Life is a cumulative experience. Every thing that happens to us adds depth to our experience and coulor to our charecter. Some days the shades of blue are deeper than others
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Yeah... it is just one of those days... he has been on my mind a lot, and then the sujbect of the accident came up last night... re-lived some of the good times in my dream state... realized that I no longer had the newspaper stuff saved and wondered if I could find it online... decided I needed to save the links and text in a way that I could find it more easily on days like this....
It is interesting, it is not easy, I don't think it will ever be easy, but I am at the point where my memories and feelings about the good things far outweigh the shock and pain of that last day. I think it is that I am finally out of shock...
It amazes me how my stages of grieving and recaction to the deaths of those I love have changed over the years. It still hurts to know they're gone, but the way it hurts (both physically and emotionally) evolves. I can't say it's any easier over time, but it is definitely different. I'm glad you still take time to honor Tony by having days like this. He deserves to continue to be remembered as time seperates you from the actual event.
*big hug* This post was in no way meant to make you feel bad hon! I had been thinking about Tony a lot for about a week before last night... This was just something I have needed to do for me.
I am actually in a much better place with this loss than I have been previously... being able to remember his life and his death at the same time without becoming dysfunctional is an interesting new change.
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*hugs*
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It is interesting, it is not easy, I don't think it will ever be easy, but I am at the point where my memories and feelings about the good things far outweigh the shock and pain of that last day. I think it is that I am finally out of shock...
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This post was in no way meant to make you feel bad hon! I had been thinking about Tony a lot for about a week before last night... This was just something I have needed to do for me.
I am actually in a much better place with this loss than I have been previously... being able to remember his life and his death at the same time without becoming dysfunctional is an interesting new change.
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*more hugs*
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