[Fic] "Samsara" -- Saiyuki

[edenfalling]

I'd like to say, by way of preface, that I haven't taken up writing Saiyuki fanfiction as a regular thing. This is basically a character study, or a relationship study, as well as an attempt to explain something that's been puzzling me. It's pretty dark, but given the fandom and characters, that's kind of par for the course

Comments

[jinxaire]

This is lovely and tragic, the imagery and metaphoric language was beautiful. I really liked the way the two timelines were interchanged with one another and the finality and reflection of the ending scene. I think Kanan's POV was just right, already a little emotionally flawed before her capture then her slow unhinging.

Tragic fic but you really did a great job with it.

[edenfalling]

Thank you! This story was mostly an attempt to explain Saiyuki backstory to myself, because Kanan's suicide nagged at me for weeks after I read that arc. It seemed odd for someone who had such a bond to her brother, and who was willing to defy all kinds of social conventions to be with him, to then turn around and kill herself the moment they were reunited. The tension between their bond and the shattering of that bond (and the way being apart obviously made both Kanan and Gonou crazier than before) is very interesting to me

[jinxaire]

Tee hee, thanks. Mmm... Dr Cho. ;-)

From what I understand (from some of Minekura's translated timelines and whatnot), their parents divorced, the father taking Kanan and their mother taking Gonou. Then, they were abandoned separately at the orphanages. I think having your parent willingly abandon you would probably cause even more mental issues than becoming an orphan through a parent's death, so that left plenty of room for all of the insecurities and hang ups that those two had.

I agree that it was the pregnancy that pushed Kanan over the final edge. I think you communicated her desire to shield and protect Gonou really well, and I like the take on the blindness. I find myself hoping that it was a misguided attempt to protect Gonou that she took her life in canon and not a more selfish reason after everything Gonou went through and did for her.

[edenfalling]

From what I understand (from some of Minekura's translated timelines and whatnot), their parents divorced, the father taking Kanan and their mother taking Gonou. Then, they were abandoned separately at the orphanages.

Wow. Yeah, that would go pretty far toward permanently screwing kids up. First it's all, "No, you can't have anyone but me to care about," and then it's, "Oh, and by the way, I don't want you either."