Comments | ficinabottle: Three Five Acts ficlets

valhalla37 in ficinabottle

Three Five Acts ficlets

Sep 24, 2010 20:42

Title: Terrible love
Characters/Pairings: Charlotte/Daniel
Rating: Hard PG-13/soft R
Summary: She doesn't mean for anything to happen with her and Dan.
Spoilers/Warnings: Up to 5x05; references to character death.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
A/N: Written for primarycolors92 for the Five Acts meme, for the prompts mistake sex and outdoors. Title from The National.

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( Even though she knows he loves her )

aaron, charlotte, jack, jack/kate, daniel/charlotte, miles, daniel, juliet

Comments 4

pann_cake September 25 2010, 04:40:11 UTC

Ok, I loved all of these. :P They all seem totally plausible! Dan and Charlotte are so perfect and heartbreaking. You write her so well, and poor Dan. :(

Kate and Jack are so great, I love the ending. The last two sentences are so amazing, I don't know how you do it.

I think the middle one was my favorite because it had MILES. :DD I can totally see them hooking up a little until Jim stakes his claim, lol. And Juliet is just so funny, don't let it go to your head. She would so say that.

:DD

valhalla37 September 27 2010, 01:09:38 UTC

Thank you so, so much! I adore writing Charlotte; I'm so pleased you thought her perspective worked.

And yay! I love writing Kate/Jack but I only do it about once a year on average, so I'm never sure how it turns out.

Hee, the Miles/Juliet was so much fun to write; I love their dynamic on the show, and I figure they could have had a little something because Sawyer came into the picture.

Thanks again for your lovely feedback!

squeakyboots September 26 2010, 04:09:35 UTC

Oh, wow: Terrible Love was so beautiful. I adore what you do with Charlotte here and elsewhere: she feels like such a full character in your hands, and so true to what we got on the show at the same time, that it's sort of breathtaking. Reading this was like taking a peek at what she could have been, if the writers had had any kind of investment in her character.

And there were so many great lines that I don't know which to quote, but this:

He looks at her for a long moment, like he can't quite figure out what she's up to (and it's nothing, honestly; there's no time -- again, she can't escape it -- to think about Dan's words to that Alpert bloke in the Hostiles' camp, about why repeating it back made her breath sort of skip, made all kinds of things she doesn't even want to start picking apart swell, warm and bright, in her chest)...This was my favorite. Dan's reaction here, that he knows (even if he doesn't quite know ( ... )

valhalla37 September 27 2010, 01:15:12 UTC

Thank you so, so, so much for the wonderful feedback! She's my absolute favourite to write, so I'm so flattered you think so! I feel like she has so much wasted potential in canon, which is probably one reason why I like using her in fic so much; I feel like she ended up a plot point instead of, as you said, a full character, and I try to rectify that a little bit when I write her. ;D

Aww, yay! I'm so pleased you thought that worked! I feel like balancing any sort of emotional reaction from Charlotte is sometimes tricky in terms of making it believable, so I really appreciate that. And hee, I'm really glad you think I pulled it off, because I so rarely write anything with an R. So thanks again, for everything!