Letting go verse: Don't Go Too Far
This is the third story in my Letting Go verse. Can easily be read as a stand alone. In which Jensen is a stressed out ER doctor, Jared is his husband and they figure out that a light D/s relationship during sex helps Jensen deals with his stress. This verse is them exploring this.
(this way to the first story)
Written for the smpc community
Title: Don't Go Too Far
Author:etoile_etiolee
Pairing:J2
Summary:Jensen experiments subspace for the first time
Warnings:NC-17 for porn, language, D/s (light), spanking, orgasm denial, aftercare.
Word Count: 2 K
Disclaimer:None of this is true
Beta: The amazing firesign10!
When Jared comes into the bedroom, he’s greeted by the most sinful, most gorgeous sight possible.
Jensen is kneeling in front of the bed, his upper body resting on the mattress, his head resting on his folded arms, naked, legs parted, his glistening hole exposed for Jared to see. As Jared gets closer, his husband’s body starts trembling, his furled pink hole constricting quickly.
“Good boy,” Jared murmurs. He’s learning, through their sessions, how sensitive Jensen is to endearments and praises. This time isn’t any different. Jensen lets out a soft, almost inaudible moan.
Jared kneels in front of Jensen's ass, fully exposed and offered to him. He places one hand on each ass cheek and presses them, hard; then he bends down and kisses the pink hole, dragging another low moan from Jensen’s throat.
“Safeword?” Jared asks softly.
“Dandelions,” Jensen answers in a raw voice.
“You got all ready for me, just like I asked -fuck, Jensen, can’t even imagine how hot you look right now.”
Jensen doesn’t answer. His hands tighten their grip on the comforter, though.
Jared pulls back to have another look, but he can’t stay away for long. He needs to kiss the small of Jensen’s back, where the skin is so creamy and white, sprinkled with a dusting of freckles. So he does, peppering small kisses, inhaling the smell that’s uniquely Jensen, but it’s not enough, so he starts biting, small nips of his teeth first, then sucking, then biting again, and Jensen moans louder, arching his back, his body asking for more.
Jared complies. He slides one hand under Jensen’s belly and fondles his balls, rolls them in his hands, feels the soft skin covering them getting tensed and puckered. Then he drags a finger, a single one, under the burning skin of his lover’s shaft, making him shiver all over.
“What are we going to do, baby?” he asks, lowering his mouth to blow all over Jensen’s hole. “Want it bad, huh? Want me to fuck you, Jensen?”
Jensen moans but doesn’t answer, so Jared slaps his left butt cheek, -not hard, just enough to shock him. They’ve started to play with pain recently, nothing hardcore, and Jared knows he has to be careful because sometimes when they play their games, Jensen gets lost in his own head. If it’s too much and he doesn’t think about saying his safeword, it would go against the reason they play in the first place. Jared can’t allow it. He’s responsible for Jensen during their sessions and he takes it seriously.
Jensen groans in response to the hit, his buttocks clenching. “I want an answer, Jen,” Jared explains, rubbing the reddened skin.
“Y-yeah… I want… fuck me, please, fuck me, Jared.”
Jared doesn’t waste time, slicking up his cock and shoving deep in Jensen’s warm, fluttering hole; his hands grip Jensen’s hips, hard. He bends over him and kisses his ear. “You won’t come until I tell you to, is that clear?”
“Yeah,” Jensen whispers, his hands gripping the sheets tighter. “Yes, Jared.”
“That’s good, that’s real good, Jen,” Jared praises, kissing his neck lazily, sucking a light bruise there.
All of Jensen’s body is tensed in anticipation. Jared keeps sucking at his neck for a minute or two. Without any warning, he withdraws his cock until only the tip is keeping Jensen’s ass open, then shoves back inside as hard as he can, hearing the breath get punched out of his husband’s chest as he does so. Jared doesn’t wait before doing it again, and again, and again, setting a quick and brutal pace that has Jensen moaning in pleasure. A few minutes later and Jared is ready to come, buried deep inside Jensen’s clenching hole. By the desperate whimpers Jensen lets out in short, uneven breaths, he must be close too.
Jared withdraws abruptly. Jensen tenses and lets out what sound like a cry. Smiling softly, Jared rubs his back in a soothing motion. “Not yet, baby, you can still wait, can't you?”
Jensen turns his head toward him. His face is beet red, covered in sweat. Jared feels a surge of desire, hardening his cock even more. He slaps Jensen’s buttocks twice, using more strength than before. “Did I say you could move?”
Jensen’s pupils are blown. He bites his lips and shakes his head, hard, before resuming his previous position. “Good boy,” Jared praises, “you’re so good for me, Jen. I’m gonna come all over your ass, and then it will be your turn, how is that?”
“Yes, please,” Jensen mumbles, face shoved in the comforter.
“Okay, love,” Jared stands up, fascinated by Jensen’s white skin, the contrast of the dark red patches on his ass from the spanking. “You’re so beautiful like this,” he pants, stroking his dick hard and fast. “So willing to give…ah… yourself to me… baby, love you so much…” On that, Jared comes hard, enough to start wobbling on his feet as his release paints Jensen’s ass in white streams. And all the while, Jensen stays still, shaking all over, holding the comforter so hard his knuckles are white.
Jared comes back slowly, stroking his cock lazily until it gets too sensitive. He goes back to his knees and starts licking his come off Jensen’s rear. “Please,” Jensen cries, “please, please, please, Jared, please, I can’t…”
“Of course you can,” Jared whispers, licking a long strip over Jensen’s sloppy hole. “You’re doing good, it’s almost over now.”
He waits until Jensen’s clean from his release before patting him softly on the ass. “There. On the bed, on your back.”
Jensen complies so eagerly he almost trips while crawling onto the bed. He moans as he turns on his back. His face and chest are flushed, his dick an angry pink, the tip sticky and shiny with precome.
“Now,” Jared coaxes, sitting next to him and rubbing his thigh in soft, soothing motions. “You’re gonna get yourself off-“
Immediately, Jensen bends his legs and wraps his hand around his cock. Jared smiles and holds his wrist back. “I'm not done yet. You’re gonna do exactly as I say. When I tell you to stop, you stop; when I tell you to go faster, you go faster. Am I clear?”
Jensen nods, pupils blown and lips swollen from biting them.
“Okay, start slowly, long, soft strokes.”
Jared plays with Jensen for a while, stopping him each time he gets too close, making him go slow, fast, hard, play with the head of his dick, fondle his balls. Past some point, Jensen isn’t even coherent anymore. He lets out small, pained noises, like a wounded animal, his whole body trembling, his eyes full of unshed tears. Jared marvels at how far Jensen is willing to go in his submissive role, and he bends down over him, pressing his lips on his forehead, then smiling. “You’re wonderful, baby. Come on, you can come now.”
All it takes is three strokes before Jensen’s whole body tenses, his hips arching off the bed. His eyes close shut and he wails, voice raw and used, then he start coming hard, thick spurts of semen landing high on his stomach, coating his hand. Jared runs a hand through his husband’s hair and talks him through the aftershocks, admiring the lustful picture Jensen makes right now.
“Perfect,” he murmurs when Jensen’s body finally relaxes, his chest still heaving with exertion.
A few moments later, Jared is cleaning Jensen thoroughly with a warm washcloth, caressing him all the while. Jensen doesn't even react to the first touch of the cloth. He’s still lying on his back, completely lax, his eyes only slits, his breathing slowing down with each second that passes. Jared is not used to him being so silent and still, even after one of their sessions. “Doin’ okay there, Jen?” he asks.
Jensen blinks and mumbles something Jared can’t quite understand. He tries again after getting rid of the washcloth and lying down next to him. “Jen, baby?”
Jensen turns his head very slowly toward him and opens his mouth, but nothing comes out.
Jared is about to panic when he remembers the articles he took on started reading since Jensen and he have been playing the game more regularly. There were a lot of comments and sections about a post-play condition called subdrop or subspace. Giving that Jared is actually taking care of Jensen, that his husband doesn’t seem upset or disturbed, and the fact that they’ve just barely finished tends to point toward the subspace possibility. Subspace is, Jared recalled, a mind state where the sub has totally given himself to his dom and isn’t really present anymore, relying instinctively on the trust he has put in his partner to care for him. It’s something you have to ease your sub out of, as gently as possible.
Jared can’t deny it’s a little scary, seeing Jensen like this, although according to subs' testimonies, this mind state is very soothing: some even compare it to an almost religious experience.
Without further hesitation, Jared gets the comforter over the both of them and wraps himself around Jensen, dragging his husband toward him so that his head is resting on his shoulder. Jensen lets out a long sigh, but still doesn’t acknowledge Jared. Rubbing small circles on his flat stomach, his other hand playing in Jensen’s hair, Jared starts murmuring in his ear, praises and comforting words. Apparently, repeating the sub's name helps to bring him back as well. Jared makes a point of doing it.
“Come on, baby, Jensen, hey… We’re done. You did so good, I can’t even tell you how proud of you I am, Jen. It’s time to come back, though. Can you do that, Jensen? Can you look at me, babe?”
It takes a few minutes before Jensen even seems to hear Jared’s low voice, and another five before his eyes open wider. His gaze is coming in and out of focus, but he tries to keep it on Jared, his head slightly tipped upward.
“Hey, there you are,” Jared smiles at him. “You alright, baby? Jensen?”
Jensen waits a few seconds before nodding slowly. One of his arm move upward to rest over Jared’s chest. He sighs again, yawns loudly, which makes Jared giggle. “You’re adorable,” he adds, pressing a kiss on Jensen’s forehead. “And so gorgeous.”
Jensen blinks again, frowns. “Shuddup,” he whispers, voice raw.
“It’s true,” Jared’s smiles grow wider when he hears his husband’s voice.
“'M so tired,” Jensen complains.
“It’s okay, you can sleep. I’ve got you.”
Jensen stretches languidly, like a cat. He looks drunk, or high -hell, both. All this, only for Jared to see. Only he gets to have Jensen like this. A surge of possessiveness runs through his veins, thinking of how vulnerable his husband is like this, how easy it would be for someone with less than good intentions to take advantage.
No one else gets to touch you, to have you so completely exposed, giving up your will without a second thought. You’re mine.
“I was…” Jensen frowns, like he’s trying hard to find the right words. “Was feeling so far, like… like… I don’t know. Like I was dreaming awake?”
“Yeah, well, don’t go too far, alright? Want you to stay with me,” Jared half jokes.
“Was that subspace?”
Jared is surprised to hear the exact term coming out of Jensen’s mouth. “I… you know about it?”
Jensen nods. His eyes are already closing. “Ya know, when you realize you get off on submitting to your husband during sex, it kinds of spawns a whole lot of questions that need answers,” he breathes out.
“And?”
“And I love you,” Jensen murmurs. “Now, sleep,” he pouts.
Jared guesses they’ll have to discuss this later, how Jensen feels about their sessions. He always has the tendency to doubt himself on every single thing he feels or do. What’s reassuring is that they wouldn’t have come that far if Jensen didn’t accept -at least a little bit- this side of himself.
It can wait.
“Alright. Love you too,” Jared says simply, pressing Jensen against himself. “You can rest now.”
Jared wouldn’t mind if his whole universe was to be reduced to Jensen and him in bed, safe and secure with each other under the covers.
He’d spend an eternity like this.
FIN
--- ---
(this way to the first story)
Written for the smpc community
Title: Don't Go Too Far
Author:etoile_etiolee
Pairing:J2
Summary:Jensen experiments subspace for the first time
Warnings:NC-17 for porn, language, D/s (light), spanking, orgasm denial, aftercare.
Word Count: 2 K
Disclaimer:None of this is true
Beta: The amazing firesign10!
When Jared comes into the bedroom, he’s greeted by the most sinful, most gorgeous sight possible.
Jensen is kneeling in front of the bed, his upper body resting on the mattress, his head resting on his folded arms, naked, legs parted, his glistening hole exposed for Jared to see. As Jared gets closer, his husband’s body starts trembling, his furled pink hole constricting quickly.
“Good boy,” Jared murmurs. He’s learning, through their sessions, how sensitive Jensen is to endearments and praises. This time isn’t any different. Jensen lets out a soft, almost inaudible moan.
Jared kneels in front of Jensen's ass, fully exposed and offered to him. He places one hand on each ass cheek and presses them, hard; then he bends down and kisses the pink hole, dragging another low moan from Jensen’s throat.
“Safeword?” Jared asks softly.
“Dandelions,” Jensen answers in a raw voice.
“You got all ready for me, just like I asked -fuck, Jensen, can’t even imagine how hot you look right now.”
Jensen doesn’t answer. His hands tighten their grip on the comforter, though.
Jared pulls back to have another look, but he can’t stay away for long. He needs to kiss the small of Jensen’s back, where the skin is so creamy and white, sprinkled with a dusting of freckles. So he does, peppering small kisses, inhaling the smell that’s uniquely Jensen, but it’s not enough, so he starts biting, small nips of his teeth first, then sucking, then biting again, and Jensen moans louder, arching his back, his body asking for more.
Jared complies. He slides one hand under Jensen’s belly and fondles his balls, rolls them in his hands, feels the soft skin covering them getting tensed and puckered. Then he drags a finger, a single one, under the burning skin of his lover’s shaft, making him shiver all over.
“What are we going to do, baby?” he asks, lowering his mouth to blow all over Jensen’s hole. “Want it bad, huh? Want me to fuck you, Jensen?”
Jensen moans but doesn’t answer, so Jared slaps his left butt cheek, -not hard, just enough to shock him. They’ve started to play with pain recently, nothing hardcore, and Jared knows he has to be careful because sometimes when they play their games, Jensen gets lost in his own head. If it’s too much and he doesn’t think about saying his safeword, it would go against the reason they play in the first place. Jared can’t allow it. He’s responsible for Jensen during their sessions and he takes it seriously.
Jensen groans in response to the hit, his buttocks clenching. “I want an answer, Jen,” Jared explains, rubbing the reddened skin.
“Y-yeah… I want… fuck me, please, fuck me, Jared.”
Jared doesn’t waste time, slicking up his cock and shoving deep in Jensen’s warm, fluttering hole; his hands grip Jensen’s hips, hard. He bends over him and kisses his ear. “You won’t come until I tell you to, is that clear?”
“Yeah,” Jensen whispers, his hands gripping the sheets tighter. “Yes, Jared.”
“That’s good, that’s real good, Jen,” Jared praises, kissing his neck lazily, sucking a light bruise there.
All of Jensen’s body is tensed in anticipation. Jared keeps sucking at his neck for a minute or two. Without any warning, he withdraws his cock until only the tip is keeping Jensen’s ass open, then shoves back inside as hard as he can, hearing the breath get punched out of his husband’s chest as he does so. Jared doesn’t wait before doing it again, and again, and again, setting a quick and brutal pace that has Jensen moaning in pleasure. A few minutes later and Jared is ready to come, buried deep inside Jensen’s clenching hole. By the desperate whimpers Jensen lets out in short, uneven breaths, he must be close too.
Jared withdraws abruptly. Jensen tenses and lets out what sound like a cry. Smiling softly, Jared rubs his back in a soothing motion. “Not yet, baby, you can still wait, can't you?”
Jensen turns his head toward him. His face is beet red, covered in sweat. Jared feels a surge of desire, hardening his cock even more. He slaps Jensen’s buttocks twice, using more strength than before. “Did I say you could move?”
Jensen’s pupils are blown. He bites his lips and shakes his head, hard, before resuming his previous position. “Good boy,” Jared praises, “you’re so good for me, Jen. I’m gonna come all over your ass, and then it will be your turn, how is that?”
“Yes, please,” Jensen mumbles, face shoved in the comforter.
“Okay, love,” Jared stands up, fascinated by Jensen’s white skin, the contrast of the dark red patches on his ass from the spanking. “You’re so beautiful like this,” he pants, stroking his dick hard and fast. “So willing to give…ah… yourself to me… baby, love you so much…” On that, Jared comes hard, enough to start wobbling on his feet as his release paints Jensen’s ass in white streams. And all the while, Jensen stays still, shaking all over, holding the comforter so hard his knuckles are white.
Jared comes back slowly, stroking his cock lazily until it gets too sensitive. He goes back to his knees and starts licking his come off Jensen’s rear. “Please,” Jensen cries, “please, please, please, Jared, please, I can’t…”
“Of course you can,” Jared whispers, licking a long strip over Jensen’s sloppy hole. “You’re doing good, it’s almost over now.”
He waits until Jensen’s clean from his release before patting him softly on the ass. “There. On the bed, on your back.”
Jensen complies so eagerly he almost trips while crawling onto the bed. He moans as he turns on his back. His face and chest are flushed, his dick an angry pink, the tip sticky and shiny with precome.
“Now,” Jared coaxes, sitting next to him and rubbing his thigh in soft, soothing motions. “You’re gonna get yourself off-“
Immediately, Jensen bends his legs and wraps his hand around his cock. Jared smiles and holds his wrist back. “I'm not done yet. You’re gonna do exactly as I say. When I tell you to stop, you stop; when I tell you to go faster, you go faster. Am I clear?”
Jensen nods, pupils blown and lips swollen from biting them.
“Okay, start slowly, long, soft strokes.”
Jared plays with Jensen for a while, stopping him each time he gets too close, making him go slow, fast, hard, play with the head of his dick, fondle his balls. Past some point, Jensen isn’t even coherent anymore. He lets out small, pained noises, like a wounded animal, his whole body trembling, his eyes full of unshed tears. Jared marvels at how far Jensen is willing to go in his submissive role, and he bends down over him, pressing his lips on his forehead, then smiling. “You’re wonderful, baby. Come on, you can come now.”
All it takes is three strokes before Jensen’s whole body tenses, his hips arching off the bed. His eyes close shut and he wails, voice raw and used, then he start coming hard, thick spurts of semen landing high on his stomach, coating his hand. Jared runs a hand through his husband’s hair and talks him through the aftershocks, admiring the lustful picture Jensen makes right now.
“Perfect,” he murmurs when Jensen’s body finally relaxes, his chest still heaving with exertion.
A few moments later, Jared is cleaning Jensen thoroughly with a warm washcloth, caressing him all the while. Jensen doesn't even react to the first touch of the cloth. He’s still lying on his back, completely lax, his eyes only slits, his breathing slowing down with each second that passes. Jared is not used to him being so silent and still, even after one of their sessions. “Doin’ okay there, Jen?” he asks.
Jensen blinks and mumbles something Jared can’t quite understand. He tries again after getting rid of the washcloth and lying down next to him. “Jen, baby?”
Jensen turns his head very slowly toward him and opens his mouth, but nothing comes out.
Jared is about to panic when he remembers the articles he took on started reading since Jensen and he have been playing the game more regularly. There were a lot of comments and sections about a post-play condition called subdrop or subspace. Giving that Jared is actually taking care of Jensen, that his husband doesn’t seem upset or disturbed, and the fact that they’ve just barely finished tends to point toward the subspace possibility. Subspace is, Jared recalled, a mind state where the sub has totally given himself to his dom and isn’t really present anymore, relying instinctively on the trust he has put in his partner to care for him. It’s something you have to ease your sub out of, as gently as possible.
Jared can’t deny it’s a little scary, seeing Jensen like this, although according to subs' testimonies, this mind state is very soothing: some even compare it to an almost religious experience.
Without further hesitation, Jared gets the comforter over the both of them and wraps himself around Jensen, dragging his husband toward him so that his head is resting on his shoulder. Jensen lets out a long sigh, but still doesn’t acknowledge Jared. Rubbing small circles on his flat stomach, his other hand playing in Jensen’s hair, Jared starts murmuring in his ear, praises and comforting words. Apparently, repeating the sub's name helps to bring him back as well. Jared makes a point of doing it.
“Come on, baby, Jensen, hey… We’re done. You did so good, I can’t even tell you how proud of you I am, Jen. It’s time to come back, though. Can you do that, Jensen? Can you look at me, babe?”
It takes a few minutes before Jensen even seems to hear Jared’s low voice, and another five before his eyes open wider. His gaze is coming in and out of focus, but he tries to keep it on Jared, his head slightly tipped upward.
“Hey, there you are,” Jared smiles at him. “You alright, baby? Jensen?”
Jensen waits a few seconds before nodding slowly. One of his arm move upward to rest over Jared’s chest. He sighs again, yawns loudly, which makes Jared giggle. “You’re adorable,” he adds, pressing a kiss on Jensen’s forehead. “And so gorgeous.”
Jensen blinks again, frowns. “Shuddup,” he whispers, voice raw.
“It’s true,” Jared’s smiles grow wider when he hears his husband’s voice.
“'M so tired,” Jensen complains.
“It’s okay, you can sleep. I’ve got you.”
Jensen stretches languidly, like a cat. He looks drunk, or high -hell, both. All this, only for Jared to see. Only he gets to have Jensen like this. A surge of possessiveness runs through his veins, thinking of how vulnerable his husband is like this, how easy it would be for someone with less than good intentions to take advantage.
No one else gets to touch you, to have you so completely exposed, giving up your will without a second thought. You’re mine.
“I was…” Jensen frowns, like he’s trying hard to find the right words. “Was feeling so far, like… like… I don’t know. Like I was dreaming awake?”
“Yeah, well, don’t go too far, alright? Want you to stay with me,” Jared half jokes.
“Was that subspace?”
Jared is surprised to hear the exact term coming out of Jensen’s mouth. “I… you know about it?”
Jensen nods. His eyes are already closing. “Ya know, when you realize you get off on submitting to your husband during sex, it kinds of spawns a whole lot of questions that need answers,” he breathes out.
“And?”
“And I love you,” Jensen murmurs. “Now, sleep,” he pouts.
Jared guesses they’ll have to discuss this later, how Jensen feels about their sessions. He always has the tendency to doubt himself on every single thing he feels or do. What’s reassuring is that they wouldn’t have come that far if Jensen didn’t accept -at least a little bit- this side of himself.
It can wait.
“Alright. Love you too,” Jared says simply, pressing Jensen against himself. “You can rest now.”
Jared wouldn’t mind if his whole universe was to be reduced to Jensen and him in bed, safe and secure with each other under the covers.
He’d spend an eternity like this.
FIN
--- ---