Little Earthquakes (Chapter 18)
Title: Little Earthquakes (18/?)
Pairing: Callie/Arizona
Rating: NC-17
Summary: When Arizona is attacked in the parking lot of Seattle Grace, everything changes...and her relationship with Callie is put to the test.
Content Warning
This story deals with the topic of rape and recovery. I am rating it a hard M for graphic depictions of rape, violence, and, eventually, consensual sex.
I would never write about rape frivolously, nor to titillate. There's a lot of fan fiction out there that deals with sexual assault in all manner of ways, many of them distasteful. The last thing I want to do is add to the litany of "rapefic" that traumatizes beloved characters for the sake of creating a juicy story.
At the same time, rape and sexual assault is a reality. As such, I believe it is a legitimate subject for fiction, especially when the focus is not so much on the physical act but on the psychological repercussions, the aftershocks such an event can unleash in a survivor's life.
If the frank depiction of rape and the pain of recovery (physical, emotional, and sexual) is likely to trigger or otherwise upset you, I would honestly give this story a pass. I don't plan on pulling any punches. I do plan on handling this the most respectful way I know how.
I won't even bother apologizing for the delay this time. But I do want to thank everyone who is reading, especially those of you who have taken the time to offer comments, reviews, and private notes. You keep me focused and motivated, and you are making writing this story a very worthwhile experience indeed.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Callie walked into Joe's holding Arizona's hand, happier than she had been in a long time. And she wasn't the only one-Arizona was positively glowing. Perky in the way only she could pull off without setting Callie's teeth on edge, a grinning Arizona bounced as they made their way across the crowded, noisy room to an empty table.
As much as Callie hated to admit it, her giddy energy was infectious.
Knowing she must look like a smiling idiot, Callie pulled out a chair for her girl. "You're in a good mood."
Arizona's eyes sparkled as she brought her mouth to Callie's ear. "I got laid last night." She sat down and scanned Callie's body in a sultry, deliberate appraisal. "And I have a feeling I might get lucky again this evening."
Callie snorted, but dragged her chair next to Arizona's, as close as she could get. The memory of their lovemaking reignited her passion so quickly and completely, she would have followed Arizona into the dirty bar bathroom for a quickie if asked. But she couldn't resist responding with a teasing, "We'll see."
"Playing hard to get?" Arizona narrowed her eyes. "Really, Calliope?"
Callie very carefully moved Arizona's hair aside and kissed her earlobe. "No, not really. Just don't want you to think I'm easy."
Shivering, Arizona turned her head and brushed her lips against Callie's, drawing away with a flick of her tongue. "I already know you're easy, darling. And I love that about you."
Callie moved to deepen their kiss, but stopped at the sound of a throat clearing nearby. Pulling back and refocusing her attention on their surroundings, she greeted a clearly amused Addison with an embarrassed wave. "Hi."
"Am I interrupting?" Addison arched an eyebrow. "I can go hang out with Joe for a while, if you two want to be alone."
Arizona's face reddened, but she didn't lose her easy smile. "We'll behave. It's good to see you again, Addison."
"You, too." Addison smirked at Callie, signaling her intention to give her a little bit of a hard time. "All the many hours Callie has spent telling me how 'awesome' you are, and we've barely had a chance to hang out. It'll be nice to see for myself just what kind of woman is capable of completely enchanting our Dr. Torres."
Callie stood and pulled Addison into a bear hug, poking her lightly in the side. "Shut up."
"What?" Addison turned to Arizona, clearly enjoying the opportunity to tease Callie. "You know what you've done to her, right? The way she goes all gooey every time we talk about you? Totally uncharacteristic, but very adorable."
Surprised by the heat suffusing her cheeks at Addison's very true words, Callie peeked at Arizona for a reaction. Before she had glowed. Now her happiness lit up the room.
"Makes sense." Showing off her dimples, Arizona shrugged. "I am pretty cool."
"And modest," Callie said.
"That too." Arizona reached for Callie's hand and gave her a quick squeeze.
Callie knew what that meant-I love you. She squeezed back. Then she gestured to the chair on her other side. "Anyway, sit down."
"With pleasure." Addison collapsed into the chair next to Callie and exhaled. "It's been a brutal day, but nothing a cocktail won't cure."
Arizona straightened, gesturing at someone behind Addison. Teddy strode over to their table, fire in her eyes. She dropped her purse in the empty chair and said flatly, "Men suck."
"I'll drink to that." Addison turned and extended her hand. "Addison Montgomery. You're speaking my language."
"Teddy Altman." Giving her a brief shake, Teddy managed a warm smile. "I'm buying the first round. What does everyone want?"
"I'll stick to water," Callie said. She wanted to keep a clear head for Arizona tonight.
"Margarita for me." Addison released Teddy's hand. "And it's a pleasure to meet you."
Arizona pushed back her chair and hopped to her feet. "I'll go with you, Teddy. For moral support."
Callie watched Arizona walk away, already missing the faint warmth of her body at her side. Never had she felt such a visceral connection to another human being, the constant desire to be close. Aware that her longing had to be written all over her face, Callie wasn't surprised when Addison confirmed it with a low chuckle.
"Callie Torres, you really are stupid, head over heels in love. Aren't you?"
Impressed by the way Arizona had Teddy relaxed and giggling by the time they reached the bar, apparently free from her dark mood, Callie shrugged helplessly. There was no denying it. Not that she wanted to. "Yes."
"She looks great." Addison gave Callie a cautious once-over. "You both do, actually. Way better than just the 'okay' I heard about yesterday."
"Thanks." Flicking her gaze back to Arizona, Callie paused as Teddy reacted to something whispered in her ear with a genuine grin and an excited hug. Callie suspected that Arizona had just shared the news of their breakthrough the night before, and decided it was safe for her to do the same. "We've had a good day. And an excellent last night."
Addison shot her an approving look. "Does that mean you finally went all the way?"
Callie met Addison's gaze, wanting desperately to play it cool but fully aware that it wasn't an option. She was too happy to be cool. "Oh, yeah."
"And to think, twenty-four hours ago you were still just working toward it."
"Amazing, the difference a day makes." Callie returned her attention to the bar, where Arizona now sat on a stool alone. Slightly alarmed, Callie scanned the room until she spotted Teddy heading into the bathroom. "Arizona had coffee with his first victim yesterday morning. It really seemed to help her somehow."
"I'm sure it's a comfort not to feel like she's going into this trial alone. Knowing that someone else is facing the same experience she is…"
"Yeah." Callie frowned as a tall, dark-haired man sidled up to the bar next to Arizona as she waited for Joe to mix their drinks. She studied Arizona's body language when the man bent and said something close to her ear. His intentions were easy enough to read-charm cranked to the max, he flirted with predatory determination. Arizona stiffened slightly and leaned away from him, but responded to his come-on with good-natured ease. Frustrated, Callie muttered, "Why would Teddy leave her alone like that?"
Addison glanced over her shoulder. "Because Arizona is a grown woman?"
"Yeah, a grown, beautiful woman who doesn't need every creep in this place hitting on her." Seemingly undeterred, the man laughed and tried another line. Callie tensed, worried how Arizona would react to the man's persistent interest. If he didn't back off in approximately two seconds, Callie feared she would lose her battle not to intervene. "He's making her uncomfortable."
"Cal, honestly, it looks like she's handling herself just fine."
Callie took a deep breath and forced herself to relax. Every instinct in her body told her to jump up and go to Arizona, to get between her and that man, to give him a piece of her mind, but she knew exactly what would happen if she did. Arizona would accuse her of being overprotective again. And she would be right.
Exhaling slowly, Callie uncurled the hands she had balled into fists. Overreacting would be a huge mistake. She knew that. "Of course she is."
As though proving her point, Arizona gave the man a friendly wave and sent him on his way. Judging from the smile on his face as he stumbled back to his table, Arizona had delivered a rejection full of her typical warmth and humor. Not for the first time, Callie's chest swelled with fierce pride for her partner.
"See?" Addison gentled her tone. "She's all right."
Callie shook her head and laced her fingers on the tabletop, wishing she had that glass of water. She had just come this close to fucking up, and it was probably only Addison's presence that had stopped her from ruining their very good day. "Mierda," Callie muttered. "Thank you for being a voice of reason."
"Hey." Addison reached across the table, touching Callie's arm. "Don't beat yourself up. You're just looking out for her."
"Apparently too much." At Addison's questioning expression, Callie said, "I'm having a hard time not leaping to her defense every time someone even looks at her funny."
"And that's causing problems."
"A little bit." Callie shook her head at Addison's knowing smile. "I can be overprotective. Impulsive." She relaxed at the sight of Teddy strolling out of the bathroom. "I'm trying to rein it in. Arizona is still the strong, capable woman she's always been. And I need to remember that. I owe it to her to remember."
Addison's face softened. "You're a good partner, Callie. And if the way she looks at you is any indication, she thinks the same. I wouldn't worry too much."
Callie looked back to the bar and caught Arizona's gaze over Addison's shoulder, relieved to see her just as sunny and cheerful as she had been when they arrived. Slowly Callie relaxed, and by the time Arizona and Teddy returned with their drinks, she decided she was doing a pretty good impression of carefree. Arizona placed a glass of water on the table in front of Callie, leaning in for a quick kiss before she sat down.
"You okay?" Arizona whispered.
Clearly her version of carefree still needed some polish. Callie pushed aside the last of her lingering unease and snaked an arm around Arizona's middle. Determined not to darken their evening, Callie nuzzled Arizona's neck, inhaling deeply. "I'm wonderful."
Arizona shivered. "Me too."
Teddy sat down and immediately knocked back a healthy swallow of beer. "So I'm honestly starting to think that there may be something to the whole lesbian thing." She regarded Callie and Arizona with a mixture of curiosity and amusement. "You two make it look so easy."
"I think that's because they're made for each other," Addison said, taking a dainty sip of her cocktail. "The lesbian thing is just incidental."
"Well, either way." Teddy planted her elbow on the table and propped her head on her hand, looking wistful. "Men suck, and you guys make me insanely jealous."
Arizona turned an absolutely darling shade of pink, but managed a cheeky grin. "Trust me, I've been with a lot of women. This is a Calliope thing, not a girl thing."
"A lot of women?" Tickled by Arizona's obvious pride in that statement, Callie said, "Exactly how many are we talking about?"
"Just enough to know how lucky I am to have snagged you."
"Good answer." Eager for a change in subject, Callie looked at Teddy. "So why do men suck this time?"
Teddy shook her head, still staring at Arizona. "Wait a minute, I'm stuck back at that 'been with a lot of women' thing. Are we talking like a female Mark Sloan here, or-"
"Mark?" Arizona wrinkled her nose. "He should aspire to be the male Arizona Robbins. Anything Mark Sloan can do, I can do better."
"Don't tell him I said this, but that's true," Callie interjected. "No contest."
Laughter erupted from Mark's former bedmates, and Arizona sipped at her wine with a cocky air of assurance. "Obviously."
A cheer arose from a group of men at the bar, drawing Callie's attention to the television mounted in the corner of the room. A college football game played silently on screen, and a fourth quarter touchdown had energized the small cluster of sports fans that were paying attention. As Callie watched, the picture flipped from a shot of a celebrating player to the local news anchor, who wore a serious expression as she reported something Callie couldn't hear.
But the large white letters at the bottom of the screen instantly caught her attention. SUSPECT CHARGED IN SERIAL RAPE CASE. Callie's throat seized as the image on-screen changed to a shot of Seattle Grace Mercy West, taken from the same parking lot where Arizona had been attacked.
Callie tore her eyes away, praying that Arizona hadn't followed her gaze. Her heart crashed into the pit of her stomach at the sight of Arizona, no longer smiling, face gone pale, staring at the screen with an expression of absolute dread. When genuine fear then anger flashed in her eyes, Callie instinctively looked back at the television. Her stomach twisted at the sight of Colin Thomas flanked by men in suits and ties on the courthouse steps, being pushed past the camera in a wheelchair.
This was the first time Arizona had seen his face, Callie realized, and reached for her just as Arizona pushed back from the table. "I'm sorry, I need to go to the restroom."
Having fallen silent, Teddy and Addison both nodded soberly. Callie just froze, uncertain what she should say or do. As Arizona rushed away from the table, head down, Callie glanced around the room, stricken to see a couple of vaguely familiar hospital employees staring after her. She hoped Arizona didn't notice-it would only make things worse. Just as Callie had that thought, Arizona lifted her head and looked around the bar. Then she picked up speed and disappeared into the ladies room.
"If you're wondering whether it's overprotective to go after her, I vote no." Addison touched Callie's hand, wrenching her out of her momentary paralysis. "You should make sure she's okay."
"Yes." Teddy blinked rapidly, obviously holding back her emotion. "Go."
Callie stood on numb legs. "I can't believe that just happened. Today, of all days."
"Go make her smile," Addison said quietly.
"Please." Teddy gave Callie an encouraging nod. "We all know you can do it."
Callie wished she had as much faith in her abilities. She hurried to the bathroom even though she wasn't sure what she would say when she got there. All she knew was that Arizona was hurting, and she needed to do whatever she could to take away her pain.
When Callie entered the restroom, Arizona was standing at the sink, splashing water onto her face. She looked up and met Callie's gaze in the mirror, then tore off a square of paper towel to dry her eyes. "Hey."
Struck by the juxtaposition of their first meeting in this very place, Callie offered a genuine smile. "Does the line form here?"
Arizona laughed, a tired sound. She turned around and leaned against the sink, folding her arms over her chest. "You are the line."
Callie took a cautious step forward. "Are you okay?"
Arizona nodded, then shrugged. Then she stared down at the floor with shining eyes. "I'm sorry. I don't want to ruin girls' night."
"You're not. Everyone understands."
Biting her lip, Arizona murmured, "He looks like a nice enough guy, doesn't he?" She lifted her face, focusing on a spot just over Callie's shoulder. "After what he did to me, I thought I would recognize him somehow. But I don't."
"It was dark," Callie said softly. This was a conversation they'd had before.
"I know." Arizona met Callie's eyes. Then she opened her arms. "Come here and hug me."
Relieved, Callie crossed the room in three strides, gathering Arizona in a warm embrace. Arizona buried her face in Callie's shoulder and exhaled deeply.
"I'm really trying to hold on to my good day." Arizona drew her fingernails down the back of Callie's neck, unleashing a shiver that raised the flesh on Callie's arms.
Callie gave Arizona a gentle squeeze. "Tell me how I can help."
"You're already helping." Arizona managed a smile that only hinted at her dimples. "Remember our first kiss? Well, sorta kiss?"
"Right on this very spot." Callie let her arousal at the memory come to the front. "Only the second woman to ever kiss me, and she was gorgeous, with these breathtaking blue eyes and this magic smile. I won't lie, I went straight home and spent a little quality time with my hand and my imagination."
Arizona laughed. "You never told me that before."
"Are you surprised?"
"Actually, no." Arizona traced her finger along the curve of Callie's jaw. "But I am intrigued."
"I can recreate the event for you sometime. If you want."
That elicited a genuine smile. "How about I help you recreate the first part right now?" Arizona murmured, then grabbed the labels of Callie's leather jacket and brought their mouths together in a firm kiss.
Callie allowed Arizona to set the pace, but unlike that first time, she kissed back. Encouraged by the way Arizona pulled her closer, Callie dipped her tongue into Arizona's mouth, picking up the faint taste of white wine. Cradling her face tenderly, Callie put every ounce of the love she felt into their joining. That first kiss had been about attraction-this one was a promise, an affirmation.
The bathroom door opened behind them, and for the second time that evening, the sound of a throat clearing broke them apart. Callie glanced at the mirror over Arizona's shoulder, chuckling at the sight of Lexie Grey all bright-red and sheepish.
"I must have some kind of sonar when it comes to interrupting you two." Lexie looked like she wouldn't have minded getting sucked into the floor. "Sorry."
Arizona wiggled her way out of Callie's arms. "Our fault. This one's a public bathroom, after all."
Lexie smiled and hurried into the closest stall, effectively ending the conversation. Blushing, Arizona gestured for Callie to follow her to the door, but Callie stopped her with a hand on her wrist. Bringing her mouth to Arizona's ear, she whispered, "Do you want to go home?"
Arizona squeezed Callie's bicep. "No." She also kept her voice low, so Lexie wouldn't overhear. "I want to have fun. I want to get back to girls' night. And when we do go home after we're done having fun, I want you to make love to me again. Because that's exactly how a good day should end."
Callie couldn't argue with that. "Then let's go have fun."
#
Two hours later, Arizona dragged Callie into her apartment and slammed her up against the wall, devouring her in a hungry kiss. Despite the fact that Arizona's hands had roamed her body during the entire drive home, wrecking her concentration, Callie startled at the sudden explosion of passion. Arizona hadn't exactly kept her desire to make love tonight a secret, but Callie never expected such wild, urgent need at the end of their slightly bumpy evening.
As soon as they had left the bathroom at Joe's, Arizona jumped back into her good mood with a vengeance. She chattered with Teddy and Addison as though she didn't have a care in the world, laughing easily and often, to the point where Callie honestly believed she had managed to overcome the shock of seeing that newscast, and her rapist's face. But Callie had sensed Arizona's thoughts drifting during a couple of quiet moments, and knew the trial was never far from her mind.
Callie had no idea where Arizona's thoughts were now, as her hands cradled Callie's breasts and her mouth sucked eagerly on the tender skin where Callie's neck met her shoulder. As good as it felt, Callie couldn't shake her anxiety about totally abandoning herself to their foreplay.
One wrong move tonight could throw Arizona into a tailspin. Their good day meant everything to her right now, Callie knew that, and more than anything she wanted to protect them both from any more trauma. So she returned the passionate kisses but held back, refusing to match the physical intensity of Arizona's seduction. Wanting Arizona to feel in control and powerful, Callie decided to be wholly submissive.
Easing out of a particularly rough kiss, Callie gripped Arizona's upper arms and turned them around so Arizona's back pressed against the wall. Then she sank to her knees, meeting Arizona's heated stare with a playful smile. She brought her hands to the button on Arizona's pants, working it open with exaggerated care, then unzipped and lowered them slowly to the ground.
Arizona wore lavender panties and smelled delicious. Resting her head on the wall, she grinned broadly and twisted a hand in Callie's hair. "What are you doing?"
Knowing how much Arizona loved dirty talk, Callie murmured, "Getting ready to suck you off."
A quiet, indrawn breath, then Arizona groaned and lowered a hand to caress Callie's cheek. "Then get to it."
Callie hooked her thumbs in the waist of Arizona's panties and tugged them down to her ankles, then helped her step out. A trill of anticipation crawled up her spine at Arizona's visible arousal so close to her mouth. Looking up, she made eye contact as she carefully lifted Arizona's leg and hooked it over her shoulder. Then she brought her face close to Arizona's pussy and inhaled.
Arizona tilted her hips and tightened her fingers in Callie's hair. "Let me feel your tongue, Calliope."
Callie covered Arizona with her mouth, laving her tongue over impossibly hot, swollen folds. She tasted sweet and light, a flavor distinctly Arizona. There was no better taste in the world.
Arizona brought her other hand to caress Callie's jaw, holding her close. "Oh, God. That's it. Good girl."
Delighted by the quaver in Arizona's voice, Callie dipped her tongue lower and lapped gently at Arizona's opening, then kissed her way up to her erect clit. Sucking lightly, she tightened her grip on Arizona when her legs shook and threatened to give out.
Callie drew back. "Should we move this to the bedroom, let you lie down?"
Arizona shook her head. "No. I like having you on your knees."
"Okay." Pressing forward, Callie held Arizona firmly against the wall and licked up her length. Then once more, until the shaking returned. Callie closed her eyes, concentrating on the way Arizona's body twitched and trembled at every purposeful stroke. As subservient as she might be in this position, Callie would be lying if she said she didn't feel damn powerful, too.
Arizona tugged gently on Callie's hair. "Stop."
Immediately Callie pulled away, looking up at Arizona in concern. "Everything okay?"
"Oh. Yes." Yet another appearance of Arizona's dimples, this time sending a jolt of need deep into Callie's belly. "Take off your shirt. Please."
"Really?"
Arizona released Callie's head and lowered her leg so both feet were planted firmly on the ground. "Really. Show me your breasts."
Callie shivered at the unselfconscious request. "Okay." She shrugged off her jacket, then yanked her T-shirt over her head. Hesitating only an instant, she reached behind her back and unhooked her bra. The desire on Arizona's face warmed Callie, injecting her with renewed confidence. "Is this what you wanted?" Callie tossed her bra on the ground and threw back her shoulders.
"Touch them." Arizona's low, throaty voice made Callie's heart beat faster. "Play with your nipples."
Back when she first met Arizona, Callie could never have imagined those words coming out of her mouth. That the sweet, enthusiastic blonde with the Heelys and the fairy dust would be so sexually confident never occurred to Callie-and when she first discovered how fucking sexy Arizona actually was, it was like winning the lottery. The impossibly hot pediatric surgeon jackpot.
For months now Callie had wondered whether Arizona would be able to keep that part of herself intact. To see her familiar self-confidence emerge now, to bear witness to Arizona's reclamation of her kinky side, almost brought Callie to tears. Aware that crying would ruin a very exciting moment, she reined in her emotion and did exactly as Arizona commanded.
Bringing her hands up to cup her breasts, Callie tried and failed to suppress a snicker at the sight of Arizona's glassy-eyed stupor. "So predictable."
"So what?" Arizona bit her lip, rapt as Callie rolled and tugged her tight nipples between her fingertips. "Are you complaining?"
"Not at all." Callie let her mouth fall open as she pinched her nipples sharply, exhaling with a quiet whimper. "Is this doing it for you?"
Arizona reached for the back of Callie's head, tugging her forward until her mouth brushed against slick, trimmed hairs. "Get back to work, Calliope."
She stopped touching herself just long enough to reposition Arizona's leg over her shoulder, and to brace her against the wall, and then she gave Arizona a deep kiss that she hoped conveyed everything she was feeling. Surrounded by Arizona-her taste, her scent, the little noises she made when just the right suction was applied to her clit-Callie turned off her brain and enjoyed the simple act of giving Arizona pleasure.
"You're going to make me come." Arizona moaned and tangled her fingers in Callie's hair. "I'm going to come in your mouth, baby. You want that?"
Callie nodded vigorously. Hearing Arizona say the words was nearly as good as feeling her climax. Nearly. Increasing the speed of her tongue over Arizona's clit, then sucking hard, it took all of Callie's willpower not to fist pump in victory when Arizona angled her hips and cried out. She pulsed and contracted beneath Callie's tongue, pressing hard into her mouth, and rode the wave of her release until she sagged against the wall.
"Oh my God," Arizona gasped, pushing weakly against Callie's forehead. "Stop. I need to breathe."
Satisfied, Callie released Arizona and sat back on her haunches, grinning. "And that's why I'm the best."
Arizona snorted and shook her head. "No, it's not."
Only slightly affronted, Callie said, "Gee, thanks."
"Shut up." Arizona sank to the floor and crawled into Callie's waiting arms. "You're the best for much more substantial reasons. The oral mastery is just an awesome bonus."
Snickering, Callie pressed her nose into Arizona's hair and inhaled. "Should we go to bed now?"
"Yes." Arizona snuggled closer.
"Okay." Splaying her hand between Arizona's shoulder blades, Callie held her for a moment more before forcing herself to her feet.
The walk to the bedroom was quiet but comfortable. They had been together long enough that Callie no longer needed to chase away silence with words, and could instead simply appreciate being with Arizona, sharing her space. Breathing the same air.
Inside the bedroom, Callie walked to her side of the bed as Arizona moved to put away her watch in her nightstand drawer. Then Arizona looked across the mattress that separated them, making eye contact before starting to unbutton her shirt. Callie held her gaze and stripped off her pants. Her own shirt was lying on the foyer floor, with Arizona's pants.
Callie heated at the memory of Arizona telling her to undress. "That was some really hot sex."
"Agreed." Arizona shrugged out of her bra, tossing it to the floor. A sure sign she was tired-Arizona was usually a stickler when it came to putting dirty clothes in the hamper. "I've been wanting to do that all night."
"Me too." Callie peeled off her panties, all too aware of her own gnawing, aching need. Watching a very beautiful, very naked Arizona crawl beneath the comforter did nothing to ease her desire. "You're so sexy. I almost passed out, listening to you talk like that."
Arizona propped up her head, elbow planted on her pillow. "Get in bed and I'll do more than talk to you." Callie whimpered as her pussy clenched at Arizona's seductive pose. With a knowing smile, Arizona lifted the comforter in invitation. "Don't make me wait."
"Never." Callie slipped into bed and immediately Arizona moved so their upper bodies touched, breasts pressed together, and kissed her so lovingly that Callie struggled not to get swept away and shed her restraint. Gently, she stroked her fingertips up and down Arizona's bare back, trying to convey her longing without losing control.
Arizona drew back, eyes cloudy with desire. "Spread your legs."
Callie got wetter at the whispered command, and let her legs fall open on the mattress. She stayed perfectly still as Arizona skimmed a hand between her thighs, bowstring taut with anticipation. Elegant fingers found and parted her labia in an instant, dipping low then expertly dragging slick juices up to coat her painfully swollen clit. Callie closed her eyes and swallowed, biting her lip at the wave of burning pleasure that Arizona unleashed with a single touch.
"Open your eyes." Soft lips brushed against Callie's cheek, startling her into instant obedience. "Watch me while I make you feel good."
Callie tightened her jaw, forcing away the climax that threatened to crash over her at Arizona's quiet confidence. There was no bigger turn-on. "Okay."
Arizona swirled her fingertips around Callie's clit, then moved down to play at her opening. Callie lifted her hips, but Arizona wouldn't allow herself to be drawn inside. Her touch kept Callie poised at the razor edge of satisfaction, ratcheting up the tension to an almost unbearable level. Everything she did felt incredible, but none of it was enough to get Callie off.
"I just want to play for a while," Arizona murmured. She used her free hand to brush a lock of hair away from Callie's eyes. "I promise I'll make you come."
Exhaling shakily, Callie said, "I know you will." Before Arizona, Callie hadn't been a particularly big fan of hand jobs. Mostly because she hadn't met many men who had enough finesse to pull them off. But Arizona was masterful with her hands, and Callie loved nothing more than putting herself at their mercy. "You always do."
Arizona smiled and lowered her head to Callie's breast, licking a slow circle around her nipple. Callie swore under her breath, legs quivering, as she nearly came right then and there. Sharp teeth closed down on her sensitive flesh, drawing Callie's attention to Arizona's admonishing look. It took all of Callie's strength not to climax as Arizona's hand continued its caresses-only the need to do as Arizona said kept her from losing her tight hold on her control.
Callie touched Arizona's hair and held her gaze. She gritted her teeth at the overwhelming sensitivity of her aroused clit, then groaned loudly when Arizona stopped touching it. She opened her mouth to protest, but cut off her words when Arizona entered her in one smooth, firm thrust. Her thumb landed on Callie's clit again and she whispered, "Let go, Calliope. Now," just as Callie lost any choice in the matter.
Arching her back, Callie cried out and slammed her eyes shut as her orgasm ripped through her body. She reached between her legs and gripped Arizona's wrist to make sure she wouldn't withdraw before Callie was ready. She yearned to experience every bit of the pleasure Arizona was giving her-she never wanted it to end.
Until she did. Dangerously short of breath, Callie finally conceded defeat. Murmuring for Arizona to stop, Callie pulled her fingers out of her pussy and guided her hand to rest on her stomach. Arizona muttered her quiet disappointment, but rested her head on Callie's shoulder and allowed her a minute to recover before speaking.
"You're so beautiful when you come." Arizona smoothed her hand over Callie's bare hip, pulling her closer. "I love watching your face. You are quite literally the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen, so to see your face alive with pleasure…that I've given you…well…" She trailed off, as though realizing she was rambling. "Anyway, thank you for that."
Callie gave her a careful squeeze. "Good day, huh?"
"Epic day," Arizona echoed. She sounded exhausted all of a sudden. "And I'm wiped out."
"Excellent." Sleep still didn't come easily for Arizona-at least not peaceful, undisturbed rest, the quality kind-and Callie hoped this meant Arizona would have a dreamless night. Since Colin Thomas's arrest, her nightmares were more frequent, as bad as they had been in two months. No matter how well Arizona coped during the day, Callie knew not having an escape at night would wear her down eventually.
And she desperately didn't want that to happen.
Callie kissed Arizona's cheek, amazed at the way her breathing deepened and evened out so quickly. By the time Callie turned off the lamp on her nightstand and gathered Arizona into her arms, she was asleep.
It had been a good day. Callie promised herself that tomorrow would be even better.
#
Sometime in the middle of the night, Arizona's hand caught Callie across the face as she thrashed around on the mattress. The blow brought Callie into awareness with a gasp, though it took her a moment to get her bearings. Once she realized that Arizona had struck her, and that she was still twisting and turning in silent torment, Callie prepared to wake her.
"No," Arizona whimpered before Callie could touch her. "Stop, please stop. No." She choked out a sob, then jerked awake screaming. Sitting up, she focused on Callie, saw her outstretched hand, and flinched away. "No, don't touch me. Don't fucking touch me."
Startled, Callie drew away. The knowledge that the nightmare still had Arizona in its grip, that she remained a prisoner of her memory of that night and was mentally working her way back to the present, eased the instinctive hurt Callie felt at the harsh words. "I won't touch you," Callie said quietly. "Nobody is going to touch you. You're safe."
Arizona inhaled, then released a shuddering breath and covered her face with her hands. Recognizing embarrassment, Callie rushed to reassure her.
"That sounded like a bad one." Though Callie yearned to reach for her, she kept her distance. She wouldn't move until Arizona gave her permission. "I'm sorry."
Shoulders shaking, Arizona uncovered her tear-stained face and collapsed into Callie's arms. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't want to do this tonight."
"It's not like you can control it." Callie held her tight, saddened by the wild thrum of Arizona's heartbeat against her chest. Like a terrified animal. "Don't ever apologize for this."
"I'm so tired." And indeed, Arizona sounded worn out. "I just want to sleep. Like a normal person. I want to sleep through the night and feel refreshed in the morning."
Callie eased them back onto the mattress. Sensing that physical contact would be welcome now, Callie tugged Arizona on top of her and wrapped her in an intimate, full-body hug. Skin damp with sweat, Arizona shivered and cuddled closer. Callie stroked her hands over Arizona's back, tentatively, until she felt Arizona begin to relax.
"You are a normal person." Callie stopped the motion of her hands, holding Arizona close as she whispered in her ear. "One with a lot on her mind. There's no shame in that."
Arizona sniffed, sending a tear trickling down Callie's shoulder. "I hate him."
"So do I."
"When I saw him on TV tonight, at first I was scared. Then I just wanted to kill him. Violently. With my own hands." Arizona paused to clear her throat, but she was hoarse when she spoke again. "I don't want to feel this anymore. Any of it. I want to be me again."
Not knowing what to say, Callie kissed Arizona's temple, then caressed her bare back again. The pain in Arizona's voice broke her heart. She wished she had some magic words that would reassure Arizona that her darkness was temporary, that it would go away once the trial was over, but she didn't know that. And Arizona wouldn't believe it, anyway.
"I really was happy today," Arizona whispered brokenly. "I don't know why I had a bad dream."
Callie's vision blurred as tears stung her eyes. She was glad Arizona couldn't see her face, because lack of sleep made staying strong impossible. Though she would never admit it out loud, seeing Arizona struggle like this was the most difficult thing in the world. Which made Callie want to kill Colin Thomas, too, but saying that wouldn't lighten Arizona's mood. And that was her job in these moments-to make Arizona feel better.
Grasping for something that might raise Arizona's spirits, Callie said, "So where do you want to go first, in Spain?"
She could feel Arizona's struggle to shove aside her sadness and latch on to the optimism of planning their vacation. After the span of a few measured breaths, Arizona said, "Barcelona."
"I can't wait."
Arizona inhaled shakily, raising up on elbows planted beside Callie's head. "Then Alicante."
"Sounds like you've been thinking about this a little."
Arizona managed a small smile. "A little, yes."
Callie brought her hands up to tickle circles over Arizona's shoulder blades. "I haven't taken a real vacation...well, since my father stopped paying for my ticket."
"Well, I promise this will be a very grown-up trip. A little drinking, lots of ogling you on the beach." As Callie hoped, talking about their trip seemed to be helping. The shadow over Arizona's face vanished, replaced by rising excitement. "And I want to explore every city we visit. Get lost in them. Have adventures."
Callie wasn't strictly an adventure girl, but somehow the thought of having one with Arizona was enormously appealing. Warmed by Arizona's excitement, she stroked the back of her fingers over her face. "I love you."
"I love you, too." Sobering slightly, Arizona said, "I see what you did there, you know."
"Oh?"
Arizona rubbed her thumb along Callie's eyebrow. "Thank you. I know I haven't been much fun to be with lately, but you're a trooper."
Callie rolled her eyes. "Shut up, dummy."
That elicited a pleased laugh. "Nice."
"I love being with you. Period. End of discussion."
"Okay." Arizona tugged a lock of Callie's hair fondly. "But thank you, anyway."
Callie nodded. "Hang in there, okay? You're gonna come out the other side of this thing better than ever. I know it."
"I hope so." Arizona pressed a chaste kiss to Callie's lips, then rolled off to the side, settling on her back. "Sorry I woke you up. I know you have surgery in the morning."
Callie glanced at the clock. Three in the morning. They could still catch a few more hours of much-needed rest. "Do you think you can go back to sleep?"
Hesitating so briefly Callie almost missed it, Arizona gave her a lackluster smile. Partial dimples. "Sure, of course. Good night."
On the other hand, sleep wasn't nearly as important as making sure Arizona felt safe and secure. Callie glanced over at Arizona, who stared at the ceiling with quiet intensity. Then Callie wrinkled her nose and sniffed.
"We smell like sex." Callie shifted closer and brushed her lips against Arizona's neck, inhaling. "Especially you."
Arizona gave her a playful slap. "Be quiet."
"Seriously." Callie ran her hand down Arizona's arm, then entangled their fingers. "And you're a little sweaty."
Snorting, Arizona said, "Sweet talker."
"I'm just saying."
"Well…" Arizona's voice carried tentative hope. "Do you want to take a bath? It doesn't have to be a long one. We could just sit in some hot water for a few minutes."
"Sold."
That earned her a full-on grin. Nothing had ever looked so beautiful. "Thanks, Calliope."
Yeah, Callie decided, sleep could wait.
To be continued…