(Untitled)

[fanomy]

Ok I still havn't found a beta yet so be brutal

Title: child of the stars
rating: NC-17 eventually.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything from neither Stardust nor Chuck.
pairing: Chuck/Casey
summery: they're all at Chuck & Ellie's watching old family videos
when the spies in the room notice something...

Comments

[hourglass244]

Well, I will say I'm intrigued, certainly. You have a few punctuation and grammar errors, but what needs to be fixed first is the layout. It's kind of confusing and a little out of character

[fanomy]

Thank you. that is very appreciated. & while I already have some ideas for your Questions, I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter(SP?).

P.s.
You can just tell English is not my first language
Word is a grate(sp?) help let me tell you.

[hourglass244]

Not a problem. I've actually never beta'ed before or I'd offer. Still, though, if you have any specific questions regarding spelling, punctuation, grammar, or even if you just need someone to bounce ideas off of, you're welcome to send me an email. My address is the same as my user ID, just add @gmail.com to the end of it.

Also, you did spell 'matter' correctly in that comment. 'Grate,' however, should be spelled 'great' in this situation. Good luck!

[trixxanna]

I'm unable to help with the Beta-ing of this i must thank you for sharing it in even this rough stage.

I've had a splitting migraine and tooth ache all day and reading this cracked out piece of fic had me snorting and rolling with laughter.

[fanomy]

Thank you. While Crack was not my intention I did have some punch lines and it is gratifying to know they were appreciated.

P.s.
You can just tell English is not my first language
Word is a grate(sp?) help let me tell you.

[bookaddict43]

Honey first of all you need a better layout/colouring. Your text is too difficult too read and folks will lose interest.

I agree with hourglass244, you've got an interesting idea here. But it needs to be fleshed out more and I think there needs to be a reason that Chuck and Ellie are showing the video.

Here's a few questions for you -

Did Morgan never notice these things? He's been Chuck's friend for ages.

If Chuck had any powers why hasn't he used them? Even if it was just to help with Intersect stuff.

If you rework the piece and need a beta just PM me and I'll give you my email address.

[xenaclone]

Could do with running through a spellchecker, to be on the safe side.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's spelled 'Wienerlicious'.

A bit more fleshing out, please, if you're rewriting. Also it's not always easy to tell who is meant to be speaking. you don't have to start every line...

Chuck said, "
Casey replied, "
Sarah interrupted, "

But something in what they say [or how they say it] will let the reader figure it out.