FIC: For Values of Success, PG, SGA, McKay/Sheppard
Title: For Values of Success
Author: Tara Keezer
Rating: PG
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Notes: Generally season 5; no spoilers. 1,330 words.
Summary: “He’s my boyfriend.” Sheppard’s voice was casual and friendly, in direct contrast to his hand, which gripped Rodney’s neck, and it hurt, damn it.
~*~*~
“He’s my boyfriend.” Sheppard’s voice was casual and friendly, in direct contrast to his hand, which gripped Rodney’s neck, and it hurt, damn it.
“I -” Rodney didn’t get any further than that, because Sheppard kissed him. Hard. But without tongue, and that almost pissed Rodney off more than the fact that Sheppard shut him up with a kiss.
A kiss without tongue was wrong on so many levels that Rodney couldn’t begin to count them.
“See?” Sheppard said. “Boyfriend. And I’m the jealous type, so I don’t like him going anywhere without me.”
Rodney was still simmering over the lack of tongue - totally unfair - so he almost missed the village chief - or head or whatever he was called - nodding hesitantly. “I understand, Colonel, the desire to keep what’s yours close to hand. But -”
“His? I’ll have you -” Sheppard kissed Rodney again. This time it was a little softer - Sheppard probably hurt his mouth during that first tongueless kiss - and the bastard still withheld his tongue. Not that Rodney was bitter or anything. Also, if Sheppard thought kissing him would work as a deterrent to Rodney talking, Sheppard had another think coming.
“That’s right,” Sheppard said when he pulled away from Rodney. His voice was a touch shaky, and Rodney thought, Hah! “I want to keep him close.”
Teyla was giving them both odd looks. Rodney concluded she noticed the lack of tongue and was as shocked as he, but professional that she was, she moved beyond her surprise and stepped into the conversation with, “As you can see, Chief Noovel, it is important for Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay to remain together. Perhaps your priests can bless them both for the visit to your temple?”
Noovel scratched his head. “I suppose. It’s just - we aren’t used to - well -”
God. Rodney was going to have to save the day again. And it was all Sheppard’s fault. If he’d just kissed with tongue to begin with, Noovel wouldn’t be hesitating, he’d be herding them to the temple. Rodney pulled Sheppard around and cupped his face with both hands, muttering, “You totally owe me.” Thank god the trick with his thumbs worked just as well on Sheppard’s jaw as it did on Rodney’s cat, because Sheppard’s mouth opened nicely. Rodney didn’t hesitate. He pushed his tongue between Sheppard’s lips, and finally he was getting a proper taste of - of -
“Orange juice? You had orange juice this morning? You bastard!” Rodney stumbled away - though not before having a chance to gloat over Sheppard’s stunned expression - and pulled his pack off. Granted, his mouth hadn’t gone tingly yet, but there was no telling with these things.
In the background, he heard Teyla explaining that Rodney had allergies, but she was certain Rodney was mistaken about what Colonel Sheppard drank that morning, and truly, the two men loved one another with a deep and sincere commitment. Sheppard looked like he wanted to kill Rodney, which - hello - all the orange-juice-guzzling-bastard had to do was keep kissing him. It didn’t matter that Rodney hadn’t gotten so much as a single hive yet, it was the principle of the thing, and Sheppard was so paying for that when they got back to Atlantis.
“I’m not sure about this, Mistress Teyla,” Noovel said. “Couples are, of course, blessed so that they may visit the Table of the Ancestors together, but they’re usually - well. They’re usually a man and a - a woman. Married.”
Rodney was too busy with his self-check to answer that bit of idiocy, and Colonel Hypocrite was still glaring at Rodney. Teyla started to say something, but Ronon stepped in with, “Not enough women where they’re from.”
Noovel blinked. “What?”
“Not enough women. Easier on everyone if men pair up.” Ronon scratched his armpit - right near Rodney’s nose - and Jesus Christ, if he wasn’t already Sheppard’s boyfriend, he’d probably start humping Ronon’s leg. No armpit that hairy should smell so good.
“Um, right,” Sheppard said. “Rodney and me, we’re a couple. Not enough women.”
“Ah.” Noovel frowned. “I think Tia Adnil may still object. They’re not actually married.”
Ronon - and since when was he so talkative? - spoke again and proved once and for all that he was evil, evil, evil. “They could get married here. Rodney’s always wanted an off-world wedding.”
At that point, Rodney opened his mouth to object, and of course that was when Sheppard finally came to his senses and slipped Rodney some tongue. There was still a faint hint of juice in Sheppard’s breath, but Rodney’s throat hadn’t closed up yet, and honestly? If he had to die, there were worse ways to go. Way worse, because Sheppard, when he was putting some thought to it, turned out to be a hell of a good kisser. Good enough, at any rate, to make Rodney whimper, and there was no shame in that, none at all. In fact, Rodney defied anyone to kiss Sheppard without whimpering, because it couldn’t be done. And hey! If Rodney rubbed Sheppard’s neck just behind and slightly below his left ear, he could get Sheppard to whimper right back at him.
For the first time in their ten-minute-old relationship, Rodney didn’t regret being Sheppard’s boyfriend. Not at all. But then Ronon pulled him away from Sheppard, just when Rodney had finally gotten him trained on the whole kissing-with-tongue-thing, and that wasn’t fair or right or anything good. Also? There was no reason for Ronon to be laughing at them.
“As I was saying, their commitment is deep and sincere,” Teyla said. It was only because Rodney knew her so well that he could tell she was laughing, too.
“Er, yes,” Noovel said, shifting slightly and making googly eyes at Sheppard. Rodney batted Ronon away and stepped next to Sheppard, putting his arm around him and glaring at Noovel. “Um. A wedding, then?”
~*~*~
Six hours later, they went back through the gate without a new power source and without so much as a trade agreement. Tia Adnil, as it turned out, had very firm opinions on what a marriage was, and not one of them included a man and a man vowing eternal love to each other. They still might have pulled off a trade agreement, but -
“- ney said she was a close-minded harridan who wouldn’t know true love if it bit her in the ass.” Sheppard shot a look at Rodney like it was all his fault, when clearly it wasn’t.
Woolsey sighed. “I don’t suppose there’s any chance of salvaging a relationship with them?”
“It is unlikely,” Teyla said. “And to be honest, I do not believe it to be in our best interests. The quality of their tava beans was poor. We can trade for better elsewhere.”
“Very well. We’ll hold off on the full debriefing until tomorrow morning.” Woolsey dismissed them with a nod, and Sheppard returned it before stalking out of the gateroom without even looking at Rodney.
For a moment, Rodney stood there thinking, The hell? Then Sheppard stalked - stomped, really - back into the gateroom and grabbed Rodney by his tac vest to pull him along. Rodney stumbled behind, ready to give Sheppard a piece of his mind as soon as they slowed down, because yes, even though it was kind of hot to be dragged like that, Rodney wasn’t Jane, and he was fully capable of getting to Sheppard’s quarters under his own steam.
Except they didn’t quite make it to Sheppard’s quarters or even Rodney’s. Instead, they made it as far as storage closet 5-B8, and as soon as they were inside and the door was locked, Sheppard finally kissed Rodney again - with tongue, thanks to Rodney’s excellent tutelage. It was only a few seconds before he was whimpering and so was Sheppard, and even though they could never go back to MX-whatever again, Rodney got a boyfriend out of it, so he counted the mission as a complete win.
Author: Tara Keezer
Rating: PG
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Notes: Generally season 5; no spoilers. 1,330 words.
Summary: “He’s my boyfriend.” Sheppard’s voice was casual and friendly, in direct contrast to his hand, which gripped Rodney’s neck, and it hurt, damn it.
~*~*~
“He’s my boyfriend.” Sheppard’s voice was casual and friendly, in direct contrast to his hand, which gripped Rodney’s neck, and it hurt, damn it.
“I -” Rodney didn’t get any further than that, because Sheppard kissed him. Hard. But without tongue, and that almost pissed Rodney off more than the fact that Sheppard shut him up with a kiss.
A kiss without tongue was wrong on so many levels that Rodney couldn’t begin to count them.
“See?” Sheppard said. “Boyfriend. And I’m the jealous type, so I don’t like him going anywhere without me.”
Rodney was still simmering over the lack of tongue - totally unfair - so he almost missed the village chief - or head or whatever he was called - nodding hesitantly. “I understand, Colonel, the desire to keep what’s yours close to hand. But -”
“His? I’ll have you -” Sheppard kissed Rodney again. This time it was a little softer - Sheppard probably hurt his mouth during that first tongueless kiss - and the bastard still withheld his tongue. Not that Rodney was bitter or anything. Also, if Sheppard thought kissing him would work as a deterrent to Rodney talking, Sheppard had another think coming.
“That’s right,” Sheppard said when he pulled away from Rodney. His voice was a touch shaky, and Rodney thought, Hah! “I want to keep him close.”
Teyla was giving them both odd looks. Rodney concluded she noticed the lack of tongue and was as shocked as he, but professional that she was, she moved beyond her surprise and stepped into the conversation with, “As you can see, Chief Noovel, it is important for Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay to remain together. Perhaps your priests can bless them both for the visit to your temple?”
Noovel scratched his head. “I suppose. It’s just - we aren’t used to - well -”
God. Rodney was going to have to save the day again. And it was all Sheppard’s fault. If he’d just kissed with tongue to begin with, Noovel wouldn’t be hesitating, he’d be herding them to the temple. Rodney pulled Sheppard around and cupped his face with both hands, muttering, “You totally owe me.” Thank god the trick with his thumbs worked just as well on Sheppard’s jaw as it did on Rodney’s cat, because Sheppard’s mouth opened nicely. Rodney didn’t hesitate. He pushed his tongue between Sheppard’s lips, and finally he was getting a proper taste of - of -
“Orange juice? You had orange juice this morning? You bastard!” Rodney stumbled away - though not before having a chance to gloat over Sheppard’s stunned expression - and pulled his pack off. Granted, his mouth hadn’t gone tingly yet, but there was no telling with these things.
In the background, he heard Teyla explaining that Rodney had allergies, but she was certain Rodney was mistaken about what Colonel Sheppard drank that morning, and truly, the two men loved one another with a deep and sincere commitment. Sheppard looked like he wanted to kill Rodney, which - hello - all the orange-juice-guzzling-bastard had to do was keep kissing him. It didn’t matter that Rodney hadn’t gotten so much as a single hive yet, it was the principle of the thing, and Sheppard was so paying for that when they got back to Atlantis.
“I’m not sure about this, Mistress Teyla,” Noovel said. “Couples are, of course, blessed so that they may visit the Table of the Ancestors together, but they’re usually - well. They’re usually a man and a - a woman. Married.”
Rodney was too busy with his self-check to answer that bit of idiocy, and Colonel Hypocrite was still glaring at Rodney. Teyla started to say something, but Ronon stepped in with, “Not enough women where they’re from.”
Noovel blinked. “What?”
“Not enough women. Easier on everyone if men pair up.” Ronon scratched his armpit - right near Rodney’s nose - and Jesus Christ, if he wasn’t already Sheppard’s boyfriend, he’d probably start humping Ronon’s leg. No armpit that hairy should smell so good.
“Um, right,” Sheppard said. “Rodney and me, we’re a couple. Not enough women.”
“Ah.” Noovel frowned. “I think Tia Adnil may still object. They’re not actually married.”
Ronon - and since when was he so talkative? - spoke again and proved once and for all that he was evil, evil, evil. “They could get married here. Rodney’s always wanted an off-world wedding.”
At that point, Rodney opened his mouth to object, and of course that was when Sheppard finally came to his senses and slipped Rodney some tongue. There was still a faint hint of juice in Sheppard’s breath, but Rodney’s throat hadn’t closed up yet, and honestly? If he had to die, there were worse ways to go. Way worse, because Sheppard, when he was putting some thought to it, turned out to be a hell of a good kisser. Good enough, at any rate, to make Rodney whimper, and there was no shame in that, none at all. In fact, Rodney defied anyone to kiss Sheppard without whimpering, because it couldn’t be done. And hey! If Rodney rubbed Sheppard’s neck just behind and slightly below his left ear, he could get Sheppard to whimper right back at him.
For the first time in their ten-minute-old relationship, Rodney didn’t regret being Sheppard’s boyfriend. Not at all. But then Ronon pulled him away from Sheppard, just when Rodney had finally gotten him trained on the whole kissing-with-tongue-thing, and that wasn’t fair or right or anything good. Also? There was no reason for Ronon to be laughing at them.
“As I was saying, their commitment is deep and sincere,” Teyla said. It was only because Rodney knew her so well that he could tell she was laughing, too.
“Er, yes,” Noovel said, shifting slightly and making googly eyes at Sheppard. Rodney batted Ronon away and stepped next to Sheppard, putting his arm around him and glaring at Noovel. “Um. A wedding, then?”
~*~*~
Six hours later, they went back through the gate without a new power source and without so much as a trade agreement. Tia Adnil, as it turned out, had very firm opinions on what a marriage was, and not one of them included a man and a man vowing eternal love to each other. They still might have pulled off a trade agreement, but -
“- ney said she was a close-minded harridan who wouldn’t know true love if it bit her in the ass.” Sheppard shot a look at Rodney like it was all his fault, when clearly it wasn’t.
Woolsey sighed. “I don’t suppose there’s any chance of salvaging a relationship with them?”
“It is unlikely,” Teyla said. “And to be honest, I do not believe it to be in our best interests. The quality of their tava beans was poor. We can trade for better elsewhere.”
“Very well. We’ll hold off on the full debriefing until tomorrow morning.” Woolsey dismissed them with a nod, and Sheppard returned it before stalking out of the gateroom without even looking at Rodney.
For a moment, Rodney stood there thinking, The hell? Then Sheppard stalked - stomped, really - back into the gateroom and grabbed Rodney by his tac vest to pull him along. Rodney stumbled behind, ready to give Sheppard a piece of his mind as soon as they slowed down, because yes, even though it was kind of hot to be dragged like that, Rodney wasn’t Jane, and he was fully capable of getting to Sheppard’s quarters under his own steam.
Except they didn’t quite make it to Sheppard’s quarters or even Rodney’s. Instead, they made it as far as storage closet 5-B8, and as soon as they were inside and the door was locked, Sheppard finally kissed Rodney again - with tongue, thanks to Rodney’s excellent tutelage. It was only a few seconds before he was whimpering and so was Sheppard, and even though they could never go back to MX-whatever again, Rodney got a boyfriend out of it, so he counted the mission as a complete win.