Birthday fic for... me! (TIMING!) - Administration, Carnac, PG

[elarielf]

Title: First Impressions
Characters: Jean-Baptiste Carnac, Keir Warrick, Melissa not-yet-Warrick
Rating: PG
Warnings/Contains: Introspection, judgementalness, oblique references to sexual preferences, dialogue-light
Word count: 2109
Notes: I am not as smart, nor as observant as Carnac. But then again, considering what an ass he is, I'm okay with

Comments

[shirogiku]

I declare it a success:)
Something is wrong with me - I shouldn't be so happy about seeing Carnac! :D You're doing his voice very well - self-confident, unhurried, with a touch of disdain towards everyone and everything, eager for at least some challenge...

Can I post a link to the fic on the fan comm?

An evening reading and finishing off the Bordeaux from last night sounded far more pleasant than rubbing elbows with the masses. Aww, Carnac, such a refined snob<3

'sycophant' is a very Carnac word too.

I think you captured very well his tendecy to write people off and his condescending(?)-ish attitude.

Carnac's assessment of Warrick's face fits excellent. I also enjoyed their first banter - the not!talking and dancing around felt very authentic.

No offence to Dilly the doppelganger, but I've always found it hilarious when someone limits her relevance as a person to 'she looks a female Keir->sexual fantasies'

MELISSA.

YES. JUST YES. Cold and posessive and prudish.

“I was pleasantly surprised at the invitation.” Jean-Baptiste

[elarielf]

YAY! I'm glad this worked. Somewhat at least. :p

I liked making Carnac's initial assessment of Warrick somewhat flawed, and evolving over time - not something he's used to.

There's a conversation between Carnac and Warrick where Carnac basically says that he predicted Warrick's marriage and subsequent divorce, as well as seeing his sexual predilictions, even before Warrick knew. I, frankly, believed it completely. ;)

Hee! Well, about Dilly, at least Carnac isn't the type to sexualize women in any way.

Ah, Melissa. Carnac presented a bland exterior and she fell for it - assuming he wasn't anyone important. I do feel rather sorry for her - she's outmatched in her own way as Toreth was. Not a dozen lines of dialogue and Carnac has assessed and dismissed her. XD But at least this time he backs off rather than actively ruining things. :/

I would love it if you'd link to it - I should make a note that this is actually for you. BRB, editing! XD

[shirogiku]

Okay, linked! Expect a wave of admirers. Or more like a trickle, but I digress.

You should check this out:

http://captive-princes.livejournal.com/35446.html#cutid1

P.S.

[shirogiku]

I made Mom bake PANCAKES.

Re: P.S.

[elarielf]

LOL! How very domestic, Shiro. ♥

Re: P.S.

[shirogiku]

I forgot to mention I loved the joke about socioanalysts and sheep ♥

[pensnest]

Very nice indeed. I think you've got an excellent tone here, detailed but cold in a way that definitely feels like Carnac.

[elarielf]

Thank you! I tend to write dialogue-heavy stuff, so this was a bit of an experiment for me. XD

I'm glad Carnac's voice came through okay.

[hpstrangelove]

First, I want to appologize for not reading this as soon as shirogiku sent me the link. I don't get on-line as much on weekends as I do during the week (since being on-line is part of my job).

Second, you did a wonderful job. As I told shirogiku when I commented on her Aaron fic, anyone who writes fanfic for the Administration Series has my undying respect. The Administration is so perfectly written that it's intimidating to try and add anything to it, but you did great.

It seems readers either love or hate Carnac. I find him a fascinating character, as complicated as Toreth. You've captured his attitude perfectly. I love how you have their first encounter, the banter with Melissa, Carnac's inner thoughts - the only thing missing is the sex scene! (Yes, I'm a hard-core slasher, so I'm always looking for the sex scene ;-)

[elarielf]

Shiro is such a great cheerleader/motivator/inspiration/pimp. :p

Carnac is so... slimy. I love him as a character, and I actually agree with a lot of his positions, even after he facilitates the "New Administration", but he is just. So. Slimy. XD

For me, he generates less sympathy than Torath because he's never been a victim, while still espousing a disconnect from humanity (feeling himself above whereas Toreth simply seems to see himself as apart). Also, Toreth may be screwed up six ways from Sunday, but he's also remarkably entertaining about it.

Sorry about the lack of smut (particularly in this fandom) but... Carnac. :p

Thanks!

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