Thanks so much for making this! Oh, if I didn't already love that story to bits, now I love it even more. If possible. And I'll reiterate what I said the first time, this came out in a really amazing way. You absolutely had all three of them spot on.
So I started this fic at my in-laws over the Christmas holidays feeling slightly ashamed to be writing a sex scene with them in the next room.
Ouch! Once I kind of half-wrote a half-sex scene at school and almost got caught. Not a fine feeling. And the wedding line would have been more Shannon than Boone, indeed! And I loved the personal references there, it was really interesting to read. I do it too, from time to time.
It wasn’t as easy for her to return “to what it was” as she intended and was still all a flutter from last night. But I don’t think she ever felt the same way about Boone as he did about her. I think she secretly enjoyed having him as an older brother and would prefer that than anything else.Exactly my opinion. She'd have never felt the same way as he did but I think
( ... )
If I had to pick, I do think this was Sayid’s doing. I picture him straightening up Shannon’s tent after she died, perhaps wanting to keep everything as it was for while but mentally dividing up who should get what in the future because it was only sensible given the scarcity of their items. I think he remembered the fuss over the book and his role in accusations about the inhalers. Giving the book back to Sawyer was another way to make amends.
I love that! I take it as my canon. *nods* And I loved the way you used that cover as a link between the three of them. It was very clever and a great way of closing the circle.
Jack/Sawyer subtext! I don’t imagine Jack reads too much fiction or if he does it’s of the Tom Clancy/John Grisham variety with simple male heroes keeping the world safe.
YAY for subtext! When I read it the first time I burst out laughing even if I was completely teary. It was an awesome sentence and of course Jack reads only that kind of fiction! Sawyer, you need to improve his tastes.
I'm glad you didn't need any LSD goo to get through this commentary and I'm happy you found the remarks interesting. Looking back I think this was one of my better written stories.
I can only hope Darlton start to remember to do parallels also with the happy side of Watership Down.
Word. I seem to remember it ended with most of the bunnies okay. Hear that Darlton?
Excellent point again about Shannon and about the phantom limb.
I did think of your amputation research for A Weak Man Has Doubts when I went back over that section.
Edited because I just noticed part II of your comments! Wow!
I'm glad the Sayid part worked for you. At the time I wrote this I could have gone either way but I now think Shannon had kept yhe book, intending to read it.
Sawyer certainly seems to be lucky. Maybe once you get shot and survive, the island coats you in an invisible shield. That should mean Sayid is okay too.
I'm so happy you liked this story. Thanks again for the wonderful prompt that gave birth to it all.
I just wanted to say I'd actually never seen the story (because I completely suck at checking my flist) so I thoroughly enjoyed it AND the commentary. I think the commentary actually added to the experience, and especially loved that you said something about tying the paragraphs together through the narrators commenting on the cover. This was very, very informative and interesting!
I was so happy to see a commentary for this fic! I'm always interested in how an author's mind works in the process of writing, but especially so in this case - this fic has always really stuck out for me.
This won Best Gen Fic at lost_fic_awards in January 2008. And deservedly so. ;)
So I started this fic at my in-laws over the Christmas holidays feeling slightly ashamed to be writing a sex scene with them in the next room. Yeah, I've had this feeling before. Except with my parents instead of in-laws. I don't know which is worse. In-laws, probably.
It wasn’t as easy for her to return “to what it was” as she intended and was still all a flutter from last night. But I don’t think she ever felt the same way about Boone as he did about her. I think she secretly enjoyed having him as an older brother
That's an interesting thought. I've always wondered why Shannon did what she did that night in Sydney - whatever else may have been wrong with Boone, and however culpable he may have been in that situation, it's clear that he wasn't
( ... )
Ha! I was safer writing at my in-laws. They leave me alone. If I had been at my mother's, she would have stood beside me nattering the whole time and the story never would have been written.
I've always wondered why Shannon did what she did that night in Sydney - whatever else may have been wrong with Boone, and however culpable he may have been in that situation, it's clear that he wasn't going to act on his obsession with Shannon on his own. Was she trying to apologize for the way she'd treated him? Or just to screw up his mind even more, or as a form of leverage? Questions, questions...
All good questions. I sort of saw it as her not knowing any other way to respond to a man. I think she was used to seeing her body as some sort of prize. Maybe she thought offering it to Boone would make up for how she treated to him. Also, she probably had it in the back of her mind that by doing this, she would own him forever.
I think you're right, and that he'd go for naked if time allowed. If so, the traffic going to and from his tent must
( ... )
Part of me thinks as soon as he hears someone coming to his tent, Sawyer makes an effort to be only half dressed. LOL.
I loved your explanation of the phantom weight. As I told you in the comment to the fic, I loved that line, but having it explained to me makes it even more beautiful.
And of course I caught the reference to Aaron. I liked also the part about crying in front of Sawyer being better than crying in front of everyone. Sawyer is callous, but he is not judgmental - at least, not often. I loved also your comment about Sayid being practical as usual, even if saddened by Shannon's death and at the same time trying to make amends for the past. It's very him.
And the bunny on the cover was a great detail as well, it reflected nicely the feelings of every character.
Thanks for taking the time to read both the story and commentary. It was fun to do, if only to make Sawyer's half naked efforts my own personal canon.
And of course I caught the reference to Aaron.
Oh good! See, I should trust my readers and their vast knowledge about the show!
When I first wrote this I was very scared about writing Sayid but now I am more comfortable with him so I feel the details about him and the book would be the way to go.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts! I enjoyed hearing them.
Comments 9
So I started this fic at my in-laws over the Christmas holidays feeling slightly ashamed to be writing a sex scene with them in the next room.
Ouch! Once I kind of half-wrote a half-sex scene at school and almost got caught. Not a fine feeling. And the wedding line would have been more Shannon than Boone, indeed! And I loved the personal references there, it was really interesting to read. I do it too, from time to time.
It wasn’t as easy for her to return “to what it was” as she intended and was still all a flutter from last night. But I don’t think she ever felt the same way about Boone as he did about her. I think she secretly enjoyed having him as an older brother and would prefer that than anything else.Exactly my opinion. She'd have never felt the same way as he did but I think ( ... )
Reply
If I had to pick, I do think this was Sayid’s doing. I picture him straightening up Shannon’s tent after she died, perhaps wanting to keep everything as it was for while but mentally dividing up who should get what in the future because it was only sensible given the scarcity of their items. I think he remembered the fuss over the book and his role in accusations about the inhalers. Giving the book back to Sawyer was another way to make amends.
I love that! I take it as my canon. *nods* And I loved the way you used that cover as a link between the three of them. It was very clever and a great way of closing the circle.
Jack/Sawyer subtext! I don’t imagine Jack reads too much fiction or if he does it’s of the Tom Clancy/John Grisham variety with simple male heroes keeping the world safe.
YAY for subtext! When I read it the first time I burst out laughing even if I was completely teary. It was an awesome sentence and of course Jack reads only that kind of fiction! Sawyer, you need to improve his tastes.
Season one seemed to imply ( ... )
Reply
I can only hope Darlton start to remember to do parallels also with the happy side of Watership Down.
Word. I seem to remember it ended with most of the bunnies okay. Hear that Darlton?
Excellent point again about Shannon and about the phantom limb.
I did think of your amputation research for A Weak Man Has Doubts when I went back over that section.
Edited because I just noticed part II of your comments! Wow!
I'm glad the Sayid part worked for you. At the time I wrote this I could have gone either way but I now think Shannon had kept yhe book, intending to read it.
Sawyer certainly seems to be lucky. Maybe once you get shot and survive, the island coats you in an invisible shield. That should mean Sayid is okay too.
I'm so happy you liked this story. Thanks again for the wonderful prompt that gave birth to it all.
Reply
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This won Best Gen Fic at lost_fic_awards in January 2008.
And deservedly so. ;)
So I started this fic at my in-laws over the Christmas holidays feeling slightly ashamed to be writing a sex scene with them in the next room.
Yeah, I've had this feeling before. Except with my parents instead of in-laws. I don't know which is worse. In-laws, probably.
It wasn’t as easy for her to return “to what it was” as she intended and was still all a flutter from last night. But I don’t think she ever felt the same way about Boone as he did about her. I think she secretly enjoyed having him as an older brother
That's an interesting thought. I've always wondered why Shannon did what she did that night in Sydney - whatever else may have been wrong with Boone, and however culpable he may have been in that situation, it's clear that he wasn't ( ... )
Reply
I've always wondered why Shannon did what she did that night in Sydney - whatever else may have been wrong with Boone, and however culpable he may have been in that situation, it's clear that he wasn't going to act on his obsession with Shannon on his own. Was she trying to apologize for the way she'd treated him? Or just to screw up his mind even more, or as a form of leverage? Questions, questions...
All good questions. I sort of saw it as her not knowing any other way to respond to a man. I think she was used to seeing her body as some sort of prize. Maybe she thought offering it to Boone would make up for how she treated to him. Also, she probably had it in the back of her mind that by doing this, she would own him forever.
I think you're right, and that he'd go for naked if time allowed. If so, the traffic going to and from his tent must ( ... )
Reply
Part of me thinks as soon as he hears someone coming to his tent, Sawyer makes an effort to be only half dressed.
LOL.
I loved your explanation of the phantom weight. As I told you in the comment to the fic, I loved that line, but having it explained to me makes it even more beautiful.
And of course I caught the reference to Aaron. I liked also the part about crying in front of Sawyer being better than crying in front of everyone. Sawyer is callous, but he is not judgmental - at least, not often.
I loved also your comment about Sayid being practical as usual, even if saddened by Shannon's death and at the same time trying to make amends for the past. It's very him.
And the bunny on the cover was a great detail as well, it reflected nicely the feelings of every character.
Well done, and thanks for the commentary! :)
Reply
And of course I caught the reference to Aaron.
Oh good! See, I should trust my readers and their vast knowledge about the show!
When I first wrote this I was very scared about writing Sayid but now I am more comfortable with him so I feel the details about him and the book would be the way to go.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts! I enjoyed hearing them.
Reply
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