My favorite mug bears these words of Teddy Roosevelt's: "Do what you can where you are with what you've got." I've learned so much from them! Now from you too. Thank you!!
Well, Teddy certainly did a lot! I'm not sure why it's such an arduous journey--for me, and for many people I know. "Know Who You Are, Be Who You Are" has been my map and compass for most of my life's journey, and yet that missing middle piece, "ACCEPT who you are," seems to have been unattainable, so many societal messages run counter to it.
I sincerely hope that people younger than I am will have had less monolithic, one-size-fits-all programming, and will be able to get that middle piece earlier in life than I have.
My thought was less about the ubiquity of media messages and more about their increasing variety.
Someone born since the 1990s (and who has internet access, which is most of 'em) has been exposed to so many images, so much variety! They see pretty fat girls modeling clothes. They see gay people portrayed as regular folks. Women as leaders. A black president. They have easy access to knowledge of sexual variety, dietary choices, music and movies of the world, images and stories of all kinds of people from all kinds of places doing all kinds of things in all kinds of combinations.
It seems to me that that variety of images and stories might make self-acceptance a little easier for young people today than it was for me.
I have not been good at commenting lately, but I just can't let this one go, Emerald.
If you have a fault, I'd say it's "unrelenting standards." And that's not a fault, it's a life schema. So you can't knit the super complicated sweater...that does not mean your mind is simple. I do believe I'm speaking to the writer of that brilliant novel, Restraint?
I understand the self-deprecating tendencies, as I have spent the last few days berating myself for various faults, but I do hope you can accept imperfect brilliance for what it is. Brilliance.
Hi Karen! I honestly wasn't coming at this topic from a self-deprecating perspective, though I can see how the post might have struck that note. I appreciate the gentle scold!
I'm really groping, as usual, towards a self-understanding that makes sense. To the extent that Restraint is a successful novel, I was able to write it because it's structurally simple. It's a linear story, running in a pretty straightforward way through time from Boy Meets Boy to The End. If it's brilliant (and you know I love you for saying that), it's because it has emotional impact, and that comes from the characters flowing in uncomplicated (if headlong) ways towards what they want, and smacking into the unavoidable consequences.
I was like the GoPro camera attached to their helmets. The documentary filmmaker along for the ride. I always, always get stuck if I try to be more than that in writing. And I've almost always tried to be more than that--to create complex, interwoven, multilayered tales with multiple points of view and nonlinear timelines--and
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I sincerely hope that people younger than I am will have had less monolithic, one-size-fits-all programming, and will be able to get that middle piece earlier in life than I have.
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Someone born since the 1990s (and who has internet access, which is most of 'em) has been exposed to so many images, so much variety! They see pretty fat girls modeling clothes. They see gay people portrayed as regular folks. Women as leaders. A black president. They have easy access to knowledge of sexual variety, dietary choices, music and movies of the world, images and stories of all kinds of people from all kinds of places doing all kinds of things in all kinds of combinations.
It seems to me that that variety of images and stories might make self-acceptance a little easier for young people today than it was for me.
Reply
If you have a fault, I'd say it's "unrelenting standards." And that's not a fault, it's a life schema. So you can't knit the super complicated sweater...that does not mean your mind is simple. I do believe I'm speaking to the writer of that brilliant novel, Restraint?
I understand the self-deprecating tendencies, as I have spent the last few days berating myself for various faults, but I do hope you can accept imperfect brilliance for what it is. Brilliance.
Reply
I'm really groping, as usual, towards a self-understanding that makes sense. To the extent that Restraint is a successful novel, I was able to write it because it's structurally simple. It's a linear story, running in a pretty straightforward way through time from Boy Meets Boy to The End. If it's brilliant (and you know I love you for saying that), it's because it has emotional impact, and that comes from the characters flowing in uncomplicated (if headlong) ways towards what they want, and smacking into the unavoidable consequences.
I was like the GoPro camera attached to their helmets. The documentary filmmaker along for the ride. I always, always get stuck if I try to be more than that in writing. And I've almost always tried to be more than that--to create complex, interwoven, multilayered tales with multiple points of view and nonlinear timelines--and ( ... )
Reply
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