For sg_fignewton, Proportional Hazards (gen, G)
sg_fignewton requested anything connected with Folsom Prison Blues. Gen, humor, ~350 words, no spoilers: (1/24/07--minor edit)
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"Three months. That's gotta be a record."
Jack picked himself up off the floor as a solid white barrier shoomped down across the tiny room's only doorway. He ignored the twinge in his knee and offered a hand up to Daniel, who was staring dejectedly up at the ceiling, silently mouthing a word that could have been "ow".
"It has been some time since our last incarceration." Teal'c eyed the white walls, unconcerned.
"One hundred and seventeen days exactly." Carter almost seemed smug about it, giving the door frame a series of small taps with her knuckles as she spoke. "Definitely a record."
"Ow," Daniel said, sitting up. Then, "Whoa, nine."
"Indeed."
Jack turned to the Jaffa, incredulous. "This one rates a nine?"
Teal'c merely raised an eyebrow in Carter's direction. She was still resolutely tapping her way along the frame, and had produced a screwdriver from somewhere. Suddenly she must've found what she was looking for; she stood back and pointed to a spot that looked no different from the rest of the wall surrounding it.
"Here, Teal'c," she said.
Teal'c took two strides across the room, letting his momentum carry him into a solid, open-palmed strike at Carter's non-spot.
A panel sprung open. Five seconds of screwdriver-ing later, the door shoomped up again, and they were ghosting down the hall.
"Does that even count?" Jack whispered as they found cover in an alcove.
"It better. . . " Carter stopped mid-sentence, suddenly concerned with the tops of her shoes. Jack gave her a look, then stood back.
"You didn't."
Carter had never looked so guilty in her life.
"You . . . they let you in?" Jack answered her silence.
"Siler owed me," she said. "I used him as a proxy. I didn't do anything to influence it, sir. I just used a Cox proportional hazards model with time-varying coefficients to predict a point of failure--"
"Sam," Daniel interrupted. "You joined the pool?"
She let out a sigh. "Yes."
Jack nodded toward the hall, and they were off again. "So," he said over his shoulder as they reached the compound doors. "How much?"
She gave a wicked grin. "Steaks are on me when we get back."
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"Three months. That's gotta be a record."
Jack picked himself up off the floor as a solid white barrier shoomped down across the tiny room's only doorway. He ignored the twinge in his knee and offered a hand up to Daniel, who was staring dejectedly up at the ceiling, silently mouthing a word that could have been "ow".
"It has been some time since our last incarceration." Teal'c eyed the white walls, unconcerned.
"One hundred and seventeen days exactly." Carter almost seemed smug about it, giving the door frame a series of small taps with her knuckles as she spoke. "Definitely a record."
"Ow," Daniel said, sitting up. Then, "Whoa, nine."
"Indeed."
Jack turned to the Jaffa, incredulous. "This one rates a nine?"
Teal'c merely raised an eyebrow in Carter's direction. She was still resolutely tapping her way along the frame, and had produced a screwdriver from somewhere. Suddenly she must've found what she was looking for; she stood back and pointed to a spot that looked no different from the rest of the wall surrounding it.
"Here, Teal'c," she said.
Teal'c took two strides across the room, letting his momentum carry him into a solid, open-palmed strike at Carter's non-spot.
A panel sprung open. Five seconds of screwdriver-ing later, the door shoomped up again, and they were ghosting down the hall.
"Does that even count?" Jack whispered as they found cover in an alcove.
"It better. . . " Carter stopped mid-sentence, suddenly concerned with the tops of her shoes. Jack gave her a look, then stood back.
"You didn't."
Carter had never looked so guilty in her life.
"You . . . they let you in?" Jack answered her silence.
"Siler owed me," she said. "I used him as a proxy. I didn't do anything to influence it, sir. I just used a Cox proportional hazards model with time-varying coefficients to predict a point of failure--"
"Sam," Daniel interrupted. "You joined the pool?"
She let out a sigh. "Yes."
Jack nodded toward the hall, and they were off again. "So," he said over his shoulder as they reached the compound doors. "How much?"
She gave a wicked grin. "Steaks are on me when we get back."
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