Blue Coffee Cups, for hidden_onigiri
Title: Blue Coffee Cups
For: hidden_onigiri
Word count: 8000~
Rating: PG-13
Summary: No one had warned Yifan that working at a bakery would be this problematic.
Disaster struck at exactly 9.17am in the form of Oh Sehun and a vividly blue coffee-to-go cup.
It was Yifan’s turn to help out behind the counter and he and Jongdae had just weathered the first rush of the day, workers and students with early classes at the nearby college swarming their little bakery to get their breakfast and possibly stock up on lunch. He had just finished refilling the beverage cooler and was now taking inventory, trying to decide of which other baked goods Jongdae would have to make another batch in the back rooms - realizing they were dangerously low on his business partner’s infamous triple chocolate muffins - when the shop door opened to the merry tinkling of the bell above the entrance.
Yifan didn’t have to look up to know who had just entered the bakery, recognizing the two bickering voices immediately, one slightly nasal, while the other hid the tiniest of lisps, barely audible unless excitement, irritation or nervousness got the better of its owner.
And Yifan almost wished he had kept his attention focused on arranging the huckleberry-lime-croissants, when he finally looked up to see Tao and Sehun approaching the lower, wooden counter between the display cases, obviously focused on finding the most painful way to jab their elbow into each other’s side. But that wasn’t what had him whirling around with alarm flaring up inside of him, just to make sure that Jongdae wasn’t actually approaching and be given the chance to discover the thing in Sehun’s hand.
The blue thing. The blue thing that looked suspiciously like a to-go cup from the one coffee shop Jongdae despised more than anything else in this world. Even though it would probably be more accurate to mention that his friend didn’t so much have a problem with the coffee shop itself, but rather with its small, energetic owner.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing with that in here? Do you have a death wish?! Turn around and get rid of it”, Yifan hissed, careful not to raise his voice too much. The last thing he needed was for Jongdae to hear him and come out from where he was busy baking in the back rooms of their shop. Dealing with his business partner’s black mood for the rest of the day wasn’t something he was looking forward to.
He had honestly expected Sehun to do as he had been told, thought the younger had just been distracted and forgotten that these particular cups were banned goods in here. What he definitely didn’t expect was for Sehun to protectively hug the paper cup to his chest and give him a scandalized glare from beneath his wind-blown fringe.
“No! Luhan made this for me. There’s no way I’ll throw this away, not until I finish every last sip!”
Yifan had no idea who that Luhan-person was, but he knew he had to make that coffee cup disappear. And fast.
“Then drink up and throw it away! Why bring it in here? You know how Jongdae gets!”
The look on the younger’s face told him he wasn’t overly concerned about that right now. Instead he glanced down at the coffee in his hands with a mixture of adoration and suffering.
“I can’t. I just drank 5 cups of coffee. If I drink any more right now I’ll barf.”
Yifan wasn’t entirely sure what to call his own reaction to those words. There was plenty of confusion and perplexity, slight amusement despite the threat of a crisis and just a hint of fascination at Sehun’s utterly carefree attitude. In short, just the usual mix of emotions everyone who dealt with the young blonde man experienced on a regular basis.
“Then why did you even get a sixth cup in the first place?”
At that Tao, who had been suspiciously quiet ever since entering the bakery a few minutes ago, finally made his presence known again with a short, derisive snort.
“Because he’s an idiot, that’s why.”
Apart from an almost indiscernible narrowing of his eyes, Sehun pointedly ignored his best friend, long slim fingers playing with the cream white lid of the cup in his hands.
“Well, you see, Minseok has these two new workers at his coffee shop”, Yifan threw a quick, cautious glance over his shoulder at the wholly unconcerned mentioning of him-who-must-not-be-named, “both Chinese and cute as hell and he gets along suspiciously well with the new barista, so I had to investigate.”
Even more lost than before, Yifan just stared at the blonde college kid, but carefully stored away the information about Minseok’s two new employees. It would be easier to keep the information away from Jongdae if he knew what to look out for.
“Investigate what? And what does that even have to do with you chugging coffee as if you’re preparing for an all-nighter right before finals?”
The sigh and half-pitying, half-disbelieving look Sehun gave him, suddenly made him feel a lot older than his 26 years. But then the brat tended to have that effect on him.
“I had to find out if Minseok and Luhan, that’s the new barista by the way, we finally chatted for a while and he told me his name, are just really fast, overly affectionate friends or if there’s more going on between them. What else would I be investigating? Interior design?
“Your major is architecture. That possibility shouldn’t be as far-fetched as you’re making it out to be”, Tao threw in from the side, making his best friend pull a face at him, before Sehun turned back towards Yifan with a haughty sniff.
“Anyway, I needed a good reason to stay and observe, so I acted as if I were desperate to finishing a paper and ordered a new drink like every 20 minutes. Because there’s nothing more obnoxious when it comes to coffee shops than those people that order only one little drink and stay for hours. The last thing I want is for Luhan to think I’m one of those people.”
“So instead you faked a coffee addiction?”
“It gives me a plausible excuse to come back whenever I want. And Luhan drinks coffee like water, he’ll understand. Maybe we can even bond over it or something like that”, the young man answered with a far-away, almost dreamy expression on his usually stoic face. It was more than just slightly disconcerting.
“And?”
It took a while for Sehun to face him, as if Yifan had pulled him out of an especially vivid daydream - and wow, that was definitely something he didn’t want to think about - but eventually the college kid returned his attention to Yifan. He could practically see the big question mark floating over his head.
“And what?”
“Is there more going on between them?”
“Inconclusive”, Sehun answered with a very displeased expression. “I’ll have to investigate further. But Luhan smiled at me - four times. And he recommended me this drink, it’s Luhan’s favorite by the way and Luhan-“
“For God’s sake, would you stop mentioning his name every five seconds?! Just because you finally managed to find out, doesn’t mean we need to hear it all the time”, came Tao’s hissed exclamation from the sidelines.
“Don’t mind him. He just has his panties in a twist because he saw the TA he has a gigantic crush on, on a date with a girl yesterday evening”, Sehun explained, waving the matter away with a careless flick of his wrist and one look at Tao and his clenched teeth, told Yifan he was about one more sentence away from a big blow-up.
All the more reason to get the two young men’s orders and hurry them along, because 1) a hysteric Tao was never a good idea, and 2) Sehun was still standing in the middle of the shop, holding that damned blue paper cup, when Jongdae could step out of the back rooms any second now.
“Alright, what can I get you? I’m sure you have somewhere else to be.”
But before they could even open their mouths, Yifan heard the eerily pleasant voice of his business partner from behind him. It had the fine hairs on the back of his neck standing up and heart seizing up with terror as his flight instinct kicked in with full force.
“No, stay. Stay and tell me more about Minseok and his two new employees. It sounds like thrilling news.”
Jongdae.
They were so screwed.
∞
Yifan wasn’t proud of it, but he only got through the remainder of the day, by escaping and locking himself into the little office on the second floor of the shop as soon as Baekhyun started his regular shift at ten and took over Yifan’s position behind the counter. He felt almost guilty for leaving the poor guy with Jongdae in one of his dangerously foul moods, but his survival instinct won out over pity any day of the week. He avoided any further contact by claiming he was too busy with finishing up their monthly statement for May - which wasn’t actually a lie, just slightly exaggerated as he was practically done with it - and spent the rest of his work day crunching numbers and sending out supply orders. That was the reason Jongdae had taken him onboard after all. Where Jongdae had perceived book keeping and the rest of the - quote Jongdae - ‘administrative crap’ as a thorn in his side and a pesky distraction from baking, Yifan and his business degree had always been way better with numbers than people. He was the numbers-guy, there to keep an eye on their quite respectable profit, make sure their bills were paid, take care of advertisement, deal with large-scale orders of their baked goods and all the various administrative matters and put a stop to it if Jongdae’s new recipes and creations got a bit too extravagant for their budget. He liked it. And he was good at it.
It was after 7pm by the time, he finally finished up the work he had gathered in a desperate attempt to keep himself busy and dared to step a foot out of his office. Downstairs Baekhyun was in the middle of the daily clean-up, busy closing up the shop and Yifan could hear Jongdae working in the back rooms, probably busy baking in his Sehun-fuelled rage. The look Baekhyun sent him from across the room was a mix of betrayed trust, condemnation and suffering.
“Coward.”
It stung, but said cowardice had kept him mostly unscathed and out of the danger zone, so he wasn’t very successful in scraping up a lot of genuine regret or chagrin. Instead he made his farewells with what he hoped was an appropriately sheepish expression and called out a quick and safe good-bye to Jongdae, leaving quickly, just in case his business partner decided to pause his baking and try to confront him once again.
The evening was pleasantly warm, as Yifan stepped out onto the busy street. There were people and students on their way home from work and evening classes, men, women and kids seated in flocks at the outdoor tables of the restaurants and cafés and stragglers flitting in and out of the few shops that were still open. Yifan could have taken the bus to the train station that held at the curb practically right in front of their bakery, but as usual he preferred to walk.
Just a few minutes later, he hiked up the stairs to the train platform, stiff muscles from sitting all day long finally loosened a bit and problems at work almost forgotten, but the staticy announcement that was made over the speakers just seconds later, had his good mood flat-lining before it was even over.
That was until he noticed the man standing several feet away from him.
Yifan didn’t think Jongdae would appreciate the irony that it was in fact the blue paper cup that caught his attention in the first place and had him taking a closer look at the man holding it. Trained to spot the ‘dangerous’ cups, so he could direct Jongdae’s attention elsewhere, until they were safely out of sight, and avoid potentially catastrophic fallouts, it was practically impossible not to notice it and its owner. Of medium height, maybe on the smaller side, slender build and with deep auburn hair that looked almost red in the glare of the fluorescent overhead lights, the man was dressed in black jeans, a light gray shirt and a dark green hoodie. Like a lot of the other people on the crowded platform he was looking up at one of the mid-sized screens showing the announcements about the malfunctioning railway switch, cancelled trains and the subsequent replacement buses, but instead of the annoyance the other commuters and passengers wore on their frazzled faces, his was clearly dominated by confusion, eyes blinking rapidly and brows pulled together in a slight frown.
Recognition and that familiar mix of excitement and nervousness set in within moments of each other.
Zhang Yixing.
Zhang Yixing and his pretty smile, endearing dimples and unpredictable breakfast choices. The other man visited their bakery almost daily, at 6.30 am sharp, all sleepy eyes, messy hair and lazy smiles, and Yifan had never seen him order the same thing twice in a row. And he always left his emotions in a chaotic tumble of elation, confusion and the sharp bite of hopeless longing. Yifan wasn’t the overly graceful type, limbs too long and his lack in coordination certainly didn’t make up for them, but whenever Yixing was in the same room, he felt as if he had been just dragged out of bed after a mere 3 hours of sleep, nothing but fumbling hands, clumsy steps and an alarmingly muddled brain, too focused on the man in front of him, to concentrate on his own actions. He just always felt that odd desperation to soak up every second of the other’s company across the counter, because just a few, way too short moments later, Yixing would be gone with an easy smile, curious tilt of his head and an adorably accented “See you tomorrow”.
So encountering him so suddenly left him at a bit of a loss, caught somewhere between wanting to walk up to him and bolt in the other direction.
Yifan didn’t realize he had already made his decision until he was about five steps away from Yixing and as if the other man had sensed his approach - or simply been alerted by the sound of his feet hitting the pavement - Yixing turned around just as the blonde came to a careful stop in front of him. One slow blink, a second one and suddenly the frown melted off Yixing’s face, to turn into an almost blinding smile. The gentle tug of his lips hit Yifan like a punch to the chest, lack of breath and tightening of his throat included.
“Yifan.”
Unlike with English words, Yixing’s accent wrapped comfortably around Yifan’s name, the difference to the careful way he spoke his words when using the still unfamiliar language almost striking. To Yifan it had always seemed as if his name was made to be used by the Chinese man. It didn’t make dealing with him any easier.
“Hey, you looked a bit lost, so I thought I’d come over and ask if you needed any help translating that”, he managed to press out, hand pointing in the general direction of the monitor, as he congratulated himself on the seemingly casual sound of his voice, when his insides were actually an unfortunate clash of nerves and eagerness.
“Yeah, I do. I’ve been here for months now and my English has gotten a lot better. But this is still too hard for me. I have no idea what’s going on, except that there won’t be any east-bound trains and something about busses.”
He looked almost grumpy as he grudgingly admitted to being in need of some assistance and Yifan made another discovery about the other man. He looked ridiculously adorable with a frown pulling at his brows and lips pushing out in an almost-pout.
“There’s a technical problem, so we’ll have to take the busses they organized instead.”
“I should have been able to understand that. It’s not that complicated.”
“You’ll get there”, Yifan hurriedly consoled him. “You’re already so good at English. You should hear me try to speak Chinese. It’s a tragedy.”
And in that moment, with another smile blooming on Yixing’s face, Yifan was almost grateful for disappointing his grandmother and failing to master the language of his ancestors, if it meant cheering the other up.
“I didn’t even know you took the train. I’ve never seen you here before”, Yifan remarked, as they made their way to the bus stop on the street below.
“I could use the bus to get home, but I like walking across the university campus, so I usually take the train.”
“I see.”
And with that he was at the end of his impressive repertoire of small talk topics, unless he wanted to mention the weather, which he didn’t. Luckily the bus pulled in at the stop just as they reached the landing of the stairs and they hurried forward to avoid having to wait for the next one. Boarding the bus behind Yixing, they made it about halfway down the aisle when they came to a halt again, squished up cozily to the people in front and behind them. From the front of the bus he heard displeased complaints and the harried busdriver’s “I’m sorry, the bus is full. There will be another one coming in a few minutes.”
Not bothering with any of the handles, Yifan just grabbed the overhead bar and watched as Yixing shuffled around until he was facing him again, which would have been fine, if it weren’t for the fact that they were now close to being completely plastered up against each other. Just a few short seconds into the ride and it already left Yifan with a slightly light-headed feeling that had absolutely nothing to do with the stagnant air in the packed vehicle, but rather with the proximity of Yixing’s body and upturned face. Raising his head to look over the huddled crowd of commuters, just so he had something to distract him from how thick Yixing’s lashes looked from this close, Yifan tried to come up with something to say, but found himself coming up completely empty handed. It was disillusioning to realize that this was enough to turn him useless and tongue-tied.
The most puzzling thing about this though, was the fact that his paralyzing attraction to Yixing didn’t even make all that much sense. He didn’t come anywhere close to resembling his usual type. All his life Yifan had dated and pursued the tall, long-legged type. Men and women that were interested in fashion or literature, often both, with calm and serious personalities that matched Yifan’s wish for quiet and mostly drama-free relationships.
And now there was Yixing, small, always dressed casually and for comfort, rather than style, completely disinterested in reading, since he, according to his own words, ‘could never focus on the plot long enough to finish a book’ and the farthest thing from serious he had ever encountered.
It confused Yifan, made him even more nervous in the other’s presence, as if it wasn’t already bad enough.
At the same time he had to admit that his attraction wasn’t actually that surprising. Not when Yixing’s casual clothing style involved low-cut tanks and shirts that provided Yifan with utterly distracting peeks of milky skin and collarbones. Not when that cheerful, constantly distracted personality offered so many small, but fascinating insights into a complex and colorful character. He never felt calm or relaxed in the other’s company, but there had also never been a second of boredom. After all it was pretty much impossible to feel bored when you had to constantly concentrate on not embarrassing yourself, while simultaneously focusing on whatever delightfully random snippet of information Yixing would reveal next.
During all of Yixing’s visits at the bakery, Yifan had collected quite the impressive array of facts about him.
He never paid with coins, even though the jingling and bulging of his wallet indicated that he never had a shortage of those.
He disliked green food with a passion, even going as far as picking the green apples from Jongdae’s apple-carrot tarts, much to the horror of his business partner.
He was extremely skilled at drawing, a talent Yifan envied fiercely and was reminded of every time he looked at the sketch of himself as a dragon that Jongdae had framed and hung on the wall behind the counter. It hadn’t taken Yixing more than ten minutes to draw Yifan’s portrait on the napkin, face pulled into what Jongdae liked to call his ‘perpetually grumpy default expression’, as he spit fire at one of their especially obnoxious and demanding regulars.
There was more of course, just little habits and things he had picked up on, like the way Yixing bit down on his lower lip whenever he couldn’t quite decide what to order, his habit of tilting his head when people used English words he didn’t know or simply spoke too fast for him to understand or the fact that there were always headphones slung around his neck or hanging from his neckline.
It almost seemed as if every of Yixing’s visits to the bakery revealed another thing about him and as Yifan finally dared to look down at the other man again, he realized he couldn’t wait to find out more.
That was when he noticed the familiar row of houses passing by the window. He had actually spent the last seven minutes too caught up in his own thoughts, instead of making the best out of this chance meeting and talking to Yixing and now he had to get off the bus at the next stop. He was incredibly tempted to hiss out a vicious curse, but changed his mind when he noticed a pig-tailed, little girl staring up at him from her perch on her mother’s lap. So he simply turned back to Yixing with a sigh.
“This is my stop.”
The other’s eyes blinked up at him with obvious surprise and another unidentifiable emotion, but before either of them could say more, the bus was pulling into the stop and Yifan had to get off, Yixing right behind him as several more people tried to make their way out onto the pavement.
“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow”, Yifan made his grudging farewells, strangely unwilling to part with the smaller man.
“Actually”, Yixing began hesitantly, an unusual look of indecision on his face and Yifan half expected him to say that he wasn’t going to make it to the bakery the next day. Instead he received the surprise of his life, as he listened to the other issue an invitation he would have never expected. “I know this great Italian place just a few blocks away. Do you want to get dinner?”
∞
And that was how Yifan found himself at a window table in one of his favorite restaurants, a steaming plate of risotto in front of him and Yixing seated across the table, smiling broadly as he finished his account of the impromptu indoor-soccer tournament his co-worker and their boss had started during a lull at work that day, scaring some of their customers half to death in the process. Yifan didn’t know any of the people he was talking about, but his enthusiasm and lively gestures had him smiling along like the infatuated idiot he was. Which was probably why it took him a while to notice the almost taxing look the other was giving him.
“What?”
“Let’s play a game.”
The unexpected suggestion had Yifan looking up from his seafood risotto with a raised eyebrow. “A game?”
“Mhm”, Yixing hummed in confirmation and Yifan wasn’t entirely sure if he really, really loved or feared the smile on lips, as the mischievous glint the smaller’s eyes had him questioning whether he would be able to get out of this with his already battered pride in one piece. He doubted it. At the same time though, his need to know what game Yixing had in mind was simply too strong to ignore.
“What kind of game?”
His suspicion must have been more than just obvious on his face, clearly lacing his voice, because just a second later Yixing’s small smile turned into a full-blown grin, amusement refusing to be contained, as his dimples made another appearance and had Yifan forgetting all about his gnawing misgivings.
“We take turn asking questions. We can ask whatever we want and there’s no passing, but…”, Yixing scooped a bit of pasta into his mouth and chewed slowly, clearly aiming for a dramatic break and succeeding spectacularly, since he had Yifan sitting at the edge of his seat by the time he finally continued explaining the rules. “We also have to give an answer to our own questions.”
It sounded like the perfect receipt for disaster and haunting humiliation. And somehow he found himself agreeing without more than a few seconds of hesitation, which should have probably worried him just as much as the impending questions thrown his way. Even Yixing seemed surprised by Yifan’s easy acquiescence, but recovered before the tall blonde got the chance to change his mind.
“Alright, I’ll go first. Are you attracted to men or women?”
The straightforward question had Yifan feeling grateful for not taking a bite of risotto, as he would have undoubtedly choked on it. As it was, he just felt his eyes widening slightly and heat shooting into his face.
“Uhm… I dated both, but I’m more often attracted to men, I guess.”
It sounded more like a question, but Yixing seemed satisfied, as he simply nodded and gave his own answer. “I’m gay.”
Just like that. No fidgeting, no avoidance of Yifan’s gaze or hasty explanations, nothing more than his distinct reply and it had the taller feeling like an adolescent kid for making such a fuss before.
“Your turn.”
Busy with trying not to let the revelation of Yixing’s sexuality get to his head, he blurted out the first, amazingly boring question that came to mind.
“If you could go to another country right now, which one would it be?”
The look Yixing gave him couldn’t have spelled “you can do better than this” more strongly, but he answered the question without protest.
“Belgium.”
Yifan wasn’t even surprised that the answer made no sense to him. He had expected China or some exotic holiday destination, instead he had gotten what he was pretty sure was a small country in Europe.
“Why?”
Yixing just gave a little shrug. “It sounds nice. What about you?”
“Canada.” This time even he had gotten the answer out without delay. “My family lives there and I really miss them sometimes.”
He thought Yixing would press him for more information and he braced himself for the uncomfortable questions - his family was something he didn’t really like to talk about, so he had no idea why he had even mentioned them in the first place - but the man opposite him just gave another short nod and continued with their game.
“What is something you’re really good and something you’re really bad at?”
The relief that poured through him wasn’t just due the fact that it was finally an easy question to answer. “Mental math. I’ve had a talent for it since I was young. And I’m really, really bad at dancing. I’m a safety hazard for the people around me.”
“Can’t say I’m surprised”, came Yixing’s clearly amused reply and had Yifan giving him an insulted frown. “I’m very good at chopping vegetables. I’m like one of those miracle gadgets in the TV commercials. And I’m really bad at remembering where I put my keys. Yesterday I looked for them for an hour and finally found them in the fridge next to the carton of milk I bought on my way home from work.”
He was pretty sure the funny fluttering in his chest was not a normal reaction to Yixing’s words. Laughter, yes. Teasing, sure. But not the strong urge to get up and pull the auburn haired man into a hug that would be too tight and long to pass as ‘friendly’.
He fired out his next question to distract himself from the weird sensation and Yixing told him how he had always wanted to become a singer as a child, while Yifan’s “Michael Jordan” made his dinner companion snort into his glass of water.
After that Yixing asked after an unusual turn-off and Yifan’s answer of “the sounds people make while eating” had Yixing freezing with his fork suspended somewhere between his mouth and plate, before announcing that he really hated it when someone touched his feet.
It went back and forth like that, with Yixing asking one borderline-outrageous or difficult question after another and Yifan trying to keep up. Surprisingly though, Yifan realized while their empty dessert plates were cleared off the table that he had actually started feeling comfortable at one point during their playful interrogation, too amused and intrigued to worry about saying the wrong thing or making a fool out of himself. Which was probably the reason he almost got caught by Yixing’s next question.
“What’s your favorite sexual position?”
Yifan already had his mouth open to answer the question when realization hit and he clamped it back shut with a strangled sound of shock. On the other side of the table Yixing was laughing so hard, he actually tipped back in his chair and almost didn’t manage to regain his balance. The tall Canadian wasn’t quite as amused.
“I’ll save that question for another time then.”
∞
“Alright, I guess we have time for one last question. Make it a good one”, Yixing announced from where he was walking a few inches beside Yifan. They had left the restaurant shortly before, after realizing that they had spent more than two hours over dinner, dessert and their questions, to Yixing’s announcement that he would walk him home. Yifan hadn’t even put up a token protest, not when this would give him a few more minutes in the other’s company.
“Tell me something about you that you don’t want me to know.”
The small sound of surprise had Yifan looking over at Yixing and coming to the astonishing realization that he had finally asked a question the other wasn’t entirely non-chalant about. The smaller was biting down on his lower lip once more, gaze flitting up to Yifan’s before he quickly averted it again and his slim fingers were curling into the green fabric of his hoodie. He looked a bit like the moment he had asked Yifan out for dinner - unsure, worried, braced for rejection.
“Alright, I should have probably told you this a lot sooner.”
The brief silence that followed had Yifan’s over-active imagination coming up with one bone-chilling scenario after another. He had a boyfriend or terminal disease, he was returning to China, he…
“I work at Minseok’s coffee shop.”
He worked at Minseok’s coffee shop.
The words had him freezing mid step, eyes widening as he watched consternation, nervousness and mild dread flickering across the auburn haired man’s face. He exploded just as the other opened his mouth.
“This so typical! I meet a great guy and he just happens to be working for the arch enemy of my business partner. Go figure”, Yifan cursed as he finally started moving again, determinedly stomping forward and paying no attention to his surrounding until he heard the other’s quiet voice from beside him.
“So you still think I’m a great guy?”
Yifan opened his mouth to tell him that that wasn’t even the point, not when he was risking his life, just by walking next to Minseok’s employee, because if Jongdae ever found out he would be dead meat, but then realization hit that he had actually been talking aloud during his rant and he simply closed his eyes with a defeated groan.
He didn’t utter another word until they came to a stop just a few steps away from his front door.
“Yifan, I…”
“No, wait. Tell me this, did you come into our shop because you… because Minseok told you to…”
Frustratingly it was in that moment that words failed him once again, but Yixing seemed to catch up all on his own, as his eyes widened with something closely resembling true horror just a second later.
“No!” The loud shout had a passerby walking his dog looking at the duo in alarm, but neither of them paid him any attention as Yixing hurried to give his explanation. “I promise, I never even knew about the rivalry between Minseok and Jongdae until I overheard Luhan asking Minseok about it a few weeks ago. There are several reasons why I like to come in every morning and not one of them has anything to do with Minseok.”
Yifan felt some of the tension melting out of his shoulders at Yixing’s sincere tone and the pleading way he was looking up at him.
“Jongdae’s food is delicious, but mostly I just really like seeing you every day. You’re this really tall and good-looking guy, but instead of behaving like a self-involved prick, you’ve been incredibly cute from the moment I met you. Do you even have the slightest idea how endearing your clumsiness is?”
Yifan still remembered their first meeting clearly. He had been hauling supplies from a delivery into the store room at the back, when Yixing entered the bakery for the first time and almost dropped the sack of flour on his feet. He guessed he should be happy the Chinese man thought of his dumb behavior as cute, rather than embarrassing, but his male pride was still smarting at the abuse.
It was also partly at fault for the reason it took his brain so long to catch up with Yixing’s words. Tall, good-looking, cute.
“Are you flirting with me?”
The words barely left his lips and Yifan already wanted to slap himself. Or dig a hole and bury himself in it, even though the notion of turning around, stepping onto the street and walking into oncoming traffic sounded extremely tempting as well. Especially considering the way Yixing was looking up at him, gaze intently fixed on his, expression completely unreadable and tongue peeking out to swipe his full lower lip.
It was all Yixing’s fault anyway. He had been bombarding Yifan with one ridiculous question after another all evening, never bothering with boundaries and propriety and now it seemed as if he had infected Yifan with his outrageous straight-forwardness. Or maybe the weirdly entertaining interrogation of the past hours had simply eroded the last pathetic remains of his brain-to-mouth filter.
“So you didn’t notice? I’ve been flirting with you since the beginning. I don’t usually make a habit out of inviting random people out for dinner, you know?”
“Oh. Wow.”
Looking back at this moment Yifan would undoubtedly congratulate himself on that savvy reaction, but right then and there he was too distracted by the way Yixing was slowly stepping closer.
“You just asked me two questions in a row. It’s only fair that I get the chance to ask another one as well.”
Something about the tone in Yixing’s voice had Yifan’s stomach clenching tight and he found himself just nodding mindlessly.
A deep, indrawn breath and then…
“Can I kiss you?”
Holy shit.
For several seconds Yifan was completely sure he had finally lost it, was hallucinating and hearing strange voices in his head. There was no way he had just heard Yixing right, so he simply kept on staring at the smaller man in front of him, mind reeling, heart beating somewhere in the vicinity of his throat and mouth opening and closing without a sound coming out. Something he should be grateful for, after all he was sure he wouldn’t have been able to produce anything but pathetic gargling and choking noises. He was almost too preoccupied with his rapidly progressing mental breakdown to notice the distress dawning on Yixing’s face. Almost.
But something about the way he was biting down on his full lower lip, about the mix of hurt and embarrassment flickering in his expressive eyes, managed to pierce through the haze of disbelieve and stupidity.
The almost scared expression on Yixing’s face had Yifan’s feeling like an a-class asshole and stomach roiling in a way that had nothing to do with the amount of food he had just eaten for dinner. His gawking, had to be looking like a horrified reaction to Yixing, rather than the simple inability to deal with one of his most deeply buried wishes coming true.
But it took Yixing attempting to take a nearly defeated step back, to finally have Yifan moving, as realization settled in that the younger was about to pull away, when all he wanted was to have the other even closer.
Hand closing effortlessly around the thinner wrist, Yifan held him right where he stood and Yixing’s gaze snapped back up to his face.
“Yes. Yes you can kiss me. I… I really want you to.”
The three rapid blinks of Yixing’s stunned-looking eyes felt like they stretched over an eternity, but then his upturned face was flooded with a look of such enormous relief and joy, Yifan was leaning closer without the conscious decision to do so, drawn in by a force he didn’t even understand himself.
Breathing became difficult as Yixing raised his hand and carefully cupped the side of his neck, thumb stroking along the line of his jaw, with warmth spreading under his touch. Yifan actually felt his breath catch in his suddenly tight throat and even though the pressure was slight, he readily followed the other’s silent order to lean down farther. The first brush of their lips had his mind going blank and both of them pressing closer for a deeper touch. It didn’t long.
Yifan had absolutely no idea how it happened. One second they were ‘just’ kissing and the next Yixing slipped his hand into Yifan’s hair, fingers tightening in the blonde strands and his body simply short-circuited. He wasn’t even sure who moved first, but suddenly he had Yixing pressed up against his front door, with the smaller man feeding a sound, so needy, so utterly beautiful into his mouth, it was almost enough to distract him from the press of the other’s lips, the glide of Yixing’s tongue against his own. But even though the encouraging mewls were highly distracting, the tightening of Yixing’s fist in his hair, the maddening way he arched into the weight of Yifan’s body and the fleeting, but sharp tug on his bottom lip yanked at his focus and control just the same. So he indulged himself and let his hand brush down Yixing’s sides, committing the feeling and shapes of him to memory, reveling in the tiny shudders his touch inflicted.
When they both ran out of breath, with no choice but to pull away from each other, Yifan pressed his forehead against Yixing’s and simply breathed. With hot puffs of air hitting their wet and kiss-swollen lips, Yifan fought to regain a smidgen of sanity, but found his efforts going up in smoke when Yixing pulled him back in just seconds later with the insistent hand on the back of his head.
He wasn’t sure if he had ever kissed someone, had ever been kissed like this before. This wasn’t just another step in a well-known dance, not just the means to an end in a rush to the finish line. Lust and need might have been a heavy, hot weight in his gut, skin and senses alive under the other’s touch, but Yifan knew that, for once, it wasn’t all about that. This was kissing for the sake of kissing, for the sake of feeling the other against him. He just wanted to keep him close and the way Yixing clung to him, kept that hand possessively cupped over his nape, told him he probably wasn’t the only one.
Times slow, times urgent brushes of lips, the melding of hot breaths, the searching press of their bodies and tangling of tongues as Yifan licked deeper into Yixing’s mouth and swallowed his breathy sigh, it simply made it impossible to think straight. And the way Yixing slipped his free hand under his shirt and pressed it against his back, fingers feeling almost cool against his overheated skin, certainly didn’t help. Not one little bit.
“I think you might want to continue this inside, don’t you?”
The unexpected, but cursedly familiar voice had Yifan jerking away from Yixing with so much force, he actually stumbled two steps back before he managed to regain his balance and find his footing. Wheeling around he met the way too delighted gaze of his neighbor, Mrs. Song and the heat in his body turned into an almost sickening kind of dread. Dressed in a flowery frock, gray hair permed to perfection and small eyes shining with obvious delight, her sight was enough to instill undiluted terror in him. With good reason.
“I worried about you, Yifan. You’ve been alone for so long, it’s good to finally see you bring someone home with you. And such a handsome gentleman at that. He has kind eyes, better keep him close before someone else snatches him up”, his neighbor sing-songed, more than satisfied with her little speech and all Yifan could do was stand there and pray to be hit by lightning. Anything to deliver him from this humiliation.
But then he heard Yixing’s laugh, a happy, obviously amused sound and when he turned back around to look at the man who had completely scrambled his brains just a minute ago, it became clear that he wasn’t nearly as bothered by the situation as Yifan was. Quite the opposite actually, if the adorable crinkling of his eyes was anything to go by.
“Thank you, ma’am. I’ll be sure to remind him of that”, the younger replied with a bright smile and teasing side-glance at Yifan. And the tall blonde felt something stutter in his chest that had nothing to do with panic or embarrassment.
“Well, I won’t keep you two lovebirds any longer. Because I’m sure kind eyes aren’t your only assets. I might be old and half blind, but even I can see that’s a very nice pair of thighs you have there. Enjoy your youth, dearies.”
And with a last, very disturbing wink the old woman unlocked her door and entered her home, leaving Yifan with a stronger urge to be buried alive than ever before.
“I won’t hold it against you if you decide you never want to see me again”, Yifan finally forced out between numb lips, hoping to break the horrible silence between them with his poor attempt at humor. But when Yixing replied, his tone was completely serious.
“Actually, I really want to stay. I want to stay so much”, for the first time Yixing’s voice sounded almost vulnerable. “And that’s why I really think I should go. This isn’t something I want to mess up and rush too much. Well… at least not more than we already have.”
That last part was mumbled into his shoulder as he averted his face, probably in an attempt to hide the blush on his cheeks and the strange clenching in Yifan’s chest returned full-force, even more powerful than before.
There were things he needed to say. How much all of this confused him, how unexpected it was and that despite all that, he really wanted Yixing to stay as well. Preferably forever. And that just scared the hell out of him.
But all that came out was a hoarse “yeah”. It sounded choked up even to his own ears, but something in his eyes must have conveyed some of the turmoil inside of him, some of the words he was unable to get out, because Yixing’s unstrung features softened and tension melted out of him on a sigh.
Stepping up to Yifan and pressing a chaste kiss to his lips, Yixing stroked his fingers over his jaw one last time, before he pulled back with a small smile.
“Good night, Yifan.”
He was about to turn around, when Yifan reached for his arm and carefully closed his hand around his wrist again.
“See you tomorrow?”
Two slow blinks and a dazzling smile bloomed on Yixing’s face. That was when leaning down to steal another quick kiss became a necessity, rather than a choice.
Yixing’s answering “Yeah, see you tomorrow” was whispered against kiss-swollen lips.
∞
Over the course of the night, Yifan had somehow managed to talk himself into a state of near hysteria, scenarios of Yixing realizing that he was simply too awkward or just not worth the trouble after all, exploding in his mind and he was pacing back and forth behind the counter of the bakery, earning a part judging, part worried glance from Jongdae before the thin man vanished into the back rooms to prepare more trays of muffins and cream cheese tarts. So when the bell over the door gave its usual merry tinkle just five minutes after they opened for the day and had Yifan looking up to see Yixing entering the shop, maybe a bit more hesitantly than usual, he was ready to jump over the counter and throw himself at the man.
Luckily he had more control than that, so he settled for a very controlled “You’re early today”. He felt almost proud of himself.
“I might have been a bit too eager to see you again and left home a lot earlier than usual.”
The fidgety admission had the last knot of anxiousness loosening and warmth spreading in Yifan’s chest and even though he didn’t notice the smile softening the stern lines of his face, Yixing certainly did.
“Come here.”
The Chinese man followed his low-pitched order without hesitation, stepping up to the counter and eyes never leaving Yifan’s face. Meanwhile Yifan was already leaning forward, while the other was still moving and by the time he came to a stop, with nothing but the wooden counter between them, he was close enough to press a soft kiss to his lips.
He wasn’t sure who was more surprised, Yixing or himself, but just a second later the smaller breathed out on a happy hum, his hand returning to its already familiar place at the back of his head, and it became clear that both of them were more than just fine with Yifan’s uncharacteristically bold behavior.
But of course it was too good to last.
Disaster struck, just seconds later, in the form of Oh Sehun and nothing but Oh Sehun.
“So let me get this straight. I can’t even bring one of Minseok’s to-go cups in here, but it’s perfectly alright for you kiss and make googly eyes at one of his employees?”
He would have definitely bolted around the counter and clamped a hand over the kid’s way too big and dangerous mouth, if it weren’t for…
“Explain.”
… that.
The single word was enough to turn Yifan’s insides to ice, rigid body failing to cooperate as he slowly turned around to find Jongdae standing in the doorway to the backrooms, cutting gaze zeroed in on Yixing and him with their faces just inches apart from each other.
He was going to kill Sehun. But only if he managed to survive the next ten minutes.
For: hidden_onigiri
Word count: 8000~
Rating: PG-13
Summary: No one had warned Yifan that working at a bakery would be this problematic.
Disaster struck at exactly 9.17am in the form of Oh Sehun and a vividly blue coffee-to-go cup.
It was Yifan’s turn to help out behind the counter and he and Jongdae had just weathered the first rush of the day, workers and students with early classes at the nearby college swarming their little bakery to get their breakfast and possibly stock up on lunch. He had just finished refilling the beverage cooler and was now taking inventory, trying to decide of which other baked goods Jongdae would have to make another batch in the back rooms - realizing they were dangerously low on his business partner’s infamous triple chocolate muffins - when the shop door opened to the merry tinkling of the bell above the entrance.
Yifan didn’t have to look up to know who had just entered the bakery, recognizing the two bickering voices immediately, one slightly nasal, while the other hid the tiniest of lisps, barely audible unless excitement, irritation or nervousness got the better of its owner.
And Yifan almost wished he had kept his attention focused on arranging the huckleberry-lime-croissants, when he finally looked up to see Tao and Sehun approaching the lower, wooden counter between the display cases, obviously focused on finding the most painful way to jab their elbow into each other’s side. But that wasn’t what had him whirling around with alarm flaring up inside of him, just to make sure that Jongdae wasn’t actually approaching and be given the chance to discover the thing in Sehun’s hand.
The blue thing. The blue thing that looked suspiciously like a to-go cup from the one coffee shop Jongdae despised more than anything else in this world. Even though it would probably be more accurate to mention that his friend didn’t so much have a problem with the coffee shop itself, but rather with its small, energetic owner.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing with that in here? Do you have a death wish?! Turn around and get rid of it”, Yifan hissed, careful not to raise his voice too much. The last thing he needed was for Jongdae to hear him and come out from where he was busy baking in the back rooms of their shop. Dealing with his business partner’s black mood for the rest of the day wasn’t something he was looking forward to.
He had honestly expected Sehun to do as he had been told, thought the younger had just been distracted and forgotten that these particular cups were banned goods in here. What he definitely didn’t expect was for Sehun to protectively hug the paper cup to his chest and give him a scandalized glare from beneath his wind-blown fringe.
“No! Luhan made this for me. There’s no way I’ll throw this away, not until I finish every last sip!”
Yifan had no idea who that Luhan-person was, but he knew he had to make that coffee cup disappear. And fast.
“Then drink up and throw it away! Why bring it in here? You know how Jongdae gets!”
The look on the younger’s face told him he wasn’t overly concerned about that right now. Instead he glanced down at the coffee in his hands with a mixture of adoration and suffering.
“I can’t. I just drank 5 cups of coffee. If I drink any more right now I’ll barf.”
Yifan wasn’t entirely sure what to call his own reaction to those words. There was plenty of confusion and perplexity, slight amusement despite the threat of a crisis and just a hint of fascination at Sehun’s utterly carefree attitude. In short, just the usual mix of emotions everyone who dealt with the young blonde man experienced on a regular basis.
“Then why did you even get a sixth cup in the first place?”
At that Tao, who had been suspiciously quiet ever since entering the bakery a few minutes ago, finally made his presence known again with a short, derisive snort.
“Because he’s an idiot, that’s why.”
Apart from an almost indiscernible narrowing of his eyes, Sehun pointedly ignored his best friend, long slim fingers playing with the cream white lid of the cup in his hands.
“Well, you see, Minseok has these two new workers at his coffee shop”, Yifan threw a quick, cautious glance over his shoulder at the wholly unconcerned mentioning of him-who-must-not-be-named, “both Chinese and cute as hell and he gets along suspiciously well with the new barista, so I had to investigate.”
Even more lost than before, Yifan just stared at the blonde college kid, but carefully stored away the information about Minseok’s two new employees. It would be easier to keep the information away from Jongdae if he knew what to look out for.
“Investigate what? And what does that even have to do with you chugging coffee as if you’re preparing for an all-nighter right before finals?”
The sigh and half-pitying, half-disbelieving look Sehun gave him, suddenly made him feel a lot older than his 26 years. But then the brat tended to have that effect on him.
“I had to find out if Minseok and Luhan, that’s the new barista by the way, we finally chatted for a while and he told me his name, are just really fast, overly affectionate friends or if there’s more going on between them. What else would I be investigating? Interior design?
“Your major is architecture. That possibility shouldn’t be as far-fetched as you’re making it out to be”, Tao threw in from the side, making his best friend pull a face at him, before Sehun turned back towards Yifan with a haughty sniff.
“Anyway, I needed a good reason to stay and observe, so I acted as if I were desperate to finishing a paper and ordered a new drink like every 20 minutes. Because there’s nothing more obnoxious when it comes to coffee shops than those people that order only one little drink and stay for hours. The last thing I want is for Luhan to think I’m one of those people.”
“So instead you faked a coffee addiction?”
“It gives me a plausible excuse to come back whenever I want. And Luhan drinks coffee like water, he’ll understand. Maybe we can even bond over it or something like that”, the young man answered with a far-away, almost dreamy expression on his usually stoic face. It was more than just slightly disconcerting.
“And?”
It took a while for Sehun to face him, as if Yifan had pulled him out of an especially vivid daydream - and wow, that was definitely something he didn’t want to think about - but eventually the college kid returned his attention to Yifan. He could practically see the big question mark floating over his head.
“And what?”
“Is there more going on between them?”
“Inconclusive”, Sehun answered with a very displeased expression. “I’ll have to investigate further. But Luhan smiled at me - four times. And he recommended me this drink, it’s Luhan’s favorite by the way and Luhan-“
“For God’s sake, would you stop mentioning his name every five seconds?! Just because you finally managed to find out, doesn’t mean we need to hear it all the time”, came Tao’s hissed exclamation from the sidelines.
“Don’t mind him. He just has his panties in a twist because he saw the TA he has a gigantic crush on, on a date with a girl yesterday evening”, Sehun explained, waving the matter away with a careless flick of his wrist and one look at Tao and his clenched teeth, told Yifan he was about one more sentence away from a big blow-up.
All the more reason to get the two young men’s orders and hurry them along, because 1) a hysteric Tao was never a good idea, and 2) Sehun was still standing in the middle of the shop, holding that damned blue paper cup, when Jongdae could step out of the back rooms any second now.
“Alright, what can I get you? I’m sure you have somewhere else to be.”
But before they could even open their mouths, Yifan heard the eerily pleasant voice of his business partner from behind him. It had the fine hairs on the back of his neck standing up and heart seizing up with terror as his flight instinct kicked in with full force.
“No, stay. Stay and tell me more about Minseok and his two new employees. It sounds like thrilling news.”
Jongdae.
They were so screwed.
∞
Yifan wasn’t proud of it, but he only got through the remainder of the day, by escaping and locking himself into the little office on the second floor of the shop as soon as Baekhyun started his regular shift at ten and took over Yifan’s position behind the counter. He felt almost guilty for leaving the poor guy with Jongdae in one of his dangerously foul moods, but his survival instinct won out over pity any day of the week. He avoided any further contact by claiming he was too busy with finishing up their monthly statement for May - which wasn’t actually a lie, just slightly exaggerated as he was practically done with it - and spent the rest of his work day crunching numbers and sending out supply orders. That was the reason Jongdae had taken him onboard after all. Where Jongdae had perceived book keeping and the rest of the - quote Jongdae - ‘administrative crap’ as a thorn in his side and a pesky distraction from baking, Yifan and his business degree had always been way better with numbers than people. He was the numbers-guy, there to keep an eye on their quite respectable profit, make sure their bills were paid, take care of advertisement, deal with large-scale orders of their baked goods and all the various administrative matters and put a stop to it if Jongdae’s new recipes and creations got a bit too extravagant for their budget. He liked it. And he was good at it.
It was after 7pm by the time, he finally finished up the work he had gathered in a desperate attempt to keep himself busy and dared to step a foot out of his office. Downstairs Baekhyun was in the middle of the daily clean-up, busy closing up the shop and Yifan could hear Jongdae working in the back rooms, probably busy baking in his Sehun-fuelled rage. The look Baekhyun sent him from across the room was a mix of betrayed trust, condemnation and suffering.
“Coward.”
It stung, but said cowardice had kept him mostly unscathed and out of the danger zone, so he wasn’t very successful in scraping up a lot of genuine regret or chagrin. Instead he made his farewells with what he hoped was an appropriately sheepish expression and called out a quick and safe good-bye to Jongdae, leaving quickly, just in case his business partner decided to pause his baking and try to confront him once again.
The evening was pleasantly warm, as Yifan stepped out onto the busy street. There were people and students on their way home from work and evening classes, men, women and kids seated in flocks at the outdoor tables of the restaurants and cafés and stragglers flitting in and out of the few shops that were still open. Yifan could have taken the bus to the train station that held at the curb practically right in front of their bakery, but as usual he preferred to walk.
Just a few minutes later, he hiked up the stairs to the train platform, stiff muscles from sitting all day long finally loosened a bit and problems at work almost forgotten, but the staticy announcement that was made over the speakers just seconds later, had his good mood flat-lining before it was even over.
That was until he noticed the man standing several feet away from him.
Yifan didn’t think Jongdae would appreciate the irony that it was in fact the blue paper cup that caught his attention in the first place and had him taking a closer look at the man holding it. Trained to spot the ‘dangerous’ cups, so he could direct Jongdae’s attention elsewhere, until they were safely out of sight, and avoid potentially catastrophic fallouts, it was practically impossible not to notice it and its owner. Of medium height, maybe on the smaller side, slender build and with deep auburn hair that looked almost red in the glare of the fluorescent overhead lights, the man was dressed in black jeans, a light gray shirt and a dark green hoodie. Like a lot of the other people on the crowded platform he was looking up at one of the mid-sized screens showing the announcements about the malfunctioning railway switch, cancelled trains and the subsequent replacement buses, but instead of the annoyance the other commuters and passengers wore on their frazzled faces, his was clearly dominated by confusion, eyes blinking rapidly and brows pulled together in a slight frown.
Recognition and that familiar mix of excitement and nervousness set in within moments of each other.
Zhang Yixing.
Zhang Yixing and his pretty smile, endearing dimples and unpredictable breakfast choices. The other man visited their bakery almost daily, at 6.30 am sharp, all sleepy eyes, messy hair and lazy smiles, and Yifan had never seen him order the same thing twice in a row. And he always left his emotions in a chaotic tumble of elation, confusion and the sharp bite of hopeless longing. Yifan wasn’t the overly graceful type, limbs too long and his lack in coordination certainly didn’t make up for them, but whenever Yixing was in the same room, he felt as if he had been just dragged out of bed after a mere 3 hours of sleep, nothing but fumbling hands, clumsy steps and an alarmingly muddled brain, too focused on the man in front of him, to concentrate on his own actions. He just always felt that odd desperation to soak up every second of the other’s company across the counter, because just a few, way too short moments later, Yixing would be gone with an easy smile, curious tilt of his head and an adorably accented “See you tomorrow”.
So encountering him so suddenly left him at a bit of a loss, caught somewhere between wanting to walk up to him and bolt in the other direction.
Yifan didn’t realize he had already made his decision until he was about five steps away from Yixing and as if the other man had sensed his approach - or simply been alerted by the sound of his feet hitting the pavement - Yixing turned around just as the blonde came to a careful stop in front of him. One slow blink, a second one and suddenly the frown melted off Yixing’s face, to turn into an almost blinding smile. The gentle tug of his lips hit Yifan like a punch to the chest, lack of breath and tightening of his throat included.
“Yifan.”
Unlike with English words, Yixing’s accent wrapped comfortably around Yifan’s name, the difference to the careful way he spoke his words when using the still unfamiliar language almost striking. To Yifan it had always seemed as if his name was made to be used by the Chinese man. It didn’t make dealing with him any easier.
“Hey, you looked a bit lost, so I thought I’d come over and ask if you needed any help translating that”, he managed to press out, hand pointing in the general direction of the monitor, as he congratulated himself on the seemingly casual sound of his voice, when his insides were actually an unfortunate clash of nerves and eagerness.
“Yeah, I do. I’ve been here for months now and my English has gotten a lot better. But this is still too hard for me. I have no idea what’s going on, except that there won’t be any east-bound trains and something about busses.”
He looked almost grumpy as he grudgingly admitted to being in need of some assistance and Yifan made another discovery about the other man. He looked ridiculously adorable with a frown pulling at his brows and lips pushing out in an almost-pout.
“There’s a technical problem, so we’ll have to take the busses they organized instead.”
“I should have been able to understand that. It’s not that complicated.”
“You’ll get there”, Yifan hurriedly consoled him. “You’re already so good at English. You should hear me try to speak Chinese. It’s a tragedy.”
And in that moment, with another smile blooming on Yixing’s face, Yifan was almost grateful for disappointing his grandmother and failing to master the language of his ancestors, if it meant cheering the other up.
“I didn’t even know you took the train. I’ve never seen you here before”, Yifan remarked, as they made their way to the bus stop on the street below.
“I could use the bus to get home, but I like walking across the university campus, so I usually take the train.”
“I see.”
And with that he was at the end of his impressive repertoire of small talk topics, unless he wanted to mention the weather, which he didn’t. Luckily the bus pulled in at the stop just as they reached the landing of the stairs and they hurried forward to avoid having to wait for the next one. Boarding the bus behind Yixing, they made it about halfway down the aisle when they came to a halt again, squished up cozily to the people in front and behind them. From the front of the bus he heard displeased complaints and the harried busdriver’s “I’m sorry, the bus is full. There will be another one coming in a few minutes.”
Not bothering with any of the handles, Yifan just grabbed the overhead bar and watched as Yixing shuffled around until he was facing him again, which would have been fine, if it weren’t for the fact that they were now close to being completely plastered up against each other. Just a few short seconds into the ride and it already left Yifan with a slightly light-headed feeling that had absolutely nothing to do with the stagnant air in the packed vehicle, but rather with the proximity of Yixing’s body and upturned face. Raising his head to look over the huddled crowd of commuters, just so he had something to distract him from how thick Yixing’s lashes looked from this close, Yifan tried to come up with something to say, but found himself coming up completely empty handed. It was disillusioning to realize that this was enough to turn him useless and tongue-tied.
The most puzzling thing about this though, was the fact that his paralyzing attraction to Yixing didn’t even make all that much sense. He didn’t come anywhere close to resembling his usual type. All his life Yifan had dated and pursued the tall, long-legged type. Men and women that were interested in fashion or literature, often both, with calm and serious personalities that matched Yifan’s wish for quiet and mostly drama-free relationships.
And now there was Yixing, small, always dressed casually and for comfort, rather than style, completely disinterested in reading, since he, according to his own words, ‘could never focus on the plot long enough to finish a book’ and the farthest thing from serious he had ever encountered.
It confused Yifan, made him even more nervous in the other’s presence, as if it wasn’t already bad enough.
At the same time he had to admit that his attraction wasn’t actually that surprising. Not when Yixing’s casual clothing style involved low-cut tanks and shirts that provided Yifan with utterly distracting peeks of milky skin and collarbones. Not when that cheerful, constantly distracted personality offered so many small, but fascinating insights into a complex and colorful character. He never felt calm or relaxed in the other’s company, but there had also never been a second of boredom. After all it was pretty much impossible to feel bored when you had to constantly concentrate on not embarrassing yourself, while simultaneously focusing on whatever delightfully random snippet of information Yixing would reveal next.
During all of Yixing’s visits at the bakery, Yifan had collected quite the impressive array of facts about him.
He never paid with coins, even though the jingling and bulging of his wallet indicated that he never had a shortage of those.
He disliked green food with a passion, even going as far as picking the green apples from Jongdae’s apple-carrot tarts, much to the horror of his business partner.
He was extremely skilled at drawing, a talent Yifan envied fiercely and was reminded of every time he looked at the sketch of himself as a dragon that Jongdae had framed and hung on the wall behind the counter. It hadn’t taken Yixing more than ten minutes to draw Yifan’s portrait on the napkin, face pulled into what Jongdae liked to call his ‘perpetually grumpy default expression’, as he spit fire at one of their especially obnoxious and demanding regulars.
There was more of course, just little habits and things he had picked up on, like the way Yixing bit down on his lower lip whenever he couldn’t quite decide what to order, his habit of tilting his head when people used English words he didn’t know or simply spoke too fast for him to understand or the fact that there were always headphones slung around his neck or hanging from his neckline.
It almost seemed as if every of Yixing’s visits to the bakery revealed another thing about him and as Yifan finally dared to look down at the other man again, he realized he couldn’t wait to find out more.
That was when he noticed the familiar row of houses passing by the window. He had actually spent the last seven minutes too caught up in his own thoughts, instead of making the best out of this chance meeting and talking to Yixing and now he had to get off the bus at the next stop. He was incredibly tempted to hiss out a vicious curse, but changed his mind when he noticed a pig-tailed, little girl staring up at him from her perch on her mother’s lap. So he simply turned back to Yixing with a sigh.
“This is my stop.”
The other’s eyes blinked up at him with obvious surprise and another unidentifiable emotion, but before either of them could say more, the bus was pulling into the stop and Yifan had to get off, Yixing right behind him as several more people tried to make their way out onto the pavement.
“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow”, Yifan made his grudging farewells, strangely unwilling to part with the smaller man.
“Actually”, Yixing began hesitantly, an unusual look of indecision on his face and Yifan half expected him to say that he wasn’t going to make it to the bakery the next day. Instead he received the surprise of his life, as he listened to the other issue an invitation he would have never expected. “I know this great Italian place just a few blocks away. Do you want to get dinner?”
∞
And that was how Yifan found himself at a window table in one of his favorite restaurants, a steaming plate of risotto in front of him and Yixing seated across the table, smiling broadly as he finished his account of the impromptu indoor-soccer tournament his co-worker and their boss had started during a lull at work that day, scaring some of their customers half to death in the process. Yifan didn’t know any of the people he was talking about, but his enthusiasm and lively gestures had him smiling along like the infatuated idiot he was. Which was probably why it took him a while to notice the almost taxing look the other was giving him.
“What?”
“Let’s play a game.”
The unexpected suggestion had Yifan looking up from his seafood risotto with a raised eyebrow. “A game?”
“Mhm”, Yixing hummed in confirmation and Yifan wasn’t entirely sure if he really, really loved or feared the smile on lips, as the mischievous glint the smaller’s eyes had him questioning whether he would be able to get out of this with his already battered pride in one piece. He doubted it. At the same time though, his need to know what game Yixing had in mind was simply too strong to ignore.
“What kind of game?”
His suspicion must have been more than just obvious on his face, clearly lacing his voice, because just a second later Yixing’s small smile turned into a full-blown grin, amusement refusing to be contained, as his dimples made another appearance and had Yifan forgetting all about his gnawing misgivings.
“We take turn asking questions. We can ask whatever we want and there’s no passing, but…”, Yixing scooped a bit of pasta into his mouth and chewed slowly, clearly aiming for a dramatic break and succeeding spectacularly, since he had Yifan sitting at the edge of his seat by the time he finally continued explaining the rules. “We also have to give an answer to our own questions.”
It sounded like the perfect receipt for disaster and haunting humiliation. And somehow he found himself agreeing without more than a few seconds of hesitation, which should have probably worried him just as much as the impending questions thrown his way. Even Yixing seemed surprised by Yifan’s easy acquiescence, but recovered before the tall blonde got the chance to change his mind.
“Alright, I’ll go first. Are you attracted to men or women?”
The straightforward question had Yifan feeling grateful for not taking a bite of risotto, as he would have undoubtedly choked on it. As it was, he just felt his eyes widening slightly and heat shooting into his face.
“Uhm… I dated both, but I’m more often attracted to men, I guess.”
It sounded more like a question, but Yixing seemed satisfied, as he simply nodded and gave his own answer. “I’m gay.”
Just like that. No fidgeting, no avoidance of Yifan’s gaze or hasty explanations, nothing more than his distinct reply and it had the taller feeling like an adolescent kid for making such a fuss before.
“Your turn.”
Busy with trying not to let the revelation of Yixing’s sexuality get to his head, he blurted out the first, amazingly boring question that came to mind.
“If you could go to another country right now, which one would it be?”
The look Yixing gave him couldn’t have spelled “you can do better than this” more strongly, but he answered the question without protest.
“Belgium.”
Yifan wasn’t even surprised that the answer made no sense to him. He had expected China or some exotic holiday destination, instead he had gotten what he was pretty sure was a small country in Europe.
“Why?”
Yixing just gave a little shrug. “It sounds nice. What about you?”
“Canada.” This time even he had gotten the answer out without delay. “My family lives there and I really miss them sometimes.”
He thought Yixing would press him for more information and he braced himself for the uncomfortable questions - his family was something he didn’t really like to talk about, so he had no idea why he had even mentioned them in the first place - but the man opposite him just gave another short nod and continued with their game.
“What is something you’re really good and something you’re really bad at?”
The relief that poured through him wasn’t just due the fact that it was finally an easy question to answer. “Mental math. I’ve had a talent for it since I was young. And I’m really, really bad at dancing. I’m a safety hazard for the people around me.”
“Can’t say I’m surprised”, came Yixing’s clearly amused reply and had Yifan giving him an insulted frown. “I’m very good at chopping vegetables. I’m like one of those miracle gadgets in the TV commercials. And I’m really bad at remembering where I put my keys. Yesterday I looked for them for an hour and finally found them in the fridge next to the carton of milk I bought on my way home from work.”
He was pretty sure the funny fluttering in his chest was not a normal reaction to Yixing’s words. Laughter, yes. Teasing, sure. But not the strong urge to get up and pull the auburn haired man into a hug that would be too tight and long to pass as ‘friendly’.
He fired out his next question to distract himself from the weird sensation and Yixing told him how he had always wanted to become a singer as a child, while Yifan’s “Michael Jordan” made his dinner companion snort into his glass of water.
After that Yixing asked after an unusual turn-off and Yifan’s answer of “the sounds people make while eating” had Yixing freezing with his fork suspended somewhere between his mouth and plate, before announcing that he really hated it when someone touched his feet.
It went back and forth like that, with Yixing asking one borderline-outrageous or difficult question after another and Yifan trying to keep up. Surprisingly though, Yifan realized while their empty dessert plates were cleared off the table that he had actually started feeling comfortable at one point during their playful interrogation, too amused and intrigued to worry about saying the wrong thing or making a fool out of himself. Which was probably the reason he almost got caught by Yixing’s next question.
“What’s your favorite sexual position?”
Yifan already had his mouth open to answer the question when realization hit and he clamped it back shut with a strangled sound of shock. On the other side of the table Yixing was laughing so hard, he actually tipped back in his chair and almost didn’t manage to regain his balance. The tall Canadian wasn’t quite as amused.
“I’ll save that question for another time then.”
∞
“Alright, I guess we have time for one last question. Make it a good one”, Yixing announced from where he was walking a few inches beside Yifan. They had left the restaurant shortly before, after realizing that they had spent more than two hours over dinner, dessert and their questions, to Yixing’s announcement that he would walk him home. Yifan hadn’t even put up a token protest, not when this would give him a few more minutes in the other’s company.
“Tell me something about you that you don’t want me to know.”
The small sound of surprise had Yifan looking over at Yixing and coming to the astonishing realization that he had finally asked a question the other wasn’t entirely non-chalant about. The smaller was biting down on his lower lip once more, gaze flitting up to Yifan’s before he quickly averted it again and his slim fingers were curling into the green fabric of his hoodie. He looked a bit like the moment he had asked Yifan out for dinner - unsure, worried, braced for rejection.
“Alright, I should have probably told you this a lot sooner.”
The brief silence that followed had Yifan’s over-active imagination coming up with one bone-chilling scenario after another. He had a boyfriend or terminal disease, he was returning to China, he…
“I work at Minseok’s coffee shop.”
He worked at Minseok’s coffee shop.
The words had him freezing mid step, eyes widening as he watched consternation, nervousness and mild dread flickering across the auburn haired man’s face. He exploded just as the other opened his mouth.
“This so typical! I meet a great guy and he just happens to be working for the arch enemy of my business partner. Go figure”, Yifan cursed as he finally started moving again, determinedly stomping forward and paying no attention to his surrounding until he heard the other’s quiet voice from beside him.
“So you still think I’m a great guy?”
Yifan opened his mouth to tell him that that wasn’t even the point, not when he was risking his life, just by walking next to Minseok’s employee, because if Jongdae ever found out he would be dead meat, but then realization hit that he had actually been talking aloud during his rant and he simply closed his eyes with a defeated groan.
He didn’t utter another word until they came to a stop just a few steps away from his front door.
“Yifan, I…”
“No, wait. Tell me this, did you come into our shop because you… because Minseok told you to…”
Frustratingly it was in that moment that words failed him once again, but Yixing seemed to catch up all on his own, as his eyes widened with something closely resembling true horror just a second later.
“No!” The loud shout had a passerby walking his dog looking at the duo in alarm, but neither of them paid him any attention as Yixing hurried to give his explanation. “I promise, I never even knew about the rivalry between Minseok and Jongdae until I overheard Luhan asking Minseok about it a few weeks ago. There are several reasons why I like to come in every morning and not one of them has anything to do with Minseok.”
Yifan felt some of the tension melting out of his shoulders at Yixing’s sincere tone and the pleading way he was looking up at him.
“Jongdae’s food is delicious, but mostly I just really like seeing you every day. You’re this really tall and good-looking guy, but instead of behaving like a self-involved prick, you’ve been incredibly cute from the moment I met you. Do you even have the slightest idea how endearing your clumsiness is?”
Yifan still remembered their first meeting clearly. He had been hauling supplies from a delivery into the store room at the back, when Yixing entered the bakery for the first time and almost dropped the sack of flour on his feet. He guessed he should be happy the Chinese man thought of his dumb behavior as cute, rather than embarrassing, but his male pride was still smarting at the abuse.
It was also partly at fault for the reason it took his brain so long to catch up with Yixing’s words. Tall, good-looking, cute.
“Are you flirting with me?”
The words barely left his lips and Yifan already wanted to slap himself. Or dig a hole and bury himself in it, even though the notion of turning around, stepping onto the street and walking into oncoming traffic sounded extremely tempting as well. Especially considering the way Yixing was looking up at him, gaze intently fixed on his, expression completely unreadable and tongue peeking out to swipe his full lower lip.
It was all Yixing’s fault anyway. He had been bombarding Yifan with one ridiculous question after another all evening, never bothering with boundaries and propriety and now it seemed as if he had infected Yifan with his outrageous straight-forwardness. Or maybe the weirdly entertaining interrogation of the past hours had simply eroded the last pathetic remains of his brain-to-mouth filter.
“So you didn’t notice? I’ve been flirting with you since the beginning. I don’t usually make a habit out of inviting random people out for dinner, you know?”
“Oh. Wow.”
Looking back at this moment Yifan would undoubtedly congratulate himself on that savvy reaction, but right then and there he was too distracted by the way Yixing was slowly stepping closer.
“You just asked me two questions in a row. It’s only fair that I get the chance to ask another one as well.”
Something about the tone in Yixing’s voice had Yifan’s stomach clenching tight and he found himself just nodding mindlessly.
A deep, indrawn breath and then…
“Can I kiss you?”
Holy shit.
For several seconds Yifan was completely sure he had finally lost it, was hallucinating and hearing strange voices in his head. There was no way he had just heard Yixing right, so he simply kept on staring at the smaller man in front of him, mind reeling, heart beating somewhere in the vicinity of his throat and mouth opening and closing without a sound coming out. Something he should be grateful for, after all he was sure he wouldn’t have been able to produce anything but pathetic gargling and choking noises. He was almost too preoccupied with his rapidly progressing mental breakdown to notice the distress dawning on Yixing’s face. Almost.
But something about the way he was biting down on his full lower lip, about the mix of hurt and embarrassment flickering in his expressive eyes, managed to pierce through the haze of disbelieve and stupidity.
The almost scared expression on Yixing’s face had Yifan’s feeling like an a-class asshole and stomach roiling in a way that had nothing to do with the amount of food he had just eaten for dinner. His gawking, had to be looking like a horrified reaction to Yixing, rather than the simple inability to deal with one of his most deeply buried wishes coming true.
But it took Yixing attempting to take a nearly defeated step back, to finally have Yifan moving, as realization settled in that the younger was about to pull away, when all he wanted was to have the other even closer.
Hand closing effortlessly around the thinner wrist, Yifan held him right where he stood and Yixing’s gaze snapped back up to his face.
“Yes. Yes you can kiss me. I… I really want you to.”
The three rapid blinks of Yixing’s stunned-looking eyes felt like they stretched over an eternity, but then his upturned face was flooded with a look of such enormous relief and joy, Yifan was leaning closer without the conscious decision to do so, drawn in by a force he didn’t even understand himself.
Breathing became difficult as Yixing raised his hand and carefully cupped the side of his neck, thumb stroking along the line of his jaw, with warmth spreading under his touch. Yifan actually felt his breath catch in his suddenly tight throat and even though the pressure was slight, he readily followed the other’s silent order to lean down farther. The first brush of their lips had his mind going blank and both of them pressing closer for a deeper touch. It didn’t long.
Yifan had absolutely no idea how it happened. One second they were ‘just’ kissing and the next Yixing slipped his hand into Yifan’s hair, fingers tightening in the blonde strands and his body simply short-circuited. He wasn’t even sure who moved first, but suddenly he had Yixing pressed up against his front door, with the smaller man feeding a sound, so needy, so utterly beautiful into his mouth, it was almost enough to distract him from the press of the other’s lips, the glide of Yixing’s tongue against his own. But even though the encouraging mewls were highly distracting, the tightening of Yixing’s fist in his hair, the maddening way he arched into the weight of Yifan’s body and the fleeting, but sharp tug on his bottom lip yanked at his focus and control just the same. So he indulged himself and let his hand brush down Yixing’s sides, committing the feeling and shapes of him to memory, reveling in the tiny shudders his touch inflicted.
When they both ran out of breath, with no choice but to pull away from each other, Yifan pressed his forehead against Yixing’s and simply breathed. With hot puffs of air hitting their wet and kiss-swollen lips, Yifan fought to regain a smidgen of sanity, but found his efforts going up in smoke when Yixing pulled him back in just seconds later with the insistent hand on the back of his head.
He wasn’t sure if he had ever kissed someone, had ever been kissed like this before. This wasn’t just another step in a well-known dance, not just the means to an end in a rush to the finish line. Lust and need might have been a heavy, hot weight in his gut, skin and senses alive under the other’s touch, but Yifan knew that, for once, it wasn’t all about that. This was kissing for the sake of kissing, for the sake of feeling the other against him. He just wanted to keep him close and the way Yixing clung to him, kept that hand possessively cupped over his nape, told him he probably wasn’t the only one.
Times slow, times urgent brushes of lips, the melding of hot breaths, the searching press of their bodies and tangling of tongues as Yifan licked deeper into Yixing’s mouth and swallowed his breathy sigh, it simply made it impossible to think straight. And the way Yixing slipped his free hand under his shirt and pressed it against his back, fingers feeling almost cool against his overheated skin, certainly didn’t help. Not one little bit.
“I think you might want to continue this inside, don’t you?”
The unexpected, but cursedly familiar voice had Yifan jerking away from Yixing with so much force, he actually stumbled two steps back before he managed to regain his balance and find his footing. Wheeling around he met the way too delighted gaze of his neighbor, Mrs. Song and the heat in his body turned into an almost sickening kind of dread. Dressed in a flowery frock, gray hair permed to perfection and small eyes shining with obvious delight, her sight was enough to instill undiluted terror in him. With good reason.
“I worried about you, Yifan. You’ve been alone for so long, it’s good to finally see you bring someone home with you. And such a handsome gentleman at that. He has kind eyes, better keep him close before someone else snatches him up”, his neighbor sing-songed, more than satisfied with her little speech and all Yifan could do was stand there and pray to be hit by lightning. Anything to deliver him from this humiliation.
But then he heard Yixing’s laugh, a happy, obviously amused sound and when he turned back around to look at the man who had completely scrambled his brains just a minute ago, it became clear that he wasn’t nearly as bothered by the situation as Yifan was. Quite the opposite actually, if the adorable crinkling of his eyes was anything to go by.
“Thank you, ma’am. I’ll be sure to remind him of that”, the younger replied with a bright smile and teasing side-glance at Yifan. And the tall blonde felt something stutter in his chest that had nothing to do with panic or embarrassment.
“Well, I won’t keep you two lovebirds any longer. Because I’m sure kind eyes aren’t your only assets. I might be old and half blind, but even I can see that’s a very nice pair of thighs you have there. Enjoy your youth, dearies.”
And with a last, very disturbing wink the old woman unlocked her door and entered her home, leaving Yifan with a stronger urge to be buried alive than ever before.
“I won’t hold it against you if you decide you never want to see me again”, Yifan finally forced out between numb lips, hoping to break the horrible silence between them with his poor attempt at humor. But when Yixing replied, his tone was completely serious.
“Actually, I really want to stay. I want to stay so much”, for the first time Yixing’s voice sounded almost vulnerable. “And that’s why I really think I should go. This isn’t something I want to mess up and rush too much. Well… at least not more than we already have.”
That last part was mumbled into his shoulder as he averted his face, probably in an attempt to hide the blush on his cheeks and the strange clenching in Yifan’s chest returned full-force, even more powerful than before.
There were things he needed to say. How much all of this confused him, how unexpected it was and that despite all that, he really wanted Yixing to stay as well. Preferably forever. And that just scared the hell out of him.
But all that came out was a hoarse “yeah”. It sounded choked up even to his own ears, but something in his eyes must have conveyed some of the turmoil inside of him, some of the words he was unable to get out, because Yixing’s unstrung features softened and tension melted out of him on a sigh.
Stepping up to Yifan and pressing a chaste kiss to his lips, Yixing stroked his fingers over his jaw one last time, before he pulled back with a small smile.
“Good night, Yifan.”
He was about to turn around, when Yifan reached for his arm and carefully closed his hand around his wrist again.
“See you tomorrow?”
Two slow blinks and a dazzling smile bloomed on Yixing’s face. That was when leaning down to steal another quick kiss became a necessity, rather than a choice.
Yixing’s answering “Yeah, see you tomorrow” was whispered against kiss-swollen lips.
∞
Over the course of the night, Yifan had somehow managed to talk himself into a state of near hysteria, scenarios of Yixing realizing that he was simply too awkward or just not worth the trouble after all, exploding in his mind and he was pacing back and forth behind the counter of the bakery, earning a part judging, part worried glance from Jongdae before the thin man vanished into the back rooms to prepare more trays of muffins and cream cheese tarts. So when the bell over the door gave its usual merry tinkle just five minutes after they opened for the day and had Yifan looking up to see Yixing entering the shop, maybe a bit more hesitantly than usual, he was ready to jump over the counter and throw himself at the man.
Luckily he had more control than that, so he settled for a very controlled “You’re early today”. He felt almost proud of himself.
“I might have been a bit too eager to see you again and left home a lot earlier than usual.”
The fidgety admission had the last knot of anxiousness loosening and warmth spreading in Yifan’s chest and even though he didn’t notice the smile softening the stern lines of his face, Yixing certainly did.
“Come here.”
The Chinese man followed his low-pitched order without hesitation, stepping up to the counter and eyes never leaving Yifan’s face. Meanwhile Yifan was already leaning forward, while the other was still moving and by the time he came to a stop, with nothing but the wooden counter between them, he was close enough to press a soft kiss to his lips.
He wasn’t sure who was more surprised, Yixing or himself, but just a second later the smaller breathed out on a happy hum, his hand returning to its already familiar place at the back of his head, and it became clear that both of them were more than just fine with Yifan’s uncharacteristically bold behavior.
But of course it was too good to last.
Disaster struck, just seconds later, in the form of Oh Sehun and nothing but Oh Sehun.
“So let me get this straight. I can’t even bring one of Minseok’s to-go cups in here, but it’s perfectly alright for you kiss and make googly eyes at one of his employees?”
He would have definitely bolted around the counter and clamped a hand over the kid’s way too big and dangerous mouth, if it weren’t for…
“Explain.”
… that.
The single word was enough to turn Yifan’s insides to ice, rigid body failing to cooperate as he slowly turned around to find Jongdae standing in the doorway to the backrooms, cutting gaze zeroed in on Yixing and him with their faces just inches apart from each other.
He was going to kill Sehun. But only if he managed to survive the next ten minutes.