The Behr Legacy 2.2
Want to catch up? The Behrs @ katu_sims, and The Behrs @ fightocrime
CAUTION: 63 images = 3.1MB. Remember how I said last update had tasteful nudity in it? YEAH WELL, THAT'S RIGHT OUT THE WINDY THIS TIME. Sex, nudity, carnal fun times. They're here. And they're oft times NSFW. xD
Athena Isela: *reads subheading on the elljay cut for this update* WHAT IF I NEVER FIND LOVE!? WHO WILL PLOW ME?!
Elfin Magic: *has no empathy whatsoever since she's so ready to be plowed*
Since apparently bagging and tagging Judah Catface last update, she doesn't even need blue eyeshadow or have to hide her face, that Elfin Magic.
Though, perhaps she has SOME doubt, as soon after this she wandered out into the snow in her pajamas to build herself a surrogate boyfriend. Maybe to practice herconversational skills? She needn't worry though, with three bolts neither she nor Judah are anything like ice royals.
Not that they've even been on a date yet. *should possibly fix that*
BUT FIRST! LETS DRIVE ACROSS THE STREET TO EARN SOME MONIES! Though the girls got out of the car and immeadiately started doing this. Nope, these are not Katu's sims at all. Nopes. nada, not possible.
O_O! GAAAH! YOU GUYS! This is the last time I have an open air shop >_>;;
YOU ARE NOT CULLENS, YOU GUYS. STOP PLAYING BASEBALL.
I am removing your employee discount, Wyatt ( jesstheex)... >_>;; .
Uh, I take it back, maybe I AM playing the Cullens and I just temporarily memory lapsed? O_O;;
DAZZLING!? REALLY?!
OKAY FINALLY! The part we've all been waiting for - some of us more than others. Not mentioning, you know, me, or anything, THE FIRST EVER DATE OF JUDAH CATFACE ( brilliantcat ) AND ELFIN MAGIC BEHR!
You may notice that it is apparently in a Cemetary. For the record: THIS IS NOT THE COMMUNITY LOT THAT I CLICKED, OKAY?! When they pulled up here I believe I made this face:
O_O
In rl for about ten minutes and went kersplodey in chat @ brilliantcat and possibly also javabean_dreams for the same amount of time before proceeding. And trust me, there was a LOT MORE of that to come:
Because they headed STRAIGHT to a viewing room within the Cemetary grounds, got naked and sat down. Fin was ready with nothing but a smile on her face, Judah however. He was harnessing his inner lion. Face.
And not his lemon face... *whistles*
Okay so you don't get this naked for an innocent cuddle in a cemetary, I both expect more and fear it simultaneously.
PS: Nice semi-shielding you've got going on there, Judah. FAN SERVICE SNAIL TRAIL THERE FOR THE CHAT GIRLS WHO CLAIMED THEY LOVED IT! xD
And then, after pre-storm calm, IT WAS ON!
Judah hopped straight up into Fin's lap like she was Santa, and she assured him that he had a really special gift waiting for him this year.
With her tongue.
Which I guess she would do regardless of innuendo. I mean have you ever tried to say "Santa's got a really special gift for you this year, as long as you've been a REALLY REALLY good boy." without the use of your tongue?
Its hard!
Just in case you forgot: IN. A. CEMETARY.
Cause I'm really not sure that they remembered.
And as they were doing the whole giggly post-coital cuddling, Enter: XANDER SPOON (javabean_dreams). What the hell, dude?!?!
Xander Spoon: *wanders in and sits down behind the couch under the premise of watching the tv and thinks* Oh hey, isn't that Elfin Magic Behr?
Public Woohoo Podiums: *publically spin about in eyes-rolled-into-the-back-of-their-head ecstaticness*
Xander Spoon: *stands up between for ~emphasis~*
Me: *has gone into shock*
Fin's Pigtails: *attempt to shield the tattered remains of her dignity*
And after THAT, Who here wishes that we'd settled for a 2 bolter!?
EVERYONE?!
I knew it >_>;;
Darina Tampio (johqliini): *rushes in and then sits down somewhere she probably wouldn't want to if she knew from the exertion* OMG YOU GUYS!?!? DID ANYONE HEAR A GHOST IN HERE?! I was SO SURE I heard really loud spooky moaning.
Room: *starts filling at an alarming rate*
Fin & Judah: *AWARE OF NOTHING BUT EACH OTHERRRRRR*
Ebeneezer Scrooge Ouroboros (jtph_jo): Hey?! Did you hear a ghost in here?! I thought I heard a ghost.
Dawn Inkstaind-Stars (inkstaind_stars): YOU HEARD IT TOO?!?!
Tanya Juri-Anne (juri_anne ): OMG DID YOU GUYS HEAR A GHOST IN HERE?! Moaning like a honest-to-god foghorn in THIS VERY ROOM?!?! *gasps*
Dude-on-the-floor-who's-name-i-forget-and-who's-conversation-bubbles-i-didn't-screenshot-like-a-noob: I don't know about a ghost. I mean it did sound like a foghorn. But I think it sounded more like a couple having sex.
Fin & Judah: *eat each others faces*
I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING, his speech bubbles were: Ghost with X through, cruise ship, then the icon of two people standing next to each other. THIS SHIT WRITES ITSELF!
Fin: So I didn't want to say it while we were in the Cemetary - cause it felt kind of disrespectful - but DAYUM that's an impressive WMD you've got lurking in your pants.
Yeah cause THAT would've been WAY more disrespectful than what you guys ACTUALLY DID. And don't give me that celebration of life in a place commemorating death crap. I'M NOT LISTENING! LA LA LA LAAAA!
Meanwhile in the car and outside of Nett's head:
Judah: *Falls in love*
And then they done MOAR sex.
Fin: YAY I HAD NOT AT ALL UNCOMFORTABLE SEXYTIMES!
Me: And you ALSO got knocked up. O_o;;
Which means they have to get married REALLY SOON lest the pregnant belly ruin the getting married in cool wedding dress at huag wedding party plan...
Also, you should really clean those leather seats, like, STAT.
Judah: *loves a girl that'll put out twice in a cemetary on the first date*
Is... Is that a euphamism?
Although I'm kind of sad for him, getting that far up in the sports career track only to have to quit when he gets into the Behrs due to the generation rules.
Although... Trading a pigskin for a booty..?
I guess its not ALL bad ;)
We interrupt our regularly scheduled PORNOGRAPHIES for an important community service announcement:
BROWN COWS PRODUCE CHOCOLATE MILK, YOU GUYS!
Seeing is believing. VISUAL PROOF! Science doesn't lie! EXCEPT WHEN ITS NOT SCIENCE *gasps* The intruigue!
Back at the house, and because the date was over; Judah got up out of bed, put his clothes on and strode purposefully from the house without so much as a by your leave. To the game mechanics, Fin is CLEARLY not happy jan.
*sighs* Yadda yadda, want to brag about all the sex to his mates, yadda yadda. REALLY, Judah, I expected more from you. *pouts*
He left and came back immeadiately on his own accord. JUST CAN'T KEEP A THREE BOLT AWAY. Although, uh, best friends? Consecutive order: You're doing it WRONG.
ZOMG Knowledge sims - though I find them the easiest to play so IDK what that means... - ARE WEIRD.
Athena Isela: So details, girl! Your first time, what was it like?
Athena Isela? You do not want to know. *Shields the elder Behr from that which I could not shield myself nor would not shield others*
SO! A little backstory here. Elfin Magic was working out on the treadmill when Athena Isela answered the phone, the little icon in the pop-up was that of Logan Katuman (katu ), asking if Elfin Magic was available to talk. She was just working out, Judah had just left and I thought, well why not. No harm in her having friends.
I x-ed the treadmill out of her cue and she wandered up to answer the phone to talk to who I thought was Logan Katuman.
As she picked up the phone, WHO SHOULD ACTUALLY BE ON THE PHONE? APPARENTLY Judah?! O_O;; He invited Fin to a community lot and just as I clicked "Okay!" Judah wandered onto the lot, and upstairs straight into Fin's bedroom.
And then this happened:
WHO IS IT IN THE BED THEN, POP-UP?!
Certainly looks like Judah to me.
EXCEPT SHE DIDN'T O_O;;; You're sitting RIGHT THERE.
So in a panic I sat with severe trepidation waiting for the apparent backlash to come.
But over an hour went by, where Judah coached Fin on the weights machine while she did chest enhancing excercises - Guess he's a breast man? - and everthing seemed completey A.OKAY! Crisis averted?! :D
OH LORDY >_<;;;; Apparently not. *sighs*
He still thinks she's hot? ITS STILL GOOD, RIGHT?
*Throws a dazzle in there for good measure*
I'M NOT ABOVE CHEAP SHOTS OF THE CULLEN VARIETY!
*fingers crossed fingers crossed* They're still completely hot for each other, even if they've childishly stopped being friends simply because Fin couldn't make it to an appointment with him because she was already WITH him... >_>;;
GAH!!! DAMN FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY! BAAAH!
Fin: EXCUSE ME!? I'M BEING HATED ON!
Judah: *be's a hatah*
Stuffed Lounge Bear: *attempts to become animate and take a piece of of Judah's jockey shorts*
Considering you're pregnant and don't need undue stresses like the father of your baby suddenly regarding you with unmitigated rage: TO BED WITH YOU..!
Oh, and I might've spent about 20k simoleons or so finally fitting Fin's room out in a style befitting a knowledge sim. ^_^;; If she can't have her man, at least she can be surrounded by excessive amounts of smart. :D
Even though he's a creature made wholly or rage, Judah just KEEPS showing up! He leaves the house and comes straight back again and makes himself at home on his own accord. No one welcomes him, he's just wanders in like he unselectably owns the place.
Anyone would think he LIKED hanging around the house...
GOD NO! NO ONE DOES, LOGAN. YOU FREAKEN TROUBLE MAKER! GAH!
Meanwhile: Hot hate sex.
Followed by a HOLY CRAP NEXT TRIMEST POPLOSION!
Followed by some really full on hot hate... Sleep?
Uh, Athena Isela? Have you been napping on that couch in this room the WHOLE time?!
OH MY GOD SHE HAS! O_O;;;;;
Guys, special rule: Be close to your family, just don't be CLOSE to your family.
Well isn't this a comfortable, albeit private scene?
Perhaps he's over it after all those hot hate snuggles?
Or not.
O_O;; With that expression on his face, maybe he just really LOVES to hate!?
Or just loves? OMG STOP CONFUSING ME YOU GUYS?!?! You just love her for her library of Yomiko Readman-esque proportions, Judah >_>;;
WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT THE CONFUSING?!
WHICH IS IT!?
AAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH...........!
Uh, Fin? He just left in a wave of confusion. Who are you waiting for?
Rufus: *wonders the exact same thing*
WTF, He's already back and evicting the cat!?
Rufus: *is uncharacteristically pushed around*
...And so characteristically wreaks his own brand of revenge.
Rufus: THIS IS WHAT I THINK OF THIS!
I kind of wanting him to reduce the bed to the mdf and broken crockery just to see what happened. Ten bucks they wouldn't even notice and sexytimes on regardless.
Fin is one of THOSE pregnant women. No, not the sim kind where they're constantly bottoming out on all their stats. No no, she's one of those enviable chicks in real life that are mega fit, go to baby yoga and will have a perfectly excellent birth and recovery.
JEALOUS!
And I'm not even pregnant. xD
*gasp* Pink pawpington of the final trimester of the first of generation three Behrs. Don't they always look like they're swimming? xD
Whenever I manage to pause on the pop, I always wants to dip my finger in the 'dust' and swirl it about like water. I swear you could do it...
Generation three secure, if not a wedding... I thought it was HIGH TIME Athena Isela hit the town to try and find herself a lady. And the pickings, they were bountiful. I'd look about smugly to see who was noting your company, too, AI. Iida Tampio (johqliini), Surinim Choose (choose), that hottie generated townie that I love whenever I see her but unfortunately is just 'background'... OM NOM NOM NOMMMM
AAAUUUGH! ♥ Raise your hands if you think Surinim is pretty.
Now you can't scroll down to read the rest and you have to sit here, forever, admiring her beauty. Ah, her diabolical scheme: COMPLETE!
Back at the ranch: Elfin Magic and her pregnant belly = STILL DISGUSTINGLY FIT.
THE HELL?! A SINGLE BIRTH!? IN MY GAME?! Unheard of!
And then I had a super full fist shake at Maxis. WHAT DO YOU MEAN HER AWESOME BEHR PAINTS NAME DOESN'T FIT!? DAMN YOU MAXIS, ONE. MORE. CHARACTER..!
And thusly I went for option two.
World? Welcome Lemon Pepper Behr. :D
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