Comments | fetichista: happy solstice-scheduled holiday of your choice or heritage... (big load of pc cheese i know...)

fetichista

happy solstice-scheduled holiday of your choice or heritage... (big load of pc cheese i know...)

Dec 25, 2007 12:00

i'm reading the blog of a famous ottawa kinky erotica writer. actually i have been reading for about 2 years now. i started while i was working at the kinky sex store and then i kept on even after i got "let go" (i just wasn,t cool enough kids, i sorry...).

so this wonderful writer is suffering from a breakup where she got let go on the basis that ( Read more... )

Comments 11

bixkitty December 25 2007, 17:40:01 UTC

Lots of love and hugs. :D

fetichista December 25 2007, 20:00:02 UTC

bugs and fishes to you too liz!

toughgav December 25 2007, 23:50:42 UTC

hey! i totally know who yr talking about without remembering the name of said kinky writer, or anything that this writer has written. but there was a book.. square, and perhaps green? oh, ottawa. i've shoved you to the smallest part of my memory...

i so like that you're writing again, even while you report such stirring & sad things. is it just the winter? is it relocation? is it suffering for art? whatever it is, i'm here listening, you should know.

fetichista December 26 2007, 12:42:16 UTC

thanks!
although i'm kinda shocked that people are reading. and i guess every other comment is a "there, there mel. things will get better...". but i thought i needed to write because if songwriting was going slowly then i really needed another place to vent.
so... to recap:
1. lots of great things in music. but with advancement comes sacrifices
2. self-identity and being scared to move on and take risks and face big changes. so yes, relocation is stressful. i miss my loved ones dearly and i haven't left them yet.
3. getting dumped by someone who pretended they loved me for 4 months unil they found their true identity and their true love and had no need to wait around with the fake one anymore. this is from the summer...

so it's a mix of things. but it's not winter. my sister's more in tune with the weather/depression sorta things. i'm just melodramatic and hold on to grudges...for.ever.

how about your sad and stirring things? winter?

fetichista December 26 2007, 13:05:58 UTC

and yes, the green little book with the sea creature on it is definitely hers. i'm gonna miss ottawa too. it doesn't suck here. it sucks to be sad here though...

queenglo December 26 2007, 01:48:53 UTC

i think i know who you're talking about as well as who her partner was...but then ottawa is pretty small.

i am SO looking forward to seeing you tomorrow! you particularly! i hope to be one of the things you have in your life that you are happy about...or at least not regretful about...

fetichista December 26 2007, 12:45:44 UTC

holy shit that's right. that's tonight.
i'm undecided between 2 things i could give you that have recently come in my possession that i could give you...
both are cool...
i don't regret knowing you. that would be odd. why would i regret knowing you? do you regret knowing me? am i asian enough for you? wait a minute... i'm not asian at all! how can you possibly like me? i keep forgetting this is not protected... i should stop being mean.

anyway, i'm looking fwd to seeing you. especially since you missed the faild going-away party hoopla during the huge snow storm.
hope you're well... and happy birthday!
husg, mel.

mellodyus December 26 2007, 03:07:53 UTC

i have had a relationship that has lasted for 2 days! lol. i don't really count it though. she was crazy.

i understand what you mean about not making any new years resolutions. i see the positive in doing so - but i tend to dissapoint myself when i make promises to myself that i can't keep. & i also understand what you mean about clinging on to the memory of people who really don't deserve any of my thoughts. and for some reason all i can think about are the great times when i know the bad times outweighed the good times....

fetichista December 26 2007, 12:47:03 UTC

2 days with a psycho??
you HAVE to write a short story about it.
or at least, do you have lj entries from around time when you were dating. i'm sure it wasn't as entertaining for you as i am making it sound. sorry i'm insensitive...

so do you have nyr's?

mellodyus December 26 2007, 18:07:57 UTC

i didn't write much that month. it was actually around this time last year. i will post a short story about it. she wasn't like psycho psycho but she surely was an indecisive, self centered, egotistical, selfish person.

i talked to her yesterday.

why i keep these people in my life, i don't know....

mellodyus January 3 2008, 13:57:49 UTC

i wrote the now, not to short story about the girl....

http://mellodyus.livejournal.com/125270.html