Smallville - Chloe Sullivan/Clark Kent - 034. Not Enough
Title: Bittersweet
Fandom: Smallville
Characters: Chloe Sullivan/Clark Kent
Prompt: 034. Not Enough
Word Count: 889
Rating: PG
Summary: Society pushes people in pairs. Some of us only come in singles.
Author's Notes: Oh, I'm not gonna lie to you. You're gonna find some of my issues in here. LOL But I swear, the Chloe muse was apparently having a really rotten day, and she got a good rant on. She's entitled, trust me on this one. It doesn't help either of us that the Day of Doom looms on Tuesday. If you have any particular affection for that particular Hallmark holiday, you probably won't agree with half the things in this piece. Otherwise, hope you enjoy and it's taken in the spirit it was intended. ;)
***
Chloe wasn't the bitter sort, most of the time. But even she had days, like everyone, where she wondered if the universe was ever going to throw her a frickin' bone.
Everything was going her way for the mostpart. She was attending the college of her dreams in the city of her dreams, while working at the newspaper of her dreams.
It was the man of her dreams that was giving her fits.
He had been for years, so she assumed it was the week before Valentine's Day and the onslaught of coupledom that was messing with her head.
She swore if she saw one more red or pink heart, one more cheesy, oversized, date-stamped teddy bear, one more eHarmony.com commercial, or one more 'love special' from that damn Dr. Phil, she was going to hurt somebody.
Even baked goods had started to piss her off the day Pillsbury started running their stupid pre-packaged biscuit ads that declared "Because people come in pairs".
Like hell they do, she thought while glaring at the perky doughboy giggling on her screen. She would have liked to take a rolling pin to him just to see how giddy he would be then.
Chloe had a healthy cynical streak, but sometimes even she couldn't believe how far society would stoop to make a buck while making a large percentage of the population feel like freaks. It was the twenty-first century, but it was still about as socially acceptable to be single as it was to be a leper. It couldn't have been much worse if she had been the poor, lower class heroine of an Austen novel.
Even they seemed to fare better than she.
It wasn't enough that they expected you to march up the ramp to the Ark, two by two; that all the shows, movies, books, and love songs touted happily-ever-afters.
What no over-paid, over-hyped TV psychotherapist ever got around to telling you was what the hell to do when you fell in love with a boy in the eighth grade and still hadn't gotten over him by the freshman year of college.
Where was Unrequited Love for Dummies?
As sad as it sounded in her head, she was grateful to have Clark in her life any way she could get him. They had grown even closer in the nine months since their impromptu trip to the Artic, and they had an easy friendship that she had never had with anyone of either sex. Still, there were times when she thought everything was fine one moment, and the next he would look at her a certain way, or his voice would drop to a certain tone meant only for her. Then her stomach would clench, and she would have to fight back everything inside her that said she still loved him; that she was still in love with him.
He didn't know what he did to her, and she did her best to guard her heart. She didn't know if that was the best or the healthiest thing to do, because there was no guide. All she could do was go on with her life and see if Clark ever caught up with her. If he didn't right away, it wasn't like there was competition beating down her door.
Maybe no competition was Clark's problem. Sometimes you didn't see what you wanted until someone was trying to take it from you. The only problem was, every other male that Chloe encountered seemed to be as indifferent as Clark, and that's what truly preyed on her few insecurities.
She didn't want to be wanted by anyone but Clark, but it might have been nice to be noticed every once in awhile. She knew she was attractive, smart, kind, so what was the problem? Sometimes she had to glance down and make sure she wasn't wearing a heart tattooed with the word 'Clark' on her sleeve. As far as she could see, that would be the only sign that something was wrong.
Enough time had passed for her to know that things might never change. As long as Clark was in her life, and he was the gentle, amazing, kind-hearted, strong, heroic person he was, she was going to love him. It was so deeply rooted in her being that she didn't know if she would be able to remove it even if she had wanted. Love wasn't something easily banished, and even as she tried to move on he was right there beside her. That only made an impossible situation worse sometimes.
She made a conscious decision to keep loving him with all of her heart, and to show him through her friendship, her words, her actions that she would always be there. She would always do anything for him. He knew he would do the same for her, because he always had.
Maybe it didn't solve her hatred of the corporate whoring out of love. Maybe it didn't make her relationship with Clark any different. But maybe she could let go of the bitterness toward the rest of the world whose affairs of the heart weren't as complicated as hers.
Maybe it wasn't enough, but it was enough for now. It would have to be to turn the bitter into bittersweet.
Finis
Fandom: Smallville
Characters: Chloe Sullivan/Clark Kent
Prompt: 034. Not Enough
Word Count: 889
Rating: PG
Summary: Society pushes people in pairs. Some of us only come in singles.
Author's Notes: Oh, I'm not gonna lie to you. You're gonna find some of my issues in here. LOL But I swear, the Chloe muse was apparently having a really rotten day, and she got a good rant on. She's entitled, trust me on this one. It doesn't help either of us that the Day of Doom looms on Tuesday. If you have any particular affection for that particular Hallmark holiday, you probably won't agree with half the things in this piece. Otherwise, hope you enjoy and it's taken in the spirit it was intended. ;)
***
Chloe wasn't the bitter sort, most of the time. But even she had days, like everyone, where she wondered if the universe was ever going to throw her a frickin' bone.
Everything was going her way for the mostpart. She was attending the college of her dreams in the city of her dreams, while working at the newspaper of her dreams.
It was the man of her dreams that was giving her fits.
He had been for years, so she assumed it was the week before Valentine's Day and the onslaught of coupledom that was messing with her head.
She swore if she saw one more red or pink heart, one more cheesy, oversized, date-stamped teddy bear, one more eHarmony.com commercial, or one more 'love special' from that damn Dr. Phil, she was going to hurt somebody.
Even baked goods had started to piss her off the day Pillsbury started running their stupid pre-packaged biscuit ads that declared "Because people come in pairs".
Like hell they do, she thought while glaring at the perky doughboy giggling on her screen. She would have liked to take a rolling pin to him just to see how giddy he would be then.
Chloe had a healthy cynical streak, but sometimes even she couldn't believe how far society would stoop to make a buck while making a large percentage of the population feel like freaks. It was the twenty-first century, but it was still about as socially acceptable to be single as it was to be a leper. It couldn't have been much worse if she had been the poor, lower class heroine of an Austen novel.
Even they seemed to fare better than she.
It wasn't enough that they expected you to march up the ramp to the Ark, two by two; that all the shows, movies, books, and love songs touted happily-ever-afters.
What no over-paid, over-hyped TV psychotherapist ever got around to telling you was what the hell to do when you fell in love with a boy in the eighth grade and still hadn't gotten over him by the freshman year of college.
Where was Unrequited Love for Dummies?
As sad as it sounded in her head, she was grateful to have Clark in her life any way she could get him. They had grown even closer in the nine months since their impromptu trip to the Artic, and they had an easy friendship that she had never had with anyone of either sex. Still, there were times when she thought everything was fine one moment, and the next he would look at her a certain way, or his voice would drop to a certain tone meant only for her. Then her stomach would clench, and she would have to fight back everything inside her that said she still loved him; that she was still in love with him.
He didn't know what he did to her, and she did her best to guard her heart. She didn't know if that was the best or the healthiest thing to do, because there was no guide. All she could do was go on with her life and see if Clark ever caught up with her. If he didn't right away, it wasn't like there was competition beating down her door.
Maybe no competition was Clark's problem. Sometimes you didn't see what you wanted until someone was trying to take it from you. The only problem was, every other male that Chloe encountered seemed to be as indifferent as Clark, and that's what truly preyed on her few insecurities.
She didn't want to be wanted by anyone but Clark, but it might have been nice to be noticed every once in awhile. She knew she was attractive, smart, kind, so what was the problem? Sometimes she had to glance down and make sure she wasn't wearing a heart tattooed with the word 'Clark' on her sleeve. As far as she could see, that would be the only sign that something was wrong.
Enough time had passed for her to know that things might never change. As long as Clark was in her life, and he was the gentle, amazing, kind-hearted, strong, heroic person he was, she was going to love him. It was so deeply rooted in her being that she didn't know if she would be able to remove it even if she had wanted. Love wasn't something easily banished, and even as she tried to move on he was right there beside her. That only made an impossible situation worse sometimes.
She made a conscious decision to keep loving him with all of her heart, and to show him through her friendship, her words, her actions that she would always be there. She would always do anything for him. He knew he would do the same for her, because he always had.
Maybe it didn't solve her hatred of the corporate whoring out of love. Maybe it didn't make her relationship with Clark any different. But maybe she could let go of the bitterness toward the rest of the world whose affairs of the heart weren't as complicated as hers.
Maybe it wasn't enough, but it was enough for now. It would have to be to turn the bitter into bittersweet.
Finis