Talent Show, Fandom High Auditorium, Friday Afternoon, 07.07.06

[bluth_illusions]

The all too familiar opening chords of Europe's The Final Countdown sounded and after a short delay for dramatic effect, GOB danced out onto the auditorium stage. He pulled blue and gold handkerchief chains out of both sleeves (which was difficult with a hand still in a cast) until the chains clearly met in the middle underneath his shirt. A large

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Charlie Kawalsky

[bluth_illusions]

"Everyone, please welcome Charlie Kawalsky. He doesn't realize that the Yankees suck."

Re: Charlie Kawalsky

[kawalsky]

Kawalsky walked out on stage wearing a Yankees uniform. His arm was still in a cast (as seemed to be the fashion these days), but waved to the crowd and then nodded to the zombie band to start up. "Folks, I'd like to thank you all for coming, and for ignoring Coach Bluth's Yankee-bashing. The man can do a decent magic act, but wouldn't know a good baseball team if they sat on him. You all know the words to this ol' classic, so feel free to join in!"

He started juggling three baseballs and began to sing.

"Take me out to the ball game,
Take me out with the crowd;
Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack,
I don't care if I never get back.
Let me root, root, root for the home team,
If they don't win, it's a shame.
For it's one, two, three strikes, you're out,
At the old ball game.

One more time, folks!

Take me out to the ball game

Audience: Charlie Kawalsky

[bluth_illusions]

React to Charlie's performance.

Re: Audience: Charlie Kawalsky

[whitedeathpod]

"Where's the dancing?!" John shouts from his spot in the audience. "That song needs dancing or...sing it like Harry Carey!"

Re: Audience: Charlie Kawalsky

[cantgetnorelief]

"Red Sox! Red Sox all the way, dude!" Anders yelled, Angels cap notwithstanding.

But he had been singing along.

Re: Audience: Charlie Kawalsky

[peter__parker]

"Let's score some runs!" Peter yelled.

Nadia Santos

[bluth_illusions]

"Nadia Santos is here to perform Caroline Spine's Sullivan. I'm sure it'll be lovely and not at all offensive. Unless she really wants yet another detention."

Re: Nadia Santos

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia came onto the stage with no fanfare whatsoever and stepped up to the mike, striking a chord on the guitar, then went right into the song.

It's not hard to reach back to the day

Audience: Nadia Santos

[bluth_illusions]

React to Nadia's song.

Re: Audience: Nadia Santos

[whitedeathpod]

"Dude!" John shouts towards the stage. "You made me sad."

Re: Audience: Nadia Santos

[cantgetnorelief]

Anders was a little bit confused by the song, but he applauded anyway, because it was Nadia.

No, he wasn't sniffling.

Re: Audience: Nadia Santos

[peter__parker]

Peter just clapped. That kind of performance deserved quiet respect.

Peter Griffin

[bluth_illusions]

"And now a rap performed by Peter Griffin. God help us all."

Re: Peter Griffin

[bigfat_peter]

Peter came on stage wearing his usual white shirt and green pants. He looks seemingly innocent. Then the music to MC Hammer's "Can't Touch Me" comes on.

Ju-Ju-Ju-Ju Just like the bad guy
from Lethal Weapon 2
I got diplomatic immunity
So Hammer you can't sue.

I can write graffiti
even jaywalk in the street
I could riot, loot, not give a hoot
and touch your sister's teat

Can't touch me

Stop! Peter-time
I'm a big shot there's no doubt
Light a fire and pee it out.
Don't like it? Kiss my rump
Just for a minute let's all do the Bump

Can't touch me
yea do the Peter Griffin Bump
Can't touch me.

I'm presidential Peter
Interns think I'm hot
Don't care if you're handicapped
I'll still park in you spot.
I've been around the world
from Hartford to Backbay

It's Peter, go, Peter, MC Peter, yo, Peter
Let's see Regis rap this way.
Can't touch me.

He then points to the ladies in the audience. "Except the ladies. You can touch me."

((Here's the song if you want it))