old times and older times
It is so weird having gone away to school for four years and then moving back to the same town I grew up in. I had all these friends accumulated in my home town. I was this certain person. Then I went to college and I accumulated a whole other group of friends. I grew up a little bit and I was this slightly different person. So then I graduated, and my circumstances led me right back to my home town, and I got to be with my original group of friends. So a few years go by, and I get these emails or phone calls from people I knew in college. I get this weird twilight zone feeling, like those four years of my life were a realistic dream or something. Maybe I have regressed a little bit, being back home. It is a time in my life where I need to be thinking about getting a better paying job (or a less stressful job with the same pay) so that I can have a wedding and start a family. But sometimes I am sitting in this house and remembering high school and it's like college never happened. I really don't feel mature enough to be married. I really don't know if I will ever be as mature as I want to be before I have children. Then sometimes when I hear from someone from college I feel like...like I don't know how to feel almost. That is part of the reason for an entirely new blog. Not only to get back into the blogging that I used to do, but to start a livejournal over with a clean slate. One with no ties to anything from the past. A new username, and no previous entries from whoever I was all those years ago.