Addictive Obsession ~ Chapter Twenty-four | part two

[fighter_of_moon]

PART ONE



“I met Pi’s father when I was little and he had helped me defend myself and, basically, he showed me this world.” Jin promptly answered, wondering why was Kazuya curious about his relationship with the two and about his past and not present. “I met Shige… actually I don’t remember how I met him.” He realized with a frown on his face, trying to remember but failing badly.

So simple and without details. Not like Pi or Shige had told him, had described the Jin from back then and their relationship; no… Jin had simplified everything to some mere and easily to be forgotten encounters. Kazuya felt like a stupid. “Did you fear Pi’s father when you first met him?” He asked, thinking of how Pi had described his own parent - cold and merciless.

“I admired that man until the day he died.” Jin confessed with a laugh. “He made me what I am and without him, maybe I would be dead or God knows to whom I’d be sold.” He added and shook his head, like this life was totally impossible for him.

“This doesn’t answer to my question.” Kazuya replied and looked carefully at Jin. He really wanted to know if he had feared the man he had killed for the first time or that if he was still fearing him. Knowing all this gave him the advantage and the disadvantage in the same time. He couldn’t reveal how much he knew and he could see through the gaps Jin was letting unfilled.

“I never feared him, Kazuya.” Jin responded with a sigh and a somehow sad expression.

“Then tell me more about him. How was he like?” Kazuya accepted Jin’s statement, but he wasn’t stopping with the questions. “How did you feel when he died?” He then asked and there was an odd yearning in his voice as he asked this. Really, Jin… how did it feel to kill the person you had admired the most?

“He was…” the older started but stopped himself, not knowing how to describe better the man that had been his mentor for so many years. “He was everything that I wanted to be. Strong, confident, arrogant. Not caring about anyone and doing whatever he pleased. Destroying the ones he hated and protecting the ones he chose.” He said, realizing that these were feelings that he had buried deep inside of him for maybe far too long. “Everything.” He repeated to emphasize how much he had wanted to become that man.

And this scared Kazuya the most as he noticed the hidden desire of Jin’s. He got up from his chair and went to close Jin in his embrace. “I’ll never let you become this man.” The younger said with a hoarse voice and there was a certain strain in it. “He didn’t hold love for anyone… I won’t let you become a person like that.” His embrace tightened around Jin.

The older laughed and hugged Kazuya back, placing a cast kiss on his temple. “While it’s true that I admired him, I also hated him.” He confessed and tightened his hold a little, letting his head fall on his lover’s shoulder. “Besides, I’ll never be like him as long as I have you.” He continued with a smile, thinking that Kazuya was the one to keep him sane in this mad world and insane in this normal life. He won’t do the same mistakes as that man as long as Kazuya was beside him.

Kazuya let out of sigh. He felt half relieved to hear this, but it also weighed down on him. Because this meant that if something happened and they will be pulled apart, Jin will be lost in his own world with no one to pull him back. And this scared Kazuya too. “Why did you hate him?” He asked and his fingers were slowly moving up and down on Jin’s back.

“I think you already know the answer.” Jin chuckled teasingly, not liking the charged atmosphere between them. “While he had been the most incredible man I have ever met, he was also ruthless, loveless. Kazuyaless.” He joked and started to laugh by himself.

Kazuya laughed too, feeling that Jin had a good point in this. “Yeah, too bad that he didn’t have a Kazuya, he would have been a lot more entertained.” He joked as he detached a little from Jin to look at him with an apparent innocent expression. “But you have me and if we sit around more, I’m going to make you miss your appointment.” Kazuya leaned and kissed Jin on the lips. “But I’ll ask more later, don’t you think you escaped.” He chuckled next to his lover’s lips.

“Of course.” Jin answered with a dirty smile on his lips. “Though I doubt you’ll be able to talk seeing that our week off starts the moment we come back from the meeting…” he prolonged the words and faked a sigh, like he was totally desolated that he couldn’t answer anymore to Kazuya’s questions and instead, have sex. “Because I promise you,” he then added quickly, his eyes narrowed a little and darkened with desire as he watched the younger, their lips still touching but not kissing, “that you won’t have a second off.” He announced and the curbs of his lips lifted even more into a perverted grin and a sly smile in the same time.

Kazuya chuckled lowly and bit on Jin’s lip. “I hope you keep true to your word, then.” He said with a provoking voice, clearly enjoying more to do such activities with Jin than to spend time trying to bring the two of them in a better world. For now, it was easier to succumb to such superficial desires, to drown in pure lust. “After all, I’m kind of curious of what you have in mind, you dirty lover.” Kazuya licked the bottom lip he had been biting before he drew back a little.

“Oh, you’ll see.” Jin grinned and looked back at Kazuya with a malicious smile. “You’ll definitely see.”

*

And with the fresh promise of an exhausting sex week, the two of them got ready to go to the meeting place where Jin will sell drugs to the police. Kazuya felt cold sweat down his spine. He wasn’t scared, but he felt uneasy. From what had Jin told him, it was an important transaction but also a dangerous one. They could easily fall into a trap or be hurt because of the buyer’s moodiness. And even if Jin had assured him that everything will be just fine, Kazuya was still feeling troubled, but said nothing more.

They climbed in a black car and drove off, quickly being followed by another two cars and for the moment, Kazuya’s heart started to beat faster, somehow excited to be doing such an illegal and dangerous thing. Even if he hadn’t done anything illegal and wasn’t prone to go against law, as every human, he was subjected to curiosity and desire of once being part of the bad guys.  And right now, together with Jin, he was going in the middle of danger.

Kazuya looked outside the window as he saw they were leaving the outskirts of the town and were going towards an abandoned area. The road they were taking was rarely used since there were buildings not used anymore. The younger felt shivers as he looked around, pecks of vegetation growing wildly near the area; it really made him feel like he was heading straight for the greatest danger. He glanced at Jin and saw that the older looked quite relaxed and apparently bored. But Kazuya glanced to the backseat and saw Pi being in alert - the position of his body gave him away - and when their eyes met, the other smirked perverted as always, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Kazuya was sure that Jin was the same, even if he wasn’t showing it. After all, his lover had always had this calm and confidence when it came to dangerous things. He only lost them when being private with him.

The light suddenly disappeared and Kazuya looked confused before he realized that they had entered one of the abandoned buildings and they were heading for its underground parking lot. He wanted to reach for Jin, but he didn’t want to worry him or to distract him from his work, so Kazuya settled with looking ahead and his heartbeats multiplied as he saw two cars parked in front of them. There were men standing outside - four at number - and Kazuya knew that there were more waiting just in case of trouble. Jin stopped the car.

So… the shit was going to start, huh?

“We’re here.” Jin announced while turning to look at Kazuya, though it was already obvious. He seemed to study his lover for a moment - time that Pi used to get off the car and go to the others to wait for their client to arrive - and bit his lower lip, looking kind of worried. “Do you want to stay in the car?” he asked uncertainly, though his voice betrayed the fact that he wanted an affirmative answer from Kazuya.

“No.” The younger one replied quickly, doubling his negation by shaking his head too. “I want to be there, outside.” He continued and his voice was determined, as well as the look in his eyes. “Why are there so many people here?” Kazuya glanced at Pi who went to talk with the men from the other two cars. Apparently, they were working for Jin too and it looked like they had been searching the area before Jin coming there. Such a tight security kind of scared Kazuya.

“Weeeell…” Jin said and seemed reluctant to answer this question. “Because… we’re giving him a car full with drugs?” he said innocently, trying to look like he hadn’t been the one to say such a thing.

The younger gaped and you could see the shock on his face. “God. What’s he doing? Drugging half of country?!” Kazuya asked as he passed a hand through his hair. “And you really need to tell me how the heck do you manage to get that much drugs.” He then added with a reproaching tone.

“The guy is also a dealer.” Jin replied, settling better on his chair. It seemed that they weren’t going to go out until the other party arrived. “He spreads it even further than this area, to other cities and stuff like that. I don’t really know exactly.” He confessed, thinking that he had never been interested in this and he wasn’t going to start now. “It’s not my business what he does with it.” He then added with a shrug.

Kazuya sighed and stretched his hand towards Jin’s one, grasping it lightly. “Is he late? Or are we too early?” he asked, feeling that he wanted out of this place as soon as possible.

“I’m early for the first time in my life.” Jin joked and laughed a little, sensing how tensed was Kazuya and wanting to make him feel better. “And it’s all thanks to you.” He added with a playful smirk, entwining his hand with the younger’s and lifting the other one to play with Kazuya’s hair.

The other one chuckled and closed his eyes at the touch of Jin. “I think I’m a little nervous.” He said as he opened his eyes and looked at his lover. “But at least I’ll have you away from such things for a week.” Kazuya smiled and looked pleased.

“I’ll be all yours for an entire week.” Jin said with a slightly perverted smile, his hands slowly descending on the younger’s arm. “And you…” he wanted to say something else, but stopped himself when he saw others cars arriving. He looked back at Kazuya and saw him stiffened, making Jin chuckle a little. “It will be fine.” He assured, kissing briefly his lover on his lips, before getting out of the car, not calling the boy to come with him even if Kazuya followed him nonetheless, looking a bit pale and unsure. The boy closed the door and went to Jin’s side, his eyes following the new cars and watching carefully as three men came out of one car, one wearing a particular smile on his face. The younger thought immediately that he must be the client, the corrupt policeman. And he looked like a fine and nice man - how deceiving appearances could be!

“Jin, how nice to see you again.” The man greeted and Jin nodded his head in response, his eyes searching for Kazuya and pulling him closer, to be sure that in case of anything, the younger will be safe with him. These things were dangerous because you never knew how fast could the police get there and arrest them all.

“Same here.” Jin replied with a light smile, entwining his hand with Kazuya’s when he saw the man looking at him and studying the boy, like he wanted to say he’s mine, bitch, and don’t come closer. “It’s always a pleasure to do business with you.” He added with a pleasant smile, much too pleasant to be real but the other one didn’t seem to notice.

“I’m sure it is as I’m one of your biggest clients.” The man replied and laughed a little with a superior tone, still looking at Kazuya. Jin had to suppress his urge to hit him.

“These are the keys of the car.” Jin continued, not being in the mood for more discussion as he threw the keys of the car they had been driving. “You can check it if you want.” He added with a shrug and the man laughed again.

Kazuya grasped back Jin’s hand, feeling his body tensed as he also studied the man in front of him. He didn’t look dangerous, but unexpectedly nice. Well and maybe a little superior by the way he was talking. If not for the special circumstances, Kazuya would have been fooled by this man and only a careful analysis would have made him a suspect in his eyes. But as for his lover... Jin looked totally dangerous and you could see it in his every move, even if he appeared detached and everything. Yet, Kazuya knew better right now. He was facing two dangerous men in every aspect, no matter how they looked.

“No, no, there’s no need.” The man replied after a short pause, now studying the keys like they were something he hadn’t seen before. “Here is the money.” He said and threw another pair of keys to Jin, slightly pointing with his head at the car parked near theirs. Jin threw a look at it and whistled contently.

“It’s…” he wanted to say something, but was suddenly stopped. Other cars suddenly appeared and blocked their way out, people climbing down from them and hiding behind them, their guns pointed towards Jin and the ones surrounding him. A sudden flash of light fell over them, blinding all of them for a second as one of the newcomers started to yell.

“Police!! Don’t move and raise your hands!”

“Oh, my head.” Jin sighed tiredly, shaking his head a little as if he didn’t want to believe that such a bother had appeared exactly in that moment.

Kazuya froze beside Jin as only his eyes moved trying to grasp the gravity of the situation they were in. His heart was thumping loudly and a cold sweat was sliding down his spine. His hand grasped tighter on Jin’s, not really getting how they should get out of this mess. But as agitated he felt, as calm Jin appeared to be. Were they able to get away from this? Together?

“The whole area is surrounded!” the guy from the police continued. “You have no way to escape!”

As soon as the last words escaped his lips, more things seemed to happen in the same time. Gun fires were heard and Jin pushed Kazuya towards the foreign car, taking care to protect him with his body all the time. Jin’s men also hid behind their cars though two of them remained behind, victim of the police’s gunshots. Four men from the other side fell but their boss got to his car safely and hid in it, probably worried not to be recognized and choosing not to fight because of this. Jin ducked Kazuya behind the car and took a moment to breathe and search for a solution.

“Are you okay?” he asked the boy with a worried tone while studying his figure, his mind still searching for the right answer.

Kazuya had a lump in his throat and couldn’t speak for the moment, so he just nodded his head, though his face was pale and his eyes glossed with fear. It was a first for him to be involved into such a situation and truth to be told, he could only think of getting out of there together with Jin. He didn’t even care about the others. He just wanted the two of them to be safe.

Jin seemed satisfied that Kazuya was aware enough of his surroundings to leave him alone and concentrate at the scene in front of him. He peeked from the car and saw that his men were holding up, though he couldn’t say the same thing about his client. But the problem was the number and the police definitely had more of them waiting outside, ready to shoot them down if one of them succeeded to leave the parking lot.

What could they do? He had to save Kazuya no matter, but he had to think at his men too. Without them, Jin would be nothing and he had to protect them in order to keep their respect and loyalty. He desperately needed a plan and a good one or they’ll lose their lives.

“Pi!” he called his friend when he saw him approaching, distracting him for a moment and making him miss his target. The other one hissed and came closer quickly, knowing that this wasn’t the time to argue. “These are the special cars that I’ve asked you for?” Jin wanted to know and looked hopefully at Pi.

Something clicked in Yamapi’s mind. “Nice job.” He answered, already knowing what was Jin thinking of. It was a dangerous move, but they had a chance. Still, they needed a diversion.

“I’m on it.” Jin said before Pi voicing out his concerns. “Take care of Kazuya.” He said as he took out his own gun, loaded it and left towards the middle of the fight without looking back.

“Jin!” Kazuya wanted to take off after his lover, but a bullet hit the car right in front of him, making him back away and hide. But he couldn’t just stay there and he had to look to see where Jin was, to see if he was okay. How could the idiot leave like that?! He wasn’t wearing anything but a fucking T-shirt! What if a bullet hit him? What if… oh, fuck!! “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” He cursed Jin as he looked out again, searching for him and not looking at Pi once.

Unfortunately for Kazuya, Jin didn’t seem to be anywhere and as much as he looked around, he couldn’t spot him through the gun fires that were still resounding around him, the older one’s men still fighting alone without their leader in their sight and making Kazuya even more frustrated with worry. Jin returned after a few minutes though with an extremely satisfied smile on his lips. “I’m a genius!” he stated proudly, the grin on his face widening even more as he looked from Pi who was shaking his head in denial and Kazuya who was on the verge of crying out of anger and worry. He really wanted to kick Jin right now, but the situation they were in demanded special attention. He'd kick him later if they got out of there alive.

Jin didn’t say anything more about his brilliant plan and just watched Pi as he left them to tell the others about their boss’s plan, making Kazuya realize why he hadn’t been able to see Jin going to his men - he had been on the other side, with the corrupted police man and his own crew. It took five more minutes until something began to move. At first, Jin’s client’s cars. They had all climbed into them and backed as much as they had been able to while being protected by Jin’s men and then they dashed forward, right in the middle of the police’s cars. As they continued to crash one into another, it became clear that there were strategically choosing points on which to bump, clearing a small path between the police’s forces.

Jin’s men were the next ones to move. Taking advantage of the confusion and the dust that made it impossible to see, they all took off too and cleared the path even more, they being the first ones who had been able to escape from that trap. Jin had quickly climbed Kazuya into one of their cars and shouted to the driver to go, dashing forward and not stopping even as a storm of bullets was falling over them, Jin covering Kazuya’s body with his own all the time. Some more cars followed them but one of them didn’t have their luck and didn’t make it.

It exploded behind them with half of the police.

Kazuya stood still under Jin’s body, though involuntarily he had flinched when the loud explosion had been heard behind them. Did Jin just blow them off? He thought as he opened his eyes and shifted a little in order to look at Jin. Everything had happened in a flash, he had barely had time to see everyone moving into certain positions before Jin had hauled him into a car and hell had gone loose. He was quite in a state of shock, but it was slowly wearing off as he stared at his lover and everything came back into focus, everything settling down in his brain. “We’re safe. You’re safe.” Kazuya muttered as he brought a trembling hand to Jin’s face and vaguely smiled. Thank God.

“Of course we are.” Jin pouted, feeling offended that Kazuya had doubted him. He would never let anything happen to the younger one and he wouldn’t let anyone hurt him. Kazuya was his and only his, no one else had the right to touch him, no matter the intentions.

“You should have more confidence in your lover.” Pi said with a chuckle from the front seat from where he was driving the car. “After all, he is our boss for something.” He pointed out with a proud tone, like he was a father talking about his son.

Kazuya heaved a sigh before giving Jin a soft whack. “He’s stupid.” He said with a whining voice before he hugged Jin and nuzzled his face in the crook of his neck. He was so glad that nothing had happened to him. Right now… he couldn’t even imagine a life without Jin.

“Yeah, yeah.” Jin laughed and hugged Kazuya tightly, happy to have him again in his arms and relieved that nothing had happened to him.

He had protected his lover, exactly how he said he would.

*

It was the third night where he woke up drenched in sweat, clutching to his pillow and feeling his throat raw. He had been screaming again, he was sure of this. Lately, it had turned into a habit to do this each time he had nightmares. Because he was having them again and they were slowly bringing him to the edge.

Kazuya looked to his right and touched the empty place beside him. It still felt warm even if Jin had gotten up from bed an hour ago. It still kept his presence. But this didn’t stop the nightmares from coming back to haunt him. And each time, they ended the same way and the ringing in his ears never ceased. He brought his hands around his thin frame, holding it tightly. He honestly couldn’t take it anymore, ever since that day when Jin had run into that crossfire, Kazuya had been slowly consumed by his thoughts. And what scared and wore him the most was the one of losing Jin, the one where he won’t see his lover anymore.

Just when did he become dependent of Jin, he wasn’t aware. He just knew that now without Jin, he could no longer feel the same, he wasn’t whole anymore. Because now his life was revolving around Jin and no one else. But he was slowly losing his sanity, his control, his everything. He was scared, he wasn’t able to think past Jin’s dead body.

This was what he had been dreaming for three days, after Jin had touched him in so many ways, clouding his mind with passion and lust. Kind of pathetic, no? The man that had been so vividly pulsing inside of him was bleeding to death in his dreams. But Kazuya couldn’t control this, he had tried but he had failed. No matter how many times he reassured himself that Jin was okay and safe, each time the older one went away from him, fear would clutch on his heart and wouldn’t leave him even in his dreams. No, it would take the most terrifying forms to torture him, to make him cry and scream, to curse the skies and hell for what was happening to him.

Jin was dying in his arms, bubbles of blood forming above his lips as he was trying to say to Kazuya his last words. But he was mortally wounded and the effort was killing him even more. And Kazuya was helpless, useless, he could only cry and scream, threaten and feebly hit Jin’s body, wanting it to react, not wanting to let him die. But it was futile and Jin was slowly disappearing, was going away and Kazuya was left behind in a dark world where he couldn’t find his place with Jin gone.

The younger one began rocketing his body back and forth on the bed, the vivid images from his nightmares still printed on his eyes, and he could still hear the gun shots, he could still smell the gun powder and the scent of blood mixed with Jin’s one. He wanted to get away from all this, he wanted to hear, feel, sense, smell no more… he just wanted Jin safe. And right now he wasn’t sure which was reality and which was his own mind’s work.

For twenty two years, Kazuya had never felt fear for anyone else beside him. He hadn’t thought of anyone else being safe except him, he hadn’t felt the need to know someone was safe or to protect that someone. But being in that crossfire and Jin risking all that had shown him that he could feel such things for another person than him, that he could know fear for someone he cared so much for.

And he was desperately lost in between reality and nightmare, where he couldn’t distinguish who was the real Jin anymore. One moment he was expecting to be left all alone, with Jin gone and with life having no meaning anymore. It was a terrifying thought among the many he had had lately. But the desire to protect Jin had been growing inside of him more and more, being like a burning flame that no one could put out. He wasn’t important anymore, Jin was the one that was now giving sense to his life, Jin was the reason he had been enduring so much, the reason he had had to fight his demons and he had to succeed in stealing Jin from this cruel world he was living in.

Suddenly the door of Jin’s room opened and Kazuya raised his head to see him entering inside, looking tired but alive. Without any further thought, he jumped out of the bed and clung onto Jin, claiming his lips in a heated kiss - he needed to feel him, to be sure.

Jin answered to the kiss, although a little unsure of why was Kazuya acting like this. He let his instincts take over and circled his hands around the boy’s waist, holding him close and trying to reassure him that he’ll protect Kazuya from the invisible monsters that were tormenting his soul. “Hey, are you okay?” Jin asked with a slightly worried voice as he detached himself from Kazuya to be able to look into his eyes. While it was weird to have Kazuya suddenly jump into his arms, Jin couldn’t help but worry as he held onto the boy’s slightly trembling body.

Kazuya looked at Jin and smiled feebly as he brought both of his hands to cup Jin’s face. “You’re safe.” He muttered and pecked the older one’s lips tenderly. “I’m okay.” He then answered to Jin’s question as he embraced him again, this time tighter. “Where have you been?” Kazuya asked with a mumbling voice as his face was hidden in the other one’s chest this time.

Jin’s eyes widened as he realized that Kazuya had needed reassurance that they were both okay, completely forgetting his own question and believing that Kazuya had referred to himself too because he had been scared he wasn’t safe either. He forced himself to smile and to keep a calm voice as he tightened his hold on the boy. “I was with Pi, he called me for something.” He replied with a light tone, placing a kiss on the younger one’s temple. “Did I wake you up?” he then asked, sounding concerned about this.

Kazuya shook his head, the image of a bleeding Jin popping back in his mind. “No, I woke up by myself. I guess…” He looked up at Jin and despite his paleness, he seemed to be better. “… I missed you.” He continued cheekily and detached a little from Jin, but his hands still lingered on his lover’s waist, not willing to let go completely. “But you should have told me you were going to leave…” Kazuya pouted as his tone sounded reproachful.

“You were sleeping so I didn’t want to wake you for this.” Jin confessed with a smile and leaned over to place a short kiss on Kazuya’s lips. “Besides,” he continued as he pulled on the boy’s hand and led him towards the bed, “I thought I will be back before you wake up, but it seems that I was a few minutes late.” It was his turn to pout as he sat on the bed and pulled Kazuya to sit on his lap, his hands still protectively around the boy’s waist.

Kazuya chuckled as he cuddled up against Jin, letting his head rest on his shoulder. His hand was where his lover’s heart was beating and the younger one couldn’t suppress a sigh of relief. Jin was there with him, alive and kicking. Nightmares weren’t coming back to him, not anymore. But the fact that there was a possibility - and a high one too - for Jin to disappear from Kazuya’s sight, the younger had to take Jin out of this world, he had to make the other one leave it behind. Otherwise, he’ll lose his life one day and Kazuya won’t be able to live without him.

This horrible thought was like a thorn in Kazuya’s heart and it was slowly sinking, painfully reminding him how close he was to lose Jin. And they had barely found each other. He had to make Jin leave behind this dangerous world that could tear them apart. And for starters, he had to convince his lover to let Shige be the one taking care of him and not Pi. Something told him that finding out about Hayato will help him greatly.

“Jin.” He said to bring his lover’s attention on him. “I know it’s not the best time, but I want you to let Shige take Pi’s place.” He continued and gulped a little. He had a card to play and he was hoping to convince Jin. “After that time… I want you more than ever safe and Pi will be more of help than anyone else, right?” Kazuya asked and he was sure that Jin was aware of what he was trying to say. “I… Each time you’ll go from now on, I won’t stop worrying and by the time you’ll return, I’ll go look after you. But! If Pi’s with you, I think I can be a little more eased…” He looked at Jin as he chewed on his lower lip, worry written in each feature of his face.

“Mou, why do you have more faith in Pi than me?” Jin pouted and let his head fall on the boy’s shoulder, happily inhaling his scent. “I already showed you that I can take care of myself, haven’t I?” he then asked, turning his head a little to be able to look at Kazuya but still not moving from his spot. “Besides, he still comes with me if there are big gigs or it’s more dangerous.” He confessed and then suddenly raised his head, looking with a suspicious gaze and narrowed eyes at Kazuya. “And why Shige? What business do you have with him? When did you talk to him that much?” an avalanche of questions came over Kazuya, Jin’s tone clearly indicating that he didn’t like at all this - of course, it wasn’t because he was jealous, he refused to accept this.

Kazuya smiled as he put a finger on Jin’s lips. “I want Pi to be with you because he seems to understand you the best when you’re… out there.” He explained his reason for choosing Pi. “And I want Shige because after Pi, he’s the only one I know from all those buildings. And I know he’s the one tailing me all the time, so I don’t see why it should be a problem, seeing that you trust him enough to entrust my safety to him.” Kazuya continued, but then he remembered Jin had asked when did he talk with Shige. “Oh, and we fought and I went out, I tried to escape him and I kind of got in the middle of a few gangsters of yours and Shige saved me. That’s when we talked.” He said and hoped that when asked, Shige will agree to his version. “And I asked him not to tell you about this.” Kazuya let his head down, pretending to be regretting and ashamed.

Jin looked at Kazuya like he wasn’t fully convinced. “Pi comes with me when I need him.” He decided to reply, his eyes still watching the boy like he was trying to find the hidden truth from his features. “And besides, Shige is basically the one to assure your safety when you’re not here. And if you’re in this building, you don’t need anyone’s help. Well, if you don’t suddenly decide to run, that is.” He added after a short pause, pursing his lips in a way that clearly said he disapproved this.

Kazuya closed his eyes; Jin was driving him insane. “Don’t you understand?” He asked as he opened his eyes back and stared back into Jin’s black ones. “You don’t know what it means for me to be left behind and wait for you, not knowing if you’re going to be really okay or not.” He said and his voice seemed like breaking. “If you’re going to come back alive or… dead.” He whispered the last word, not wanting to say it out loud for fear it might happen. “Even if you say you’re okay… even if you say you can handle everything by yourself, I… will end up worrying even more. And it’s not because I don’t trust your abilities or anything of sort.” Kazuya paused and touched Jin’s cheek, his fingers slightly trembling. “It’s just that I am scared for you.” He whispered the words, having admitted out loud something that he had never been able to say it. “And I want the best of your people to be there with you. It’s better if they die… but not you.” Kazuya rested his forehead on Jin’s and closed his eyes again, realizing that he was agreeing to other people’s death, but not Jin’s. And hell be damned if he cared.

“You silly boy.” Jin chuckled, honestly kind of amused of Kazuya’s outburst and the stupid idea that something could happen to him or that he’d be much safer with Pi. “Alright then, if it makes you feel better, I’ll make Pi work extra hours and I’ll bring him everywhere with me. Happy now?” he asked with a light tone, his eyes boring into the boy’s ones, their foreheads still touching.

Kazuya’s eyes brightened and he tackled Jin, making him fall down on the bed and him on top of the older one. “I love you.” He whispered softly and kissed his lover at first gently and then a bit more dominant. Then he pulled back a little and nuzzled their noses together. “I hope Shige won’t be upset that he’ll be looking after me even inside the building.” He looked a bit worried at Jin.

“He won’t be as he doesn’t have any reason to do so.” Jin cocked an innocent eyebrow at him. “You’re safe in the building now even without Pi.” He continued with a smirk. He didn’t need to say how much time he had put into threatening each one of his guys not to touch Kazuya and not even spare him a glance if the boy didn’t want them to. Some things were better to keep to himself.

Kazuya blinked a few times, confused. “B-but, Jin…” He stuttered, looking like a kicked puppy. “Even if I’m safe… I can’t be alone all by myself. And as I can’t quite bring Koki there, you could at least let someone I know stay with me…” He continued, a plea obvious in his voice. “Imagine if you leave me alone until you come back. I’ll be chewing the office if not else.” He tried to joke, but it was shown clear on his face that he was really going to do that if left alone. Just think about it - Kazuya alone with his thoughts. By the time Jin returned, Kazuya would think he had already perished.

“You can always leave.” Jin shrugged a little and stood up, sitting on the edge of the bed, slightly turned around to keep on seeing Kazuya. “If there’s no one here to keep you company, you can go home or do some shopping or hang out with Koki.” He suggested, even if the tone he had used for his last words implied that he hated that thought. “I’m not keeping you here against your will, Kazuya. Heck, you can even go out with Shige.” He laughed a little, though he still couldn’t really control his jealousy that another guy had appeared to stand between him and Kazuya.

The younger one looked carefully at Jin and felt that the older one was keen on keeping Shige out of his office at any cost. “Jin.” He called his lover’s name. “What are you hiding?” Kazuya asked and his eyes never left the other one’s. “It’s like you don’t want Shige to stay with me while I’m waiting for you in the office…” He continued and there was a reproach in his voice. “What’s wrong? Tell me.” He drew closer to Jin, his hand gently brushing his lover’s arm.

“What are you hiding?” Jin shot back, obviously starting to get a little annoyed. “It’s like you want Shige to stay with you in my office and not just because you’re simply bored there.” He said while standing up and going to his dresser to search for more comfortable clothes. If Kazuya thought that he was blind and hadn’t noticed how many times he had already tried to talk to him about Shige, then the younger one was going in for a surprise.

Kazuya bristled at Jin’s not-so-subtle words. “I’m not the one holding up secrets. You are.” He retorted and his tone carried annoyance too. “And don’t throw on my back your secrets; it’s obvious you are afraid of letting Shige get near your office!” He continued and then added with a derisive tone: “It’s not like you care who looks after me instead of you.”

“And why should I be afraid?” Jin asked with a calm voice that rather predicted a storm coming, the sound of the dresser’s door slamming shut being the evidence. “What do you know about me and Shige?” he continued with a hiss as he started to get closer to Kazuya, totally forgetting about wanting to change clothes - though that had been a diversion to calm himself down that it had failed badly. “Why do you want to have Shige in my office so badly?” Jin wanted to know and put a knee on the bed, his eyes sparkling with fury as he closed his hand around Kazuya’s cheeks. “What did he tell you?” he snapped and even if his tone had remained as in the beginning, it was clear that things were starting to get a little more dangerous.

Kazuya shook his head to get rid of Jin’s claw like hold, but he couldn’t. Instead he looked defiantly at him, his eyes sparkling with fury. “Should he tell me something?” he snarled as his own hands grabbed Jin by the collar. “Should I need a reason to have Shige with me in your office?” He continued as he gritted his teeth and his eyes flared some more. “Should you need a reason to keep him away from your office?”

Jin didn’t need that much to unclench the hands from his collar, throwing Kazuya on the bed and prompting himself on the boy, pinning his hands above his head with one arm and using the other one to hold the younger’s head the same as earlier. “I don’t like this at all.” He said while his eyes searched Kazuya’s for any kind of answer. He looked pretty disappointed when he failed to understand what was going through the boy’s mind and cursed himself for being unable to. “I swear to God, Kazuya,” he started with a determined and slightly cold tone, completely ignoring the fact that he didn’t believe in God, “if I ever find out you are planning something behind my back or did something which I wouldn’t like…” he threatened, letting the rest of the sentence linger in the air. “If you happen to betray me…” he stopped yet again, not finishing just to show that he wasn’t decided on the punishment but that it would definitely be something to remember.

And Kazuya should know this best.

The younger didn’t struggle to get out from Jin’s hold, but he held his gaze with the same defiance his whole body resumed. “You’re as stupid as ever.” He hissed and his eyes sparkled mockingly. “How the fuck could I ever betray you?!” He then snarled, looking only repulsed at this idea. Kazuya dismissed the idea that collaborating with Shige might mean a sort of betrayal to Jin. But to the younger, it was most certainly not. “I wouldn’t let others hurt you, especially with my help.” Kazuya smirked and there was a tint of evilness in his voice as he continued talking. “I’d rather hurt you with my bare hands than act through someone else. I thought I showed that to you already.” His brown eyes followed an invisible line down to Jin’s chest and stopped where he had crested the older one’s skin.

“I didn’t refer only to physical pain.” Jin pointed out as he let his eyes travel on the boy’s body, knowing that there were a lot who would give anything to have it. He would kill them all. “Besides, it seems rather strange to me that you’d prefer to stay here with Shige than to go out with Koki.” He continued, still not fully convinced and reminding Kazuya that Jin himself had suggested this.

Kazuya’s eyes slowly traveled back to meet Jin’s. “Koki’s busy with college.” He replied with a lazy tone, though it was obvious he was bothered by this. “I can’t make him hang out with me just because I’m bored and my boyfriend is out killing people or…” A shiver passed through his body and fear glittered for a moment in his eyes. “… or waiting to be killed. And I never said I’d prefer having Shige over Koki.” He rolled his eyes, slightly annoyed at Jin’s remark.

The older one sighed and freed Kazuya even if it was rather reluctantly, but still remained above him. “I still don’t understand why exactly Shige.” He said, not willing to give up though he was clearly starting to. “I mean, he hadn’t been the only one following you to be special because of this. And I’ve seen you talk with others guys that usually come there and who have access to my office.” Jin emphasized the word ‘have’ to state that there was a difference between his men.

Kazuya lifted himself a bit and supported his weight on his elbows as he looked at Jin. “Well, I like him better than the other guys.” He said with a nonchalant shrug. “And he said he had studied Psychology, so he’s by far more interesting than the rest, no?” He smiled confidently, feeling that Jin will soon capitulate in front of his persistence. And finally, he’ll find out about Hayato and his connection with Jin and how to make the older one leave this destructive world.

Jin still didn’t give an affirmative answer but he did lean down a little more to catch Kazuya’s lips into a short and sweet kiss, just using his lips and nibbling on the boy’s ones in a taunting way. “I’ll kill him if something happens.” He suddenly said, his mouth still against Kazuya’s as Jin looked at his lover and waited for an answer or a reaction.

The color of Kazuya’s eyes darkened, but the low chuckle that came out was contradictory. “Like what?” he asked as he traced Jin’s lips with the tip of tongue.

“Like anything.” Jin replied, suddenly serious as he stared back. He was still sure that there was something weird with this sudden request of Kazuya’s, but Jin decided not to dwell on that matter any longer. In any case, it seemed that his lover wasn’t going to confess anything so the only thing he could do was to wait for them to make a mistake or, even better, to lay down a trap.

Luckily, he still had cameras in his office.

PART THREE