why it’s okay to say ‘no’ to stuff

[esteefee]

Posted in full at: http://ift.tt/1XuuzdzRead more... )

Comments

[loseendothermic]

Thats interesting

[esteefee]

thx.

[em_kellesvig]

Thanks for posting this. I wish someone had said this to me thirty years ago.

[esteefee]

I always learn something when I talk to you. :)

[wings128]

I'm getting better at it, but I still find it hard to say "no", and I wonder why I end up resenting obligations that I got myself into :/

[esteefee]

It's really hard, is the thing.

[wpadmirer]

It took me years to get this, and I still have problems with it at work. (sigh) But my boss has been encouraging me to set boundaries. She's actually really good at urging me to say no to others in the workplace. Which is nice.

Now if I could just say no to her. (grin)

[esteefee]

Progress! and hahah, well. There are some people you just can't, of course. Although I do negotiate with my boss as well when I can tell she's asking me out of conflict of interest with her role as Development of Engineering versus Head of Release Engineering. For some reason mgmt put her on double-duty, and she sometimes asks for things she shouldn't.

[grey853]

Not enough people, especially women, seem to get this. We're socialized to please and saying no is not pleasing. Still, I learned the hard way that if don't look out for yourself, nobody else will.

Thanks for posting this and reinforcing it.

[esteefee]

Good point: I neglected to mention how much harder saying no tends to be for women. But it's even more important for us!

Thanks, grey.