The Hour of Need
The Hour of Need
Author: enigmaticblue
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I don’t own these characters; too bad, so sad.
Pairings/Characters: Cassandra Fraiser, Sam Carter, Daniel Jackson, Teal’c, Jack O’Neill
Spoilers: Through S7, “Heroes: Part II”
Word Count: ~1500
Summary: It was never supposed to happen to her mom.
A/N: Written for the
hc_bingo prompt “group support”
Sam and Daniel were the ones to give her the news.
She had been doing her homework, waiting for her mom to get home so they could eat dinner and Cassie could wheedle some time at the mall with a friend. She thought that if she offered to do a few more chores, she might convince her mom to front the money to buy that great dress she’d been coveting.
When the doorbell rang, she sighed. Cassie knew they weren’t expecting company, which meant it was probably one of the neighborhood kids selling cookies or candy bars. For a second, she debated not answering the door and just pretending no one was home, but the doorbell rang again.
She was confused for a minute when she saw Sam and Daniel standing on the porch, but then she saw how red Sam’s eyes were, and Daniel’s tense, unhappy expression, and Cassie knew.
“How bad?” she asked before they could say anything.
Sam hesitated. “Can we come inside?”
Cassie stepped aside to let them enter. “How bad is it?” she asked again.
Sam put an arm around her shoulders. “Let’s sit down.”
Cassie jerked away. “Just tell me.”
“It’s Janet,” Daniel said, his voice hoarse. “I’m sorry.”
Cassie shook her head, wanting to deny it, wanting them to take it back, because it was never supposed to happen to her mom. She knew that working at the SGC could be dangerous-Sam and Jack and Daniel and Teal’c had all been hurt in the past, and hurt badly. Daniel had even died for a while.
But her mom was a doctor; she wasn’t on the front lines. Her mom was supposed to come home every night, even if it was really late.
“Cassie,” Sam began, and then stopped.
Cassie could see that Sam was fighting tears, and that more than anything else convinced her that it was real. Sam didn’t cry unless it was really bad.
“How did it happen?” Cassie asked faintly.
This time, Daniel was the one to put an arm around her shoulders. “She went off-world to render assistance to a fallen airman,” Daniel explained, steering Cassie to the couch and getting her settled. “We were trying to get him stable enough to move, and your mom was hit by a staff blast. There was nothing we could do.”
Cassie digested his words slowly. “You were there?”
“I was,” Daniel admitted. “I’m sorry, Cassie. I’m sorry I couldn’t save her.”
The tears came now, and she allowed Daniel to hold her tight, feeling the couch dip on her other side as Sam joined them.
Cassie wasn’t the only one crying.
~~~~~
She got more of the details later. General Hammond visited the day after Cassie got the news, and he shook her hand and told her how sorry he was, and how her mom was very brave. He said that her sacrifice meant that another life was saved.
Cassie had nodded and swallowed her tears and didn’t say that she didn’t give a fuck about some airman’s life because she just wanted her mom back.
Her mom hated it when Cassie used that kind of language, and Cassie suspected that someday that information might actually make losing her mom easier. Maybe someday, but not today.
General Hammond invited her to the memorial service at the SGC, too, but by then, Cassie couldn’t stomach the idea of another service, where she would have to put on her black dress and listen to people talk about how amazing her mom was, and hear how sorry they were that she was dead.
Cassie knew all of those things, but she was afraid that maybe her mom hadn’t known that Cassie thought she was amazing and smart and brave. She couldn’t even remember what they’d said to each other that morning. She couldn’t remember if she’d said “I love you” on her way out the door, even though Cassie was pretty sure that her mom had said it.
Even though they had a memorial service at the SGC, most of them came to the funeral, too. Her mom was buried with full military honors, and Jack handed her the flag that had been draped over the coffin. Cassie wasn’t sure what story they were using to explain why an Air Force doctor had been killed, but at least they were willing to admit it had happened in the line of duty.
Cassie wasn’t sure why that was important, but it was.
Sam sat next to her during the funeral and held her hand. Cassie was glad that no one asked her to speak, because she didn’t think she’d have been able to choke out the words through her grief and anger.
General Hammond gave the graveside eulogy, and Cassie had to bite the inside of her cheek hard to keep herself from sobbing.
They went back to the house after the service. Cassie wasn’t sure where all the food had come from; she certainly hadn’t given any thought to how she was supposed to feed the visitors who had come for the reception afterward.
But apparently nearly everybody brought something, and by the time they get back from the graveside service, there were hot and cold dishes on every available surface in the kitchen and dining room, and coolers full of beverages.
Cassie tried to be appropriately grateful, but she felt strangely disconnected from everything-like it wasn’t real, like it didn’t matter. She didn’t know most of the people there, but everyone seemed to know her, and she was running out of things to say. She just kept repeating, “Thank you for coming.”
Eventually, the guests left, drifting out in ones and twos and then in groups, until it was just Cassie, Sam, Jack, Daniel and Teal’c. She was grateful that they stayed; she didn’t think she would be ready to be alone in the house anytime soon.
In fact, now that she thought about it, Cassie realized that she hadn’t been alone in the house since Sam and Daniel brought the news. She thought maybe Sam had called her friends’ parents and made sure that she always had somewhere she could be, if Sam or one of the others weren’t around.
Cassie changed out of her black dress with a sense of relief, feeling as though she was shedding some of the awfulness of the day. When she emerged in a pair of flannel pants and a t-shirt, she saw that the others had made themselves a little more comfortable-Sam had changed into jeans and a sweatshirt; Jack, Daniel, and Teal’c ditched their jackets and ties. Sam and Teal’c were drinking beers; Daniel and Jack had broken out her mom’s good scotch.
Cassie thought her mom probably would appreciate that.
She curled up in one corner of the couch, and Sam took the other end. Daniel sprawled in the loveseat and Jack and Teal’c took the recliners. It might have almost felt normal, if not for her mom’s glaring absence.
“Hey,” Jack said suddenly. “You remember that time that Janet blackmailed Dixon into getting a physical?” And then he launched into a story about her mom that highlighted how devious she could be-under the right circumstances.
That got the ball rolling, and they all started telling stories about her mom-funny ones, mostly, or silly ones, most that Cassie hadn’t heard before.
She hadn’t minded hearing about how brave her mom was, or how strong, or how good of a doctor she was-but Cassie had almost felt as though she didn’t know the person the speaker was talking about. Hearing everyone talk about her mom that way just made her feel remote, as though maybe Cassie had never known her at all.
But here and now, as her mom’s closest friends talked about practical jokes and threatening soldiers to get them to behave and nights out on the town, Cassie could recognize her mom again.
These were the people who knew her mom best, Cassie thought. They were the people who loved her best.
She fell asleep between one story and the next, and woke up still on the couch. Someone had thrown an afghan over her. She was alone in the living room, except for Jack, who was still in the recliner. In the gray light of predawn, Cassie could see that he was still awake.
“Jack?”
“Yeah, kiddo?”
“You’re still here,” she observed, and then winced at the inanity of the statement.
Jack didn’t seem to mind, though. He just said, “We’re all still here, actually.”
Cassie sighed in relief. Her grief was still a hard lump in her chest, and she knew it would overwhelm her again. The great, aching sense of loss that had risen up after Sam and Daniel delivered the news would never go away, but she felt a little less alone now.
“Thanks,” she said finally.
“Don’t mention it,” Jack replied. “You should try to get a little more sleep.”
Cassie nodded and burrowed back down under the blanket, feeling some small measure of peace.