#9 'Communicating' for diabolicalfiend
Title: Communicating
For: diabolicalfiend. Hope you enjoy it!
Prompt: A fic with Stella and Dief and the line: 'he's either going to help or eat me. Great.'
Characters: Stella, Dief, Fraser
Word Count: 735
Rating: PG
It was late on Friday evening and, for reasons that don’t need explaining at this juncture, ASA Stella Vecchio had been locked into Harry Callahan’s accountancy office with Diefenbaker.
“It’s perfectly simple,” Dief said. “The door is locked. The key has been removed. The window is similarly locked, and furthermore, we are five stories from the ground. That this was intentional seems beyond question, although the reasons for it elude me. That we are to be left to perish seems unlikely; in the worst case we will be released on Monday morning, when the workers return.”
He settled comfortably into a squishy armchair by the water cooler, and looked at Stella. Unsurprisingly, she failed to respond and instead carried on trying to unscrew the door handle with her nail file while not letting him out of her sight.
“It seems improbable in the extreme that your cosmetic accessories will be sufficient to gain egress via what is evidently a high-security office door. And if you don’t pay attention to what you’re doing...”
“Dammit!” The file snapped in Stella’s hand, and the sharp tang of blood was released into the office air.
“There! Now you have sustained an entirely unnecessary injury, damaged your property, and made no progress whatsoever. You should follow my example, and reserve your strength for when it is required. I intend to avail myself of the entertainment facilities at hand.”
He leaned heavily on the remote control.
“THANK GOD YOU’RE HERE, SURPRISED-BY-EVERYTHING BOY!” bellowed a television, mounted high on the office wall.
“What the...!” Stella jumped to her feet, and stared wildly around the room, before catching sight of the remote.
“Oh, it was you, was it? I might have known.”
“THE WORLD SUPPLY OF PIZZA HAS RUN OUT!” exclaimed a bald man, looking appropriately distressed.
Stella edged over, and tried to reach the remote without actually coming within arm’s length.
“Er, good boy,” she muttered, unconvincingly. “He’s a good boy. Yes he is. You just watch the funny men.” She steeled herself to move close enough to grab the remote and mute the TV, and retreated to a corner.
“There’s really no need to speak to me like a child. And if you stand over there, you won’t be able to see ‘the funny men’, as you call them. I suppose the tall one is quite amusing. I understand he claims to be a native of Saskatchewan, though I find it unlikely, the shapes of his vowels are all wrong. What are you going to try next?”
She was sucking at her finger, and eyeing him mistrustfully.
“Okay. Can’t get the door open. So it’s just me and the wolf. Wish I hadn’t seen Cujo last week. This one’s a, a police wolf. He’s probably trained. But he won’t have eaten for hours. Aren’t wolves always hunting? He’s a police wolf who hasn’t been fed. So he’s either going to help me or eat me. Great. And now I'm talking to myself. I need to get out of here.”
“I... Really, there are so many things wrong with that sentence, I don’t know where to begin. I will concede a fondness for pastries, but I am not a complete slave to my stomach. And I fully expect Benton to be here at any moment, he said he would follow me shortly.”
“Well, he’d better get on with it, then,” snapped Stella.
The moment hung in the air. Dief looked at Stella, and Stella looked at Dief.
“I’m pretty sure I’m not insane, but you...” she began, only to be interrupted by the lock turning and the door opening.
“Fraser! Where’ve you been? Where’s Ray?”
“We’ve been apprehending Mr Callahan. Ray is delivering him to the station and Ray is downstairs, arresting the security guard. I trust Diefenbaker was well behaved?”
“I suppose so,” she conceded, uncertainly. Diefenbaker unwound himself from Fraser’s ankles, and barked.
Stella eyed him suspiciously as she picked up her purse and coat, and pushed past Fraser.
“Really, it’s almost as though he understands every word,” she remarked, pointedly. She strode away, Fraser and Dief watching her go.
“Have you been talking to people again? We discussed this, didn't we?”
“She’s a very intelligent woman,” replied Dief, haughtily. “It’s almost as though she understands every word.”
He padded off down the corridor after Stella, tail wagging merrily, leaving Fraser to follow in his wake.
For: diabolicalfiend. Hope you enjoy it!
Prompt: A fic with Stella and Dief and the line: 'he's either going to help or eat me. Great.'
Characters: Stella, Dief, Fraser
Word Count: 735
Rating: PG
It was late on Friday evening and, for reasons that don’t need explaining at this juncture, ASA Stella Vecchio had been locked into Harry Callahan’s accountancy office with Diefenbaker.
“It’s perfectly simple,” Dief said. “The door is locked. The key has been removed. The window is similarly locked, and furthermore, we are five stories from the ground. That this was intentional seems beyond question, although the reasons for it elude me. That we are to be left to perish seems unlikely; in the worst case we will be released on Monday morning, when the workers return.”
He settled comfortably into a squishy armchair by the water cooler, and looked at Stella. Unsurprisingly, she failed to respond and instead carried on trying to unscrew the door handle with her nail file while not letting him out of her sight.
“It seems improbable in the extreme that your cosmetic accessories will be sufficient to gain egress via what is evidently a high-security office door. And if you don’t pay attention to what you’re doing...”
“Dammit!” The file snapped in Stella’s hand, and the sharp tang of blood was released into the office air.
“There! Now you have sustained an entirely unnecessary injury, damaged your property, and made no progress whatsoever. You should follow my example, and reserve your strength for when it is required. I intend to avail myself of the entertainment facilities at hand.”
He leaned heavily on the remote control.
“THANK GOD YOU’RE HERE, SURPRISED-BY-EVERYTHING BOY!” bellowed a television, mounted high on the office wall.
“What the...!” Stella jumped to her feet, and stared wildly around the room, before catching sight of the remote.
“Oh, it was you, was it? I might have known.”
“THE WORLD SUPPLY OF PIZZA HAS RUN OUT!” exclaimed a bald man, looking appropriately distressed.
Stella edged over, and tried to reach the remote without actually coming within arm’s length.
“Er, good boy,” she muttered, unconvincingly. “He’s a good boy. Yes he is. You just watch the funny men.” She steeled herself to move close enough to grab the remote and mute the TV, and retreated to a corner.
“There’s really no need to speak to me like a child. And if you stand over there, you won’t be able to see ‘the funny men’, as you call them. I suppose the tall one is quite amusing. I understand he claims to be a native of Saskatchewan, though I find it unlikely, the shapes of his vowels are all wrong. What are you going to try next?”
She was sucking at her finger, and eyeing him mistrustfully.
“Okay. Can’t get the door open. So it’s just me and the wolf. Wish I hadn’t seen Cujo last week. This one’s a, a police wolf. He’s probably trained. But he won’t have eaten for hours. Aren’t wolves always hunting? He’s a police wolf who hasn’t been fed. So he’s either going to help me or eat me. Great. And now I'm talking to myself. I need to get out of here.”
“I... Really, there are so many things wrong with that sentence, I don’t know where to begin. I will concede a fondness for pastries, but I am not a complete slave to my stomach. And I fully expect Benton to be here at any moment, he said he would follow me shortly.”
“Well, he’d better get on with it, then,” snapped Stella.
The moment hung in the air. Dief looked at Stella, and Stella looked at Dief.
“I’m pretty sure I’m not insane, but you...” she began, only to be interrupted by the lock turning and the door opening.
“Fraser! Where’ve you been? Where’s Ray?”
“We’ve been apprehending Mr Callahan. Ray is delivering him to the station and Ray is downstairs, arresting the security guard. I trust Diefenbaker was well behaved?”
“I suppose so,” she conceded, uncertainly. Diefenbaker unwound himself from Fraser’s ankles, and barked.
Stella eyed him suspiciously as she picked up her purse and coat, and pushed past Fraser.
“Really, it’s almost as though he understands every word,” she remarked, pointedly. She strode away, Fraser and Dief watching her go.
“Have you been talking to people again? We discussed this, didn't we?”
“She’s a very intelligent woman,” replied Dief, haughtily. “It’s almost as though she understands every word.”
He padded off down the corridor after Stella, tail wagging merrily, leaving Fraser to follow in his wake.