Doritos on the Slippery Slope 1/1 Giles/Xander
Doritos on the Slippery Slope
by Dr Squidlove
drsquidlove@@@livejournal.com
Archive at No One Knows, please Sofy. Otherwise, please ask before archiving.
Giles' standards have plummetted since he discovered unemployment. Budweiser may be the newest low, but he draws the line at Doritos.
Giles/Xander
PWP, Un-Romance
Set early-ish season 4.
Rated R for sex. No violence, everyone's 18+.
2939 words.
Feedback is delicious, and also part of a balanced breakfast.
Giles, Xander and the Buffyverse are the property of Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy.
Not beta'd. I'm just going to set it free.
Huge thanks to antennapedia for making us all get Giles drunk this year.
Written for Drunken Giles 2010for secondalto's prompt:
#67 Giles/Xander Season 4, in Xander's basement, bad American beer induces confessions.
Giles sagged back into the couch as Xander came down the stairs. He'd probably been bracing himself in case Xander's parents had got home early. If that happened, Giles'd need more than a good jump reflex to fix the situation.
Xander held the six-pack and Doritos aloft. "I bring sustenance."
"You can't be serious."
Xander lowered the beer and chips as the wind was sucked out of him. He didn't know why he kept expecting things were going to be different between him and Giles. Well, there was the obvious, obviously, but that didn't seem to have made an impact on the broader smart guy/simpleton buddy-sitcom relationship they had going. "You think my Dad's got Johnnie Blue in the cellar? You think I'd take it if he did?"
Giles managed to keep his mouth shut until Xander dropped onto the couch beside him, offering a can of Budweiser. "I can't believe I'm doing something so juvenile."
"You really wanna hold your juvenile years up as some kind of blueprint?"
"Not particularly." He didn't bother to hide his disgust as he popped the tab and took his first sip.
"Just chug," Xander advised. "It goes down better that way." Xander took a long drink. It wasn't that bad. It was beer. This wasn't a microbrewery kind of house.
It wasn't that Xander didn't want Giles here. He just wished Giles wasn't so great at making him feel like a hick.
Giles steeled himself and chugged, throat working as it went down, and Xander's eyes followed. Xander didn't want to be chowing down on beer and Doritos right now either, but even after all these weeks of doing odd jobs in Giles' apartment, hanging out was still weird and awkward. The other stuff once it got started, not so awkward, but Xander hadn't quite mastered the art of the segue. Instead, when Giles showed up at Xander's door this afternoon for the first time ever, Xander babbled about grabbing some snacks, stole corn chips and beer from the kitchen, and tried to pretend he didn't have an erection twisted in his pants. Xander tore open the chips, and offered them up.
Giles' appalled look kind of made up for the rest of it. "I may be sitting on a fold-out couch, hiding from an eighteen year-old's parents, drinking what is without doubt the worst beer I've ever tasted in my life, but I draw the line at eating anything that particularly unnatural shade of orange."
"I didn't make you come here."
Giles looked around for somewhere to put his drink, finally just drained the can and leaned over and put it on the floor, followed by his glasses, before turning to face Xander better. "I didn't come here for the beer."
Well, obviously. And now Xander's stomach was doing that wash cycle thing. Xander dumped his half-full can on the floor too, and yanked open his fly. Giles groaned, and got right on with helping.
Lips were nuzzling Xander's throat and a hand was pushing at his shirt and another, better hand was working its way into his shorts to- Ohhh. So much better. This was sex number five with Giles, or maybe it deserved a Roman numeral V, and Xander still didn't know why it was happening, but it was basically the best thing that was happening in his life right now. He wasn't going to question it too hard.
Hard. So very hard.
They got Xander's jeans down to his thighs and Xander went for Giles' shirt-buttons, fighting his way in to run his fingers through the hair on his chest, up and along the smooth, strong shoulders. Xander jerked as his cock was squeezed.
He really, really hoped Giles was going to suck him off. That was where it all started. Somehow Giles offering fatherly advice on the dangers of dating an ex-vengeance demon - which Xander wasn't - put them on a path to Xander being pressed up against a bookcase with Giles on his knees sucking Xander's cock. Xander had turned it all over in his mind a whole bunch of times since, but he still couldn't retrace all the steps.
Xander reached for Giles' pants and popped the button and slid the zip and Giles' erection pushed greedily into his hand, straining his briefs, the wet tip pushing past the elastic to paint Xander's wrist. Inside the briefs was hot and damp with sweat and Giles choked out a sound when Xander reached deeper. When you had Giles by the balls, you could have anything you wanted. Xander had figured that out all by himself.
If you'd asked Xander a year ago what he thought Giles would be like in bed, he would have insisted very loudly that he wouldn't think about Giles in bed. Ever. Inside his head, Xander would have imagined him all chivalrous and gentle and polite. Not begging a guy to play rougher with his balls, or beating himself off until he came all over that same guy's face like he did to Xander last weekend.
Giles pushed Xander's t-shirt over his head and licked each of his nipples, found some special place just below one and sucked hard.
Xander wouldn't have imagined this fetish for hickeys, either. Giles' mouth came up dangerously close to Xander's collar-line, his thick cock rocking against Xander's inner thigh. Xander pushed his own cock into Giles' firm belly and Giles' teeth sharpened, and he honest-to-god growled into Xander's skin.
* * *
Giles rolled off to stare up at the ceiling, panting. Xander grabbed his t-shirt and used it to wipe off his stomach, taking a moment to admire the darkening bruise Giles had bitten into his hip. This was the part where at Giles' place, Giles usually pulled on his pants and started shuffling around the apartment, tidying or folding or hovering over books, signalling it was time to go. This time, he could just exit, stage right.
He didn't. Somehow Giles was so out of it, he cracked open another can. He still cringed as he lifted it to his lips, but he drank it anyway.
Xander knew how to deal with the subtle 'get out' messages. He got out. He didn't know what to do with Giles naked on his couch, drinking Bud, except try not to snicker because the image was funny as hell but he was pretty sure Giles wouldn't appreciate it.
Sticking around was a very bad idea. Giles was going to throw the system into chaos. They sniped at each other, they had sex, they went their separate ways. If anything disturbed the balance, Giles was going to remember that Xander was eighteen and stupid, and this whole thing was going down in flames. Xander didn't know what was going on, but he knew for sure he was happy with it just the way it was.
Xander picked up his own beer, because he didn't know what else to do. He didn't have any way to entertain Giles. Except what they just did, of course, and Giles probably wasn't up for another round of that yet.
A door slammed upstairs and they both sat up.
"You said they weren't coming home," Giles hissed.
"They're not supposed to be."
His parents' voices rose, arguing, and Xander dipped his head. Really? They had to do this now, while Giles was here to hear it?
Giles was up and searching out his clothes.
"You can't leave now! They'll see you!"
"I'm certainly not going to have them tramp down here to find me naked."
Fair point. Xander untangled his own clothes and yanked them on. "I'll go up and say hello, so they don't come down to check on me."
"For gods' sake, clean yourself off properly, first. You smell like sex."
Xander's cheeks burned, and his stomach tingled. He smelled like Giles. That was pretty cool, any time except right now. He dashed into the bathroom for a washcloth and scrubbed himself a little better, checked his reflection for visible hickeys, and then headed upstairs.
* * *
The fight had cooled and Xander's mom had decided to cook dinner, which pretty much left them trapped down here. It would have been good right about now if Giles and Xander had anything in common to talk about. They'd already spent five minutes on what Buffy and Willow were doing off at college without them, and that dried up that topic. Xander wished he had a TV down here. It didn't help that Giles had been whittling away the six-pack while Xander was caught upstairs talking to his mom. Xander had a drunk guy in his basement, steadily getting drunker.
Everything used to be so simple. Xander was Buffy's annoying friend that Giles didn't kick out of the library because he helped with the research and they had that hellmouth-survival bonding thing going on in the background. Now... Now there was no Buffy in the middle, and it seemed like Xander was still annoying but he'd somehow become a worthy role model for Giles' newly downwardly mobile lifestyle. And also, apparently, good for the sex.
Xander seriously didn't mind being used for his body, since Giles was pretty damned good for the sex, too. When you considered this whole situation from every direction - and Xander was pretty sure he'd covered every direction - then this was the best weird the Hellmouth had ever served up.
That was why they weren't supposed to hang out afterwards. Somewhere in between the nudity and the hickey-giving was the uptight British watcher, and any minute that guy was going to bust out and use a lot of long words to explain why this entire sexual situation was inappropriate. Indecent. Maybe even reprehensible.
Giles tipped back the last of his fourth beer and frowned at it, like the can was to blame for being empty. That was when he finally looked over and said, "This is criminal."
"I'm eighteen. Totally legal. Well, not for the alcohol, but for the other thing-"
"I meant this badger piss." Giles raised his beer. "Honestly, is there anything your lot can't ruin?"
"My lot?"
"Americans."
"We ruined your redcoat army pretty good. Do we have to have another talk about who the minority is, here?" Xander didn't know if this was more banter or if Giles was being a grumpy drunk.
The door at the top of the stairs swung open and Giles had vaulted over the couch with a crash and a grunt before Xander's mom called "Alexander?"
Xander was on his feet when she made it far enough down the stairs to bend over and see him. She looked at him strangely. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah. Sure. Fine, Mom." Just hanging out, standing in the middle of the room by himself.
"Did I hear a crash?"
"It was, um, don't worry about it. It wasn't anything."
She didn't believe him at all. "Dinner's ready. Are you coming up to eat?"
"Nah, I'll eat down here. I'm... doing stuff."
It wouldn't hurt to get some food into Giles, so Xander left him behind the couch and followed his mom up to grab a hunk of meatloaf and some mashed potato, brushing off his mom's comment about the size of his appetite.
* * *
Down in the basement, Giles was back on the couch, drunk enough that he didn't look embarrassed about his recent vault over the furniture.
Xander pushed his dirty clothes off the table and set down the plate, digging a fork out of his pocket for Giles before sticking his own into the potato. "Did you break anything?"
"No damage."
"Just a big old slab of dignity."
Giles snorted as he lifted his can. "I gave that up at some point before I started drinking stolen American beer in my boyfriend's basement."
Xander put down his fork. "You think of me as your boyfriend?"
Giles' eyes popped. "Sorry. I didn't mean to..." He looked away and took another drink.
Boyfriend? No. Because okay, yeah, they had sex, but they didn't do boyfriend-stuff, like go out to dinner or tell anyone or like each other all that much. Well, Xander liked Giles, most of the time, pretty much any time he wasn't being totally unnecessarily condescending, but it wasn't mutual.
"Xander..."
"Yeah?"
Giles ran his finger over the Bud logo, working up to something Xander was pretty sure neither of them wanted. Xander's lungs hurt, holding his breath.
"Never mind."
"Just say it," Xander said before he could stop himself.
Giles twisted and leaned over and clumsily dragged his mouth over Xander's. The beer can he was holding pressed up against Xander's side and he zeroed in, lips pulling at Xander's, the tip of his tongue flicking against him and darting away.
All the air Xander had been stocking up slipped away as Giles dipped in again. This was new.
They'd kissed before, sure, mouths jammed together as their cocks thrust, but they hadn't done this. Kissed. Delicate and sweet and tickling along Xander's nerves, Giles' breath drifting inside him. Xander whimpered and Giles edged a little closer, licked a little deeper, traced Xander's teeth and then found his tongue and shyly withdrew. Giles tasted like cheap beer, and no fancy imported brew was ever going to taste better.
Giles pulled away, flushed, lips wet. "I'm sorry."
"You're sorry?" He was taking it back already?
Giles rubbed his eyes. "I don't mean to... It's the beer talking."
No way was Xander letting this little revelation slide under the couch. "The beer wasn't talking. I can tell you, I know a little something about talking. That was something very different from talking."
"I don't want to muddle this up with my feelings."
"You have feelings?"
"I should go." Giles stood up, taking a couple of seconds to be sure he'd found up.
"My mom's at the top of those stairs."
Giles sat again, suddenly. "I should stay."
For once, Xander was incredibly grateful she was up there, blocking the exit. "Talk."
"No. No, no." Giles rubbed his forehead. "I'm quite drunk. Terrible idea."
"Then kiss me again."
Giles stared at him for a long time, and then he did, and this round was even better. It was all soft teasing and slow tongue and lips carving a space somewhere deep inside Xander until it was a yawning cavern of need. Giles' beer had gone and his hands were in Xander's hair, tracing his jaw, resting against his chest.
Xander slid back and Giles followed until they were lying along the couch, Giles a solid weight on top, and their hips were rocking but it was the side show, the B-side to the incredible Sgt Pepper's A-side happening up here where Xander could taste, feel, Giles in his mouth. Xander slid his hands under Giles' shirt, searching for skin and Giles arched against him, and then the kiss was broken and Giles' face was pressed into Xander's neck, fast hot breath against his throat and Giles muttered something.
"What?"
More muffled words, until Xander pushed him back.
Giles wouldn't meet his eyes. "Don't like being your dirty dark secret. Tired of you racing off afterwards."
Xander's mouth opened, and stayed there. "You do want to be boyfriends?"
"Lord, Xander, you really can make anything sound crass and juvenile."
"Says the forty-six year-old getting drunk on Budweiser in a basement because he's hiding from my-"
"Oh just..." He untangled himself and pushed Xander's legs off the couch to take his seat. "Forget I said anything."
"Forget you want to be boyfriends?"
"I never said any such thing."
"Then what did you mean?"
"Never mind." Giles stood up again, took two steps towards the stairs and then seemed to remember that wasn't an option, and turned back. "I'm quite sure you have better things to do with your time than waste it with a middle-aged ex-librarian."
Xander laughed. "I think you're over-estimating what I have to do with my time."
"What do you mean?"
"What do you mean?" Xander countered.
It was like an explosion of words and flailing hands. "Oh, for goodness' bloody sake. I enjoy your company. I want more of it. The sex is bloody fantastic but I wish you'd stick around afterwards instead of racing out the door like your arse is on fire. On the rare occasions that Buffy visits, I'd like her to at least half-expect to find you there with me. I want you around. Is that too much to bloody ask?"
Xander considered that. "No? I mean, that sounds pretty cool to me."
"Oh." Giles came back, and sat down again.
Xander looked at him. "You'd want Buffy and Willow to know?"
"Why wouldn't I?"
"You wouldn't be embarrassed? I mean, you don't think much of me."
"When have I ever said that?"
"Every second time you've opened your mouth since you got here this afternoon?"
Giles felt around the couch until he found his glasses and slid them on. "Xander, my contempt is for this travesty of beer you drink. I may be tired and emotional right now, but I assure you I can tell you apart from a hops-based beverage."
"Oh." Xander tried to rearrange everything in his head. It was way too confusing. "So you really do want to be..." He didn't have another word for it.
"Yes, Xander. I want to be 'boyfriends'." He said it with the same wince he used when he called what he was drinking 'beer'. "However..."
There was a catch. Of course there was a catch. "Yeah?"
"In future, I really would prefer to meet at my flat."
-----
More Squidfic can be found at
The Lecherous Tentacles of Dr Squidlove
http://members.iinet.net.au/~tentacles/squidfic.html
by Dr Squidlove
drsquidlove@@@livejournal.com
Archive at No One Knows, please Sofy. Otherwise, please ask before archiving.
Giles' standards have plummetted since he discovered unemployment. Budweiser may be the newest low, but he draws the line at Doritos.
Giles/Xander
PWP, Un-Romance
Set early-ish season 4.
Rated R for sex. No violence, everyone's 18+.
2939 words.
Feedback is delicious, and also part of a balanced breakfast.
Giles, Xander and the Buffyverse are the property of Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy.
Not beta'd. I'm just going to set it free.
Huge thanks to antennapedia for making us all get Giles drunk this year.
Written for Drunken Giles 2010for secondalto's prompt:
#67 Giles/Xander Season 4, in Xander's basement, bad American beer induces confessions.
Giles sagged back into the couch as Xander came down the stairs. He'd probably been bracing himself in case Xander's parents had got home early. If that happened, Giles'd need more than a good jump reflex to fix the situation.
Xander held the six-pack and Doritos aloft. "I bring sustenance."
"You can't be serious."
Xander lowered the beer and chips as the wind was sucked out of him. He didn't know why he kept expecting things were going to be different between him and Giles. Well, there was the obvious, obviously, but that didn't seem to have made an impact on the broader smart guy/simpleton buddy-sitcom relationship they had going. "You think my Dad's got Johnnie Blue in the cellar? You think I'd take it if he did?"
Giles managed to keep his mouth shut until Xander dropped onto the couch beside him, offering a can of Budweiser. "I can't believe I'm doing something so juvenile."
"You really wanna hold your juvenile years up as some kind of blueprint?"
"Not particularly." He didn't bother to hide his disgust as he popped the tab and took his first sip.
"Just chug," Xander advised. "It goes down better that way." Xander took a long drink. It wasn't that bad. It was beer. This wasn't a microbrewery kind of house.
It wasn't that Xander didn't want Giles here. He just wished Giles wasn't so great at making him feel like a hick.
Giles steeled himself and chugged, throat working as it went down, and Xander's eyes followed. Xander didn't want to be chowing down on beer and Doritos right now either, but even after all these weeks of doing odd jobs in Giles' apartment, hanging out was still weird and awkward. The other stuff once it got started, not so awkward, but Xander hadn't quite mastered the art of the segue. Instead, when Giles showed up at Xander's door this afternoon for the first time ever, Xander babbled about grabbing some snacks, stole corn chips and beer from the kitchen, and tried to pretend he didn't have an erection twisted in his pants. Xander tore open the chips, and offered them up.
Giles' appalled look kind of made up for the rest of it. "I may be sitting on a fold-out couch, hiding from an eighteen year-old's parents, drinking what is without doubt the worst beer I've ever tasted in my life, but I draw the line at eating anything that particularly unnatural shade of orange."
"I didn't make you come here."
Giles looked around for somewhere to put his drink, finally just drained the can and leaned over and put it on the floor, followed by his glasses, before turning to face Xander better. "I didn't come here for the beer."
Well, obviously. And now Xander's stomach was doing that wash cycle thing. Xander dumped his half-full can on the floor too, and yanked open his fly. Giles groaned, and got right on with helping.
Lips were nuzzling Xander's throat and a hand was pushing at his shirt and another, better hand was working its way into his shorts to- Ohhh. So much better. This was sex number five with Giles, or maybe it deserved a Roman numeral V, and Xander still didn't know why it was happening, but it was basically the best thing that was happening in his life right now. He wasn't going to question it too hard.
Hard. So very hard.
They got Xander's jeans down to his thighs and Xander went for Giles' shirt-buttons, fighting his way in to run his fingers through the hair on his chest, up and along the smooth, strong shoulders. Xander jerked as his cock was squeezed.
He really, really hoped Giles was going to suck him off. That was where it all started. Somehow Giles offering fatherly advice on the dangers of dating an ex-vengeance demon - which Xander wasn't - put them on a path to Xander being pressed up against a bookcase with Giles on his knees sucking Xander's cock. Xander had turned it all over in his mind a whole bunch of times since, but he still couldn't retrace all the steps.
Xander reached for Giles' pants and popped the button and slid the zip and Giles' erection pushed greedily into his hand, straining his briefs, the wet tip pushing past the elastic to paint Xander's wrist. Inside the briefs was hot and damp with sweat and Giles choked out a sound when Xander reached deeper. When you had Giles by the balls, you could have anything you wanted. Xander had figured that out all by himself.
If you'd asked Xander a year ago what he thought Giles would be like in bed, he would have insisted very loudly that he wouldn't think about Giles in bed. Ever. Inside his head, Xander would have imagined him all chivalrous and gentle and polite. Not begging a guy to play rougher with his balls, or beating himself off until he came all over that same guy's face like he did to Xander last weekend.
Giles pushed Xander's t-shirt over his head and licked each of his nipples, found some special place just below one and sucked hard.
Xander wouldn't have imagined this fetish for hickeys, either. Giles' mouth came up dangerously close to Xander's collar-line, his thick cock rocking against Xander's inner thigh. Xander pushed his own cock into Giles' firm belly and Giles' teeth sharpened, and he honest-to-god growled into Xander's skin.
* * *
Giles rolled off to stare up at the ceiling, panting. Xander grabbed his t-shirt and used it to wipe off his stomach, taking a moment to admire the darkening bruise Giles had bitten into his hip. This was the part where at Giles' place, Giles usually pulled on his pants and started shuffling around the apartment, tidying or folding or hovering over books, signalling it was time to go. This time, he could just exit, stage right.
He didn't. Somehow Giles was so out of it, he cracked open another can. He still cringed as he lifted it to his lips, but he drank it anyway.
Xander knew how to deal with the subtle 'get out' messages. He got out. He didn't know what to do with Giles naked on his couch, drinking Bud, except try not to snicker because the image was funny as hell but he was pretty sure Giles wouldn't appreciate it.
Sticking around was a very bad idea. Giles was going to throw the system into chaos. They sniped at each other, they had sex, they went their separate ways. If anything disturbed the balance, Giles was going to remember that Xander was eighteen and stupid, and this whole thing was going down in flames. Xander didn't know what was going on, but he knew for sure he was happy with it just the way it was.
Xander picked up his own beer, because he didn't know what else to do. He didn't have any way to entertain Giles. Except what they just did, of course, and Giles probably wasn't up for another round of that yet.
A door slammed upstairs and they both sat up.
"You said they weren't coming home," Giles hissed.
"They're not supposed to be."
His parents' voices rose, arguing, and Xander dipped his head. Really? They had to do this now, while Giles was here to hear it?
Giles was up and searching out his clothes.
"You can't leave now! They'll see you!"
"I'm certainly not going to have them tramp down here to find me naked."
Fair point. Xander untangled his own clothes and yanked them on. "I'll go up and say hello, so they don't come down to check on me."
"For gods' sake, clean yourself off properly, first. You smell like sex."
Xander's cheeks burned, and his stomach tingled. He smelled like Giles. That was pretty cool, any time except right now. He dashed into the bathroom for a washcloth and scrubbed himself a little better, checked his reflection for visible hickeys, and then headed upstairs.
* * *
The fight had cooled and Xander's mom had decided to cook dinner, which pretty much left them trapped down here. It would have been good right about now if Giles and Xander had anything in common to talk about. They'd already spent five minutes on what Buffy and Willow were doing off at college without them, and that dried up that topic. Xander wished he had a TV down here. It didn't help that Giles had been whittling away the six-pack while Xander was caught upstairs talking to his mom. Xander had a drunk guy in his basement, steadily getting drunker.
Everything used to be so simple. Xander was Buffy's annoying friend that Giles didn't kick out of the library because he helped with the research and they had that hellmouth-survival bonding thing going on in the background. Now... Now there was no Buffy in the middle, and it seemed like Xander was still annoying but he'd somehow become a worthy role model for Giles' newly downwardly mobile lifestyle. And also, apparently, good for the sex.
Xander seriously didn't mind being used for his body, since Giles was pretty damned good for the sex, too. When you considered this whole situation from every direction - and Xander was pretty sure he'd covered every direction - then this was the best weird the Hellmouth had ever served up.
That was why they weren't supposed to hang out afterwards. Somewhere in between the nudity and the hickey-giving was the uptight British watcher, and any minute that guy was going to bust out and use a lot of long words to explain why this entire sexual situation was inappropriate. Indecent. Maybe even reprehensible.
Giles tipped back the last of his fourth beer and frowned at it, like the can was to blame for being empty. That was when he finally looked over and said, "This is criminal."
"I'm eighteen. Totally legal. Well, not for the alcohol, but for the other thing-"
"I meant this badger piss." Giles raised his beer. "Honestly, is there anything your lot can't ruin?"
"My lot?"
"Americans."
"We ruined your redcoat army pretty good. Do we have to have another talk about who the minority is, here?" Xander didn't know if this was more banter or if Giles was being a grumpy drunk.
The door at the top of the stairs swung open and Giles had vaulted over the couch with a crash and a grunt before Xander's mom called "Alexander?"
Xander was on his feet when she made it far enough down the stairs to bend over and see him. She looked at him strangely. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah. Sure. Fine, Mom." Just hanging out, standing in the middle of the room by himself.
"Did I hear a crash?"
"It was, um, don't worry about it. It wasn't anything."
She didn't believe him at all. "Dinner's ready. Are you coming up to eat?"
"Nah, I'll eat down here. I'm... doing stuff."
It wouldn't hurt to get some food into Giles, so Xander left him behind the couch and followed his mom up to grab a hunk of meatloaf and some mashed potato, brushing off his mom's comment about the size of his appetite.
* * *
Down in the basement, Giles was back on the couch, drunk enough that he didn't look embarrassed about his recent vault over the furniture.
Xander pushed his dirty clothes off the table and set down the plate, digging a fork out of his pocket for Giles before sticking his own into the potato. "Did you break anything?"
"No damage."
"Just a big old slab of dignity."
Giles snorted as he lifted his can. "I gave that up at some point before I started drinking stolen American beer in my boyfriend's basement."
Xander put down his fork. "You think of me as your boyfriend?"
Giles' eyes popped. "Sorry. I didn't mean to..." He looked away and took another drink.
Boyfriend? No. Because okay, yeah, they had sex, but they didn't do boyfriend-stuff, like go out to dinner or tell anyone or like each other all that much. Well, Xander liked Giles, most of the time, pretty much any time he wasn't being totally unnecessarily condescending, but it wasn't mutual.
"Xander..."
"Yeah?"
Giles ran his finger over the Bud logo, working up to something Xander was pretty sure neither of them wanted. Xander's lungs hurt, holding his breath.
"Never mind."
"Just say it," Xander said before he could stop himself.
Giles twisted and leaned over and clumsily dragged his mouth over Xander's. The beer can he was holding pressed up against Xander's side and he zeroed in, lips pulling at Xander's, the tip of his tongue flicking against him and darting away.
All the air Xander had been stocking up slipped away as Giles dipped in again. This was new.
They'd kissed before, sure, mouths jammed together as their cocks thrust, but they hadn't done this. Kissed. Delicate and sweet and tickling along Xander's nerves, Giles' breath drifting inside him. Xander whimpered and Giles edged a little closer, licked a little deeper, traced Xander's teeth and then found his tongue and shyly withdrew. Giles tasted like cheap beer, and no fancy imported brew was ever going to taste better.
Giles pulled away, flushed, lips wet. "I'm sorry."
"You're sorry?" He was taking it back already?
Giles rubbed his eyes. "I don't mean to... It's the beer talking."
No way was Xander letting this little revelation slide under the couch. "The beer wasn't talking. I can tell you, I know a little something about talking. That was something very different from talking."
"I don't want to muddle this up with my feelings."
"You have feelings?"
"I should go." Giles stood up, taking a couple of seconds to be sure he'd found up.
"My mom's at the top of those stairs."
Giles sat again, suddenly. "I should stay."
For once, Xander was incredibly grateful she was up there, blocking the exit. "Talk."
"No. No, no." Giles rubbed his forehead. "I'm quite drunk. Terrible idea."
"Then kiss me again."
Giles stared at him for a long time, and then he did, and this round was even better. It was all soft teasing and slow tongue and lips carving a space somewhere deep inside Xander until it was a yawning cavern of need. Giles' beer had gone and his hands were in Xander's hair, tracing his jaw, resting against his chest.
Xander slid back and Giles followed until they were lying along the couch, Giles a solid weight on top, and their hips were rocking but it was the side show, the B-side to the incredible Sgt Pepper's A-side happening up here where Xander could taste, feel, Giles in his mouth. Xander slid his hands under Giles' shirt, searching for skin and Giles arched against him, and then the kiss was broken and Giles' face was pressed into Xander's neck, fast hot breath against his throat and Giles muttered something.
"What?"
More muffled words, until Xander pushed him back.
Giles wouldn't meet his eyes. "Don't like being your dirty dark secret. Tired of you racing off afterwards."
Xander's mouth opened, and stayed there. "You do want to be boyfriends?"
"Lord, Xander, you really can make anything sound crass and juvenile."
"Says the forty-six year-old getting drunk on Budweiser in a basement because he's hiding from my-"
"Oh just..." He untangled himself and pushed Xander's legs off the couch to take his seat. "Forget I said anything."
"Forget you want to be boyfriends?"
"I never said any such thing."
"Then what did you mean?"
"Never mind." Giles stood up again, took two steps towards the stairs and then seemed to remember that wasn't an option, and turned back. "I'm quite sure you have better things to do with your time than waste it with a middle-aged ex-librarian."
Xander laughed. "I think you're over-estimating what I have to do with my time."
"What do you mean?"
"What do you mean?" Xander countered.
It was like an explosion of words and flailing hands. "Oh, for goodness' bloody sake. I enjoy your company. I want more of it. The sex is bloody fantastic but I wish you'd stick around afterwards instead of racing out the door like your arse is on fire. On the rare occasions that Buffy visits, I'd like her to at least half-expect to find you there with me. I want you around. Is that too much to bloody ask?"
Xander considered that. "No? I mean, that sounds pretty cool to me."
"Oh." Giles came back, and sat down again.
Xander looked at him. "You'd want Buffy and Willow to know?"
"Why wouldn't I?"
"You wouldn't be embarrassed? I mean, you don't think much of me."
"When have I ever said that?"
"Every second time you've opened your mouth since you got here this afternoon?"
Giles felt around the couch until he found his glasses and slid them on. "Xander, my contempt is for this travesty of beer you drink. I may be tired and emotional right now, but I assure you I can tell you apart from a hops-based beverage."
"Oh." Xander tried to rearrange everything in his head. It was way too confusing. "So you really do want to be..." He didn't have another word for it.
"Yes, Xander. I want to be 'boyfriends'." He said it with the same wince he used when he called what he was drinking 'beer'. "However..."
There was a catch. Of course there was a catch. "Yeah?"
"In future, I really would prefer to meet at my flat."
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More Squidfic can be found at
The Lecherous Tentacles of Dr Squidlove
http://members.iinet.net.au/~tentacles/squidfic.html