my life is so dramatic it is full of paris and whores it is like miller wrote it i am a genius

[exmortalfucktoy]

You
by Claude.

You.
What
are
you?
Are you a toe?
Are you a shoe?
SeLf pOrTrAiT aS a HeEL
i am snake-like in the jungles of confusion
S(flash)T(flash)R(flash)O(flash)B(flash)E(flash) LIGHTS
These thoughts, they push through my mind
SWIRLING LIKE MUSIC
ripples, ripples on the ocean of heavenly damned sin I AWAKE

Comments

[xxcelebornxx]

Um...she's scares me, so I'm doing this out of a weird form of protective custody.

Um...fuck, repetitive but... *handcuffs to left arm and runs*

Re: Whoa!

[glorfind3l]

Yesterday. Why? Like it?

Re: Whoa!

[xxcelebornxx]

Ahahaha, that's a fucking understatement.

((ahaha and I christened it, The Icon With Which I Will Fuck With Gina's Head ;D))

[glorfind3l]

Ahaha, it serves its purpose, then.

((ahahaha as if the Hunky Dory ones weren't doing it already))

[xxcelebornxx]

Unbelievably so.

Re:

[xxcelebornxx]

Don't be MAD Ionlyhandcuffedhimtomebecauseshe'sscaryandIdon'twanthertogetobsessivelypsycholikethatweirdchickinTheCrushandkillhimso....*breaths*

..it's like um a protective custody thing.

I have the handcuff keys. We can be uncuffed.

I'm sorry :(

[glorfind3l]

Protective custody thing? He's your fuckbuddy, not your twelve-year-old. He can take care of himself.

*crosses arms* So. Where are the keys?

Stop using the mad face, I'm getting nervous.

[xxcelebornxx]

Can you not refer to him as my fuckbuddy?! WE haven't done anything for awhile...so, he's not anymore.

What? You don't believe me? Left backpocket!!! I just couldn't get it out because he's cuffed to my left arm.

Fine, would you prefer the nuclear fallout symbol? The skull and crossbones?

[glorfind3l]

Minor technicality.

Well, get it out, then. *twaps Claude's hand away* I'll get it. Christ. ......

Cel, there's nothing in here.

....No, actually, I HATE all of them!!!

[xxcelebornxx]

Yeah, yeah, I see how it is commit a few adulterous acts while in a previous marriage and you're always a whore!!! Right?!

See?! That's why I didn't bother!

...... what?! But, the keys!!! I put them in there!!!! THE KEYS SHOULD BE IN THERE!!! Are you sure?! Maybe my pants are too tight or something!!! ARE YOU SURE THEY'RE NOT IN THERE?! I put the fucking KEY there!!!!! Oxygen. Need. Oxygen.

Two frown faces deserve at least one angry emoticon.

[glorfind3l]

*cough/laughs a little at the words "a few"* Would you calm down? It's not as if I can judge. Jesus.

You could have not cuffed yourself to him in the first place.

Celeborn, if you pants were that tight, I'd be able to see the outline of the key through the leather. You must have just misplaced them. Think. THINK HARD. VERY HARD. Where. did. you. put. them?

You hate me.

[xxcelebornxx]

>_< Fine. Maybe a bit more than a few but that doesn't matter now. I am trying to be calm, calmness happens to fade in these situations.

Ok, so I made another fucking mistake on top of all the rest I made in my life. I jumped without thinking as usual! Christ, I said I was sorry.

I swear, Glorfie, I remembered putting them in my pocket. Claude's, um, hand has been there quite often maybe he took it. Or, it could've fell out when I tripped awhile back. I can't fucking think very hard if I think you're mad at me. Oh, look, number three: :(

I love you. Loving you doesn't preclude wanting to fucking throttle you when you pull this shit.

[glorfind3l]

Don't be so touchy. *slaps Claude's hands away again* You especially.

Ok, ok, I'm not mad. See? This is me, not angry. Now Celeborn, honey, sweetheart, light of my fucking life, WHERE IS THE GOD DAMNED KEY?! Gah. If you weren't so hung up on mithril cuffs, I'd just take a hacksaw to the fucking chain. >_< Really, Cel, consider the possibility of being handcuffed to Claude day and night until we find a locksmith. All day, all night, all the fucking time. While you do that, I'm going to go make up the sofabed for the two of you.

[xxcelebornxx]

You can always cut his hand off.

I TOLD YOU THE FUCKING KEY WAS IN MY POCKET!!! If it's not there I don't know where it is!!! Did you check Claude?

There are no possibilities of me doing anything with Claude. I cuffed him to my arm, I was going to bring him to a safe stalk free place and then be uncuffed. That. Was. All. I didn't know I'd lose the key!!! I wouldn't let him touch me!!!! WHAT POSSIBILITIES ARE THERE?!

Oh...the sofabed...for me and Claude. Great. Don't bother, Glorfie, I'll find Pierre and use one of his bobbypins to pick the lock.

[glorfind3l]

.... there's an idea.... hmmmm... Well, so much for your enduring concern for his welfare.

I'm not touching him. >_< You check Claude.

What you'd let him do and what he'd do anyway are two separate things. Do you really want me to list the possibilities?

Yes, the sofabed. Would you rather let him kill me in my sleep? Fucking bobbypins won't work on those. Come here, I have a Swiss Army knife.

Re:

[xxcelebornxx]

Well, look where my fucking concern got me now!

I have one free hand, Glorf, and you didn't even like the idea of me being cuffed to him but you want me to fucking search him.

I outweigh him by at least thirty pounds, I'm also sober, nothing can happen.

No, I don't want him to kill you in your sleep, I didn't think of that. No offense, but I don't want to go near you while you have a knife. NOT because of trust issues, well...ok, because of trust issues that I have with EVERYONE! So...don't be insulted.