Trying To Find Some, Somewhere by Elizah Jane, commentary by Fish Echo
Title: [ Trying To Find Some, Somewhere]
Author: elizah-jane
Fandom: Supernatural
Commentator: fish-echo
Genre: Slashy Crackfic, Humor
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1834 words (story), ~3600 words (story + commentary)
Spoilers: Through S4
Warnings: Hints of Castiel/Dean, Sam/Lucifer
Summary: Dean doesn't know quite what he expected from the Apocalypse, but this sure as hell wasn’t it.
Author Notes: I'm pretty sure I get to blame fish_echo for this one. /Yep, totally my fault!/ And I quote: Dean, your psyche is all messed up. Why don't you go turn into a kitten for a week, or a unicorn! (in response to this story /Which is a great post-Hell Dean character study. Go read it! Then come back here and read this for the happy crack!/) Sometimes I am RIDICULOUSLY SUSCEPTIBLE to the power of suggestion. JSYK!! Other than that, I will say that I am completely spoiler-free for S5 and thus the part of Lucifer for our purposes will be played by The Welling. That is all. /Personally, I think this is a hysterical casting choice./
Commenter Notes: /My comments shall be done in this style. I don't know how accessible this is, so if you have suggestions for improvement please let me know. And now, onto the fic!/
Trying To Find Some, Somewhere
/Much as I love this fic (and also that there are headers** for it!), I really don't understand the title. I'm guessing maybe it's referencing love, somehow? ETA: The author has explained the title (The title thing was really me amusing myself. It's from the lyrics to Little You and I by Jason Mraz. The reason it's funny is because on the album, his intro is, "I wrote this song for my cat.") and now the title amuses me rather than confusing me. :)
**I love headers so very much :) Headers are awesome for reccers (because it makes our jobs easier) and for readers (so we can find stories to read) and are just generally awesome :). And now onto your regularly scheduled commentary!/
Dean doesn't know quite what he expected from the Apocalypse, but this sure as hell wasn’t it. /Good introduction to the idea that this isn't going the standard doom and gloom route. I like my crack/humour to be grounded in canon &/ reality -- or to be at least internally consistent -- so I appreciate this./ So far it's been a whole lot of smack-talk and pettiness. Which is why he said, “I’m tired of this cat-and-mouse shit,” to Sam before he went to bed last night. /And now we have a bit of framing for what sort of not-doom-and-gloom it is. Answer: Glorious kitty-transformation fic!/
So when he wakes up fully covered by the sheet and blanket, he has a sinking feeling that he knows what’s happened before he hops up onto the bathroom counter to check in the mirror. /I like that in this fic he's got a sense of his body before checking the mirror. It seems like in a lot of animal transformation fics the tranformee doesn't have a clue until s/he's done something like fall out of bed. Which is quite humourous to the reader, but to me seems somewhat out of character for Dean because he's so physical./ The rain of toads he can handle. Hell, he's pretty sure at this point he'd be glad for a reign of toads. /*glee* Oh I do love bad (good!) puns! Also, how much do I love that there evidently was a rain of toads earlier? Answer: lots./ But this is really beyond the pale.
He sits there for awhile, studying his reflection. Short, sleek black fur and vivid green eyes, white whiskers that stand out in contrast to his fur. He brings his paw up in front of him, starts licking it automatically. /Kitty!/ At least he has claws. He stops once he realizes what he's doing and sighs. This is such bullshit.
There's one thing he knows for sure about this whole Apocalypse business-Lucifer's a dick. /Which is fitting, because the author has declared Lucifer to be played by Welling, who plays (played? I'm not real up on what's currently showing) Superman on Smallville, and as we all know [Superman is a dick]. /
***
As it turns out, Sam is also a dick. /OTP: Sammy/Lucy. Or perhaps Sam is just being classic little-brother here. Or possibly both! I leave the interpretation up to the reader. / He laughs like he's never going to stop when Dean wakes him up and he realizes what’s happened. Fortunately, Dean remembers his claws and scratches the shit out of Sam’s chest. /And Dean is being classic older-brother./ For funsies. /Ahahhaaa, I love this! Not only does using a short sentence at the end of the paragraph intensify it, but I just love the phrase. And it seems like believable inner-voice Dean diction to me./
"Ow! Jesus, Dean!" Sam shoves him off and Dean lands in an undignified heap on the bed.
He sits up and starts grooming his paw automatically like he hasn't a care in the world. /FYI, cats of the world: We know this move, you're not fooling anyone./ Judging by Sam's amusement, Dean figures that this is just the latest in Lucifer's courtship of Sam Winchester. As if Sam would throw Dean over for the Prince of Darkness. /*pets Dean*/
"Okay, I'm sorry I laughed," Sam says. He doesn't sound sorry.
Dean turns his back on him and starts grooming the tip of his tail.
"I guess we should maybe talk to Cas?"
"You think?" Dean says. "Also, I'm hungry. Fetch me some tuna, bitch." Only it comes out, "Rrow? Rrow rrow rrow" and then a weird gurgling sound.
At least he has a manly meow. /Oh, Dean :) /
"Yeah." Sam draws out the word. "You don't expect me to understand that, do you?" /I love that Sam is enjoying this./
Dean stands up and stretches, arching his back and flexing his claws as if to say, "I will claw your face off. Just try me." Perhaps overly dramatic, but Sam seems to get the point.
"We'll talk to Cas."
***
"Cas!" Dean jumps down off the bed as soon as Castiel appears. "Lucifer turned me into a cat."
"Yes, I see that." /For funsies, his angel can understand him when he speaks! This makes for amusing times ahead./ Castiel looks down at him and Dean realizes he's weaving in between Castiel's legs, rubbing against him as he goes. /Ooopsies, Dean. Your subconscious is not being terribly subtle here. (Even if it takes your conscious a while to figure things out. And that's okay! Consciousnesses are notoriously slow about these things! (So there's realism in my crack. Remember how I mentioned earlier that I love it when that happens? Yeah, I really do love it.) ) /
"Uh. Sorry." Dean sits down and looks up. Castiel is very tall from this perspective. "Wait. Did you understand me? Am I talking?" He turns back to glare at Sam.
"I can understand you, yes. Your brother cannot."
"Fat lot of good you are," Dean meows at Sam. "I suppose it'd be too much to expect that your psychic powers would be useful in any way." /*snerk*/ He turns back to Castiel. "Tell him to go get me tuna while the grown-ups talk."
Castiel looks at Sam and says, "Your brother requests something to eat. Some fish, perhaps?"
"Yeah, okay." Sam goes in search of Dean's keys.
"And bottled water. Maybe some catnip. I'm curious," Dean adds when Castiel gives him a look.
"No," Castiel says instead of passing on the request. /I love the way Cas acts as gatekeeper to communication. In general I would disapprove of censoring someone when you are the only one who can understand them, but this manages to be funny not creepy about it. Plus, as Sam shows later, he has a basic grasp of Dean and thus I'm sure he's getting the gist anyways, so it's not so much that Cas is forbidding Dean to talk to Sam as it is that he's occasionally having conversations solely with Dean. Or something./
Dean's tail twitches. "No?"
"Intoxicants would not help the situation."
"I happen to think that they would help the situation a great deal." /I am sort of voting with Dean on this one./
"No," Castiel says again.
From his spot at the door, keys in hand, Sam watches the argument with an amused look on his face. /Sam is sweet!/ Admittedly, it must be slightly ridiculous to watch Castiel argue with a cat /Yes, this is a highly amusing visual!/, but still. Dean kind of wants to puke in Sam's shoe, just on principle. /Sorry Dean, my sympathy is with Sam on this one./
"Fine. Whatever. But chop chop. Kitty's hungry." Dean has the overwhelming urge to start rubbing against Castiel again, which he suspects is just due to the overwhelming relief he feels that someone is here who can understand him. It's still more than a little disconcerting. He feels twitchy, like he wants to jump on something. So he hops up onto the bed again.
"He requests water as well," Castiel says as Sam heads for the door. Once he's gone, Castiel tilts his head and looks down at him. "You would like to sit on my lap."
By the time Dean realizes that it's true, he has already started purring. "I really would," he admits. /I'm not a Cas/Dean shipper-- actually, I'm rather bothered by Cas/anyone because of the part where he's an angel-- but I'm willing to suspend that for crack fics. And back to the point of this passage-- I think Dean's realisation of his attraction to Cas is done very well in this fic-- there's a nice slow reveal (which we are currently in the middle of). I think it helps that the author isn't a Dean/Cas shipper either, because rather than starting *boom* with the assumption of attraction she shows it. /
Castiel obligingly sits down and Dean is crawling into his lap before he's fully seated. Curls up and wraps his tail around his body as Castiel starts petting his head. /In my interpretation of this fic, I see Cas as being cognisant of his attraction to and interest in Dean from before the fic starts. The little moments like this one seem to support it-- rather than being freaked out or questioning kitty!Dean's closeness, he just goes with it. Part of it could be the angel-impassiveness he has going on, but I think at least some of it is that Dean's actions are aligning with his own desires, and as long as accepting those actions does Dean no harm he may as well take the closeness that Dean doesn't normally offer./ The purring gets louder. When he moves his hand to stroke down Dean's back, it sounds like a helicopter in Dean's head and he just. Can't. Stop. /And anyone who's ever had a cat knows that this means that Dean is happy. Yay! Dean!kitten is having pysche-repairing cuddling!/
He's pretty sure he'll be embarrassed about it later, but for now he's far too content and after a prolonged session of Castiel scratching under his chin, Dean settles his head down, unable to keep his eyes open.
"We shall wait for Sam to return to discuss our plans," Castiel says as he strokes Dean's fur. /Oh, Cas!/
If it's possible, Dean's purrs get louder yet.
***
Dean doesn't remember falling asleep, but he wakes up to the sound of the door closing and Sam saying, "I can come back later..." like the smartass he is. /I love that Sam knows that there's something there and that he chooses to respond with teasing./
"Please tell Sam to kindly suck it," Dean says to Castiel as he stands and stretches.
"That will not be necessary," Castiel says instead. /Cas is awesome for having that comment be a suitable reply to what both Dean and Sam said./
Sam looks at Dean and laughs. "Yeah, that's not what he said." /I love when the boys communicate without words./ He throws a bag on the table and starts pulling out cans. "I got tuna and salmon. And Ty Nant /I think this is the water bottle brand that Lex Luthor drank in Smallville? So I love this little tiny shot-out to that show, especially since we've got Superman here as Lucifer./, your majesty."
Dean hops up onto the table and studies the cans. He bends down and delicately licks the lid of one and then looks up at Sam expectantly.
"Aw, shit. I didn't get a can-opener." /I love the look on Sam's face at this (yes, it's in my head, but whatevs). His face just *falls*. I actually can buy Sam forgetting a can opener on his grocery store quest for fish for his now-a-cat older brother but what really makes me chortle is that evidently he also forgot that he's got a can opener on his knife. I'm just assuming that they each have Swiss Army knives that they've modified to have useful things for the hunt (Now with a flint! For ease of burning dead bodies!). I mean, I take a knife like that when I go walking so I can open tinned meat, so they've got to *at least* have an opener! But then again, the boys are pretty but not always so smart (fingerprints, anyone?). Moving right along, Cas'll solve all problems without even resorting to calling anyone a bitch or a jerk./
Before the actual bickering can start, Castiel steps up and touches the lid of the tuna can, making it disappear.
"Neat trick," Dean says. Then he starts eating because it smells really good. /Mmmmm, tinned fish. I love fish./
Castiel is petting him again and while it should be annoying, Dean finds himself arching into the touch. He also discovers that he can purr and eat at the same time. /Congrats, Dean! You are a cat of many talents! Also, you are so crushing on Cas and you don't even know it yet. *pets Dean*/
It's a day of revelations.
***
"We must go to L.A.," Castiel says. "It is where Lucifer is staying."
Sam raises his eyebrows. "L.A.? Isn't that a little, I dunno. Cliché?"
"I'm sure he appreciates the irony," Dean says.
"No, Sam's right. He thinks it's a passé." Castiel says. "It just has the most potential converts. He enjoys the hipsters." /Lol./
Dean didn't realize that Castiel knew what a hipster was. /In my mind, Castiel *doesn't* know what a hipster is. He just knows that they are in L.A. and that they're why Lucifer is there./ "So, we're just gonna waltz into Lucifer's lair and demand that he change me back?"
"Yes."
As far as plans went, it was pretty straight forward.
/See, every time I read that line, I keep expecting it to end 'sucked' rather than 'straight forward'. I think it might be one of my fav lines in the whole story-- I love the way it sets you up to think one thing and then switches it around on you. (Which is why I put my comment in a different paragraph-- I wanted the effect to be preserved in the commentary.) /
"I suspect that you are correct, Dean, in thinking that this is an overture toward Sam."
"Wait, what?" Sam looks confused. "Lucifer is hitting on my by turning Dean into a cat?" /Rotf. Sam hadn't figured it out before this! When I first read this story I didn't know how Sam felt about the 'hints of Sam/Lucifer', which made the next scene (with Lucifer) more interesting./
"He has an odd sense of humor."
"Also, he's a dick," Dean feels the need to add.
"There is that," Castiel agrees. /I love the repetition that Lucifer is a dick. Repeat something often enough and it becomes both true and funny!/
***
They don't so much waltz into Lucifer's lair (which happens to be in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland /Which means I'm visualising Lucifer as played by Tom Welling (who played Superman) dressed up like Captain Jack Sparrow./ ) as beam in via Castiel's angel mojo. Castiel with Dean in his arms and Sam beside them looking more annoyed than anything else.
Lucifer takes one look at them and starts laughing. Hard. /Because Lucifer is a dick./
"Castiel," he says when he can talk again. "You're not supposed to feed the strays. You'll never get rid of them." Then he starts laughing again.
Sam's lips twitch like he's trying not to join in the hilarity. /This is because Sam's a bit of a dick. Or at least he shares Lucifer's sense of humour./
"I fucking hate you all," Dean says. His tail is swishing back and forth in agitation.
Then Castiel rubs under his chin and Dean momentarily forgets his annoyance in favor of stretching his neck for more scratches. /Awww, Dean. /
"You look like Dr. Evil." Lucifer cocks his head and smiles. "You know, Dean, I bet Castiel would still pet you like that as a human." /Cas's crush on Dean is obvious enough that Lucifer can recognise it :) . Of course, Lucy and Cas quite possibly knew each other back before the Fall, so that would probably help him with reading Cas./
"Oh, come on!" Sam groans and covers his eyes. "Could we please not go there? God! I'm gonna be bleaching my brain for a week." /Poor Sam! With that one comment Lucifer just lost some ground on his courting. Poor Lucifer. /
Dean ignores Sam's outburst in favor of looking up at Castiel.
Castiel looks at him for a moment, then looks away. "He is not wrong."
Oh, Dean thinks.
"Christ," Sam says.
/Great interactions there-- saying so much with so little. /
Lucifer is clutching his sides as he laughs. After what seems like forever, he calms down enough to slide up next to Sam, tilt his head and cast him a coy look from under his bangs. "How's things, Sam?"
Sam blushes and honest-to-god scuffs his toe on the ground as he says, "Alright."
If he had a ponytail, he'd be twirling it.
/This bit right here ^ is my very favourite image in the whole damn fic. I love it so much. It not only sells me on Sam/Lucifer but makes me want loads more in this universe. With a decent amount of that 'loads' to be S/L. /
"Do you think that maybe you could turn me back into a person before you start seducing my little brother over to the dark side?" Dean asks.
"Whatever." Lucifer waves a hand in their direction. He has backed Sam up against a rock pillar thing and is leaning in, his other hand braced by Sam's head. /And now that Lucifer's got Sam's attention he really doesn't care much more about the Dean-kitten problem. Which is utterly in character (as it's been established that Lucifer changed Dean in order to flirt with Sam) and also convenient to the plot. Yet it doesn't feel like a cop-out on the author's part. So props to the author for not going totally the deus ex machina route (Which, let's face it, I really have no problem with. Because I'm easy like that. But I do appreciate it when an author goes above and beyond.) /
Dean suddenly finds himself a) human, b) nude and c) still in Castiel's arms. /Happy unbirthday, Cas! :P/
Awkward.
"Can I be blind now?" Sam asks. /I love the Sam&Dean interactions in this story-- they are such brothers./
"Um, can I just..." Dean says and Castiel sets him down. Offers him his coat, because he's a gentlemen. /And we see here Cas caring for Dean. I note this because Cas seems generally oblivious to things like social constructions, so I think he's picking up on Dean's actual distress here rather than simply the 'offer the naked guy clothes' aspect which a human might be reacting to./ "Thanks."
"I can't look. I might never stop laughing," Lucifer stage-whispers. "Is it as hilarious as I think it is?" /Lucy, you are a dick! But I'm half-convinced that the other part of your turning-Dean-into-a-kitten (other than the obvious courting-Sam part) was to get your man Cas hooked up with Dean, so you might be okay./
"Yeah, well, fun as this has been. C'mon, Sammy. Time to go." /Good writing here-- the dialogue is grammatically incorrect but it's completely believable as dialogue. I'm a big fan of realistic-sounding dialogue, but whenever I write I have to resist the urge to make it be proper English. So I always admire it when others succeed at that./ Dean says this with as much authority as he can muster while dressed like a flasher.
"Uh, yeah. You guys go ahead." Sam is biting his lip against laughter as Lucifer whispers in his ear. "I'll catch up with you." /I really do love the Sam/Lucifer interactions./
Dean is pretty sure he hears Lucifer say "hipsters". /Ahahhaaa, Lucifer is whispering sweet nothings into Sam's ear./
On the one hand, Dean can't really leave his baby brother in the thrall of the Prince of Darkness. On the other hand, "Fuck this noise. /I love this phrase. I also love Dean's concession to his brother flirting. Remember, the key to giving orders is to never give an order which you know will be disobeyed. Plus, I don't think Lucy is that bad in this 'verse. So clearly it isn't really a problem leaving Sam alone with him.... (Oy vey, I'm such a Sam/Lucifer OTPer in this 'verse it's crazy.) / Let's go, Cas."
***
They get back to the motel and things go from awkward to, well, more awkward.
"So, uh," Dean says brilliantly.
Castiel tilts his head and studies Dean. Then he says, "You still want to sit in my lap."
Dean sighs. "God help me, I really do." /Wonderful little scene, isn't it? To my great surprise, I do buy the Dean/Cas in this story./
/And that's the end! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did! Thank you, elizah-jane!/
Author: elizah-jane
Fandom: Supernatural
Commentator: fish-echo
Genre: Slashy Crackfic, Humor
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1834 words (story), ~3600 words (story + commentary)
Spoilers: Through S4
Warnings: Hints of Castiel/Dean, Sam/Lucifer
Summary: Dean doesn't know quite what he expected from the Apocalypse, but this sure as hell wasn’t it.
Author Notes: I'm pretty sure I get to blame fish_echo for this one. /Yep, totally my fault!/ And I quote: Dean, your psyche is all messed up. Why don't you go turn into a kitten for a week, or a unicorn! (in response to this story /Which is a great post-Hell Dean character study. Go read it! Then come back here and read this for the happy crack!/) Sometimes I am RIDICULOUSLY SUSCEPTIBLE to the power of suggestion. JSYK!! Other than that, I will say that I am completely spoiler-free for S5 and thus the part of Lucifer for our purposes will be played by The Welling. That is all. /Personally, I think this is a hysterical casting choice./
Commenter Notes: /My comments shall be done in this style. I don't know how accessible this is, so if you have suggestions for improvement please let me know. And now, onto the fic!/
Trying To Find Some, Somewhere
/Much as I love this fic (and also that there are headers** for it!), I really don't understand the title. I'm guessing maybe it's referencing love, somehow? ETA: The author has explained the title (The title thing was really me amusing myself. It's from the lyrics to Little You and I by Jason Mraz. The reason it's funny is because on the album, his intro is, "I wrote this song for my cat.") and now the title amuses me rather than confusing me. :)
**I love headers so very much :) Headers are awesome for reccers (because it makes our jobs easier) and for readers (so we can find stories to read) and are just generally awesome :). And now onto your regularly scheduled commentary!/
Dean doesn't know quite what he expected from the Apocalypse, but this sure as hell wasn’t it. /Good introduction to the idea that this isn't going the standard doom and gloom route. I like my crack/humour to be grounded in canon &/ reality -- or to be at least internally consistent -- so I appreciate this./ So far it's been a whole lot of smack-talk and pettiness. Which is why he said, “I’m tired of this cat-and-mouse shit,” to Sam before he went to bed last night. /And now we have a bit of framing for what sort of not-doom-and-gloom it is. Answer: Glorious kitty-transformation fic!/
So when he wakes up fully covered by the sheet and blanket, he has a sinking feeling that he knows what’s happened before he hops up onto the bathroom counter to check in the mirror. /I like that in this fic he's got a sense of his body before checking the mirror. It seems like in a lot of animal transformation fics the tranformee doesn't have a clue until s/he's done something like fall out of bed. Which is quite humourous to the reader, but to me seems somewhat out of character for Dean because he's so physical./ The rain of toads he can handle. Hell, he's pretty sure at this point he'd be glad for a reign of toads. /*glee* Oh I do love bad (good!) puns! Also, how much do I love that there evidently was a rain of toads earlier? Answer: lots./ But this is really beyond the pale.
He sits there for awhile, studying his reflection. Short, sleek black fur and vivid green eyes, white whiskers that stand out in contrast to his fur. He brings his paw up in front of him, starts licking it automatically. /Kitty!/ At least he has claws. He stops once he realizes what he's doing and sighs. This is such bullshit.
There's one thing he knows for sure about this whole Apocalypse business-Lucifer's a dick. /Which is fitting, because the author has declared Lucifer to be played by Welling, who plays (played? I'm not real up on what's currently showing) Superman on Smallville, and as we all know [Superman is a dick]. /
***
As it turns out, Sam is also a dick. /OTP: Sammy/Lucy. Or perhaps Sam is just being classic little-brother here. Or possibly both! I leave the interpretation up to the reader. / He laughs like he's never going to stop when Dean wakes him up and he realizes what’s happened. Fortunately, Dean remembers his claws and scratches the shit out of Sam’s chest. /And Dean is being classic older-brother./ For funsies. /Ahahhaaa, I love this! Not only does using a short sentence at the end of the paragraph intensify it, but I just love the phrase. And it seems like believable inner-voice Dean diction to me./
"Ow! Jesus, Dean!" Sam shoves him off and Dean lands in an undignified heap on the bed.
He sits up and starts grooming his paw automatically like he hasn't a care in the world. /FYI, cats of the world: We know this move, you're not fooling anyone./ Judging by Sam's amusement, Dean figures that this is just the latest in Lucifer's courtship of Sam Winchester. As if Sam would throw Dean over for the Prince of Darkness. /*pets Dean*/
"Okay, I'm sorry I laughed," Sam says. He doesn't sound sorry.
Dean turns his back on him and starts grooming the tip of his tail.
"I guess we should maybe talk to Cas?"
"You think?" Dean says. "Also, I'm hungry. Fetch me some tuna, bitch." Only it comes out, "Rrow? Rrow rrow rrow" and then a weird gurgling sound.
At least he has a manly meow. /Oh, Dean :) /
"Yeah." Sam draws out the word. "You don't expect me to understand that, do you?" /I love that Sam is enjoying this./
Dean stands up and stretches, arching his back and flexing his claws as if to say, "I will claw your face off. Just try me." Perhaps overly dramatic, but Sam seems to get the point.
"We'll talk to Cas."
***
"Cas!" Dean jumps down off the bed as soon as Castiel appears. "Lucifer turned me into a cat."
"Yes, I see that." /For funsies, his angel can understand him when he speaks! This makes for amusing times ahead./ Castiel looks down at him and Dean realizes he's weaving in between Castiel's legs, rubbing against him as he goes. /Ooopsies, Dean. Your subconscious is not being terribly subtle here. (Even if it takes your conscious a while to figure things out. And that's okay! Consciousnesses are notoriously slow about these things! (So there's realism in my crack. Remember how I mentioned earlier that I love it when that happens? Yeah, I really do love it.) ) /
"Uh. Sorry." Dean sits down and looks up. Castiel is very tall from this perspective. "Wait. Did you understand me? Am I talking?" He turns back to glare at Sam.
"I can understand you, yes. Your brother cannot."
"Fat lot of good you are," Dean meows at Sam. "I suppose it'd be too much to expect that your psychic powers would be useful in any way." /*snerk*/ He turns back to Castiel. "Tell him to go get me tuna while the grown-ups talk."
Castiel looks at Sam and says, "Your brother requests something to eat. Some fish, perhaps?"
"Yeah, okay." Sam goes in search of Dean's keys.
"And bottled water. Maybe some catnip. I'm curious," Dean adds when Castiel gives him a look.
"No," Castiel says instead of passing on the request. /I love the way Cas acts as gatekeeper to communication. In general I would disapprove of censoring someone when you are the only one who can understand them, but this manages to be funny not creepy about it. Plus, as Sam shows later, he has a basic grasp of Dean and thus I'm sure he's getting the gist anyways, so it's not so much that Cas is forbidding Dean to talk to Sam as it is that he's occasionally having conversations solely with Dean. Or something./
Dean's tail twitches. "No?"
"Intoxicants would not help the situation."
"I happen to think that they would help the situation a great deal." /I am sort of voting with Dean on this one./
"No," Castiel says again.
From his spot at the door, keys in hand, Sam watches the argument with an amused look on his face. /Sam is sweet!/ Admittedly, it must be slightly ridiculous to watch Castiel argue with a cat /Yes, this is a highly amusing visual!/, but still. Dean kind of wants to puke in Sam's shoe, just on principle. /Sorry Dean, my sympathy is with Sam on this one./
"Fine. Whatever. But chop chop. Kitty's hungry." Dean has the overwhelming urge to start rubbing against Castiel again, which he suspects is just due to the overwhelming relief he feels that someone is here who can understand him. It's still more than a little disconcerting. He feels twitchy, like he wants to jump on something. So he hops up onto the bed again.
"He requests water as well," Castiel says as Sam heads for the door. Once he's gone, Castiel tilts his head and looks down at him. "You would like to sit on my lap."
By the time Dean realizes that it's true, he has already started purring. "I really would," he admits. /I'm not a Cas/Dean shipper-- actually, I'm rather bothered by Cas/anyone because of the part where he's an angel-- but I'm willing to suspend that for crack fics. And back to the point of this passage-- I think Dean's realisation of his attraction to Cas is done very well in this fic-- there's a nice slow reveal (which we are currently in the middle of). I think it helps that the author isn't a Dean/Cas shipper either, because rather than starting *boom* with the assumption of attraction she shows it. /
Castiel obligingly sits down and Dean is crawling into his lap before he's fully seated. Curls up and wraps his tail around his body as Castiel starts petting his head. /In my interpretation of this fic, I see Cas as being cognisant of his attraction to and interest in Dean from before the fic starts. The little moments like this one seem to support it-- rather than being freaked out or questioning kitty!Dean's closeness, he just goes with it. Part of it could be the angel-impassiveness he has going on, but I think at least some of it is that Dean's actions are aligning with his own desires, and as long as accepting those actions does Dean no harm he may as well take the closeness that Dean doesn't normally offer./ The purring gets louder. When he moves his hand to stroke down Dean's back, it sounds like a helicopter in Dean's head and he just. Can't. Stop. /And anyone who's ever had a cat knows that this means that Dean is happy. Yay! Dean!kitten is having pysche-repairing cuddling!/
He's pretty sure he'll be embarrassed about it later, but for now he's far too content and after a prolonged session of Castiel scratching under his chin, Dean settles his head down, unable to keep his eyes open.
"We shall wait for Sam to return to discuss our plans," Castiel says as he strokes Dean's fur. /Oh, Cas!/
If it's possible, Dean's purrs get louder yet.
***
Dean doesn't remember falling asleep, but he wakes up to the sound of the door closing and Sam saying, "I can come back later..." like the smartass he is. /I love that Sam knows that there's something there and that he chooses to respond with teasing./
"Please tell Sam to kindly suck it," Dean says to Castiel as he stands and stretches.
"That will not be necessary," Castiel says instead. /Cas is awesome for having that comment be a suitable reply to what both Dean and Sam said./
Sam looks at Dean and laughs. "Yeah, that's not what he said." /I love when the boys communicate without words./ He throws a bag on the table and starts pulling out cans. "I got tuna and salmon. And Ty Nant /I think this is the water bottle brand that Lex Luthor drank in Smallville? So I love this little tiny shot-out to that show, especially since we've got Superman here as Lucifer./, your majesty."
Dean hops up onto the table and studies the cans. He bends down and delicately licks the lid of one and then looks up at Sam expectantly.
"Aw, shit. I didn't get a can-opener." /I love the look on Sam's face at this (yes, it's in my head, but whatevs). His face just *falls*. I actually can buy Sam forgetting a can opener on his grocery store quest for fish for his now-a-cat older brother but what really makes me chortle is that evidently he also forgot that he's got a can opener on his knife. I'm just assuming that they each have Swiss Army knives that they've modified to have useful things for the hunt (Now with a flint! For ease of burning dead bodies!). I mean, I take a knife like that when I go walking so I can open tinned meat, so they've got to *at least* have an opener! But then again, the boys are pretty but not always so smart (fingerprints, anyone?). Moving right along, Cas'll solve all problems without even resorting to calling anyone a bitch or a jerk./
Before the actual bickering can start, Castiel steps up and touches the lid of the tuna can, making it disappear.
"Neat trick," Dean says. Then he starts eating because it smells really good. /Mmmmm, tinned fish. I love fish./
Castiel is petting him again and while it should be annoying, Dean finds himself arching into the touch. He also discovers that he can purr and eat at the same time. /Congrats, Dean! You are a cat of many talents! Also, you are so crushing on Cas and you don't even know it yet. *pets Dean*/
It's a day of revelations.
***
"We must go to L.A.," Castiel says. "It is where Lucifer is staying."
Sam raises his eyebrows. "L.A.? Isn't that a little, I dunno. Cliché?"
"I'm sure he appreciates the irony," Dean says.
"No, Sam's right. He thinks it's a passé." Castiel says. "It just has the most potential converts. He enjoys the hipsters." /Lol./
Dean didn't realize that Castiel knew what a hipster was. /In my mind, Castiel *doesn't* know what a hipster is. He just knows that they are in L.A. and that they're why Lucifer is there./ "So, we're just gonna waltz into Lucifer's lair and demand that he change me back?"
"Yes."
As far as plans went, it was pretty straight forward.
/See, every time I read that line, I keep expecting it to end 'sucked' rather than 'straight forward'. I think it might be one of my fav lines in the whole story-- I love the way it sets you up to think one thing and then switches it around on you. (Which is why I put my comment in a different paragraph-- I wanted the effect to be preserved in the commentary.) /
"I suspect that you are correct, Dean, in thinking that this is an overture toward Sam."
"Wait, what?" Sam looks confused. "Lucifer is hitting on my by turning Dean into a cat?" /Rotf. Sam hadn't figured it out before this! When I first read this story I didn't know how Sam felt about the 'hints of Sam/Lucifer', which made the next scene (with Lucifer) more interesting./
"He has an odd sense of humor."
"Also, he's a dick," Dean feels the need to add.
"There is that," Castiel agrees. /I love the repetition that Lucifer is a dick. Repeat something often enough and it becomes both true and funny!/
***
They don't so much waltz into Lucifer's lair (which happens to be in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland /Which means I'm visualising Lucifer as played by Tom Welling (who played Superman) dressed up like Captain Jack Sparrow./ ) as beam in via Castiel's angel mojo. Castiel with Dean in his arms and Sam beside them looking more annoyed than anything else.
Lucifer takes one look at them and starts laughing. Hard. /Because Lucifer is a dick./
"Castiel," he says when he can talk again. "You're not supposed to feed the strays. You'll never get rid of them." Then he starts laughing again.
Sam's lips twitch like he's trying not to join in the hilarity. /This is because Sam's a bit of a dick. Or at least he shares Lucifer's sense of humour./
"I fucking hate you all," Dean says. His tail is swishing back and forth in agitation.
Then Castiel rubs under his chin and Dean momentarily forgets his annoyance in favor of stretching his neck for more scratches. /Awww, Dean. /
"You look like Dr. Evil." Lucifer cocks his head and smiles. "You know, Dean, I bet Castiel would still pet you like that as a human." /Cas's crush on Dean is obvious enough that Lucifer can recognise it :) . Of course, Lucy and Cas quite possibly knew each other back before the Fall, so that would probably help him with reading Cas./
"Oh, come on!" Sam groans and covers his eyes. "Could we please not go there? God! I'm gonna be bleaching my brain for a week." /Poor Sam! With that one comment Lucifer just lost some ground on his courting. Poor Lucifer. /
Dean ignores Sam's outburst in favor of looking up at Castiel.
Castiel looks at him for a moment, then looks away. "He is not wrong."
Oh, Dean thinks.
"Christ," Sam says.
/Great interactions there-- saying so much with so little. /
Lucifer is clutching his sides as he laughs. After what seems like forever, he calms down enough to slide up next to Sam, tilt his head and cast him a coy look from under his bangs. "How's things, Sam?"
Sam blushes and honest-to-god scuffs his toe on the ground as he says, "Alright."
If he had a ponytail, he'd be twirling it.
/This bit right here ^ is my very favourite image in the whole damn fic. I love it so much. It not only sells me on Sam/Lucifer but makes me want loads more in this universe. With a decent amount of that 'loads' to be S/L. /
"Do you think that maybe you could turn me back into a person before you start seducing my little brother over to the dark side?" Dean asks.
"Whatever." Lucifer waves a hand in their direction. He has backed Sam up against a rock pillar thing and is leaning in, his other hand braced by Sam's head. /And now that Lucifer's got Sam's attention he really doesn't care much more about the Dean-kitten problem. Which is utterly in character (as it's been established that Lucifer changed Dean in order to flirt with Sam) and also convenient to the plot. Yet it doesn't feel like a cop-out on the author's part. So props to the author for not going totally the deus ex machina route (Which, let's face it, I really have no problem with. Because I'm easy like that. But I do appreciate it when an author goes above and beyond.) /
Dean suddenly finds himself a) human, b) nude and c) still in Castiel's arms. /Happy unbirthday, Cas! :P/
Awkward.
"Can I be blind now?" Sam asks. /I love the Sam&Dean interactions in this story-- they are such brothers./
"Um, can I just..." Dean says and Castiel sets him down. Offers him his coat, because he's a gentlemen. /And we see here Cas caring for Dean. I note this because Cas seems generally oblivious to things like social constructions, so I think he's picking up on Dean's actual distress here rather than simply the 'offer the naked guy clothes' aspect which a human might be reacting to./ "Thanks."
"I can't look. I might never stop laughing," Lucifer stage-whispers. "Is it as hilarious as I think it is?" /Lucy, you are a dick! But I'm half-convinced that the other part of your turning-Dean-into-a-kitten (other than the obvious courting-Sam part) was to get your man Cas hooked up with Dean, so you might be okay./
"Yeah, well, fun as this has been. C'mon, Sammy. Time to go." /Good writing here-- the dialogue is grammatically incorrect but it's completely believable as dialogue. I'm a big fan of realistic-sounding dialogue, but whenever I write I have to resist the urge to make it be proper English. So I always admire it when others succeed at that./ Dean says this with as much authority as he can muster while dressed like a flasher.
"Uh, yeah. You guys go ahead." Sam is biting his lip against laughter as Lucifer whispers in his ear. "I'll catch up with you." /I really do love the Sam/Lucifer interactions./
Dean is pretty sure he hears Lucifer say "hipsters". /Ahahhaaa, Lucifer is whispering sweet nothings into Sam's ear./
On the one hand, Dean can't really leave his baby brother in the thrall of the Prince of Darkness. On the other hand, "Fuck this noise. /I love this phrase. I also love Dean's concession to his brother flirting. Remember, the key to giving orders is to never give an order which you know will be disobeyed. Plus, I don't think Lucy is that bad in this 'verse. So clearly it isn't really a problem leaving Sam alone with him.... (Oy vey, I'm such a Sam/Lucifer OTPer in this 'verse it's crazy.) / Let's go, Cas."
***
They get back to the motel and things go from awkward to, well, more awkward.
"So, uh," Dean says brilliantly.
Castiel tilts his head and studies Dean. Then he says, "You still want to sit in my lap."
Dean sighs. "God help me, I really do." /Wonderful little scene, isn't it? To my great surprise, I do buy the Dean/Cas in this story./
/And that's the end! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did! Thank you, elizah-jane!/