The Soda Incident
So I got my car washed and then went to the mall yesterday. I had my sunroof open because it was a pretty nice day (and by "pretty nice" I mean that the humidity wasn't at the point where I wanted to put a bullet in my head). As I'm driving towards the entrance, I pass a Wendy's, and suddenly remembered this story:
Back in the day, during the 8th and 9th grades, I was a major mall rat. My best friend at the time lived within walking distance of the mall (which is fucking huge), and we would spend all of our free time there. Literally. ALL of our free time.
Anyway, so one day a group of us were walking through Wendy's parking lot, headed to the mall. It was a bright and shiny day - the sun was out, no clouds, not too hot. I saw a cup sitting on the curb of that parking lot, and decided to kick it, because that's the kind of day it was. A bright and shiny, cup-kicking kind of day.
So without looking around, or really stopping to think about what I was doing, I take two quick steps and kick the shit out of this cup.
I didn't see the car driving down the road until after the cup, which, as it turns out, had been full of orange soda, hit it. My friends and I all froze, literally, right on the spot, all of us with gaping jaws. The car came to a screeching halt and a guy stuck his head out the window and started SCREAMING at us.
He probably wouldn't have been so pissed if he hadn't JUST gotten his car washed. And he probably wouldn't have been so pissed if his window hadn't been opened, which allowed orange soda to get all over him and the interior of his car.
But, as luck would have it, he had just gotten his car washed and his window was open.
So he's screaming at us and starts to get out of his car saying something about "kicking some ass" and "calling the cops". So we did what any kid would to - we ran the fuck out of there. As fast as we could, towards the mall, with me screaming "I'm so sorry!" over my shoulder.
To this day I still feel really bad about it, but goddamn, it was fucking funny.
Back in the day, during the 8th and 9th grades, I was a major mall rat. My best friend at the time lived within walking distance of the mall (which is fucking huge), and we would spend all of our free time there. Literally. ALL of our free time.
Anyway, so one day a group of us were walking through Wendy's parking lot, headed to the mall. It was a bright and shiny day - the sun was out, no clouds, not too hot. I saw a cup sitting on the curb of that parking lot, and decided to kick it, because that's the kind of day it was. A bright and shiny, cup-kicking kind of day.
So without looking around, or really stopping to think about what I was doing, I take two quick steps and kick the shit out of this cup.
I didn't see the car driving down the road until after the cup, which, as it turns out, had been full of orange soda, hit it. My friends and I all froze, literally, right on the spot, all of us with gaping jaws. The car came to a screeching halt and a guy stuck his head out the window and started SCREAMING at us.
He probably wouldn't have been so pissed if he hadn't JUST gotten his car washed. And he probably wouldn't have been so pissed if his window hadn't been opened, which allowed orange soda to get all over him and the interior of his car.
But, as luck would have it, he had just gotten his car washed and his window was open.
So he's screaming at us and starts to get out of his car saying something about "kicking some ass" and "calling the cops". So we did what any kid would to - we ran the fuck out of there. As fast as we could, towards the mall, with me screaming "I'm so sorry!" over my shoulder.
To this day I still feel really bad about it, but goddamn, it was fucking funny.