You're Not Gay - Part 1
Title: You're Not Gay
Author: fiar22
Rating: pg-13
Genre: angst, romance, ?denial?, humor
Summary: If you asked Lee Taemin if he was gay, he'd probably just stare at you. He would rather die that unveil the secret that changed his whole life. However, if you asked Kim Jonghyun the same question, you'd probably wake up in his bed the next morning (regardless of gender). Two very different lifestyles that eventually collide.
Author's notes: I just wrote this and omg. I think I like it. I haven't read over it, but I think I like it. I need a break from "Candles" and had this crazy idea and this is the first story I've actually had a plan for and I think it might be good eventually. This is really just a little peek into the past to catch everyone up to where the two main characters currently are. OMG I DON'T EVEN KNOW. OMG. WHYYYY love it. please.
“My life is probably over,” Taemin thought this over and over again.
Lee Taemin lay on his bed, face down, trying to forget he was a living being. There were sounds of birds chirping outside and, if you were listening close enough, children could be heard screaming from off in the distance. The neighborhood the Lee family lived in was the perfect place for a well-rounded, normal family. Actually, it would be more accurate to say the neighborhood they just moved into.
To be perfectly honest, which was definitely not allowed in the Lee household, Taemin hated it. He’d lived in the same place his whole life up until this point. He’d always known the same people and had the same friends and ended up kissing the same guy he’d been dreaming about for fifteen years of his existence. So, for Taemin, this change was huge, life-altering, and completely irritating on so many levels.
“Taemin, get off your ass and start unpacking, now,” A women, also known as Taemin’s mother, instructed in a tone he’d come to know over the past month. He probably hated her, and probably was probably an understatement, but she was his mother, and thus he obeyed.
To fully understand the situation, you’d have to take a time machine to about a month ago when Taemin finally had his first kiss. When he had finally kissed Choi Minho. Yes, he had kissed The Choi Minho, or rather, Minho had kissed him, but it was a kiss nonetheless and Taemin had been in heaven for exactly twenty-four hours before it all came tumbling down.
The kiss was probably a life changing experience. It was definitely something Taemin would never forget. To regular eyes, the kiss wouldn’t seem special, because the facts of life are that best friends end up kissing all the time, right? However, Taemin felt all the fiery passion of fifteen years built into one kiss that told him Minho may have been feeling the same way he had all along, but neither of them had the courage to tell each other until that point. It seemed like everything would suddenly become perfect after that kiss. Yes, it seemed that way.
That was, until that conniving, slutty-bimbo bitch (just a few words Taemin liked to use himself) Yuri had spotted them under the bleachers, and in all of her jealousy (trying to jump on Minho’s cock since the day he turned twelve) took pictures and posted it around to immediately out the two boys of their newly found secret. Though, school didn’t concern either of them a bit. If they were gay, then they were gay. People already suspected a weird tension between the two inseparable friends, so it was really just reinforcing what everyone else already knew. Choi Minho and Lee Taemin were gay. For each other mostly, but gay nonetheless.
“Yes,” Taemin thought, “If that was the end of the story, that would be fine.” However, it wasn’t the end of the story, not even close.
When Taemin got home the day after the kiss, everything seemed normal. He’d just gone up to his room to do his homework as quickly as possible because Minho might want to hang out later and he didn’t want anything to hold him back. He sat down at his desk and immediately pulled out a small stack of homework, plus some books, and began jot down answers.
Before getting too far, his brother Jinki poked his head inside. Taemin tried to ignore him, but Jinki didn’t go away, so Taemin looked up to see what he wanted. “I heard you’re a queer now,” he said point-blank.
Taemin blinked a couple times before saying, “Yup,” and returning to his work. He thought he might have heard his brother say something like ‘i’m telling mom’ in his fit of laughter, but he really didn’t care because Jinki was an asshole.
And if that was the end of it, Taemin would have thanked god a hundred times over, but let’s face it: bad things happen to good people.
When Taemin heard the front door open and close, he knew his mom was home. When Taemin heard Jinki’s door open and close, he knew Jinki was running down to tell his mom (if he remembered) or ask for something he probably wasn’t going to get. When Taemin heard a loud knock on his door and then “Taemin,” from the other side, he knew there was something to worry about.
Eventually, he found himself sitting on the living room couch, watching his mother pace back and forth in a worrying fashion. She wasn’t worried, she was fuming, but that made Taemin worried. He could see Jinki sitting at the top of the stairs, trembling in anticipation for what would come next, attempting to stifle giggles that would surely give himself away. However, his attention was brought back to his mother when she cleared her throat and said, “I don’t even know what to do with you.”
Taemin felt his stomach twirl again and again before he sucked in a breath and said, “What did I do?”
“You’re acting stupid, that’s what. I get home from work, making a living for us to survive, and Jinki tells me you kissed some boy.”
“It wasn’t just some boy, mom. It was Minho.” He realized later that this statement didn’t help his case in any sort.
“It was... what? Oh, great, it was Minho. Great. I really need Mrs. Choi to call me again and blow my ear out telling me i’m raising my children wrong. But she might be on to something because apparently my son thinks it’s okay to go around kissing boys.”
“I’m gay,” Taemin stated boldly. He looked into his mothers eyes, but he’d never felt like cowering in the corner more.
“Wha... What did you just...? You’re fifteen, you don’t know what you want and you are most definitely not gay.”
“Who are you to say?”
“You’re god-damned mother, that’s who. This isn’t funny and you aren’t gay and you’re never seeing Choi Minho again,” she shook with anger.
“You can’t do that,” Taemin yelled back, “and you’re only mad because dad was gay too. That’s why he left you.”
Her stare became no less intimidating, “You’re not gay, and we’re not staying here. We’re moving.”
Taemin just stared at her in disbelief before saying, “Like hell I am,” and he stormed out of the house.
Where did he go? Minho’s house. However, he was all but chased off of the Choi property by Mrs. Choi who had promised to never let Minho leave the house again, and most certainly would never let him see Taemin again, not after those pictures. He also vaguely heard something about ‘fag-hag mother who turned every man she saw into a homosexual’, but he wasn’t too concerned with that.
Anyway, Taemin hadn’t seen Minho since then and his last month at his old school had been filled with gay jokes and overly harsh treatment from anyone he’d ever known, family included. The worst part about it was that Taemin was forced to endure it alone, no Minho, no friends, no nothing. So, you’d think he’d be happy about moving to a new place, but he really just wanted to die. Was that so wrong to ask for?
~
Jonghyun lay shirtless on a pool raft, enjoying the sun. Mostly because that’s what players did, they enjoyed things. He was relaxing after multiple rounds of swimming back and forth practicing each stroke to a T. After all, he wasn’t the most anticipated JV athlete for nothing. Now, it was time to improve upon his tan, because although he was sporty and everyone loved him, he still needed to keep up his good looks for all the ladies and gentlemen he planned to seduce or continue to seduce.
He said ladies and gentlemen because that’s exactly what he meant, ladies and gentlemen. You could say that Jonghyun was gay, a complete and total fruit, but everyone loved him and he may have been more manly and impressive than any of the straight guys at Werner High. In fact, he wasn’t exactly gay because he did say ladies and gentlemen. The more accurate term would be bi, but Jonghyun didn’t really like labels unless they consisted of ‘studly’ and ‘iwantyou’.
In most people’s opinion at Werner High, Jonghyun was a very impressive person. That, or they were scared shitless of him, but mostly just impressed. The facts were that Jonghyun was tough. He wouldn’t take crap from anyone. Surprisingly enough, Jonghyun had already decided he was also attracted to boys when he was around the age of twelve. It hadn’t been something he fought, and it hadn’t been something he’d given long-drawn out thoughts to. It was just that one day, out of the blue to most, he decided that he wanted to ask out Lee Sungmin. To Jonghyun, this wasn’t weird at all and he did this with so much confidence, Sungmin almost felt like he couldn’t say no. Almost being the key word because he did say no, not that Jonghyun cared much, because he kept asking him every single day for three weeks until Sungmin said yes and thus began the ‘epicness’ that is Kim Jonghyun.
Now, the reason people didn’t torment Jonghyun was actually a very good reason that involved the will of wanting to live. A small few had taken a chance, out of the goodness of their hearts, and become an excellent example of why you never picked on Kim Jonghyun. After all, Jonghyun had long been involved in football, swimming, baseball, karate, and really any other sport that involved being muscly and intimidatingly strong. So, unless you really just wanted to die and needed to be put out of your misery, Jonghyun was someone you made nice with and Jonghyun was willing to make nice with everyone. Yes, a player indeed.
Because Jonghyun didn’t have to worry about the torments of every day life, he always seemed laid back and in a good mood. Nothing ever seemed to ruin his day because he was just so god-damned nice and made sure everyone around him felt good too, in whatever way possible. Yes, Jonghyun is so smooth and cool. But don’t mess with Key, or you’ll be in so much trouble.
If there was one thing that set Jonghyun off into a tizzy, it was his cousin Kim Kibum. Key could most easily be described as a girl with a penis. Now, it was true Key was technically a boy. He, in no way, shape, or form, had a vagina. It was more of the way he acted, dressed, and presented himself since he’d moved to Werner in the eighth grade. Most items in Key’s closet were short skirts and lacy, sleeveless tops. When he’d first shown up his hair was blond, with short, tight curls. Now, he had half of his head shaved in what most often looked like a mohawk-type thing. Some how, he managed to pull all of this off, looking cuter than half the girls at school, and became friends or ‘friends’ with over three-fourths of them. He was the gossip queen and a part-time hoe-bag.
This upset Jonghyun greatly because ever since he could remember Kibum was such a girl and being the eldest male in the family, he knew he needed to protect his little cousins, but girls especially because that’s just what a man should do. So, even though Kibum wasn’t technically a girl, all the feelings of protectiveness were there. Anywhere the two were spotted together, you may see Jonghyun throwing jackets, blankets, large t-shirts, and other such things over Kibum to try and conceal all the skin Key purposely showed in attempts to attract any man he could lay his eyes on. Also, it was well-known that any guy who specifically turned down Kibum’s offer to have sex or at least be given a blow-job would earn $20 from Jonghyun upon the moment he heard the news. It was that, or you went with Kibum and later ended up bleeding from your face in a dark alley, Jonghyun walking away all ‘unsuspicious’ like.
Anyway, the point was that Jonghyun had it good. Nothing was wrong and he pretty much got anything he wanted. He even had a good relationship with his parents, something that not even all straight people have. He could remember when his parents found out he’d been fooling around with dudes. It wasn’t nearly as painful as some people made it seem like it might be.
“Hey dad,” he had said one day out of the blue as he often did when he had a question. He wasn’t a shy kid by any means.
“Yeah, Jong?” he remembered his dad had been working on their car because of some reason or another.
“Is there ever times when you like people who aren’t mom?”
“Well, I like you, but I know what you’re asking. The answer is no. I married your mom because I love her and decided to love her and only her for the rest of my life.”
Jonghyun nodded as he thought about it. It seemed perfectly logical. “Okay, but before there was mom, did you like other people?”
His father chuckled a little, “S’pose I did, jong. Is there someone you like?”
Jonghyun made a thoughtful noise before answering, “Yes, but I like a lot of people. It’s not just one person.”
Again, there was a chuckle, “You have to treat ladies right, son. Remember that.”
Jonghyun’s face became a little bit questioning, “What about guys?”
His father turned toward him, putting down whatever tool he’d been holding and just looked at his son for a second. “You have a guy you like?”
“Yeah,” Jonghyun started excitedly, “He’s pretty cool. He likes things that I like. He just moved here and he hangs out with some of my other friends, so I hang out with him to. He doesn’t know I like him yet. I was thinking about saying something, but I thought I should ask you first.”
His father looked at him, as if searching for something, before he turned his attention back to the car and let out another chuckle that was just so him, “Well, son. If you like someone, you should treat them well, girl or boy.” And that was that.
His mother had acted weird at first. He assumed his father told her everything, but it didn’t faze Jonghyun. He just acted like himself, as his father always told him, and eventually his mother went back to normal. Plus, Jonghyun’s coming out was like preparation for when Kibum came to live with them in Werner a year later. Preparation, indeed.
Author: fiar22
Rating: pg-13
Genre: angst, romance, ?denial?, humor
Summary: If you asked Lee Taemin if he was gay, he'd probably just stare at you. He would rather die that unveil the secret that changed his whole life. However, if you asked Kim Jonghyun the same question, you'd probably wake up in his bed the next morning (regardless of gender). Two very different lifestyles that eventually collide.
Author's notes: I just wrote this and omg. I think I like it. I haven't read over it, but I think I like it. I need a break from "Candles" and had this crazy idea and this is the first story I've actually had a plan for and I think it might be good eventually. This is really just a little peek into the past to catch everyone up to where the two main characters currently are. OMG I DON'T EVEN KNOW. OMG. WHYYYY love it. please.
“My life is probably over,” Taemin thought this over and over again.
Lee Taemin lay on his bed, face down, trying to forget he was a living being. There were sounds of birds chirping outside and, if you were listening close enough, children could be heard screaming from off in the distance. The neighborhood the Lee family lived in was the perfect place for a well-rounded, normal family. Actually, it would be more accurate to say the neighborhood they just moved into.
To be perfectly honest, which was definitely not allowed in the Lee household, Taemin hated it. He’d lived in the same place his whole life up until this point. He’d always known the same people and had the same friends and ended up kissing the same guy he’d been dreaming about for fifteen years of his existence. So, for Taemin, this change was huge, life-altering, and completely irritating on so many levels.
“Taemin, get off your ass and start unpacking, now,” A women, also known as Taemin’s mother, instructed in a tone he’d come to know over the past month. He probably hated her, and probably was probably an understatement, but she was his mother, and thus he obeyed.
To fully understand the situation, you’d have to take a time machine to about a month ago when Taemin finally had his first kiss. When he had finally kissed Choi Minho. Yes, he had kissed The Choi Minho, or rather, Minho had kissed him, but it was a kiss nonetheless and Taemin had been in heaven for exactly twenty-four hours before it all came tumbling down.
The kiss was probably a life changing experience. It was definitely something Taemin would never forget. To regular eyes, the kiss wouldn’t seem special, because the facts of life are that best friends end up kissing all the time, right? However, Taemin felt all the fiery passion of fifteen years built into one kiss that told him Minho may have been feeling the same way he had all along, but neither of them had the courage to tell each other until that point. It seemed like everything would suddenly become perfect after that kiss. Yes, it seemed that way.
That was, until that conniving, slutty-bimbo bitch (just a few words Taemin liked to use himself) Yuri had spotted them under the bleachers, and in all of her jealousy (trying to jump on Minho’s cock since the day he turned twelve) took pictures and posted it around to immediately out the two boys of their newly found secret. Though, school didn’t concern either of them a bit. If they were gay, then they were gay. People already suspected a weird tension between the two inseparable friends, so it was really just reinforcing what everyone else already knew. Choi Minho and Lee Taemin were gay. For each other mostly, but gay nonetheless.
“Yes,” Taemin thought, “If that was the end of the story, that would be fine.” However, it wasn’t the end of the story, not even close.
When Taemin got home the day after the kiss, everything seemed normal. He’d just gone up to his room to do his homework as quickly as possible because Minho might want to hang out later and he didn’t want anything to hold him back. He sat down at his desk and immediately pulled out a small stack of homework, plus some books, and began jot down answers.
Before getting too far, his brother Jinki poked his head inside. Taemin tried to ignore him, but Jinki didn’t go away, so Taemin looked up to see what he wanted. “I heard you’re a queer now,” he said point-blank.
Taemin blinked a couple times before saying, “Yup,” and returning to his work. He thought he might have heard his brother say something like ‘i’m telling mom’ in his fit of laughter, but he really didn’t care because Jinki was an asshole.
And if that was the end of it, Taemin would have thanked god a hundred times over, but let’s face it: bad things happen to good people.
When Taemin heard the front door open and close, he knew his mom was home. When Taemin heard Jinki’s door open and close, he knew Jinki was running down to tell his mom (if he remembered) or ask for something he probably wasn’t going to get. When Taemin heard a loud knock on his door and then “Taemin,” from the other side, he knew there was something to worry about.
Eventually, he found himself sitting on the living room couch, watching his mother pace back and forth in a worrying fashion. She wasn’t worried, she was fuming, but that made Taemin worried. He could see Jinki sitting at the top of the stairs, trembling in anticipation for what would come next, attempting to stifle giggles that would surely give himself away. However, his attention was brought back to his mother when she cleared her throat and said, “I don’t even know what to do with you.”
Taemin felt his stomach twirl again and again before he sucked in a breath and said, “What did I do?”
“You’re acting stupid, that’s what. I get home from work, making a living for us to survive, and Jinki tells me you kissed some boy.”
“It wasn’t just some boy, mom. It was Minho.” He realized later that this statement didn’t help his case in any sort.
“It was... what? Oh, great, it was Minho. Great. I really need Mrs. Choi to call me again and blow my ear out telling me i’m raising my children wrong. But she might be on to something because apparently my son thinks it’s okay to go around kissing boys.”
“I’m gay,” Taemin stated boldly. He looked into his mothers eyes, but he’d never felt like cowering in the corner more.
“Wha... What did you just...? You’re fifteen, you don’t know what you want and you are most definitely not gay.”
“Who are you to say?”
“You’re god-damned mother, that’s who. This isn’t funny and you aren’t gay and you’re never seeing Choi Minho again,” she shook with anger.
“You can’t do that,” Taemin yelled back, “and you’re only mad because dad was gay too. That’s why he left you.”
Her stare became no less intimidating, “You’re not gay, and we’re not staying here. We’re moving.”
Taemin just stared at her in disbelief before saying, “Like hell I am,” and he stormed out of the house.
Where did he go? Minho’s house. However, he was all but chased off of the Choi property by Mrs. Choi who had promised to never let Minho leave the house again, and most certainly would never let him see Taemin again, not after those pictures. He also vaguely heard something about ‘fag-hag mother who turned every man she saw into a homosexual’, but he wasn’t too concerned with that.
Anyway, Taemin hadn’t seen Minho since then and his last month at his old school had been filled with gay jokes and overly harsh treatment from anyone he’d ever known, family included. The worst part about it was that Taemin was forced to endure it alone, no Minho, no friends, no nothing. So, you’d think he’d be happy about moving to a new place, but he really just wanted to die. Was that so wrong to ask for?
~
Jonghyun lay shirtless on a pool raft, enjoying the sun. Mostly because that’s what players did, they enjoyed things. He was relaxing after multiple rounds of swimming back and forth practicing each stroke to a T. After all, he wasn’t the most anticipated JV athlete for nothing. Now, it was time to improve upon his tan, because although he was sporty and everyone loved him, he still needed to keep up his good looks for all the ladies and gentlemen he planned to seduce or continue to seduce.
He said ladies and gentlemen because that’s exactly what he meant, ladies and gentlemen. You could say that Jonghyun was gay, a complete and total fruit, but everyone loved him and he may have been more manly and impressive than any of the straight guys at Werner High. In fact, he wasn’t exactly gay because he did say ladies and gentlemen. The more accurate term would be bi, but Jonghyun didn’t really like labels unless they consisted of ‘studly’ and ‘iwantyou’.
In most people’s opinion at Werner High, Jonghyun was a very impressive person. That, or they were scared shitless of him, but mostly just impressed. The facts were that Jonghyun was tough. He wouldn’t take crap from anyone. Surprisingly enough, Jonghyun had already decided he was also attracted to boys when he was around the age of twelve. It hadn’t been something he fought, and it hadn’t been something he’d given long-drawn out thoughts to. It was just that one day, out of the blue to most, he decided that he wanted to ask out Lee Sungmin. To Jonghyun, this wasn’t weird at all and he did this with so much confidence, Sungmin almost felt like he couldn’t say no. Almost being the key word because he did say no, not that Jonghyun cared much, because he kept asking him every single day for three weeks until Sungmin said yes and thus began the ‘epicness’ that is Kim Jonghyun.
Now, the reason people didn’t torment Jonghyun was actually a very good reason that involved the will of wanting to live. A small few had taken a chance, out of the goodness of their hearts, and become an excellent example of why you never picked on Kim Jonghyun. After all, Jonghyun had long been involved in football, swimming, baseball, karate, and really any other sport that involved being muscly and intimidatingly strong. So, unless you really just wanted to die and needed to be put out of your misery, Jonghyun was someone you made nice with and Jonghyun was willing to make nice with everyone. Yes, a player indeed.
Because Jonghyun didn’t have to worry about the torments of every day life, he always seemed laid back and in a good mood. Nothing ever seemed to ruin his day because he was just so god-damned nice and made sure everyone around him felt good too, in whatever way possible. Yes, Jonghyun is so smooth and cool. But don’t mess with Key, or you’ll be in so much trouble.
If there was one thing that set Jonghyun off into a tizzy, it was his cousin Kim Kibum. Key could most easily be described as a girl with a penis. Now, it was true Key was technically a boy. He, in no way, shape, or form, had a vagina. It was more of the way he acted, dressed, and presented himself since he’d moved to Werner in the eighth grade. Most items in Key’s closet were short skirts and lacy, sleeveless tops. When he’d first shown up his hair was blond, with short, tight curls. Now, he had half of his head shaved in what most often looked like a mohawk-type thing. Some how, he managed to pull all of this off, looking cuter than half the girls at school, and became friends or ‘friends’ with over three-fourths of them. He was the gossip queen and a part-time hoe-bag.
This upset Jonghyun greatly because ever since he could remember Kibum was such a girl and being the eldest male in the family, he knew he needed to protect his little cousins, but girls especially because that’s just what a man should do. So, even though Kibum wasn’t technically a girl, all the feelings of protectiveness were there. Anywhere the two were spotted together, you may see Jonghyun throwing jackets, blankets, large t-shirts, and other such things over Kibum to try and conceal all the skin Key purposely showed in attempts to attract any man he could lay his eyes on. Also, it was well-known that any guy who specifically turned down Kibum’s offer to have sex or at least be given a blow-job would earn $20 from Jonghyun upon the moment he heard the news. It was that, or you went with Kibum and later ended up bleeding from your face in a dark alley, Jonghyun walking away all ‘unsuspicious’ like.
Anyway, the point was that Jonghyun had it good. Nothing was wrong and he pretty much got anything he wanted. He even had a good relationship with his parents, something that not even all straight people have. He could remember when his parents found out he’d been fooling around with dudes. It wasn’t nearly as painful as some people made it seem like it might be.
“Hey dad,” he had said one day out of the blue as he often did when he had a question. He wasn’t a shy kid by any means.
“Yeah, Jong?” he remembered his dad had been working on their car because of some reason or another.
“Is there ever times when you like people who aren’t mom?”
“Well, I like you, but I know what you’re asking. The answer is no. I married your mom because I love her and decided to love her and only her for the rest of my life.”
Jonghyun nodded as he thought about it. It seemed perfectly logical. “Okay, but before there was mom, did you like other people?”
His father chuckled a little, “S’pose I did, jong. Is there someone you like?”
Jonghyun made a thoughtful noise before answering, “Yes, but I like a lot of people. It’s not just one person.”
Again, there was a chuckle, “You have to treat ladies right, son. Remember that.”
Jonghyun’s face became a little bit questioning, “What about guys?”
His father turned toward him, putting down whatever tool he’d been holding and just looked at his son for a second. “You have a guy you like?”
“Yeah,” Jonghyun started excitedly, “He’s pretty cool. He likes things that I like. He just moved here and he hangs out with some of my other friends, so I hang out with him to. He doesn’t know I like him yet. I was thinking about saying something, but I thought I should ask you first.”
His father looked at him, as if searching for something, before he turned his attention back to the car and let out another chuckle that was just so him, “Well, son. If you like someone, you should treat them well, girl or boy.” And that was that.
His mother had acted weird at first. He assumed his father told her everything, but it didn’t faze Jonghyun. He just acted like himself, as his father always told him, and eventually his mother went back to normal. Plus, Jonghyun’s coming out was like preparation for when Kibum came to live with them in Werner a year later. Preparation, indeed.