Not so Small anymore....
The YoungMan turned 14 yesterday - among other things we gave was his first kitchen knife (a decent quality paring knife) and a copy of the 1st Edition Player's Handbook for AD&D.
He graduates 8th Grade tonight.
My boots fit him and sylvarthorne wears an pair if his old snow boots (a couple of years old now) outside in the winter to get wood for the fire. He ( Read more... )
He graduates 8th Grade tonight.
My boots fit him and sylvarthorne wears an pair if his old snow boots (a couple of years old now) outside in the winter to get wood for the fire. He ( Read more... )
Comments 7
I particularly miss your posts about what's for dinner and how things are in your relationships with phoenixprime and sylvarthorne but understand privacy concerns and preferences on those.
Reply
I think I can manage more food posts. I made a killer chicken dish the other night.
Chicken breast cooked and seared in a mix of Jaemsons, Liquid Smoke, and Basalmic - with a squirt of Dijon on top at the last moment to cook in. Then served it over a bed of chopped mixed greens with the reduced liquid as a dressing.
What do you want to know on the relationship front? phoenixprime and I continue to have the same struggles but we still love one another deeply. sylvarthorne is struggling right now pretty hard, we're having one of those spots where we both are having to lean into the challenging aspects of O/p. My part of that work is not backing down like I hav a tendency to do, her work is... well, that would be for her to answer not me I think.
Feel free to ping her and ask - it's not like she's under any orders of silence. She's just hunkers down and isolates herself when things are rough - a bad habit and one we're trying to change.
D.
Reply
=)
Struggles exist. I think sometimes more people tend toward not sharing, or over sharing. A balanced level of sharing of struggles is rare, in my experience (with myself and others.) I, too, tend toward the hunker down approach.
Reply
Hunkering down is precisely one of the things I'm working on overcoming, actually - in particular, around D. It's a safety mechanism that worked well for what I needed it for, but it's somewhat counterproductive in this relationship. Strangely enough!
:)
Reply
i miss reading what you write. i enjoy hearing about your dynamic with sylvarthorne because, as you've pointed out before, there are similarities to my and my master's dynamic in the loyalty/fealty aspect of it. we are in the process of instilling more expectations, especially publicly, and while i need and want them, i am still rather uncomfortable with them and trying to work through that.
Reply
We're not quite so focused on public expectations but more on internal focus and attitude. Behaviour can reflect that, but it's a by-product not the goal to be sure.
There is also more work on both of us being more transparent (something sylvarthorne really struggles with) along with figuring out the most effective ways of reinforcing the behavior that we want to see. Which recursively leads back to the protocols and behaviors that aren't really the goal, but end up being the markers and stepping stones along the path.
Finding the balance that works for us - not too intrusive and not too relaxed - is, of course, the struggle that I think most M/s folks have. The complicating issue for us is the presence of the YoungMan and our need for a certain amount of discretion due to professional boundaries both for myself and for phoenixprime. There is also a pretty ( ... )
Reply
Leave a comment