Title: Quickest Way to a Man's Heart
Fandom: DBSK
Pairing: none
Prompt: Eating Disorders
Rating: PG
Word Count: 674
Summary: Changmin would like to set the record straight. He was not and never had been obsessed with food, no matter what some people might think. A certain cook, however...
AN: Written, as the subject and tag say, for
hc_bingo. Masterpost with game card is
here.
Changmin was never quite sure where the idea among their fandom came from that he was obsessed with food. So maybe there was that interview where one of them had claimed he ate eight meals a day, as if management gave them time for more than two. Or the time someone had mentioned his tendency toward midnight snacks, without mentioning that the only times he bothered with those were times when they actually got home by midnight. Hard to get out of bed for food when you hadn’t even made it to bed in the first place.
How did the fangirls never notice that he was probably the sanest of all of them when it came to food? Obsession? Ha. More like self-preservation.
Yoochun practically never ate at all, and giving Junsu sugar was like feeding a gremlin after midnight. Yunho was paranoid about everything and anything, although admittedly with good reason, and Jaejoong...
Jaejoong was more obsessed with food than any of them.
Case in point, when they’d gotten rich and famous enough for it to not be completely insane, they’d gone to some special dinner or another where they were the guests of honor. They’d been served shark-fin soup. Jaejoong had sworn for weeks that he could make it better, and only begrudgingly dropped the idea after all four of them had spent countless hours convincing him that the fans would find out and did he want to be thought of as a shark killer for the rest of his natural life?
How would the fans feel now if they could see him? Their precious Min/food couple, destroyed. And all Jaejoong’s fault. He sighed, stomach grumbling, and went to search the cupboards. Ever since he watched the stolen copy of 3hree Voices that Yunho had smuggled in, nothing had sounded nearly as good as Jaejoong’s cooking. Yes, he’d missed it before, but watching him making food, just like he’d always made food, and then eating it alone was almost enough to turn Changmin off food forever.
How would the fans like that?
Oh, sure, they’d probably noticed both of them losing weight, but it was easy enough to refuse to answer those questions or admit to stress and being busy, but hell, what did he even do these days? He sat around and watched videos of people he wasn’t supposed to care about anymore while being unable to stomach anything they hadn’t cooked.
That wasn’t healthy. It couldn’t possibly be healthy.
Maybe he was a little obsessed with food, but only specific food, so that was okay. Obviously, considering the response to the nude scenes in his drama, he wasn’t any worse off for it. Not that he could be any worse off for it, now that the source of his obsession was unobtainable. Not that neither one of them could cook, although with the way Yunho kept bringing home take-out, they might both forget how sooner than later. It just never felt right.
It was all fucking Jaejoong’s fault. He got his stupid ideas and his stupid demands and his stupid requests, and why couldn’t he think of them once in a while? His stupid tweets didn’t count, either, since they only ever heard about them when the fansites exploded. Changmin hadn’t checked the fansites in weeks. They never talked about him anymore, anyway, so why should he? On the one hand, he knew it was his own fault for staying in the apartment or going to his parents’ home for such long periods, but he had never been the attention whore of the group.
That was Jaejoong. Jaejoong and his stupid food and his stupid video.
Changmin threw the remote against the wall. The batteries fell out. Yunho could pick them up later. Right now, he was going to make a cup of ramyun, and it was going to be the best cup of ramyun he’d ever had. Because he didn’t need anyone to cook for him. Not ever.
Someday, he’d even tell stupid Jaejoong that to his face.