerts with me. We're not really big drinkers, so let's just say tiny sips ^^"
I bring this up, because when I capped this performance, I realized that when we should probably make our wills out before we get to the Time concert, because good lord *__*
Oh, I forgot that Jun gratuitous tongue action was on the list, too.
I wasn't joking about Ohno and his peace signs. I think what really happened in this performance is that his fingers cramped up and he couldn't help but make the "V" sign . . .
No, really.
The Boy and I like to argue about what specifically counts as Sho!fail.
Ohno, are you trying to kill me?
*weeps*
Seriously, I stopped capping each occurrence after a while, because it hurt too much to even think about it. While Aiba and Ohno were the main offenders, everyone certainly contributed.
A little cute Aiba/Jun just because:
Anyway, this is a truly awesome spectacle of sartorial hubris, I think. The best things I can say about this costume are a) that they only wear it for 10 minutes and b) it snaps down the center and is easy to remove.
It says something about these costumes that the white and pink shirts with shiny pink camo pants they were wearing under this outfit are such a vast improvement.
*hugs for my flist*
I hope you all are doing well&hearts I'm a little swamped, so I'm glad I managed to get this done. I'll probably be a little buried under work for a while, so I'm sorry if I don't get around to commenting in a timely manner ^^" I am also breathlessly awaiting the new concert dvd for more picwar fodder ^_^
/babble
*waves*