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yoona-centri (ft. yoona/luhan, changmin/yoona)
angst, drama
pg, 825words
Yoona stares at her phone, as is rings and vibrates in her palms. Luhan, the name displays, which used to be saved as 'Hubby', she bitterly smiles at the memory. But, things are about to change. No, they have already changed and she isn't sure if it likes it or not. Her thumb hovers over the answer button as she contemplates whether to pick up and answer or just let it go to her voice mail, again.
Yoona isn't so sure anymore, about anything. Yoona's too confused to comprehend her life altogether. Yoona's just one big blot of mess, though she'd never admit it. Her life seems all a blur and she isn't sure whom to blame.
It could be all his fault, Yoona thinks as she reminisces.
Luhan steps into her life in a beautiful summer. The Chinese in a job transfer to Korea, with his accented Korean and eyes that seems lost in the foreign land. At first, his crooked smile and twinkling eyes never catches her attention. But, hers big heartily laughter and shining bright eyes catches his and he's a goner, just like that. Months of chasing her, perusing her, he finally succeeded. Im Yoona becomes Xi Luhan's and later Im Yoona becomes Xi Yoona. He places a ring in her finger and claims her as his and she has never been any happier.
Months later, his business in Korea ends and he returns home, tugging along his bride. But, she's not welcomed. His family turns their back on her. On a foreign land she becomes one with no one to rely on. That turns her grim, she lashes on him, they fight. Still he assures her, he's there for her. Always, forever, no matter what, Xi Luhan is there to stay with Im Yoona, he promises.
Still, for Im Yoona, the promise isn't enough.
So it's all my fault, Yoona decides, thinking nothing ever seems enough for her, nothing ever seems to fulfill her, nothing ever seems to content her. She always wants more, and maybe, just maybe, it has been her fault all along.
She thinks back to the time, when she had packed all her bags and moved back to Korea. Then she has been moving here and there, visiting family in Japan, catching up with friends, going off on trips. She has been going off around with men, just playing around. Her family doesn't know what to do with her. They want to be there for her, but the don't know how. They aren't even sure if they are even needed at all.
She starts losing all her rationality. Im Yoona is a just like a merry-go-round, she just is there going round and round, she isn't living. Luhan calls her several times, which most of the time goes unanswered. Her voice mail is filled with his requests, him begging her to return home. Their home. She tries to discover herself all over again, but she isn't sure if she's doing things right. The ring still lies in her fourth finger and Im Yoona just is there, but, she isn't living.
Until, she meets him.
I could blame him for making my life a messy whirlwind, she considers.
Their first meeting happens in the most unconventional and weirdest of place. She walking at a protest relay which she gets dragged in by circumstances. It's a phase she's going through, she thinks. He's a freelance journalist, Shim Changmin is the name. He catches her attention as he snaps a picture of her from his camera and she requests for that picture to be removed.
He agrees on one condition, a dinner treat. She hastily agrees. One dinner becomes two. Two becomes more. It's not just dinners anymore. It's more. Changmin makes her smile after a long time, genuinely smile. She thinks she's getting up on her feet once again. She tells her about her story, the tale of the ring that lies in her finger, the story of the phone calls she leaves unanswered. He listens and listens. He says he's there to wait, for as long as it takes, but still, Im Yoona really isn't sure anymore.
Why did I leave Luhan? She questions herself. Was it just his family, is it more? Did I do well by just walking out? And is taking off the ring the best choice of all? She thinks, she contemplates, she ponders. That's all she's doing right now. Wondering, thinking, pondering, contemplating, considering what's best for her. Would she ever arrive at the final decision? Will Changmin really wait? Would she ever realise whose fault it really is? She has no idea at all.
Her phone rings and it's Luhan, again. She finally decides to pick and presses her phone against her ears.
“Yoona.”
“Hello.”
"So, are you sure... about the divorce papers?”
And he leaves her, in a train of thoughts, once again wondering whom to blame.