(no subject)
Miranda & Lisa: A Love Story
(told backwards, through a series of one shots)
Sacrilege
Inspiree par Coleen (musicinferno/aposse), make sure you read her wonderful fic Words & Noise!
Part "One:" Paramount
Pairing: Miranda Priestly/Lisa Metzger; established
Summary: After reading Words & Noise I decided to watch Prime again. Then the idea fore the first one was brought on by Lisa's line in Prime: "Religion is... paramount in people's lives." Then I decided to tell the story backwards...
Disclaimer: I don't own Prime. I don't own the Devil Wears Prada. I don't own Meryl Streep. (Too bad, eh?) No infringement is intended.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Meryl-on-Meryl pairing.
Three days earlier...
Miranda and Lisa stepped into the market. Miranda hadn't been to a plein air market since her mother took her when she was a child. She felt both out of place and a sense of coming home.
Lisa's fingers tickled Miranda's palm. Miranda blushed and bit back a smile before taking Lisa's hand. Lisa gave it a squeeze, "thanks for coming with me."
"You're thanking me for coming with you? I basically had to threaten you to let me come along." Miranda smirked.
"Eh, whatever. No matter what my original feelings were I'm glad you're here now, so shut-up." Lisa pouted and Miranda laughed.
Miranda let Lisa lead through the aisles of fresh food, Miranda had a personal shopper -- any one of her bereaved assistants -- and didn't plan to do any shopping for herself.
"Oh shit." Lisa looked across the market, seeing her own therapist, Rita, perusing the leafy vegetables. Memories of "stealthily" hiding from Dave and Rafi in the furniture store sprang to mind.
"What?" Miranda looked up from a pamphlet on how to get children to eat vegetables. "Are you okay?"
"It's my therapist! I didn't tell her about you," Lisa ducked behind a display of peaches. "Hide!"
"You didn't tell your therapist anything about me?" Miranda demanded, "we've been seeing each other for a month. You see your therapist twice a week, that's eight chances you had to mention me, eight hours of your talking about everything else under the sun and not one mention of me? At all?"
"Miranda! Please."
Miranda scoffed, "she has no context for me, there's no reason for me to hide." Miranda thought for a moment and continued with renewed vigor, "there's no reason for you to hide either! We aren't doing anything wrong."
"Yet." Lisa rolled her eyes.
Miranda grinned, "yet?"
Lisa blushed a full body blush, "don't read too much into that."
"Lisaleh, how could I not?" Miranda couldn't stop herself from grinning. "What's her name?"
"Whose?" Lisa asked, distractedly.
"The therapist."
"Her name's Rita." Lisa said peering over the mountain of fuzzy fruit. Rita was still in sight picking out a head of lettuce.
Miranda took a deep breath in order to muster up the wind power to project her voice all the way to leafy vegetables. Lisa looked up at her with mild concern. "Ri-" Miranda got halfway through the two syllable name before Lisa shoved a peach into her mouth.
Miranda took a bite out of the soft fruit, trying not to choke on it as she laughed. Lisa watched her scandalized. The peach vendor looked offended. Lisa pulled a dollar out of her pocket and handed it to him. "Keep the change."
Miranda laughed harder.
"Have mercy on an old woman, Miranda, shut-up." Lisa pleaded as she ducked behind the peaches again. This time Miranda ducked with her, careful to avoid any contact between the ground and anything but the bottoms of her shoes.
Miranda took another bite of the peach. "It's delicious."
Lisa smirked at her, smiling despite herself, "if you're trying to be sexy, try not to take huge bites of it. Eating out is not literal."
"Oh, I know." Miranda assured her.
Lisa blushed again and couldn't believe she'd been the instigator of that whole conversation. Mein Gott, she thought, that woman makes it difficult to resist temptation. Squatting behind a display of peaches, carefully perched to protect her Louboutins and Bill Blass pants from the dirty market ground. For me. She's out of her comfort zone for me.
Lisa was so distracted by her thoughts that she didn't even hear Rita approaching the fruits. "I'll take four peaches, Omar."
"Absolutely, Rita," the peach vendor answered, grabbing four peaches and putting them in a bag, Lisa ducked down lower. "When are you going to bring me more of your peach curry. You've got me hooked."
Rita laughed, the bag rustled as she held it up, "you'll have to wait at least as long as it takes me to make it."
Miranda took in a breath to speak and Lisa immediately covered her mouth, cupping the back of her head for good measure to avoid Miranda backing away from the hand. She felt Miranda's lips curl into a smile against her sensitive palm. Lisa felt like she was melting into Miranda, despite all her best efforts, she was drowning in Miranda.
Miranda was offering the life raft willingly, but still Lisa was drowning. She was still at a loss about whether or not she just wanted to drown or whether she'd allow Miranda to pull her from the water.
Finally Rita was out of sight and Lisa released Miranda. Miranda stood up, brushing herself off. "You're ridiculous," she accused with a twinkle of mischief in her eye. She took the last bite of her peach and handed the pit to a confused peach vendor.
Lisa's hand was over her heart, trying to quell her frazzled Jewish nerves. "You can be really insensitive." Lisa said without any bite.
Miranda shrugged, "no one has ever accused me of being sensitive." Miranda shook her head, "Lisa, she's your therapist, if there's anyone you could tell about an extra-marital affair it should be your therapist."
"It's not an extra-marital affair yet." Lisa corrected.
"There's that yet again. If you consider it inevitable why can't you just accept that you are having an extra-marital affair?"
"Because then that makes you real." Lisa sighed.
"And up until this point I've been a figment of your imagination? I'll have to tell my children. They'll be devastated that we don't really exist."
"You're incorrigible." Lisa laughed, "'I'm opening up to you and you're teasing me."
"I'm not your therapist, I'm your lover. I'm allowed to tease you." Miranda quipped.
This time, Lisa didn't take exception to her word usage. Even if they weren't sleeping together, she did know that they were lovers. They were silent for a while as they resumed their hand holding and Lisa picked out her meat and her produce.
Lisa walked closer to the fish. Lisa had learned to look straight at the carp and not to even bother with the more expensive -- delicious -- fish. However, having Miranda with her was enough of a variation in her routine to throw her off her game and her eyes landed on the scallops. Then the haddock. Then the salmon. Then the cod. Then the perch, the tuna and the swordfish. She bit her lip, feeling like she was going to pass out from the indecision.
Lisa bit her lip and then reached for the carp. Miranda yanked on her, pulling her hand away from her safety fish. "What?"
"Carp is disgusting."
"It's a staple." Lisa argued, trying to reach for it again, and again Miranda yanked her back. "Oh please." She rolled her eyes. "You weigh 100 pounds soaking wet, you think you're stronger than me?"
"That swordfish steak looks spectacular." Miranda ignored the insinuation about her strength.
"It's expensive." Lisa frowned.
"Oh, it's what? Fifteen dollars a pound?" Miranda smirked, "I've personally paid you four hundred dollars, I know you can afford it."
"Did your mother ever serve swordfish?" Lisa gave Miranda her very best mom look.
Miranda scoffed, "no. She served carp." Miranda crossed her arms across her chest, "but that only serves my point. Lisa, this is your chance to not become your mother. You are in no danger of dipping below the poverty line by buying food that you actually like."
Lisa stood conflicted. After a long internal deliberation she looked up at Miranda, and hesitantly asked, "what if I said I like carp?"
"I'd call you a liar and track down your therapist and tell her to add compulsive liar to your list of, what do you call them? Your nuances?"
"As a therapist, I don't want to get caught up in labeling myself with undiagnosed conditions."
"As a therapist, why can't can't you diagnose yourself?"
"I am the least unbiased person when it comes to my own mental health."
"Wait. You're trying to distract me. Buy the swordfish." Miranda snapped, extending her arm to point at the fish. Lisa opened her mouth to protest and Miranda cut her off sharply, "that's all."
"You have control issues." Lisa grumbled as she paid for the swordfish.
Miranda just grinned, taking one of Lisa's bags so she could hold her hand. On the walk back to Lisa's apartment building she spotted her favorite bakery and realized she needed a loaf of bread and bagels. Standing next to her dutifully, Miranda watched Lisa point out the bread she wanted and the bagels she wanted.
"Could you toast one of the bagels for me?" Lisa asked as she paid for the baked goods.
The man behind the counter nodded and put the bagel into a conveyer toaster. Miranda shook her head, "Lisa, you don't have a free hand for a bagel."
Lisa looked over at her, "oh ye of little faith." She said as she pushed the bags up her arm until they rest in the crook of her elbow. "There is always a hand for a bagel."
"Sure if you want to play into every Jewish stereotype possible." Miranda teased, but Lisa was preoccupied with accepting her buttered bagel.
Lisa pushed open the door using her butt and they stepped back out into the sunshine. "A beautiful woman in one hand and a bagel in the other. I don't think it could possibly get any better."
Miranda shrugged, "you could say that you'd give in to temptation and let me pleasure you when we got back to your apartment. In my book, that would make it a lot better."
Lisa rolled her eyes good naturedly, "you have a one track mind, Miraleh," she blushed despite herself, "here, try a bite of this bagel, it's heaven."
Miranda stopped dead in her tracks, causing Lisa to falter. "I look like I eat bagels to you?"
"What kind of a Jew are you?" Lisa demanded rhetorically, "a Jew who doesn't eat bagels. That is sacrilege unto itself."
"A bagel is equal to five slices of bread." Miranda went on, "bread is almost pure carbohydrates."
"People need carbohydrates," Lisa rolled her eyes, "they're sugars and your body uses them to fuel your internal processes."
"I choose to get my carbohydrates from fruits and vegetables." Miranda said hautily.
"Bagels can be a good source of fibre." Lisa said, mouth full of bagel as she finished it off.
"That's very attractive, by the way." Miranda bumped Lisa with her hip, "you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth? No...." Miranda teased.
Lisa stopped and this time Miranda was caught by the arm and yanked back. Miranda laughed despite herself. Lisa cupped Miranda's cheek and kissed her softly.
♥
(told backwards, through a series of one shots)
Sacrilege
Inspiree par Coleen (musicinferno/aposse), make sure you read her wonderful fic Words & Noise!
Part "One:" Paramount
Pairing: Miranda Priestly/Lisa Metzger; established
Summary: After reading Words & Noise I decided to watch Prime again. Then the idea fore the first one was brought on by Lisa's line in Prime: "Religion is... paramount in people's lives." Then I decided to tell the story backwards...
Disclaimer: I don't own Prime. I don't own the Devil Wears Prada. I don't own Meryl Streep. (Too bad, eh?) No infringement is intended.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Meryl-on-Meryl pairing.
Three days earlier...
Miranda and Lisa stepped into the market. Miranda hadn't been to a plein air market since her mother took her when she was a child. She felt both out of place and a sense of coming home.
Lisa's fingers tickled Miranda's palm. Miranda blushed and bit back a smile before taking Lisa's hand. Lisa gave it a squeeze, "thanks for coming with me."
"You're thanking me for coming with you? I basically had to threaten you to let me come along." Miranda smirked.
"Eh, whatever. No matter what my original feelings were I'm glad you're here now, so shut-up." Lisa pouted and Miranda laughed.
Miranda let Lisa lead through the aisles of fresh food, Miranda had a personal shopper -- any one of her bereaved assistants -- and didn't plan to do any shopping for herself.
"Oh shit." Lisa looked across the market, seeing her own therapist, Rita, perusing the leafy vegetables. Memories of "stealthily" hiding from Dave and Rafi in the furniture store sprang to mind.
"What?" Miranda looked up from a pamphlet on how to get children to eat vegetables. "Are you okay?"
"It's my therapist! I didn't tell her about you," Lisa ducked behind a display of peaches. "Hide!"
"You didn't tell your therapist anything about me?" Miranda demanded, "we've been seeing each other for a month. You see your therapist twice a week, that's eight chances you had to mention me, eight hours of your talking about everything else under the sun and not one mention of me? At all?"
"Miranda! Please."
Miranda scoffed, "she has no context for me, there's no reason for me to hide." Miranda thought for a moment and continued with renewed vigor, "there's no reason for you to hide either! We aren't doing anything wrong."
"Yet." Lisa rolled her eyes.
Miranda grinned, "yet?"
Lisa blushed a full body blush, "don't read too much into that."
"Lisaleh, how could I not?" Miranda couldn't stop herself from grinning. "What's her name?"
"Whose?" Lisa asked, distractedly.
"The therapist."
"Her name's Rita." Lisa said peering over the mountain of fuzzy fruit. Rita was still in sight picking out a head of lettuce.
Miranda took a deep breath in order to muster up the wind power to project her voice all the way to leafy vegetables. Lisa looked up at her with mild concern. "Ri-" Miranda got halfway through the two syllable name before Lisa shoved a peach into her mouth.
Miranda took a bite out of the soft fruit, trying not to choke on it as she laughed. Lisa watched her scandalized. The peach vendor looked offended. Lisa pulled a dollar out of her pocket and handed it to him. "Keep the change."
Miranda laughed harder.
"Have mercy on an old woman, Miranda, shut-up." Lisa pleaded as she ducked behind the peaches again. This time Miranda ducked with her, careful to avoid any contact between the ground and anything but the bottoms of her shoes.
Miranda took another bite of the peach. "It's delicious."
Lisa smirked at her, smiling despite herself, "if you're trying to be sexy, try not to take huge bites of it. Eating out is not literal."
"Oh, I know." Miranda assured her.
Lisa blushed again and couldn't believe she'd been the instigator of that whole conversation. Mein Gott, she thought, that woman makes it difficult to resist temptation. Squatting behind a display of peaches, carefully perched to protect her Louboutins and Bill Blass pants from the dirty market ground. For me. She's out of her comfort zone for me.
Lisa was so distracted by her thoughts that she didn't even hear Rita approaching the fruits. "I'll take four peaches, Omar."
"Absolutely, Rita," the peach vendor answered, grabbing four peaches and putting them in a bag, Lisa ducked down lower. "When are you going to bring me more of your peach curry. You've got me hooked."
Rita laughed, the bag rustled as she held it up, "you'll have to wait at least as long as it takes me to make it."
Miranda took in a breath to speak and Lisa immediately covered her mouth, cupping the back of her head for good measure to avoid Miranda backing away from the hand. She felt Miranda's lips curl into a smile against her sensitive palm. Lisa felt like she was melting into Miranda, despite all her best efforts, she was drowning in Miranda.
Miranda was offering the life raft willingly, but still Lisa was drowning. She was still at a loss about whether or not she just wanted to drown or whether she'd allow Miranda to pull her from the water.
Finally Rita was out of sight and Lisa released Miranda. Miranda stood up, brushing herself off. "You're ridiculous," she accused with a twinkle of mischief in her eye. She took the last bite of her peach and handed the pit to a confused peach vendor.
Lisa's hand was over her heart, trying to quell her frazzled Jewish nerves. "You can be really insensitive." Lisa said without any bite.
Miranda shrugged, "no one has ever accused me of being sensitive." Miranda shook her head, "Lisa, she's your therapist, if there's anyone you could tell about an extra-marital affair it should be your therapist."
"It's not an extra-marital affair yet." Lisa corrected.
"There's that yet again. If you consider it inevitable why can't you just accept that you are having an extra-marital affair?"
"Because then that makes you real." Lisa sighed.
"And up until this point I've been a figment of your imagination? I'll have to tell my children. They'll be devastated that we don't really exist."
"You're incorrigible." Lisa laughed, "'I'm opening up to you and you're teasing me."
"I'm not your therapist, I'm your lover. I'm allowed to tease you." Miranda quipped.
This time, Lisa didn't take exception to her word usage. Even if they weren't sleeping together, she did know that they were lovers. They were silent for a while as they resumed their hand holding and Lisa picked out her meat and her produce.
Lisa walked closer to the fish. Lisa had learned to look straight at the carp and not to even bother with the more expensive -- delicious -- fish. However, having Miranda with her was enough of a variation in her routine to throw her off her game and her eyes landed on the scallops. Then the haddock. Then the salmon. Then the cod. Then the perch, the tuna and the swordfish. She bit her lip, feeling like she was going to pass out from the indecision.
Lisa bit her lip and then reached for the carp. Miranda yanked on her, pulling her hand away from her safety fish. "What?"
"Carp is disgusting."
"It's a staple." Lisa argued, trying to reach for it again, and again Miranda yanked her back. "Oh please." She rolled her eyes. "You weigh 100 pounds soaking wet, you think you're stronger than me?"
"That swordfish steak looks spectacular." Miranda ignored the insinuation about her strength.
"It's expensive." Lisa frowned.
"Oh, it's what? Fifteen dollars a pound?" Miranda smirked, "I've personally paid you four hundred dollars, I know you can afford it."
"Did your mother ever serve swordfish?" Lisa gave Miranda her very best mom look.
Miranda scoffed, "no. She served carp." Miranda crossed her arms across her chest, "but that only serves my point. Lisa, this is your chance to not become your mother. You are in no danger of dipping below the poverty line by buying food that you actually like."
Lisa stood conflicted. After a long internal deliberation she looked up at Miranda, and hesitantly asked, "what if I said I like carp?"
"I'd call you a liar and track down your therapist and tell her to add compulsive liar to your list of, what do you call them? Your nuances?"
"As a therapist, I don't want to get caught up in labeling myself with undiagnosed conditions."
"As a therapist, why can't can't you diagnose yourself?"
"I am the least unbiased person when it comes to my own mental health."
"Wait. You're trying to distract me. Buy the swordfish." Miranda snapped, extending her arm to point at the fish. Lisa opened her mouth to protest and Miranda cut her off sharply, "that's all."
"You have control issues." Lisa grumbled as she paid for the swordfish.
Miranda just grinned, taking one of Lisa's bags so she could hold her hand. On the walk back to Lisa's apartment building she spotted her favorite bakery and realized she needed a loaf of bread and bagels. Standing next to her dutifully, Miranda watched Lisa point out the bread she wanted and the bagels she wanted.
"Could you toast one of the bagels for me?" Lisa asked as she paid for the baked goods.
The man behind the counter nodded and put the bagel into a conveyer toaster. Miranda shook her head, "Lisa, you don't have a free hand for a bagel."
Lisa looked over at her, "oh ye of little faith." She said as she pushed the bags up her arm until they rest in the crook of her elbow. "There is always a hand for a bagel."
"Sure if you want to play into every Jewish stereotype possible." Miranda teased, but Lisa was preoccupied with accepting her buttered bagel.
Lisa pushed open the door using her butt and they stepped back out into the sunshine. "A beautiful woman in one hand and a bagel in the other. I don't think it could possibly get any better."
Miranda shrugged, "you could say that you'd give in to temptation and let me pleasure you when we got back to your apartment. In my book, that would make it a lot better."
Lisa rolled her eyes good naturedly, "you have a one track mind, Miraleh," she blushed despite herself, "here, try a bite of this bagel, it's heaven."
Miranda stopped dead in her tracks, causing Lisa to falter. "I look like I eat bagels to you?"
"What kind of a Jew are you?" Lisa demanded rhetorically, "a Jew who doesn't eat bagels. That is sacrilege unto itself."
"A bagel is equal to five slices of bread." Miranda went on, "bread is almost pure carbohydrates."
"People need carbohydrates," Lisa rolled her eyes, "they're sugars and your body uses them to fuel your internal processes."
"I choose to get my carbohydrates from fruits and vegetables." Miranda said hautily.
"Bagels can be a good source of fibre." Lisa said, mouth full of bagel as she finished it off.
"That's very attractive, by the way." Miranda bumped Lisa with her hip, "you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth? No...." Miranda teased.
Lisa stopped and this time Miranda was caught by the arm and yanked back. Miranda laughed despite herself. Lisa cupped Miranda's cheek and kissed her softly.
♥