I wish I had some particularly helpful advice for you, having myself grown up as a hapa, but it is also very difficult to articulate the experience from this side of it, even as an adult
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I also always have this nagging question in my mind if I ever get compliments on my appearance of "Is that a real compliment, or am I being fetishized for being exotic, or otherwise being qualified or judged by some different standard as The Other?"This is something that I'm sure both girls will have to deal with as well. When they're dating, will the people who are interested in them be interested in THEM as people, or interested in them as the exotic
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FWIW, my nieces seem to be doing great. They are half-white/half-black, though both could easily "pass as black" (and often do if our family isn't around - some really "funny" stories there...) We live in a very "white" area, too, which brings even more attention to them.
My oldest niece is actually quite shy and conservative, despite the near-constant comments from strangers about her beauty as she's grown up. My second niece has heard it all, too, and while she's more outgoing, she's generally more interested in sports than make-up, yk?
Anyway, my point is that family does make a difference, in the long run. :)
I have nothing really substantive to add to this post, but it did make me think. My sister's father is Chinese. Interestingly, she does not look Chinese, but rather "Hispanic" (which may be more of a problem for her now, living in AZ). Anyway, my sister didn't grow up at all with her father, but with the rest of my all-white family. This is not a subject I have broached with her, but this is a subject I have wondered about with trans-racial adoption as well, namely, growing up having no connection to one's racial background, and the effect that has on a person.
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My oldest niece is actually quite shy and conservative, despite the near-constant comments from strangers about her beauty as she's grown up. My second niece has heard it all, too, and while she's more outgoing, she's generally more interested in sports than make-up, yk?
Anyway, my point is that family does make a difference, in the long run. :)
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