For lastvoyages: Journal Entry 31 [voice+spam for level 8]

[feels_no_love]

[Those on level 8 get treated to something that hasn't happened in four months: loud snarling and the thumps and crashes of furniture being flung around in 8-16.]

Regaining human emotions is a completely pointless exercise in pain and humiliation. To Hell with all of it.

[private to infirmary]
Armand is in a coma again. [He really doesn't sound like

Comments

[feels_no_love]

In my cabin. Wouldn't want to inconvenience anyone else.

[feels_no_love]

I've been set an insane task and it's already gotten me in trouble. I'm not in the best of moods.

...

Thank you.

[failedcreator]

But there is much value in these emotions.

[feels_no_love]

Bah. What value could possibly make up for the trouble and pain emotions cause?

[failedcreator]

Have you not felt the depths of love as keenly as the wells of hate? Is all pain not matched by joy of the same extremity?

[feels_no_love]

...no. No it is not. This is the Barge. Joy? What joy? What love? Hope--well, that gets dashed regularly around here. Friendships wrecked by disappearance of friends, lovers gone. Reawakening my emotions here, in this hellhole, is a form of torture in itself. I will not cooperate any more.

Private

[darknessb4me]

There's a way out, you know.

Private

[feels_no_love]

I could always stop trying to care so much.

Private

[darknessb4me]

I cut out my heart. Haven't regretted it.

Private

[feels_no_love]

That probably led to a harsh death toll. When?