A poem.

[elmerdagloostik]

Here is a poem that I wrote about a week ago.  I'm not completely done, there are quite a few rhythmic issues, I am aware.  However, I am stuck.  If anyone has any suggestions, please please divulge them.

--No Title For the Time Being--

Insecurities strengthened by you;
The mask goes on,
     So you have no clue.
My mask, my disguise, I now must don;
No

Comments

[ranmafluffysama]

It's really good. The only suggestion I could make would be to divide "Is it true true love will always persist" into two different lines. Probaly between the trues. Other than that I think even Simon Caul would find it acceptable.

[elmerdagloostik]

Oh I couldn't do that, it woudld mess with the pattern. Thanks, though. Simon Cowell judges singing, not writing, so I don't think he would care either way.