Tomorrow I Will Wake Up in Your Bed : Chapter 19
Title: Tomorrow I Will Wake Up in Your Bed : Chapter 19
Authors:
fernedakki
Pairing: Lukas Podolski / Bastian Schweinsteiger
Rating: PG-13 (This part)
Genre: Alternate Reality / Romance
Word Count: 2,945 Words
Disclaimer: This did not actually happen, although God knows I wish.
Summary: On Bastian’s 30th Birthday, Lukas wondered what it would be like if he's in Ibiza with his best friend tonight instead of Turkey. The next morning, he woke up to find Bastian in his bed, naked and sleeping, and he’s not in Turkey anymore.
Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18
A/N: You can also read this on AO3. And feedbacks, pls!
Tomorrow I Will Wake Up In Your Bed: Chapter 19
Bastian stayed in London until the day after Arsenal's game with Southampton.
It's the best moment Lukas had ever experienced here second to their time in Ibiza, actually, it's even better because Lukas didn't have to lie about anything now. He felt free to be himself and Bastian was okay with it. He came back from training and found the blonde waiting for him with home-cooked dinner, to Lukas' surprise because he never actually cooked since he always had Monika doing that for him. Though he noticed that this Lukas' kitchen had lots of seasoning and kitchenware, which was in contrast with his London house in the other universe.
What's more, he'd never known Bastian could cook, and was also good at it.
They ate in mostly, played games and when the nights came, Lukas' body entwined around Bastian as they made love over and over.
It's the four happiest nights of his life, in both this world and the other world.
He knew it couldn't last, that's why he told Bastian the truth, so that the Bavarian could help him to go back. He DIDN'T want it to last, as reluctant as he was, he had to go back to his real life and return this life to the other him. He didn't belong here, and he couldn't live more like this, he's drowning deeper and deeper so this had to stop, otherwise he'd never be able to let it go.
Otherwise, he wouldn't be able to let Bastian go.
The last night they spent together in his London house, Bastian asked, "what will you do when you get back there?"
Lukas knew what this was all about. "Follow my heart." He'd thought about this before so he's quite certain what he wanted and didn't want to do. He knew Bastian wanted to hear this answer and he had it perfectly on tap for him.
"What about Louis?" He asked.
"He'll cope with that eventually," Lukas answered, "just like he's coped with us here."
"It might be more difficult for him there because in this world you and Monika had never actually married...," his voice trailed off. The Pole caught Bastian's hand beside him reassuringly.
"It will work," he whispered. "We’ll make it work."
"What do you think the other Lukas is doing, if he's actually in your reality?" The blonde asked curiously, the Pole quirked his brow.
"Trying to win you back?" He guessed, he would do the same if he's in the other's shoes.
"You know what?" Bastian whispered, agreed, "I bet he does."
***
"Would you like to go to Munich with me?" Lukas asked Louis on the phone one day. The end of the year was creeping up and Louis' school would have Christmas break soon, the last time Bastian snatched him from Cologne, he had to take leave for three days.
"When, dad?" Louis sounded energetic.
They arranged to take him out of Cologne on December the 15th, Arsenal had a match with Newcastle United the day before and wouldn't have the next until December the 21st with Liverpool, so Lukas had a lot of time while Bayern Munich would have the last match of 2014 with Mainz on December the 19th. Their next match after that was as far as January 30th 2015.
Lukas envied Bastian that much, he'd say it aloud.
And he planned to take Louis to Munich to surprise Bastian this time. He flew to Cologne on December the 14th and stayed a night there, then they took a flight to Munich and knocked on Bastian's door on a Monday's winter morning.
Bastian's wide bewildered eyes were just worth it all, topped it off by the jolly, "guten morgen, tata Schweini," from Louis.
Bastian was about to go out to training, he'd have a match with SC Freiburg tomorrow on the home ground. Louis decided he wanted to watch Bayern Munich's training so they all went together. Their friends didn't look much surprised when Lukas showed up at Allianz Arena but were a bit amazed to also see Louis there, without Monika even.
So they sat in the stands watching the team training on the ground. Louis and Lukas chatted about techniques the team used and when they're finished, Louis was allowed to access the pitch, Lukas followed him.
They kicked around for a bit waiting for Bastian to shower. When he finished, he drove them all to a Bräuhaus near Marienplatz for dinner: typical Bavarian cuisine. The sun set early in winter and the cold weather made them sprint straight back home after that.
It's not the first time that Lukas stayed over at Bastian's place in this reality, though in the other reality he had never had a chance since Bastian always lived with Sarah for as long as he remembered. He used to sleep over here when Germany National Team had a match with Scotland on September during the first international call-up after the World Cup. He guessed Louis had never come here since Monika was always around him. Once at home, Bastian showed Louis old X-Men comics to the young Pole's overzealousness. And their family time? The Bavarian dug out Marvel vs Capcom Play Station's game he used to play with Lukas in U21 camp.
Louis loved Gambit so much as well as Bastian, he kept using him in battles and was very good at it.
The night wore on and it's time for bed, Lukas tucked Louis in for the night in the guestroom while he'd sleep in Bastian's room, just like they'd done at Lukas' house in London. Bastian snuggled up against him as they fell asleep together and Lukas hugged him tight, he knew they didn't have much time left but he surely wouldn't let him go tonight.
It almost seemed like Christmas had arrived early for Lukas, starting now because at first he wasn't sure that he could spend Christmas holidays with them, he had a match on Boxing Day after all so he just wanted to spend time with his family as much as he could.
The next day they went to cheer Bastian up for the match against SC Freiburg, after this Bastian would be free for two days before another match with Mainz, they stayed at home and made it as sweet as possible, they did everything together as usual: cook, eat, then play games and watch TV.
After the match with Mainz, they all flew to Liverpool for Arsenal's match there and then to London afterwards, and that's how the three of them spent holidays together for a couple of days before they flew back to Cologne for Christmas. They had a homey family reunion at Lukas' parents' house, both Justyna's family and his, both Bastian and Monika were there and they're very polite towards one another.
Lukas had no idea what's happening at all until a guy with blond hair arrived to pick Monika up after dinner. He greeted everyone at the table and everyone accepted him cordially. He also shook hand with Lukas and that's when he realized that Monika had a new lover.
That truly boggled his mind.
He asked Louis about the guy afterwards and Louis just said, "Oh, that's Silas, mommy's boyfriend," deadpannedly.
It boggled his mind even more that Louis didn't seem to be fazed a bit by it. Lukas felt something churn in his stomach and he realized that must be how Monika felt when seeing him with Bastian, it must take a while to get accustomed to the sight though for him it didn't feel like jealousy, it just felt weird.
Louis stayed with Monika for a while then Bastian took him to London again on January the 3rd, Lukas had a match with Hull City the next day and they came home to celebrate Arsenal's victory. After dinner which Bastian cooked, Lukas dragged Bastian to a corner and asked with a dry voice, "Will you go to Ibiza with me?"
He had planned all this, he'd checked the lunar calendar and marked the date of the next full moon, it's on the night of January the 5th.
Bastian looked at him, but it's not like he looked at him. Lukas looked back calmly. They both knew what this meant, he'd told Bastian that he's the rightful owner of the stone and was the one who could wish upon it and make it work. Bastian knew what he had to do to finish this, he had the right to end everything.
The blonde still looked at him blankly, then he asked curtly, "after all this time, you still want to go back?"
Oh, what now? "Schweini, I told you I had to go back. It's not about what I want, it's about what I have to do. Of course I never want to leave you, not now, not ever, but I can't steal someone else's life." He closed his eyes.
The Bavarian was silent, Lukas wanted to ask what problem he had with that anyway since for him it would be the same, better even because he'd have his same old and real Lukas back. Lukas was the one who should be upset because things wouldn't be the same for him, he wouldn't get out of this unscathed, he wouldn't go back the same person as when he arrived.
"Okay," Bastian answered and the Pole felt fingers glide across his cheek. His eyes snapped open and he found the blonde looking at him like he understood Lukas' predicament. "If it has to be done anyway, let's get it done. What are you going to tell Louis if we're to take him to Ibiza in winter? I did promise to take him to an island but in this season was outrageous." He wrinkled his nose.
"Actually, Louis knew what's going on," Lukas replied. Bastian's jaw dropped.
"What?!" He hissed, "You told Louis about what happened?"
"Well, actually, he's the first and only one who noticed that I was...different," he mumbled.
"He noticed it?" Bastian couldn't believe his own ears.
"He asked me the first night I arrived in Cologne from Ibiza who I was." Lukas smiled at his son smartass-ness. "Even you couldn't tell me apart after spending time alone with me in Ibiza for four days."
"I would never compete with Louis' brain for sure," he murmured apprehensively.
"So...," Lukas still wasn't sure, "we'll go to Ibiza tomorrow?"
Bastian pursed his lips. "I'll call your agent to book flights for us while you tell Louis," he said and left Lukas for his phone which also had Lukas' agent's number. The Pole walked over to Louis in the living room while Bastian talked to his agent in his room, he didn't know how to start so he sat silently with his son as they watched Ben 10 on Cartoon Network together. When the Bavarian came back, he sat on the armrest next to Lukas, put his arm around the Pole's shoulder and said, "the flight was at 9.20, Heathrow, British Airways."
"We're going to Ibiza tomorrow together, Louis," Lukas said. Louis snapped his head around.
"Ibiza?" He sounded really unsure.
"Yes, Ibiza, buddy." Lukas looked at him. "Do you want to escort me home?"
Louis' eyes went wide this time, he looked between Lukas and Bastian like to evaluate the situation. "You mean...that?" He's even more hesitant. "Does Schweini know now?"
"Yes, I told him. He's a bit upset though when I told him that you found that out by yourself while he actually had no clues." The Bavarian hit him on the back of his head.
Louis looked between the two of them. "Umm, so...you're leaving us?" he then looked down at the floor, his voice faded and Lukas' heart sank immediately. Why does no one want him to leave? This starts to corrode his intention, Louis' dejected face was even worse than Bastian's. The Pole's heart clenched hard in his chest.
"Listen, Louis, I just want to return this life to the other me," he said though wavering now, "you'll eventually get your real dad back. Don't you want that? Don't you miss him?"
Louis still looked at the floor. "I'm not sure anymore."
Fuck this. Lukas bit his lips, why does everything come out like this? "Why? You want that before," his voice faded, too.
"You're a great dad," was Louis' answer.
"I'm sure the other me was better than me." He's really sure about it.
"I...," Louis' voice trailed off, he didn't know what to say. The Bavarian held his hand out to cover Lukas' hand in his lap and he realized he's shaking, he caught the blonde's hand and held onto for dear life. "But I like you," Louis said, looking up at him.
Lukas took in a deep breath, Bastian squeezed his hand encouragingly. The Pole turned to look at the Bavarian to find that he also looked at the floor, even Bastian didn't support him deep down. He turned to look at his son. "I like you, too, buddy, but I still have to return you to your dad-"
"You're my dad!" Louis cut him off, glint of tears in his eyes, "I don't want others! Why do all of you keep leaving me? First you left me for Schweini, now you'll leave me to the other me in your world because you don't want me!" He shouted, jumped out of the sofa and dashed into his room. Lukas shot up from the couch, panicked.
"No, Louis!-"
"Leave him," Bastian's calm voice spoke up, he didn't let go of Lukas' hand and pulled him down to sit back on the sofa. "Talk to him when he calms down. Give him some time," the blonde kissed his cheek and whispered against his skin.
"He's being ridiculous," Lukas said in a low voice which was shaking around the edge.
"Yes, he is, he feels like you're abandoning him again," Bastian nuzzled against his cheek.
"But it's not like that-"
"I know it's not like that, Luki, you don't have to explain it to me." He put his hands around Lukas' shoulder and snuggled up against the crook of his neck. The Pole turned around to kiss Bastian on the forehead.
"You won't be a ridiculous, too, will you?" He asked uncertainly. Bastian snickered and kissed the Pole's neck, it's ticklish and made him goosebump. "Stop doing that, Louis is here," he whispered. The blonde quirked up his brow.
"So?" And he licked Lukas' neck this time, the Pole cringed away immediately.
"Basti!"
Bastian laughed and pulled away, Lukas turned around, smiling, and leaned in to kiss the Bavarian on the lips. Bastian kissed back, smiling, too. "You can go to Louis now," he whispered against Lukas' lips, "he needs you."
The Pole broke away. "Okay." He got up but still didn't let go of Bastian's hand. "Don't you want to come together?"
"You go first," the blonde mumbled and pulled his hand away.
Lukas didn't comment but walking away to the guestroom. Bastian's eyes were after him until his back was out of sight then he got up from the armrest to follow him.
He let Lukas go first so that he wouldn't see him wiping off his tears.
Louis was hiding under the duvet as Lukas walked in. The room was dark, the Pole sat on the edge of the bed. Louis was still but he knew his son wasn't asleep, of course. "You know I love you, right? I've told you this before," Lukas started to his lying son. "It's not that I don't love you or choose others over you, neither Schweini nor the other you nor anyone else. It's just that I don't belong here, this isn't my life. I'm living someone else's life and I can't keep on doing that, buddy."
"But you belong here now," Louis' muffled voice could be heard through the duvet, "it is your life now."
"No, it's not," Lukas said and he could hear Bastian walk up to the bed. The Bavarian put his arm on his shoulder as an encouragement again. "I'm stealing someone else's life like now, Louis, and you can't just steal from people, you know that."
With that, Louis was silent, he was contemplating Lukas' words and the Pole left him to it. Bastian sat down beside him on the bed. Finally, Louis took the blanket off him. "Schweini, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say that." He bit his lips. Bastian smiled softly.
"It's okay, buddy. But you have to learn to control your temper better than that in the future. The tongue has no bones but it is strong enough to break a heart so be careful with your words, alright?"
"I'm sorry!" Louis lunged at the Bavarian and squeezed him tight around the waist in a hug that almost knocked all the air out of him. Bastian stroked Louis' head consolingly.
"You're pardoned, buddy," he said.
There was silence before Louis eventually broke away from the embrace, he looked calm enough now as he looked at Lukas. "I'm sorry, dad, I shouldn't have said that, I know you didn't leave me for Schweini and also don't leave me for the other me, I'm just upset." He wiped tears off the corner of his eyes.
"You're pardoned, buddy," Lukas copied Bastian's answer and smiled softly. Louis grimaced.
"So, what are we going to do in Ibiza? Do you know a way to go back now?" He asked.
"Kind of." Lukas as well couldn't breathe properly from thinking about that. "We'll have to try whether it works."
"Okay, I'll go with you," Louis said resolutely.
To be continued in Chapter 20.
.
Authors:
fernedakki
Pairing: Lukas Podolski / Bastian Schweinsteiger
Rating: PG-13 (This part)
Genre: Alternate Reality / Romance
Word Count: 2,945 Words
Disclaimer: This did not actually happen, although God knows I wish.
Summary: On Bastian’s 30th Birthday, Lukas wondered what it would be like if he's in Ibiza with his best friend tonight instead of Turkey. The next morning, he woke up to find Bastian in his bed, naked and sleeping, and he’s not in Turkey anymore.
Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18
A/N: You can also read this on AO3. And feedbacks, pls!
Tomorrow I Will Wake Up In Your Bed: Chapter 19
Bastian stayed in London until the day after Arsenal's game with Southampton.
It's the best moment Lukas had ever experienced here second to their time in Ibiza, actually, it's even better because Lukas didn't have to lie about anything now. He felt free to be himself and Bastian was okay with it. He came back from training and found the blonde waiting for him with home-cooked dinner, to Lukas' surprise because he never actually cooked since he always had Monika doing that for him. Though he noticed that this Lukas' kitchen had lots of seasoning and kitchenware, which was in contrast with his London house in the other universe.
What's more, he'd never known Bastian could cook, and was also good at it.
They ate in mostly, played games and when the nights came, Lukas' body entwined around Bastian as they made love over and over.
It's the four happiest nights of his life, in both this world and the other world.
He knew it couldn't last, that's why he told Bastian the truth, so that the Bavarian could help him to go back. He DIDN'T want it to last, as reluctant as he was, he had to go back to his real life and return this life to the other him. He didn't belong here, and he couldn't live more like this, he's drowning deeper and deeper so this had to stop, otherwise he'd never be able to let it go.
Otherwise, he wouldn't be able to let Bastian go.
The last night they spent together in his London house, Bastian asked, "what will you do when you get back there?"
Lukas knew what this was all about. "Follow my heart." He'd thought about this before so he's quite certain what he wanted and didn't want to do. He knew Bastian wanted to hear this answer and he had it perfectly on tap for him.
"What about Louis?" He asked.
"He'll cope with that eventually," Lukas answered, "just like he's coped with us here."
"It might be more difficult for him there because in this world you and Monika had never actually married...," his voice trailed off. The Pole caught Bastian's hand beside him reassuringly.
"It will work," he whispered. "We’ll make it work."
"What do you think the other Lukas is doing, if he's actually in your reality?" The blonde asked curiously, the Pole quirked his brow.
"Trying to win you back?" He guessed, he would do the same if he's in the other's shoes.
"You know what?" Bastian whispered, agreed, "I bet he does."
***
"Would you like to go to Munich with me?" Lukas asked Louis on the phone one day. The end of the year was creeping up and Louis' school would have Christmas break soon, the last time Bastian snatched him from Cologne, he had to take leave for three days.
"When, dad?" Louis sounded energetic.
They arranged to take him out of Cologne on December the 15th, Arsenal had a match with Newcastle United the day before and wouldn't have the next until December the 21st with Liverpool, so Lukas had a lot of time while Bayern Munich would have the last match of 2014 with Mainz on December the 19th. Their next match after that was as far as January 30th 2015.
Lukas envied Bastian that much, he'd say it aloud.
And he planned to take Louis to Munich to surprise Bastian this time. He flew to Cologne on December the 14th and stayed a night there, then they took a flight to Munich and knocked on Bastian's door on a Monday's winter morning.
Bastian's wide bewildered eyes were just worth it all, topped it off by the jolly, "guten morgen, tata Schweini," from Louis.
Bastian was about to go out to training, he'd have a match with SC Freiburg tomorrow on the home ground. Louis decided he wanted to watch Bayern Munich's training so they all went together. Their friends didn't look much surprised when Lukas showed up at Allianz Arena but were a bit amazed to also see Louis there, without Monika even.
So they sat in the stands watching the team training on the ground. Louis and Lukas chatted about techniques the team used and when they're finished, Louis was allowed to access the pitch, Lukas followed him.
They kicked around for a bit waiting for Bastian to shower. When he finished, he drove them all to a Bräuhaus near Marienplatz for dinner: typical Bavarian cuisine. The sun set early in winter and the cold weather made them sprint straight back home after that.
It's not the first time that Lukas stayed over at Bastian's place in this reality, though in the other reality he had never had a chance since Bastian always lived with Sarah for as long as he remembered. He used to sleep over here when Germany National Team had a match with Scotland on September during the first international call-up after the World Cup. He guessed Louis had never come here since Monika was always around him. Once at home, Bastian showed Louis old X-Men comics to the young Pole's overzealousness. And their family time? The Bavarian dug out Marvel vs Capcom Play Station's game he used to play with Lukas in U21 camp.
Louis loved Gambit so much as well as Bastian, he kept using him in battles and was very good at it.
The night wore on and it's time for bed, Lukas tucked Louis in for the night in the guestroom while he'd sleep in Bastian's room, just like they'd done at Lukas' house in London. Bastian snuggled up against him as they fell asleep together and Lukas hugged him tight, he knew they didn't have much time left but he surely wouldn't let him go tonight.
It almost seemed like Christmas had arrived early for Lukas, starting now because at first he wasn't sure that he could spend Christmas holidays with them, he had a match on Boxing Day after all so he just wanted to spend time with his family as much as he could.
The next day they went to cheer Bastian up for the match against SC Freiburg, after this Bastian would be free for two days before another match with Mainz, they stayed at home and made it as sweet as possible, they did everything together as usual: cook, eat, then play games and watch TV.
After the match with Mainz, they all flew to Liverpool for Arsenal's match there and then to London afterwards, and that's how the three of them spent holidays together for a couple of days before they flew back to Cologne for Christmas. They had a homey family reunion at Lukas' parents' house, both Justyna's family and his, both Bastian and Monika were there and they're very polite towards one another.
Lukas had no idea what's happening at all until a guy with blond hair arrived to pick Monika up after dinner. He greeted everyone at the table and everyone accepted him cordially. He also shook hand with Lukas and that's when he realized that Monika had a new lover.
That truly boggled his mind.
He asked Louis about the guy afterwards and Louis just said, "Oh, that's Silas, mommy's boyfriend," deadpannedly.
It boggled his mind even more that Louis didn't seem to be fazed a bit by it. Lukas felt something churn in his stomach and he realized that must be how Monika felt when seeing him with Bastian, it must take a while to get accustomed to the sight though for him it didn't feel like jealousy, it just felt weird.
Louis stayed with Monika for a while then Bastian took him to London again on January the 3rd, Lukas had a match with Hull City the next day and they came home to celebrate Arsenal's victory. After dinner which Bastian cooked, Lukas dragged Bastian to a corner and asked with a dry voice, "Will you go to Ibiza with me?"
He had planned all this, he'd checked the lunar calendar and marked the date of the next full moon, it's on the night of January the 5th.
Bastian looked at him, but it's not like he looked at him. Lukas looked back calmly. They both knew what this meant, he'd told Bastian that he's the rightful owner of the stone and was the one who could wish upon it and make it work. Bastian knew what he had to do to finish this, he had the right to end everything.
The blonde still looked at him blankly, then he asked curtly, "after all this time, you still want to go back?"
Oh, what now? "Schweini, I told you I had to go back. It's not about what I want, it's about what I have to do. Of course I never want to leave you, not now, not ever, but I can't steal someone else's life." He closed his eyes.
The Bavarian was silent, Lukas wanted to ask what problem he had with that anyway since for him it would be the same, better even because he'd have his same old and real Lukas back. Lukas was the one who should be upset because things wouldn't be the same for him, he wouldn't get out of this unscathed, he wouldn't go back the same person as when he arrived.
"Okay," Bastian answered and the Pole felt fingers glide across his cheek. His eyes snapped open and he found the blonde looking at him like he understood Lukas' predicament. "If it has to be done anyway, let's get it done. What are you going to tell Louis if we're to take him to Ibiza in winter? I did promise to take him to an island but in this season was outrageous." He wrinkled his nose.
"Actually, Louis knew what's going on," Lukas replied. Bastian's jaw dropped.
"What?!" He hissed, "You told Louis about what happened?"
"Well, actually, he's the first and only one who noticed that I was...different," he mumbled.
"He noticed it?" Bastian couldn't believe his own ears.
"He asked me the first night I arrived in Cologne from Ibiza who I was." Lukas smiled at his son smartass-ness. "Even you couldn't tell me apart after spending time alone with me in Ibiza for four days."
"I would never compete with Louis' brain for sure," he murmured apprehensively.
"So...," Lukas still wasn't sure, "we'll go to Ibiza tomorrow?"
Bastian pursed his lips. "I'll call your agent to book flights for us while you tell Louis," he said and left Lukas for his phone which also had Lukas' agent's number. The Pole walked over to Louis in the living room while Bastian talked to his agent in his room, he didn't know how to start so he sat silently with his son as they watched Ben 10 on Cartoon Network together. When the Bavarian came back, he sat on the armrest next to Lukas, put his arm around the Pole's shoulder and said, "the flight was at 9.20, Heathrow, British Airways."
"We're going to Ibiza tomorrow together, Louis," Lukas said. Louis snapped his head around.
"Ibiza?" He sounded really unsure.
"Yes, Ibiza, buddy." Lukas looked at him. "Do you want to escort me home?"
Louis' eyes went wide this time, he looked between Lukas and Bastian like to evaluate the situation. "You mean...that?" He's even more hesitant. "Does Schweini know now?"
"Yes, I told him. He's a bit upset though when I told him that you found that out by yourself while he actually had no clues." The Bavarian hit him on the back of his head.
Louis looked between the two of them. "Umm, so...you're leaving us?" he then looked down at the floor, his voice faded and Lukas' heart sank immediately. Why does no one want him to leave? This starts to corrode his intention, Louis' dejected face was even worse than Bastian's. The Pole's heart clenched hard in his chest.
"Listen, Louis, I just want to return this life to the other me," he said though wavering now, "you'll eventually get your real dad back. Don't you want that? Don't you miss him?"
Louis still looked at the floor. "I'm not sure anymore."
Fuck this. Lukas bit his lips, why does everything come out like this? "Why? You want that before," his voice faded, too.
"You're a great dad," was Louis' answer.
"I'm sure the other me was better than me." He's really sure about it.
"I...," Louis' voice trailed off, he didn't know what to say. The Bavarian held his hand out to cover Lukas' hand in his lap and he realized he's shaking, he caught the blonde's hand and held onto for dear life. "But I like you," Louis said, looking up at him.
Lukas took in a deep breath, Bastian squeezed his hand encouragingly. The Pole turned to look at the Bavarian to find that he also looked at the floor, even Bastian didn't support him deep down. He turned to look at his son. "I like you, too, buddy, but I still have to return you to your dad-"
"You're my dad!" Louis cut him off, glint of tears in his eyes, "I don't want others! Why do all of you keep leaving me? First you left me for Schweini, now you'll leave me to the other me in your world because you don't want me!" He shouted, jumped out of the sofa and dashed into his room. Lukas shot up from the couch, panicked.
"No, Louis!-"
"Leave him," Bastian's calm voice spoke up, he didn't let go of Lukas' hand and pulled him down to sit back on the sofa. "Talk to him when he calms down. Give him some time," the blonde kissed his cheek and whispered against his skin.
"He's being ridiculous," Lukas said in a low voice which was shaking around the edge.
"Yes, he is, he feels like you're abandoning him again," Bastian nuzzled against his cheek.
"But it's not like that-"
"I know it's not like that, Luki, you don't have to explain it to me." He put his hands around Lukas' shoulder and snuggled up against the crook of his neck. The Pole turned around to kiss Bastian on the forehead.
"You won't be a ridiculous, too, will you?" He asked uncertainly. Bastian snickered and kissed the Pole's neck, it's ticklish and made him goosebump. "Stop doing that, Louis is here," he whispered. The blonde quirked up his brow.
"So?" And he licked Lukas' neck this time, the Pole cringed away immediately.
"Basti!"
Bastian laughed and pulled away, Lukas turned around, smiling, and leaned in to kiss the Bavarian on the lips. Bastian kissed back, smiling, too. "You can go to Louis now," he whispered against Lukas' lips, "he needs you."
The Pole broke away. "Okay." He got up but still didn't let go of Bastian's hand. "Don't you want to come together?"
"You go first," the blonde mumbled and pulled his hand away.
Lukas didn't comment but walking away to the guestroom. Bastian's eyes were after him until his back was out of sight then he got up from the armrest to follow him.
He let Lukas go first so that he wouldn't see him wiping off his tears.
Louis was hiding under the duvet as Lukas walked in. The room was dark, the Pole sat on the edge of the bed. Louis was still but he knew his son wasn't asleep, of course. "You know I love you, right? I've told you this before," Lukas started to his lying son. "It's not that I don't love you or choose others over you, neither Schweini nor the other you nor anyone else. It's just that I don't belong here, this isn't my life. I'm living someone else's life and I can't keep on doing that, buddy."
"But you belong here now," Louis' muffled voice could be heard through the duvet, "it is your life now."
"No, it's not," Lukas said and he could hear Bastian walk up to the bed. The Bavarian put his arm on his shoulder as an encouragement again. "I'm stealing someone else's life like now, Louis, and you can't just steal from people, you know that."
With that, Louis was silent, he was contemplating Lukas' words and the Pole left him to it. Bastian sat down beside him on the bed. Finally, Louis took the blanket off him. "Schweini, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say that." He bit his lips. Bastian smiled softly.
"It's okay, buddy. But you have to learn to control your temper better than that in the future. The tongue has no bones but it is strong enough to break a heart so be careful with your words, alright?"
"I'm sorry!" Louis lunged at the Bavarian and squeezed him tight around the waist in a hug that almost knocked all the air out of him. Bastian stroked Louis' head consolingly.
"You're pardoned, buddy," he said.
There was silence before Louis eventually broke away from the embrace, he looked calm enough now as he looked at Lukas. "I'm sorry, dad, I shouldn't have said that, I know you didn't leave me for Schweini and also don't leave me for the other me, I'm just upset." He wiped tears off the corner of his eyes.
"You're pardoned, buddy," Lukas copied Bastian's answer and smiled softly. Louis grimaced.
"So, what are we going to do in Ibiza? Do you know a way to go back now?" He asked.
"Kind of." Lukas as well couldn't breathe properly from thinking about that. "We'll have to try whether it works."
"Okay, I'll go with you," Louis said resolutely.
To be continued in Chapter 20.
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