Comments | enchantress0223: Total PWP

enchantress0223

Total PWP - Wincest

Oct 24, 2006 15:14

Ok, so I've given up the battle, and decided to make an attempt at a little fanfic. It's just a short bit with really no point, but it was fun to write. Hope you enjoy.

WARNING: Gay incetuous boys doing what gay incestuous boys do! (graphic m/m sex, incest, deffinatly not work safe)

( You know you want to read it! )

Comments 18

alasandalack October 24 2006, 20:24:33 UTC

...dude...

enchantress0223 October 24 2006, 23:40:19 UTC

...and I've rendered her speachless!

sappho413 October 24 2006, 20:31:11 UTC

Hot! Very hot! Now I wish I'd seen the show, lol.

enchantress0223 October 24 2006, 23:33:26 UTC

Thanks! There is deffinatly some chemestry between them on the siries. It just makes it that much easier to slash!

alchemyonfire October 24 2006, 22:43:54 UTC

Hot, sweet, not too damn bad for a first attempt. :D

Great job, hun!

enchantress0223 October 24 2006, 23:33:51 UTC

Thanks so much. :)

anonymous October 24 2006, 22:49:11 UTC

Dude this story is awesome! Hot, but touching, real, with nice sensory details, and overall just tight and well-written. It may be your first but please do not let it be your last. You are very good at this, you have captured the characters well and presented a wonderful version of their possible relationship.

Couple of tiny suggestions though. Always put a title, brief summary or something on the main page, I'd hate to have flipped through and missed a great "Dean and Sammy getting warm together in the shower story" because all I saw as I skimmed was a link. Also, though the flowery print is pretty, it really does make it harder to read. Simpler font is always better font for reading online. And, technically, if you're keeping close to canon as opposed to AU, they're not gay so much as bisexual or straight-except-for-my-brother.

enchantress0223 October 24 2006, 23:32:17 UTC

Thank you for the sugestions. I will go edit my post so that it has a better intro, as I am not as rushed now, and yeah, I know about the bi/straight thing, I was just being goofy in my cut. I'm glad you liked it though. Thanks.

zenamydog October 25 2006, 00:27:09 UTC

HI hon,

LOok just wanted to let you know that i tryed to read this, but it is so scrunched together i just could focus long enough.

Maybe you could put a line inbetween each paragraph, i think that would help.

Sorry!

enchantress0223 October 25 2006, 03:06:16 UTC

I really apreciate all the tips. I've never posted large amounts of writing so it helps a lot. I'll tinker and see what I can do to fix it. Thanks.

zenamydog October 25 2006, 13:52:26 UTC

You are so welcome. Always glad to help out a good writer!