[Supernatural]: You'd Better Not Go Alone

[minviendha]

Title: You'd Better Not Go Alone
Fandom: Supernatural
Recipient: mimblexwimble
Summary: Fifth in the Beneath the Trees verse. Sam doesn't do Stanford. No one is happy.
Notes: So you know how I was talking about things getting better? ...yeah. Sorry. Happy holidays?

Comments

[lunasky3]

fuuuuuuuuuck, Sam *wraps in warm blankets*

[minviendha]

...I should really start being nicer to him, shouldn't I? Here, take him for a while, you'd probably take better care of him. >>

[jesseofthenorth]

There are so many layers of hurt to this series but what it really boils down to for me personally is that this pretty much exactly what I think would have happened if Sam hadn't left for Stanford.
Really tremendously well done.

[minviendha]

As do I. This is the harsh, bitter reality that is honestly the only thing I can see happening in that scenario.

Thank you!

[de_nugis]

You know what freaks me out about this? How much the "doing better" Sam of this 'verse looks like the "I'm fine" Sam of current canon. It's not like Sam fakes function, it's like functioning is his way of faking, sometimes.

I also love the almost moment of almost connection when Sam gets Dean to smile.

[minviendha]

Heh. I am not sure if that was intentional or not, actually...probably at least a little. Subconsciously. I'll go ahead and take credit for it, anyway.

Yes, that moment. I think that's the happiest thing out of this whole installment.

Thank you for commenting!

[marziebarz]

I’m not what you think I am, Sam wanted to say. Not anymore. I don’t know if I ever was.

OH LOOK ITS MY HEART. ON THE FLOOR. *gives to you* you should just keep this.

I never had choices, Sam thought. I was stupid to think I did. Stupid to think that what I wanted meant anything much.

oops apparently I missed a couple chunks. *hands them over*

He fell asleep to that. There’s always a way out. If I ever can’t do it anymore, I know how to make an end.Oh. No. Here. Just take my soul while you're at it. Its cool I dont need it anymore

[minviendha]

Hi I am sorry. D: Here, you can have it back now, I think I glued it together mostly?

Thank you so much I enjoy your suffering. This universe is very...it's almost personal, for me, in some ways. I definitely channel a lot of emotional energy into it. And this is, yes, exactly where I see Sam if he hadn't gotten out for at least a little while. I just don't think he could survive without a break.

So yes. I really kind of want to make things better, but honestly, at this point, I don't know that they can.

[sinka]

You are EVIL!!! I really really thought it was going better, but damn it, it makes so much sense this way... only Sam would know exactly how to get deeper into his depression hole and pretend he's okay at the same time (I'm feeling season 7 vives here?). The worst part is that even Dean knows something is really wrong (and understand when it started) he doesn't really have a clue about what's the real issue and how to fix it. The more he worries, the more Sam feels it's his fault. How can Dean help him if in the end it's all about Dean himself? Such a mess.

This story hurs in all the right places. But I have faith in you. I know it *will* get better. Eventually.

Merry Christmas! And thanks for continuing this awesome 'verse!

[minviendha]

I did too! I really did. D: But then he springs this on me, but I don't think it really should be a surprise. Because things are not that easy, and just because Dean knows doesn't mean he can really help. And yeah, you've hit the nail on the head - the more Dean worries, the more Sam is going to shut down and shut him out. Ouch.

Merry Christmas to you! And thank you for continuing to follow this, even as it goes dark(er).