15/31 Rage, contempt and green ice cream

[emeraldsedai]

I only met my paternal grandfather twice. The first time, I was about three. He took me for ice cream. I wanted “green” which, to my West Coast and three-year-old mind was self-evidently lime sherbet. To his East Coast sensibilities, it meant pistachio. I cried all the way home. He said, “Damn kid” and “How the hell am I supposed to know what green

Comments

[helenajust]

When I'm in a rage like that unfortunately I tend to cry with frustration, which is so detrimental to making my point of view and having it listened to that I feel even angrier. I'm glad you've found a method which helps you breath easier. I had not heard of tapping before.

It is scary how one can see behaviour patterns repeated from parent to child, and I suspect it's one reason why I never wanted children.

On a lighter note, I don't think I've ever had lime sorbet. I love pistachio ice-cream, though!

[emeraldsedai]

Emotional Freedom Technique, aka "tapping", has been a transformative tool for me for ten or twelve years. In the last year or so it has really taken off, and now there's a bestselling book on the subject. It's simple, and super-effective for defusing the activated, fight-or-flight state so common in PTSD.

Like you, I never wanted children--I was actively disturbed by the very idea. Naturally at age six it wasn't a conscious ethical decision, though it turned out that I could account for it ethically later in life. I think it was just a cellular-level certainty that children were a problem, based on the way I perceived myself.