Taichi's back story: The One Who Left Me Behind (Part 1)
Title: The One Who Left Me Behind (part 1)
Summary: When someone leaves, is hurt and betrayed, who really is the traitor, and who is really left behind? A Taichi Backstory, and a glimpse at the man he is. By drelfina (Taichi) and FC (everyone else. >.>)
The One Who Left Me Behind (part 1)
Simple mission, this time. Not too far from home - Taichi didn't need a spotter or handler for this; the man was known to be not violent, and they just needed to have him be spotted with a prostitute. He wouldn't want it known to his wife or his wife's family, so that was a nice perfect little setup to use.
The target walked into room, humming in appreciation, eyes slowly running up and down Taichi's body.
"Pretty. What's your name?"
"Kira," Taichi purred, sitting up, letting the yukata smooth down over a shoulder. "Tanaka-saaan, want to come over here?"
The girl was very good, he noted idly, happy that his staff had taken their time.
"Sure." The man murmured, walking over.
Taichi cooed at the target, knowing full well that the cameras were running. She waited till the man was close to the bed, and she slid over, opening her legs to frame his hip over the edge. "Mou, Tanaka-saaan."
"Yes, you pretty thing?" He murmured, blunt fingers skimming over Taichi's cheek, sliding down the slender length of her neck, slowly pushing the shoulder of the yukata lower.
"It's cold~" Taichi arched up, purring as the man's fingers smoothed down her back. Smooth, soft hand, utterly not ninja. Hm.
"Is it?" Tanaka murmured, fingers moving to Taichi's front, thumb rubbing over a pebbled nipple. "I see."
Taichi groaned, long, langrous, and reached up to tug the man's shoulders down. "I aaaam... Tanaka-san should do something about it, mm?"
"Perhaps I will." the man murmured, pushing the other shoulder of the yukata down, exposing Taichi's small, but pert breasts.
Taichi shivered, a long, slow movement. "mooou. You should, Tanaka-san... It was so cold here, alone, waiting for you....." She pressed up, pushing her breasts against his hips, his waist. "Tanaka-saaaan..."
"I see the pretty girl is impatient." Tanaka murmured. His soft fingers tugged at her obi, the silken material falling open, revealing a neatly trimmed red triangle of coarse hair, the soft curves of slim hips, and long slender legs.
"Natural red. I'm surprised."
"Mooou, Tanaka-san..." Taichi ducked her head, though she wasn't blushing. "You shouldn't say things like that~"
"Mmmm, and why not?" Tanaka murmured, sliding a hand along a length of creamy white leg, lift it up, kissing the inside of her ankle.
Taichi shivered, moaning, hooking her other leg around his waist. The way Tanaka was holding her, he was spreading her open too. Pervert. "Because it's not polite~"
"Oh?" He said with a soft purr, looking down, getting a good look of her moist pinkness. He smirked a little, seeing a flash of silver. His blunt finger pushed up the hood of her clit, brushing against the silver barbell pressed against her pink skin.
Taichi's breath caught in her chest, heaving against his hips. "aaaah, Tanaka-saaaan..." She squirmed a little, flexing slightly, knwoign he could see it.
Tanaka groaned softly, heat curling in him. His finger drew a line from her clit, down her slit to her entrance.
"mou..." Taichi squirmed, gasping and moaning loudly. It wasn't much, really, but the point here was to be as obvious, loud, and whorish as possible without looking fake.
Taichi was VERY good at this.
Tanaka pushed Taichi's further back on the bed, untangling her legs from his waist, sliding onto the bed.
"How about you undress me, Kira."
Taichi moaned, arching, and slithering under the man and tugged at his belt, his fly. "Tanaka-san, you're being lazy?"
"Maybe a little." He replied, one hand sliding down Taichi's flank, cupping her ass.
Taichi hummed, undoing his pants deftly, and pushing it down over his hips, and smoothed her palms up his stomach, over his abs. "Oh, Tanaka-san, you're so strong~ and biiig."
"Mmm," the man murmured, smiling slightly at the flattery. His hand slid up her belly, up to her chest, cupping a breast.
She purred, grinding into his hand, even as one of her hands moved down to fist his cock. "Oh, tanaka-sama~"
The older man groaned, arching up, his hand on her slipping a little, his breath starting to quicken a little.
He was an old man - heh. He would get spent fast, and the blackmail would be quick and dirty. Maybe another ten minutes.
Taichi cooed at him, and tickled at his balls. "What do you want, Tanaka-sama?"
Tanaka groaned, arching up, panting slightly.
"Want you to ride me."
Taichi giggled at him, andpushed lightly at his shoulder. "Then turn over, and I'll ride you like a horse, Tanaka-sama~"
Tanaka's breath hitched, and he rolled over, hands gripping at Taichi's smooth hips, tugging her over, so she was straddled over him. With a low moan he slipped his hand down, cupping her hot, wet pussy, large fingers teasing at her entrance.
Taichi moaned, writhing against him. "Oh yes... yes... push into my pussy, Tanaka-saaaama..."
Slowly, Tanaka pushed two into her, exploring her wet heat.
"Ngn....!" Taichi moaned, rocking her hips against him. "Oh yeah... oh yeah...!"
With a hitched breath, Tanaka rubbed his thumb against her clit, his fingers slowly thrusting into her.
"Mmm, Tanaka-saaan..." Taichi squirmed, moaning wantonly. "Want your cock in me, Tanaka-sama..."
"Of course." the man gasped, tugging his fingers out, grabbing her hips, smearing her juices on her pale skin. With a low groan, he tugged her down, slowly pushing into her.
"oh yes... yes..." Taichi moaned, loud and wanton, as she pressed down, and started to rock, squeeze on the man. "Faster... more... fuck me hard, Tanaka-san!"
"haaa..." Tanaka's head tilted back as he thrust up, burying his cock deep in her pussy, her wet walls clenching and unclenching around him.
Taichi groaned, breathing hard. Tanaka was going to come soon. soo soon, and then it'd be over. She couldn't wait to see his face...
She rocked against him, moaning, fucking herself on him.
Tanaka ran his soft hands up and down her body, hands eating up her soft curves. Grunting and moaning, he fucked harder into her tight body, nearly every nerve in his body screaming with the sensation.
Taichi purred, squeezing at him. "Gonna come," she gasped, even thought it was hardly near the case. But it didn't matter- because female orgasms were so much easier to fake.
Tanaka was rapidly approaching his own limit without faking it. With a low moan, he gripped hard at Taichi's hips, pulling down while he thrust up, coming after a few thrusts, shaking, and bucking.
Taichi moaned, squeezing down on the man, shuddering a little, watching him, feeling the warmth gush into him.
Tanaka fell back, gasping raggedly.
Taichi purred, sitting up, pulling off him and stretching. "Tanaka-san~" she started, about to slide off the bed and show him one of the video cameras, when the door opened.
Ichirou had been in to check, fairly sure that Tanaka should be done by now. He stopped short when he saw the whore on top of him. While it wasn't the gender he was used to, the flashing brown eyes, and red hair were unmistakable.
"Taichi?"
Taichi froze at the voice. The unmistakeable chakra signature. "Ichi..." He bit his lip a moment too late.
He'd blame the shock, after.
Mostly because... Ichirou was dead. Or had been presumed dead.
Tanaka, still breathless, looked at Ichirou.
"What the hell is going on....?"
Ichirou raked his hand through his long hair, the scars twisting across his half his face visible for a moment, before the long black hair fell back into place.
"That's no whore, Tanaka-san. That's a nin from Konoha, Hirato Taichi."
Taichi still stared at Ichirou. It was him, except for the scars. For a moment, the mission faded, the target faded from his awareness, and all he could see was Ichirou. Almost the same as what he last rmemebered. Except for the twisting, swirling scars.
"Shit." Tanaka scrambled away, quickly jerking his clothes on. He paused, once he was safely behind Ichirou.
"....You called her Taichi, a man's name."
"That's because he is." Ichirou replied carelessly. "Take the henge down, Taichi."
Taichi obeyed, the kai snapping through hsi fingers before he'd even realised it, Tanaka's jizz oozing slowly down his thighs. ".. Ichirou..." He wasn't dead.
Tanaka hissed, recoiling.
"What the fuck...."
"Tanaka-san." Ichirou said coolly, stemming the tide. "Get out of here, you were obviously set up. I'll check the room, and call back-up, you just get back, alright?"
Tanaka nodded, hurrying from the room.
"W-wait..." Taichi sat up, tensing, about to go after the man. Shit, the target was getting away!
"Taichi." Ichirou said, noting how Taichi had followed his earlier order. "You stay right there."
Taichi froze, automatically, and then the target was gone, and the mission was fucked, he should get out of here before more guards came... but Ichirou'd said for him to stay.
But Ichirou had been dead.
But he wasn't.
So that meant he was missing-nin.
"Taichi." Ichirou said, approaching the other man, sitting on the bed. "It's been a while."
"... you're missing-nin," Taichi said, eyes wide, pieces slowly clicking into place. "Why didn't you come back?"
"Why should I, when my team left me, bleeding in some god forsaken territory, ready to be picked off by the locals there?"
"They said you were dead," Taichi said, and it sounded like a broken record. "You.. the target got away!"
"They shouldn't have left me!" Ichirou shouted, old anguish resurfacing.
"But they said you were dead, and... and.. you can come back, Ichirou," Taichi said, leaning forward, reaching to touch the man's hand. "come back with me. Or rather, help me get my target, then come back."
It felt strange, to have a sort of... hope flare.
Ichirou's hand darted out, grabbing Taichi's wrist and twisted.
"Don't pull that shit on me, Taichi."
Taichi cried out, flipped over onto his back. "I-ichirou, I don't... I'm not trying anything... come back..."
"No." Ichirou hissed, leaning in. "Why should I risk my life for a village that doesn't even give a shit about me." His dark hair fell in a curtain around them, giving Taichi a good look of his scars.
Ichirou used to be handsome. Almost pretty. The scars didn't really change anything - he was still Ichirou. "They would have gone back for you if they'd known," Taichi said, voice small, eyes wide. "Please, Ichirou. You're... You're still my dom." Because if the man wasn't dead, then he could come back. Things would go back to the way they were.
"Oh, I am?"
Taichi nodded, eyes wide. "You're not traitor. Please, you can come back..."
"I don't want to go back."
How could Ichirou not want to come back? It baffled Taichi - it was inconcievable. "Please?" Every second he was here, pinned solely by the grip of his dom, his target was getting away. But it didn't matter - the cameras were still running, all he would have to do was stop them and take the footage, and send a copy to the target later. It didn't matter.
Ichirou mattered. And Ichirou had to come back. Of course he would come back.
"This isn't some matter you can try to change by batting your eyes at me, sucking my cock, or using the thousands of other tricks you know from seduction." Ichirou said coldly.
Taichi bit his lip. Ichirou'd been rarely cold with him. "Please," he said again, softly, pleadingly, tugging at the grip Ichirou had on his wrist, reaching with his other hand to try and touch the man's chin. "Please, no one will care, you could come back. It'd be the same as before. Please."
Ichirou jerked away.
"It won't be. I've changed."
"You're still Ichirou." Taich leaned up, managed to stroke his jaw. "Please... please, Ichirou. It's... you don't know but Kakashi's leaving ANBU and I've got a cute rookie dom, and Nobu likes him, I'm sure you'll like him, please, Ichirou."
"Fucking hell, Taichi." Ichirou snarled. "You want me to go back,and pretend it never happened? Go back to ANBU, to you?"
Taichi looked at him, perplexed and worried and just... why wouldn't he? Whywouldn't Ichirou want to? "Why not?"
"I don't even know why I bother." Ichirou snapped. "You won't understand no matter what I say."
Taichi made a soft noise, almost like he'd been hit. Or scolded. "I don't... please. why can't...?"
"What? You want me to go back? Go to back vanilla sex Mondays, bondage Wednesdays? A nice fucking regular schedule, so you won't have to deal with change?" Ichirou shook with anger, and finally settled for striking Taichi across the face.
Taichi whimpered at the strike, didn't try to avoid it. "It doesn't have to be on a schedule, if you don't want it to be!"
"Fuck, Taichi! That's not the fucking point!"
"I don't get it then!" Taichi reached for Ichirou's face, curling his fingers around his cheek, smooth skin, tangling in his hair. "I don't get it. Please, Ichirou. Please..." He tugged the man's face down, towards him.
Almost involuntarily, Ichirou pressed in, the scent of Taichi surrounding him, memories cascading through him.
"You think by seducing me, I'll change my mind?" He asked, eyes squeezed shut.
Taichi tugged him closer, pressing a kiss to his mouth, upsidedown. Please. Please come back. He had to.
Ohhh. It was that kiss, those lips, the flavor that he still remembered, cinnamon and musk, and...
Ichirou moaned, and twisted around, pressing his mouth against Taichi's in a desperate, teeth clashing kiss.
Taichi tugged at him, coiling his hands, his fingers, into Ichirou's hair, pulling him down, arching up, desperate where his mission had left him languid, wanting where it had left him laughing. Ichirou, Ichirou, please, come back.
Ichirou was just trying to bury himself in Taichi, how he tasted of home, and oh he had missed him....
He desperately fumbled with the fastenings on his pants, shaking hands unable to undo them.
Taichi was already naked, and he tugged, pulled, helped with Ichirou's pants, getting him free with a growl, almost desperate, and he slid his hands around Ichirou's hips, pulling him down so he could grind, flesh on flesh, crying out in a needy keen.
Oh gods, it was the same rythm, and it was like nothing had changed, and Ichirou ground back, gasping, hips bucking against Taichi's.
Hot heated, and it was Ichirou, tasted like him, felt like him, and of course Ichirou'd come back. He had to. He would. Taichi clutched at him, desperate like he'd never been with him, but maybe it'd always been like this, wanting the man, wanting him again.
Maybe this was what grief was. He hadn't felt anything much, when he had been told Ichirou was dead, just rearranged his schedule, except for Wednesday nights, when he'd go out and sit on the rooftop and stare at the stars till the hour was up. Sex with all his other doms, all his other conquests, had contiued on in the same line. Nothing changed.
But now it was Ichirou again, touching him, sliding hands up his skin and making him squirm, writhe, under him, Ichirou, Ichirou - his hands rough and calloused and thinner than before but still the same.
Ichirou pulled back, hips still moving against Taichi's, tugging his off his shirt, carelessly tossing it to the side. He pulled his long hair out of his face, no longer worrying about hiding the scars, drinking in the sight of the man he'd never thought he'd see again.
"Taichi...."
Taichi stroked his thumb up Ichirou's face, over whorled skin, warm hand cupping his cheek and pulled him down again. "Ichirou. Ichi-sama." He ground up, against Taichi, desperate, something aching in him easing and then tightening again, and he wanted Ichirou. In him. Fucking him. Making it like before again, and now he didn't have to watch the stars alone, he could spend it in bed with Ichirou again.
"Taichi, Chi-chan..." Ichirou replied, leaning down, pressing in close, capturing Taichi's lips in s desperate kiss.
Missed you. Want you.
Love you..
It was... right. Everything was right again. Ichirou calling him that with a whispered fevour, and Taichi responded to his unspoken commands. Want. Wantwantwantneed, and he arched up, wrapping his legs around Ichirou's waist.
Could feel the warmth that meant Ichirou's love, and he still didn't know what to do with it, except offer himself up again, and again, and Ichirou would come back. And it would be the same again, Taichi playing at love and Ichirou loving him, and Nobu watching and Sado laughing and maybe Jintaro would fit in somewhere with cossetting and sweetness, and it was perfect.
Ichirou's hands roamed up and down Taichi's body, re-familiarizing himself with the planes and angles of the body that he used to spend hours exploring, discovering all those secret sensitive spots, all the little indosyncrasies of Taichi's body. His fingers brushed at his ribs, tickling at the fourth one, wondering if Taichi's body had changed as much as his had.
Taichi shuddered, arching up sharply, flushing, and moaning. "Ngn...!" Ichirou knew his body like... like only a dom did, and it had been so. So pleasant having him map it all out, and Ichirou touching him again was like lighting fires in him with every breath, to the point he was moaning, writhing under his touch. "Ich... ichi... ichi-sama, please... please..." His cock was hard. Just from these few seconds of it, and he was wanting Ichirou so much. Wanted him like he hadn't even cared about the target.
"Yes, yes..." Ichirou moaned, but he didn't move to fuck Taichi, he didn't want it to be over so quickly. Instead he slid down the other's body, trailing little kisses on the heat skin, nuzzling the hollow of his sharp hip. He deeply breathed in the familiar scent of musk, moaning softly, moving into the kiss the base of Tachi's cock.
Taichi cried out, bucking, twisting in the horribly soft sheets, gripping at them for a moment, to stop himself from yanking at his dom. Oh yes, he rmemebered NObu's lesson perfectly, and he could beg with his body, beg with need and want, but he couldn't try and make Ichirou do what he didn't want to.
But gods he watned... wanted...
And more and over and every week for the rest of the foreseeable future.
Ichirou moaned, and nuzzled at Taichi's shaft, tongue barely trailing at the underside, as his hands moved up and down his thighs, softly caressing, as if he couldn't get enough of the feel of Taichi's skin.
Taichi arched, feet pushing at the sheets, trying to get more of the touches. Wanting. Wanting this and overlaid was all of the memories of before, fresh and new and old and it was going to happen again. And again. And again and again and Taichi cried out in agonised need, "Please, Please, Ichi-sama, want you oh gods, I need you...!"
Ichirou groaned against Taichi's cock, placing tiny kisses, up and down his length, lapping at the pre-come beading at the tip of his cock. His fingers wrapped around the base, stroking lightly.
Taichi bucked, tightly, holding himself in, coiled, ready, wanting. "Please.... oh gods please, Ichi-sama, d-don't tease please!"
"Not teasing, enjoying myself." Ichirou whispered, "It's been so long...."
Taichi shuddered, quivering under the onslaught, soft whispered words across his skin and... "So long," he managed. It felt like yesterday. Like the last time Ichirou'd cradled his head against his chest and kissed him to sleep after a rough night of bondage. It felt just like yesterday. Taichi could remember it so clearly, feel it ghosting over his skin, how could Ichirou say it's been so long?
"Please... pleasepleaseplease..."
Ichirou just parted his lips, mouth sliding down Taichi's cock. He moaned, the taste achingly familar, as was the velvet skin on his tongue and lips.
Taichi cried out, choked, muffled as if he was gagged on just the air in the room suddenly grown hot and wet and damp and he wanted to scream with the aching, aching slowness.
They would have next week. Tomorrow. later to have it slow and sweet and gods his toes were curling in the sheets as he trembled with the need not to fuck up into Ichirou's mouth.
Ichirou hummed, purred around Taichi's length, tongue rubbed, curling around the rigid flesh. His hands fluttered over Taichi's torso, pressing, stroking, caressing all the special places.
All the places that made Taichi keen, cry out, all the buttons pressed at once, making him a writhing, needy mess, on the bed, and he was about to come. Nearly. Almost. But Ichirou wasn't letting him.
Ichirou hummed, and slid down as far as he could, mouth coaxing Taichi, wanting him to feel that ultimate, mind blowing pleasure.
Taichi shuddered, and then Ichirou stroked, and Taichi screamed as he came.
Ichirou sucked and swallowed, getting every last drop, before pulling off of Taichi's cock with wet pop. With a small sigh, he slid up Taichi's body, gently kissing him.
Taichi shuddered, kissing him back, moaning softly, arching slightly up against him. "mmm."
"I love you." Ichirou whispered. "I love you, love you..." It was something that he had never said out loud, more like an unspoken thing between the two of them. But now, Ichirou didn't care, he wanted to say the words, for Taichi to hear him, to change his mind, and then maybe, just maybe Taichi could find his heart, find it enough to love him back.
Taichi shuddered, curling his hands down Ichirou's shoulders. "I know," he whispered back, but even playing at it, pretending, he couldn't say it. It wasn't true, so he couldn't, not like this, not when it was just achingly real.
Ichirou took a deep breath and buried his nose in Tachi's neck, nuzzling kissing. He clung tight to Taichi, taking in deep breaths.
Taichi shivered, feeling the question pass in the air between them,and ran his hand dwon Ichirou's hair. "Ichi-sama," he murrmured, turning to press his cheek against it. "Ichi-sama..."
"Yes?" ichirou murmured shakily, pressing into Taichi.
"I..." Taichi wondered, sometimes, how come it was so easy to tease Nobu with the words, but they stopped, and never seemed to flow right with Ichirou.
Maybe it was because he knew the man wanted Taichi to mean it. And Taichi couldn't. An absolute proper sub would have been able to, but Taichi couldn't. No matter what, the words stuck in his throat.
"I want you, Ichi-sama."
Ah yes. Sex. Taichi could offer his body to Ichirou, and that was it. He could not have Taichi's sharp, flashing smile, nor his drawn out laugh. Only his body. Only sex.
"Want you too Chi-chan." He whispered back.
I'll take what I can get.
Taichi arched, again, pressing up, dampness between them, hooking his legs on either side of Ichirou's hips. His Ichi-sama wanted him. Want. Want, he could understand, and of course it'd mean he'd come back, Ichi-sama'd come back and everything'd be okay. Be the same. Be perfect.
Ichirou ground down, panting, eyes sliding half shut.
It meant that Taichi could dare to tug the man's face close against his mouth, ask for him wet, needy, squirming, even though his arousal was low, it was building again, just for Ichirou, the man was hard and wanting against him.
Want. Need. Ichirou.
Ichirou kissed Taichi desperately back, tugging the other man flush with his body, panting open mouthed against him, hands gripping at his hips.
Taichi's fingers tangled in Ichirou's hair, smoothing down his spine, rocked up against him, panting, wanting, keening. "Need... gods, Ichi-sama, need!"
"So do I, so do I...." Ichirou panted. He forced himself to pull back, just a little, but his hand twined with one of Taichi's.
"D-do they have lube here?"
"In the side-table," Taichi said, leaning up to nuzzle at Ichirou's collarbone. "Mm>"
Ichirou did not let go of Taichi's hand, as he quickly rooted through the drawer, withdrawing the tube, nearly panting in anticipation. He was going to feel Taichi's heat again, after he had forced himself to admit that it was never going to happen again, here it was. His hands were shaking as he flipped open the cap, forcing himself to let go of Taichi's hand so he could slick his fingers.
Taichi fell back onto his elbows, dropping his head back, groaning, loud, long, and fuck Ichirou was hard, so hard for him, and he wnated - htey both did, wanted each other like sex was going to go out of style.
"Ohh, Chi-chan, missed you, missed you..." Ichirou mumbled, sliding down, parting Taichi's lean thighs, slick fingers slipping up, circling his entrance.
Taichi groaned, arching, spreading his legs, wanting, offering. "Ichi-sama... fuck.. please, oh gods please, want you now...!'
Ichirou moaned in response, nuzzling at Taichi's hip as he pressed a single finger in.
Taichi gasped, tingling, tightening on him, reacting like he had to act previously. But this was no act. This was... this was...
It was his dom and however his doms wanted him, he'd do it, and Ichirou wanted him and Taichi wanted him back, and he wanted to give him everything.
"Ohh, Chi-chan." Ichirou moaned, and Taichi was just as hot and tight as he remembered. Biting down on the sharp hip, he slipped another finger in, curling them.
Taichi keened, bucking as the man's finger stroked up his prostate, and he shuddered, clenching on him, wanting. Needing. "Please... pleasee.. Ichi-sama, want you now."
"J-just a little more." Ichirou gasped, sliding a third finger in, ignoring his aching erection. "Not gonna hurt you..."
"Won't hurt me, oh gods..." Taichi keened, arching up, writhing in the sheets. "Please... please... Ichi-sama..."
Ichirou groaned then pulled back, because unable to ignore Taichi's pleading, he never could for long...His fingers fumbled with the tube, getting lube everywhere, and not caring. His slick fingers curled over his erection and he moaned as he slicked hard, hot flesh. With a shuddering breath, he hooked Taichi's knees over his elbows, spreading the other man wide, and slowly pushed in, dark lashes fluttering against his cheek, as he groaned, arching back, the slick heat slowly consuming him.
"F-fuck..." Taichi said, and it was almost worshipful, the way he quivered, pressing back, pushed open to accept his dom. "Ngn... Ichi-sama... Ichi... "
Ichirou paused for a moment, not moving, staring down at Taichi, drinking in the sight. His hand reached down, clasping the other man's again.
Taichi's fingers tightened on Ichirou's, and he arched, keening, whimpering. "Please... Oh gods please, fucking move, fuck me, take me again, oh god...!"
Ichirou moved, pulling out, thrusting back. His head lowered until there was a bare inch between their lips and he moaned, gasping at the tight heat.
"Ngn....Love you so much..."
Taichi arched, catching his mouth with his, swallowing his words as he moved with desperation. He didn't want to hear those words - they made him shiver and ache inside, because Ichirou never used to say it, and Taichi knew but hadn't known waht to do.
Sex, he understood, and he could give Ichirou anything else he wanted, anything but love, because Taichi didn't have a heart to love with, and he clawed dwon Ichirou's sides, whimpering.
Ichirou squeezed Taichi's hand harder, as his thrusts increased in pace.
Taichi shivered, arousal rocketting up with the increasingly hard, fast, thrusts, till his back feels scraped raw by the friction, and his voice is about to give out with "Ichi-sama, Ichi-sama!"
Ichirou leaned back down, pressing open mouthed kisses along Taichi's neck, not kissing his lips, because he missed hearing his name being called out like that, in that voice.
Taichi doesn't stop, doesn't stop crying out Ichirou's name, a syllable per thrust, and he is achingly hard now, and he could come just like this, after hours of it, if Ichirou wanted him to, and gods he'd ... he... he wanted...
And it'll be all good in the end.
Ichirou's cries were only slightly muffled against Taichi's neck, and they increased in pitch as he got closer and closer, the heat rising, the pleasure raising to almost unbearable levels. Fumbling, he reached between their rocking bodies, fingers curling around Taichi's cock.
Taichi keened, sharply, as Ichirou's fingers touched his heated flesh, and he bucked, hard, trembling. "Ngn.... Ichi... Ichi-samaa...."
Ichirou's cries had debased into mashed syllables that contained pieces of Taichi's name. His hand worked harder at Taichi's cock, as their bodies moved in that familiar rythym, his thrusts long and deep, with a slight pause when fully in.
It would have been hell, but it was exquisite, just Ichirou and him and Taichi was crying out, shaking with the effort of waiting, holding still so he'd come with Ichirou, but gods it was killing him.
Ichirou managed a couple more thrusts, before he lost complete control, thighs trembling, back stiffening as he came with a low cry, mouth pressed against other man's throat, tasting salt, musk, and Taichi.
Ichirou's spasming was what tripped Taichi off, and his cry was high, almost pained, as orgasm spilled from him with heat and oh fucking god pleasure.
Ichirou just lay on Taichi, panting softly, his long body covering the lean one beneath him.
"Ichi-sama," Taichi managed, hoarse, ragged, and stroked down the man's heaving ribs with his free hand. He nuzzled the man's jaw, smilign softly. "Let's get the tapes and leave?"
"Chi-chan." Ichirou said muzzlily, as his words were muffled by Taichi's warm, slightly damp skin.
Taichi laughed, a little ragged, softening the sharp, brightness, and tugged at Ichirou's hip. "Mou, Ichi-sama, we should go now. I promise my bed back at the inn's much better."
Taichi's words hurt, like a hot brand against his cheek, and unconsciously Ichirou reached up, fingers brushing against the scars on his cheek.
"I'm not coming back." He whispered.
"Ichi-sama," Taichi said, laughing after a small pause, "don't tease me, you know I don't like being teased." he tightened his fingers in Ichirou's hand. "C'mon. Let me up?" He wondered if he should tell the man that his bunk had been given to some skinny, somber, T&I guy he didn't really like, but he could always stay with Taichi - just like Shisui did with Kei, they were so cute - until they sorted out a bunk for Ichirou again.
"Taichi. Listen to me." Ichirou whispered. "Listen. I'm not coming back. I can't." He paused again, and whispered, "But I want you to come with me."
Taichi blinked. Stared. There was only so much one could think was a joke until it wasn't and then...
Everything just stilled.
"You're not coming back?" Why wouldn't Ichirou want to come back? "But... But I'm there. and. I'm here, and it's Konoha and... Ichi-sama, why not? Why can't you come back?"
He wasn't... Ichirou wanted him. He could tell. The man wanted him to come with him and Taichi would have followed without question, if it had been anything but preceded with 'i'm not coming back'.
Because Taichi couldn't leave Konoha. It was inconceivable, unthinkable; it hit a blank wall everytime he thought about it, and he just couldn't.
And that meant disobeying Ichirou, and it hurt.
"Please, Taichi." Ichirou whispered, "They don't care about us there. Ninja are just tools to be used then thrown away when broken. When we're like this, we can make our own decisions, follow our own path. It's lonely, at times, but if you were with me..."
"Ichi-sama..." Taichi's voice was shaky, his eyes wide. Something... he couldn't breathe. He couldn't. He had to disobey Ichirou, or leave Konoha, and it couldn't. He couldn't. It didn't make sense, it hurt so much, he was choking.
Ichirou wanted him to go with him. Taichi couldn't leave Konoha. It just... it was the Rules - Taichi couldn't disobey a Dom, Taichi couldn't leave Konoha, and it was... everything was breaking. He couldn't breathe.
He couldn't breathe.
"Taichi?" Ichirou whispered.
Taichi choked, his hands clinging, digging into Ichirou's. He had to break a Rule. He didn't know which one, and he couldn't tell which one to break, and it was... he couldn't... he couldn't ask Ichirou to rescind the order, because he couldn't - his place was to obey, but he couldn't obey Ichirou. He couldn't - but he had to.
Things were shattering apart.
Ichirou gripped back just as hard, kissing and nuzzling Taichi, trying to calm him down.
"There, there Chi-chan, it'll be alright..."
"It-it isn't!" Taichi managed to force out, gasping, his chest wasn't moving right, he couldn't breathe, his vision was going hazy. "I c-can't... c-can't... th-the Rules..."
Fuck, Taichi's rules, it always came down to the rules, the rigid structure that Taichi kept himself on.
"I asked you to break one, didn't I?"
Taichi managed a tight nod, not even having the breath to whimper, spasming tight and clinging, and gods, he couldn't. He couldn't...
Ichirou was quiet, more hesitantly asking.
"Could you break them....for me?"
"d-dunno w-which one to break!" Because either way, he'd be breaking a Rule, and it'd be for Ichirou, and oh god he couldn't breathe, couldn't think, and something is squeezing, inside, breaking him, twisting and snapping and he can't. he can't.
"Taichi..." Ichirou's hand fluttered at his side. Taichi was obviously hurting, but Ichirou couldn't let him go, he just couldn't...
Taichi wrenched to the side, and with a choked snarl, slammed a hand full of burning chakra to his other arm, snapping bone, charring skin.
He suddenly could breathe again, the agony concentrated on one spot. His mind was clear.
"I can't," he said, voice cool, despite the burning, burning screaming wrench in his arm. "I have to disobey."
"Taichi!!" Ichirou's eyes widened when he saw what other man did.
"What the hell are you doing to yourself!"
Taichi's fingers twitched - he could feel sweat running down his temples. But his mind was blazingly clear. All the agony was concentrated there, which meant that he could break a Rule. Easily.
"I can't go with you."
His arm twinged, and he managed not to gasp. Or pass out.
"No. Please, please." Ichirou whispered, angrily dashing the water that just had to spill over his eyes. "No."
He was going against a direct order. a Plea, even, and his arm hurt. It hurt so much that when Taichi breathed in, the air froze in his lungs, and he had to squeeze at the broken ends of bone till he could inhale again. "I can't. I can't obey you, I have to break the Rule and I w-wa..." but want had no place here and he couldn't obey both rules, so one had to break.
Just like his arm.
"Why can't you?"
"I can't leave Konoha," Taichi said, voice crisp, cold. His fingers were numb.
"Then that's it..." Ichirou said, almost numbly.
Taichi shuddered, and nodded.
Ichirou wasn't coming back, and Taichi had to break a rule.
He felt like he was dead.
"You...won't reconsider?" Ichirou whispered.
The air was so cold, and his arm burned. He thought he could smell charred skin. It'd make a huge, messy scar, unless they chopped off layers and regrew it, but he didn't know. He didn't want to think anymore.
His arm hurt.
"I can't."
And there it was. Ichirou knew that there was nothing that he could do or say to make Taichi come. He sighed slumping and angrily sniffed, as if he could force the hot, salty tears back, force them not to fall.
Taichi watched Ichirou's tears slowly track down his face, cold and distant inside, and he couldn't think of anything. He'd disobeyed his dom. he'd had to, or else he would have had to leave Konoha, leave Nobu, Jintaro, Sado, ANBU.
Like Kakashi. Only Kakashi was doing it for his sanity - which Taichi still didn't understand, but he thought if Kakashi had two such conflicting Rules, maybe that was why.
It would have been so much easier if Ichirou had asked him to just leave ANBU.
Ichirou dashed the tears from his eyes, and sniffed hard.
"Do you need to be healed?" He asked, voice only sounding hoarse, a last ditch effort to keep Taichi close just a little longer...
Taichi looked at his arm, the mess of oozing blood and fluid, bubbled skin, bones aching within. "... probably," he said, finally, evenly.
"I'm not very good, but I can at least get the bones healed." Ichirou offered softly.
Would Ichirou ask again? Because if he did, Taichi'd have to break his arm again, and how many times would he have to disobey his dom? He couldn't. It broke something inside him, small, distant, and he wished Nobu were here to tell him what to do. "I have to get the tapes," he said, equally soft, watching Ichirou's eyes.
"I....can't let you do that." Ichirou whispered. "They'll ask me about it, and..."
I have to, Taichi started to say, then bowed his head. He couldn't... It hurt too much to think of even trying to disobey another order, and so...
He hadn't failed a mission for years. Konoha wouldn't mind this one.
Taichi was going soon, Ichirou knew that, and he just couldn't let that happen, not now, not when he had just seen him again. He raised a lean hand, cupping the back of Taichi's head, pulling him in for a long, soft kiss.
Why couldn't Ichirou come back? Taichi wanted to ask, leaning into the kiss, ignoring the burning pain. He wanted his dom back. THere, he'd said it, want. He wanted... it would have been perfect, he knew. Nobu liked Ichirou. Sado'd respected him, as much as Sado respected anyone. Jintaro would have been able to learn from Ichirou. Or... or anything. Everything. Everythign would have been fine, including his arm.
Ichirou kissed back desperately, shaking almost. Pulling away, he whispered on soft lips.
"Oh gods, Chi-chan, please...please..."
Taichi whined, pained, his arm throbbing. No. No, he couldn't. He couldn't. Please don't order me to. Please don't because i would have to obey this time and then i'll break.
Ichirou heard the whine and stopped, pulling himself together.
He already broke his own arm. He thought dully. Don't push him anymore.
Taichi was watching him, eyes wide, pupils blown, and he couldn't... couldn't... He had disobeyed his dom and he didn't know what that would do to him. Nobu had been right to punish him then - he needed Nobu to punish him now. Because... oh gods the pain. He reached up to touch Ichirou's arm, fingers light,tracing, and finally resting on Ichirou's face. Where the scars were. Had that really changed him that much? Because he still felt like Ichirou, Taichi's dom. But Ichirou wouldn't have askedhim to leave, just like Nobu wouldn't have asked him to leave, and... and..
But Taichi couldn't leave a dom anymore than he could leave Konoha, and Ichirou was his. His dom.
A sickening sort of hope skyrocketed in Ichirou.
"Yes?"
No. No... Taichi bit his lip and looked away. It shattered something in him to say no to the hope, the command, the order.
But he couldn't go with Ichirou. He couldn't. "No." he said, so soft he almost couldn't hear it, and it didn't hurt, at all, in his chest. Where his heart would have been.
Ichirou's face fell, closing, turning as blank as he could force it. He got off of Taichi, sitting at the edge of the bed, staring at the pile of his clothes.
Sorry. Gods I'm sorry. But Taichi didn't say anything, remaining there, a loose sprawl on the bed, Ichirou's come slowly leaking out to stain the sheets and Taichi wondered, whether the stories were true, about heartache and pain, because he felt all the pain in his arm but none of the heartache, just a blank.
Ichirou did not move, did not speak. Just sat there, staring, numb. Later, he figured, he would feel pain. But right now he had blanked out, and there was nothing.
Taichi finally winced - his arm was hurting badly enough that he had to force himself still, quivering. Glanced at Ichirou, and exhaled again. Ichirou was leaving. Ichirou was leaving and the last command he'd given him that Taichi could obey was to let him take the tapes, and ...
it wasn't really failing Konoha, just failing one mission - he'd barely get a slap on the wrist for it, what with the injury. and the target wasn't all that important, really.
Just...
Stop teasing me. Stop acting like you're going to change your mind, and stay with me. Ichirou curled tighter around himself.
"Ichi-sama," Taichi said, letting pain bleed into his voice. "Either you're going to heal my arm, or I have to leave."
the longer he stayed, the more likely Ichirou would give him an order he would have to obey and then.
Right, right, of course.
Ichirou turned around, his fingers lightly brushing on Taichi's bruise and discolored arm, forcing charka in, forcing bone to knit back together.
The last time I'll touch him.
Taichi shuddered, jerking slightly, Ichirou's inelegant and frankly clumsy method of chakra healing making it hurt almost as bad as breaking the bones, but marrow and bone knitted together, till only it was a bad bruise - if you discounted the burns.
Ichirou's fingers paused on Taichi's arm, reluctant to let go.
Taichi continued to lie there, letting his dom touch him, hold him. "You could come back," he said, softly. "You could come back and I'll even leave ANBU if you want me to."
Ichirou's eyes slid shut, as he thought of it, and considered it briefly.
No. They left me to die. To be tortured.
"I...can't."
And that was that. Taichi sat up slowly, still touching Ichirou's face. "Then I have to go."
And maybe they'll meet again. If... If... Ichirou could always change his mind. doms had the freedom to do that.
"Alright." Ichirou whispered, leaning in for one last kiss, trying to ignore the terrible ache in his chest.
it tasted salty. Salty and long and burned in his chest, and finally, finally Taichi had to break the kiss and leave.
It was a very long walk home.
Ichirou did not leave the room for a long, long time, buried in the sheets that still had the faint smell of Taichi on them. He lay there, dry eyed and staring, wishing and wanting.
Part 2
Summary: When someone leaves, is hurt and betrayed, who really is the traitor, and who is really left behind? A Taichi Backstory, and a glimpse at the man he is. By drelfina (Taichi) and FC (everyone else. >.>)
The One Who Left Me Behind (part 1)
Simple mission, this time. Not too far from home - Taichi didn't need a spotter or handler for this; the man was known to be not violent, and they just needed to have him be spotted with a prostitute. He wouldn't want it known to his wife or his wife's family, so that was a nice perfect little setup to use.
The target walked into room, humming in appreciation, eyes slowly running up and down Taichi's body.
"Pretty. What's your name?"
"Kira," Taichi purred, sitting up, letting the yukata smooth down over a shoulder. "Tanaka-saaan, want to come over here?"
The girl was very good, he noted idly, happy that his staff had taken their time.
"Sure." The man murmured, walking over.
Taichi cooed at the target, knowing full well that the cameras were running. She waited till the man was close to the bed, and she slid over, opening her legs to frame his hip over the edge. "Mou, Tanaka-saaan."
"Yes, you pretty thing?" He murmured, blunt fingers skimming over Taichi's cheek, sliding down the slender length of her neck, slowly pushing the shoulder of the yukata lower.
"It's cold~" Taichi arched up, purring as the man's fingers smoothed down her back. Smooth, soft hand, utterly not ninja. Hm.
"Is it?" Tanaka murmured, fingers moving to Taichi's front, thumb rubbing over a pebbled nipple. "I see."
Taichi groaned, long, langrous, and reached up to tug the man's shoulders down. "I aaaam... Tanaka-san should do something about it, mm?"
"Perhaps I will." the man murmured, pushing the other shoulder of the yukata down, exposing Taichi's small, but pert breasts.
Taichi shivered, a long, slow movement. "mooou. You should, Tanaka-san... It was so cold here, alone, waiting for you....." She pressed up, pushing her breasts against his hips, his waist. "Tanaka-saaaan..."
"I see the pretty girl is impatient." Tanaka murmured. His soft fingers tugged at her obi, the silken material falling open, revealing a neatly trimmed red triangle of coarse hair, the soft curves of slim hips, and long slender legs.
"Natural red. I'm surprised."
"Mooou, Tanaka-san..." Taichi ducked her head, though she wasn't blushing. "You shouldn't say things like that~"
"Mmmm, and why not?" Tanaka murmured, sliding a hand along a length of creamy white leg, lift it up, kissing the inside of her ankle.
Taichi shivered, moaning, hooking her other leg around his waist. The way Tanaka was holding her, he was spreading her open too. Pervert. "Because it's not polite~"
"Oh?" He said with a soft purr, looking down, getting a good look of her moist pinkness. He smirked a little, seeing a flash of silver. His blunt finger pushed up the hood of her clit, brushing against the silver barbell pressed against her pink skin.
Taichi's breath caught in her chest, heaving against his hips. "aaaah, Tanaka-saaaan..." She squirmed a little, flexing slightly, knwoign he could see it.
Tanaka groaned softly, heat curling in him. His finger drew a line from her clit, down her slit to her entrance.
"mou..." Taichi squirmed, gasping and moaning loudly. It wasn't much, really, but the point here was to be as obvious, loud, and whorish as possible without looking fake.
Taichi was VERY good at this.
Tanaka pushed Taichi's further back on the bed, untangling her legs from his waist, sliding onto the bed.
"How about you undress me, Kira."
Taichi moaned, arching, and slithering under the man and tugged at his belt, his fly. "Tanaka-san, you're being lazy?"
"Maybe a little." He replied, one hand sliding down Taichi's flank, cupping her ass.
Taichi hummed, undoing his pants deftly, and pushing it down over his hips, and smoothed her palms up his stomach, over his abs. "Oh, Tanaka-san, you're so strong~ and biiig."
"Mmm," the man murmured, smiling slightly at the flattery. His hand slid up her belly, up to her chest, cupping a breast.
She purred, grinding into his hand, even as one of her hands moved down to fist his cock. "Oh, tanaka-sama~"
The older man groaned, arching up, his hand on her slipping a little, his breath starting to quicken a little.
He was an old man - heh. He would get spent fast, and the blackmail would be quick and dirty. Maybe another ten minutes.
Taichi cooed at him, and tickled at his balls. "What do you want, Tanaka-sama?"
Tanaka groaned, arching up, panting slightly.
"Want you to ride me."
Taichi giggled at him, andpushed lightly at his shoulder. "Then turn over, and I'll ride you like a horse, Tanaka-sama~"
Tanaka's breath hitched, and he rolled over, hands gripping at Taichi's smooth hips, tugging her over, so she was straddled over him. With a low moan he slipped his hand down, cupping her hot, wet pussy, large fingers teasing at her entrance.
Taichi moaned, writhing against him. "Oh yes... yes... push into my pussy, Tanaka-saaaama..."
Slowly, Tanaka pushed two into her, exploring her wet heat.
"Ngn....!" Taichi moaned, rocking her hips against him. "Oh yeah... oh yeah...!"
With a hitched breath, Tanaka rubbed his thumb against her clit, his fingers slowly thrusting into her.
"Mmm, Tanaka-saaan..." Taichi squirmed, moaning wantonly. "Want your cock in me, Tanaka-sama..."
"Of course." the man gasped, tugging his fingers out, grabbing her hips, smearing her juices on her pale skin. With a low groan, he tugged her down, slowly pushing into her.
"oh yes... yes..." Taichi moaned, loud and wanton, as she pressed down, and started to rock, squeeze on the man. "Faster... more... fuck me hard, Tanaka-san!"
"haaa..." Tanaka's head tilted back as he thrust up, burying his cock deep in her pussy, her wet walls clenching and unclenching around him.
Taichi groaned, breathing hard. Tanaka was going to come soon. soo soon, and then it'd be over. She couldn't wait to see his face...
She rocked against him, moaning, fucking herself on him.
Tanaka ran his soft hands up and down her body, hands eating up her soft curves. Grunting and moaning, he fucked harder into her tight body, nearly every nerve in his body screaming with the sensation.
Taichi purred, squeezing at him. "Gonna come," she gasped, even thought it was hardly near the case. But it didn't matter- because female orgasms were so much easier to fake.
Tanaka was rapidly approaching his own limit without faking it. With a low moan, he gripped hard at Taichi's hips, pulling down while he thrust up, coming after a few thrusts, shaking, and bucking.
Taichi moaned, squeezing down on the man, shuddering a little, watching him, feeling the warmth gush into him.
Tanaka fell back, gasping raggedly.
Taichi purred, sitting up, pulling off him and stretching. "Tanaka-san~" she started, about to slide off the bed and show him one of the video cameras, when the door opened.
Ichirou had been in to check, fairly sure that Tanaka should be done by now. He stopped short when he saw the whore on top of him. While it wasn't the gender he was used to, the flashing brown eyes, and red hair were unmistakable.
"Taichi?"
Taichi froze at the voice. The unmistakeable chakra signature. "Ichi..." He bit his lip a moment too late.
He'd blame the shock, after.
Mostly because... Ichirou was dead. Or had been presumed dead.
Tanaka, still breathless, looked at Ichirou.
"What the hell is going on....?"
Ichirou raked his hand through his long hair, the scars twisting across his half his face visible for a moment, before the long black hair fell back into place.
"That's no whore, Tanaka-san. That's a nin from Konoha, Hirato Taichi."
Taichi still stared at Ichirou. It was him, except for the scars. For a moment, the mission faded, the target faded from his awareness, and all he could see was Ichirou. Almost the same as what he last rmemebered. Except for the twisting, swirling scars.
"Shit." Tanaka scrambled away, quickly jerking his clothes on. He paused, once he was safely behind Ichirou.
"....You called her Taichi, a man's name."
"That's because he is." Ichirou replied carelessly. "Take the henge down, Taichi."
Taichi obeyed, the kai snapping through hsi fingers before he'd even realised it, Tanaka's jizz oozing slowly down his thighs. ".. Ichirou..." He wasn't dead.
Tanaka hissed, recoiling.
"What the fuck...."
"Tanaka-san." Ichirou said coolly, stemming the tide. "Get out of here, you were obviously set up. I'll check the room, and call back-up, you just get back, alright?"
Tanaka nodded, hurrying from the room.
"W-wait..." Taichi sat up, tensing, about to go after the man. Shit, the target was getting away!
"Taichi." Ichirou said, noting how Taichi had followed his earlier order. "You stay right there."
Taichi froze, automatically, and then the target was gone, and the mission was fucked, he should get out of here before more guards came... but Ichirou'd said for him to stay.
But Ichirou had been dead.
But he wasn't.
So that meant he was missing-nin.
"Taichi." Ichirou said, approaching the other man, sitting on the bed. "It's been a while."
"... you're missing-nin," Taichi said, eyes wide, pieces slowly clicking into place. "Why didn't you come back?"
"Why should I, when my team left me, bleeding in some god forsaken territory, ready to be picked off by the locals there?"
"They said you were dead," Taichi said, and it sounded like a broken record. "You.. the target got away!"
"They shouldn't have left me!" Ichirou shouted, old anguish resurfacing.
"But they said you were dead, and... and.. you can come back, Ichirou," Taichi said, leaning forward, reaching to touch the man's hand. "come back with me. Or rather, help me get my target, then come back."
It felt strange, to have a sort of... hope flare.
Ichirou's hand darted out, grabbing Taichi's wrist and twisted.
"Don't pull that shit on me, Taichi."
Taichi cried out, flipped over onto his back. "I-ichirou, I don't... I'm not trying anything... come back..."
"No." Ichirou hissed, leaning in. "Why should I risk my life for a village that doesn't even give a shit about me." His dark hair fell in a curtain around them, giving Taichi a good look of his scars.
Ichirou used to be handsome. Almost pretty. The scars didn't really change anything - he was still Ichirou. "They would have gone back for you if they'd known," Taichi said, voice small, eyes wide. "Please, Ichirou. You're... You're still my dom." Because if the man wasn't dead, then he could come back. Things would go back to the way they were.
"Oh, I am?"
Taichi nodded, eyes wide. "You're not traitor. Please, you can come back..."
"I don't want to go back."
How could Ichirou not want to come back? It baffled Taichi - it was inconcievable. "Please?" Every second he was here, pinned solely by the grip of his dom, his target was getting away. But it didn't matter - the cameras were still running, all he would have to do was stop them and take the footage, and send a copy to the target later. It didn't matter.
Ichirou mattered. And Ichirou had to come back. Of course he would come back.
"This isn't some matter you can try to change by batting your eyes at me, sucking my cock, or using the thousands of other tricks you know from seduction." Ichirou said coldly.
Taichi bit his lip. Ichirou'd been rarely cold with him. "Please," he said again, softly, pleadingly, tugging at the grip Ichirou had on his wrist, reaching with his other hand to try and touch the man's chin. "Please, no one will care, you could come back. It'd be the same as before. Please."
Ichirou jerked away.
"It won't be. I've changed."
"You're still Ichirou." Taich leaned up, managed to stroke his jaw. "Please... please, Ichirou. It's... you don't know but Kakashi's leaving ANBU and I've got a cute rookie dom, and Nobu likes him, I'm sure you'll like him, please, Ichirou."
"Fucking hell, Taichi." Ichirou snarled. "You want me to go back,and pretend it never happened? Go back to ANBU, to you?"
Taichi looked at him, perplexed and worried and just... why wouldn't he? Whywouldn't Ichirou want to? "Why not?"
"I don't even know why I bother." Ichirou snapped. "You won't understand no matter what I say."
Taichi made a soft noise, almost like he'd been hit. Or scolded. "I don't... please. why can't...?"
"What? You want me to go back? Go to back vanilla sex Mondays, bondage Wednesdays? A nice fucking regular schedule, so you won't have to deal with change?" Ichirou shook with anger, and finally settled for striking Taichi across the face.
Taichi whimpered at the strike, didn't try to avoid it. "It doesn't have to be on a schedule, if you don't want it to be!"
"Fuck, Taichi! That's not the fucking point!"
"I don't get it then!" Taichi reached for Ichirou's face, curling his fingers around his cheek, smooth skin, tangling in his hair. "I don't get it. Please, Ichirou. Please..." He tugged the man's face down, towards him.
Almost involuntarily, Ichirou pressed in, the scent of Taichi surrounding him, memories cascading through him.
"You think by seducing me, I'll change my mind?" He asked, eyes squeezed shut.
Taichi tugged him closer, pressing a kiss to his mouth, upsidedown. Please. Please come back. He had to.
Ohhh. It was that kiss, those lips, the flavor that he still remembered, cinnamon and musk, and...
Ichirou moaned, and twisted around, pressing his mouth against Taichi's in a desperate, teeth clashing kiss.
Taichi tugged at him, coiling his hands, his fingers, into Ichirou's hair, pulling him down, arching up, desperate where his mission had left him languid, wanting where it had left him laughing. Ichirou, Ichirou, please, come back.
Ichirou was just trying to bury himself in Taichi, how he tasted of home, and oh he had missed him....
He desperately fumbled with the fastenings on his pants, shaking hands unable to undo them.
Taichi was already naked, and he tugged, pulled, helped with Ichirou's pants, getting him free with a growl, almost desperate, and he slid his hands around Ichirou's hips, pulling him down so he could grind, flesh on flesh, crying out in a needy keen.
Oh gods, it was the same rythm, and it was like nothing had changed, and Ichirou ground back, gasping, hips bucking against Taichi's.
Hot heated, and it was Ichirou, tasted like him, felt like him, and of course Ichirou'd come back. He had to. He would. Taichi clutched at him, desperate like he'd never been with him, but maybe it'd always been like this, wanting the man, wanting him again.
Maybe this was what grief was. He hadn't felt anything much, when he had been told Ichirou was dead, just rearranged his schedule, except for Wednesday nights, when he'd go out and sit on the rooftop and stare at the stars till the hour was up. Sex with all his other doms, all his other conquests, had contiued on in the same line. Nothing changed.
But now it was Ichirou again, touching him, sliding hands up his skin and making him squirm, writhe, under him, Ichirou, Ichirou - his hands rough and calloused and thinner than before but still the same.
Ichirou pulled back, hips still moving against Taichi's, tugging his off his shirt, carelessly tossing it to the side. He pulled his long hair out of his face, no longer worrying about hiding the scars, drinking in the sight of the man he'd never thought he'd see again.
"Taichi...."
Taichi stroked his thumb up Ichirou's face, over whorled skin, warm hand cupping his cheek and pulled him down again. "Ichirou. Ichi-sama." He ground up, against Taichi, desperate, something aching in him easing and then tightening again, and he wanted Ichirou. In him. Fucking him. Making it like before again, and now he didn't have to watch the stars alone, he could spend it in bed with Ichirou again.
"Taichi, Chi-chan..." Ichirou replied, leaning down, pressing in close, capturing Taichi's lips in s desperate kiss.
Missed you. Want you.
Love you..
It was... right. Everything was right again. Ichirou calling him that with a whispered fevour, and Taichi responded to his unspoken commands. Want. Wantwantwantneed, and he arched up, wrapping his legs around Ichirou's waist.
Could feel the warmth that meant Ichirou's love, and he still didn't know what to do with it, except offer himself up again, and again, and Ichirou would come back. And it would be the same again, Taichi playing at love and Ichirou loving him, and Nobu watching and Sado laughing and maybe Jintaro would fit in somewhere with cossetting and sweetness, and it was perfect.
Ichirou's hands roamed up and down Taichi's body, re-familiarizing himself with the planes and angles of the body that he used to spend hours exploring, discovering all those secret sensitive spots, all the little indosyncrasies of Taichi's body. His fingers brushed at his ribs, tickling at the fourth one, wondering if Taichi's body had changed as much as his had.
Taichi shuddered, arching up sharply, flushing, and moaning. "Ngn...!" Ichirou knew his body like... like only a dom did, and it had been so. So pleasant having him map it all out, and Ichirou touching him again was like lighting fires in him with every breath, to the point he was moaning, writhing under his touch. "Ich... ichi... ichi-sama, please... please..." His cock was hard. Just from these few seconds of it, and he was wanting Ichirou so much. Wanted him like he hadn't even cared about the target.
"Yes, yes..." Ichirou moaned, but he didn't move to fuck Taichi, he didn't want it to be over so quickly. Instead he slid down the other's body, trailing little kisses on the heat skin, nuzzling the hollow of his sharp hip. He deeply breathed in the familiar scent of musk, moaning softly, moving into the kiss the base of Tachi's cock.
Taichi cried out, bucking, twisting in the horribly soft sheets, gripping at them for a moment, to stop himself from yanking at his dom. Oh yes, he rmemebered NObu's lesson perfectly, and he could beg with his body, beg with need and want, but he couldn't try and make Ichirou do what he didn't want to.
But gods he watned... wanted...
And more and over and every week for the rest of the foreseeable future.
Ichirou moaned, and nuzzled at Taichi's shaft, tongue barely trailing at the underside, as his hands moved up and down his thighs, softly caressing, as if he couldn't get enough of the feel of Taichi's skin.
Taichi arched, feet pushing at the sheets, trying to get more of the touches. Wanting. Wanting this and overlaid was all of the memories of before, fresh and new and old and it was going to happen again. And again. And again and again and Taichi cried out in agonised need, "Please, Please, Ichi-sama, want you oh gods, I need you...!"
Ichirou groaned against Taichi's cock, placing tiny kisses, up and down his length, lapping at the pre-come beading at the tip of his cock. His fingers wrapped around the base, stroking lightly.
Taichi bucked, tightly, holding himself in, coiled, ready, wanting. "Please.... oh gods please, Ichi-sama, d-don't tease please!"
"Not teasing, enjoying myself." Ichirou whispered, "It's been so long...."
Taichi shuddered, quivering under the onslaught, soft whispered words across his skin and... "So long," he managed. It felt like yesterday. Like the last time Ichirou'd cradled his head against his chest and kissed him to sleep after a rough night of bondage. It felt just like yesterday. Taichi could remember it so clearly, feel it ghosting over his skin, how could Ichirou say it's been so long?
"Please... pleasepleaseplease..."
Ichirou just parted his lips, mouth sliding down Taichi's cock. He moaned, the taste achingly familar, as was the velvet skin on his tongue and lips.
Taichi cried out, choked, muffled as if he was gagged on just the air in the room suddenly grown hot and wet and damp and he wanted to scream with the aching, aching slowness.
They would have next week. Tomorrow. later to have it slow and sweet and gods his toes were curling in the sheets as he trembled with the need not to fuck up into Ichirou's mouth.
Ichirou hummed, purred around Taichi's length, tongue rubbed, curling around the rigid flesh. His hands fluttered over Taichi's torso, pressing, stroking, caressing all the special places.
All the places that made Taichi keen, cry out, all the buttons pressed at once, making him a writhing, needy mess, on the bed, and he was about to come. Nearly. Almost. But Ichirou wasn't letting him.
Ichirou hummed, and slid down as far as he could, mouth coaxing Taichi, wanting him to feel that ultimate, mind blowing pleasure.
Taichi shuddered, and then Ichirou stroked, and Taichi screamed as he came.
Ichirou sucked and swallowed, getting every last drop, before pulling off of Taichi's cock with wet pop. With a small sigh, he slid up Taichi's body, gently kissing him.
Taichi shuddered, kissing him back, moaning softly, arching slightly up against him. "mmm."
"I love you." Ichirou whispered. "I love you, love you..." It was something that he had never said out loud, more like an unspoken thing between the two of them. But now, Ichirou didn't care, he wanted to say the words, for Taichi to hear him, to change his mind, and then maybe, just maybe Taichi could find his heart, find it enough to love him back.
Taichi shuddered, curling his hands down Ichirou's shoulders. "I know," he whispered back, but even playing at it, pretending, he couldn't say it. It wasn't true, so he couldn't, not like this, not when it was just achingly real.
Ichirou took a deep breath and buried his nose in Tachi's neck, nuzzling kissing. He clung tight to Taichi, taking in deep breaths.
Taichi shivered, feeling the question pass in the air between them,and ran his hand dwon Ichirou's hair. "Ichi-sama," he murrmured, turning to press his cheek against it. "Ichi-sama..."
"Yes?" ichirou murmured shakily, pressing into Taichi.
"I..." Taichi wondered, sometimes, how come it was so easy to tease Nobu with the words, but they stopped, and never seemed to flow right with Ichirou.
Maybe it was because he knew the man wanted Taichi to mean it. And Taichi couldn't. An absolute proper sub would have been able to, but Taichi couldn't. No matter what, the words stuck in his throat.
"I want you, Ichi-sama."
Ah yes. Sex. Taichi could offer his body to Ichirou, and that was it. He could not have Taichi's sharp, flashing smile, nor his drawn out laugh. Only his body. Only sex.
"Want you too Chi-chan." He whispered back.
I'll take what I can get.
Taichi arched, again, pressing up, dampness between them, hooking his legs on either side of Ichirou's hips. His Ichi-sama wanted him. Want. Want, he could understand, and of course it'd mean he'd come back, Ichi-sama'd come back and everything'd be okay. Be the same. Be perfect.
Ichirou ground down, panting, eyes sliding half shut.
It meant that Taichi could dare to tug the man's face close against his mouth, ask for him wet, needy, squirming, even though his arousal was low, it was building again, just for Ichirou, the man was hard and wanting against him.
Want. Need. Ichirou.
Ichirou kissed Taichi desperately back, tugging the other man flush with his body, panting open mouthed against him, hands gripping at his hips.
Taichi's fingers tangled in Ichirou's hair, smoothing down his spine, rocked up against him, panting, wanting, keening. "Need... gods, Ichi-sama, need!"
"So do I, so do I...." Ichirou panted. He forced himself to pull back, just a little, but his hand twined with one of Taichi's.
"D-do they have lube here?"
"In the side-table," Taichi said, leaning up to nuzzle at Ichirou's collarbone. "Mm>"
Ichirou did not let go of Taichi's hand, as he quickly rooted through the drawer, withdrawing the tube, nearly panting in anticipation. He was going to feel Taichi's heat again, after he had forced himself to admit that it was never going to happen again, here it was. His hands were shaking as he flipped open the cap, forcing himself to let go of Taichi's hand so he could slick his fingers.
Taichi fell back onto his elbows, dropping his head back, groaning, loud, long, and fuck Ichirou was hard, so hard for him, and he wnated - htey both did, wanted each other like sex was going to go out of style.
"Ohh, Chi-chan, missed you, missed you..." Ichirou mumbled, sliding down, parting Taichi's lean thighs, slick fingers slipping up, circling his entrance.
Taichi groaned, arching, spreading his legs, wanting, offering. "Ichi-sama... fuck.. please, oh gods please, want you now...!'
Ichirou moaned in response, nuzzling at Taichi's hip as he pressed a single finger in.
Taichi gasped, tingling, tightening on him, reacting like he had to act previously. But this was no act. This was... this was...
It was his dom and however his doms wanted him, he'd do it, and Ichirou wanted him and Taichi wanted him back, and he wanted to give him everything.
"Ohh, Chi-chan." Ichirou moaned, and Taichi was just as hot and tight as he remembered. Biting down on the sharp hip, he slipped another finger in, curling them.
Taichi keened, bucking as the man's finger stroked up his prostate, and he shuddered, clenching on him, wanting. Needing. "Please... pleasee.. Ichi-sama, want you now."
"J-just a little more." Ichirou gasped, sliding a third finger in, ignoring his aching erection. "Not gonna hurt you..."
"Won't hurt me, oh gods..." Taichi keened, arching up, writhing in the sheets. "Please... please... Ichi-sama..."
Ichirou groaned then pulled back, because unable to ignore Taichi's pleading, he never could for long...His fingers fumbled with the tube, getting lube everywhere, and not caring. His slick fingers curled over his erection and he moaned as he slicked hard, hot flesh. With a shuddering breath, he hooked Taichi's knees over his elbows, spreading the other man wide, and slowly pushed in, dark lashes fluttering against his cheek, as he groaned, arching back, the slick heat slowly consuming him.
"F-fuck..." Taichi said, and it was almost worshipful, the way he quivered, pressing back, pushed open to accept his dom. "Ngn... Ichi-sama... Ichi... "
Ichirou paused for a moment, not moving, staring down at Taichi, drinking in the sight. His hand reached down, clasping the other man's again.
Taichi's fingers tightened on Ichirou's, and he arched, keening, whimpering. "Please... Oh gods please, fucking move, fuck me, take me again, oh god...!"
Ichirou moved, pulling out, thrusting back. His head lowered until there was a bare inch between their lips and he moaned, gasping at the tight heat.
"Ngn....Love you so much..."
Taichi arched, catching his mouth with his, swallowing his words as he moved with desperation. He didn't want to hear those words - they made him shiver and ache inside, because Ichirou never used to say it, and Taichi knew but hadn't known waht to do.
Sex, he understood, and he could give Ichirou anything else he wanted, anything but love, because Taichi didn't have a heart to love with, and he clawed dwon Ichirou's sides, whimpering.
Ichirou squeezed Taichi's hand harder, as his thrusts increased in pace.
Taichi shivered, arousal rocketting up with the increasingly hard, fast, thrusts, till his back feels scraped raw by the friction, and his voice is about to give out with "Ichi-sama, Ichi-sama!"
Ichirou leaned back down, pressing open mouthed kisses along Taichi's neck, not kissing his lips, because he missed hearing his name being called out like that, in that voice.
Taichi doesn't stop, doesn't stop crying out Ichirou's name, a syllable per thrust, and he is achingly hard now, and he could come just like this, after hours of it, if Ichirou wanted him to, and gods he'd ... he... he wanted...
And it'll be all good in the end.
Ichirou's cries were only slightly muffled against Taichi's neck, and they increased in pitch as he got closer and closer, the heat rising, the pleasure raising to almost unbearable levels. Fumbling, he reached between their rocking bodies, fingers curling around Taichi's cock.
Taichi keened, sharply, as Ichirou's fingers touched his heated flesh, and he bucked, hard, trembling. "Ngn.... Ichi... Ichi-samaa...."
Ichirou's cries had debased into mashed syllables that contained pieces of Taichi's name. His hand worked harder at Taichi's cock, as their bodies moved in that familiar rythym, his thrusts long and deep, with a slight pause when fully in.
It would have been hell, but it was exquisite, just Ichirou and him and Taichi was crying out, shaking with the effort of waiting, holding still so he'd come with Ichirou, but gods it was killing him.
Ichirou managed a couple more thrusts, before he lost complete control, thighs trembling, back stiffening as he came with a low cry, mouth pressed against other man's throat, tasting salt, musk, and Taichi.
Ichirou's spasming was what tripped Taichi off, and his cry was high, almost pained, as orgasm spilled from him with heat and oh fucking god pleasure.
Ichirou just lay on Taichi, panting softly, his long body covering the lean one beneath him.
"Ichi-sama," Taichi managed, hoarse, ragged, and stroked down the man's heaving ribs with his free hand. He nuzzled the man's jaw, smilign softly. "Let's get the tapes and leave?"
"Chi-chan." Ichirou said muzzlily, as his words were muffled by Taichi's warm, slightly damp skin.
Taichi laughed, a little ragged, softening the sharp, brightness, and tugged at Ichirou's hip. "Mou, Ichi-sama, we should go now. I promise my bed back at the inn's much better."
Taichi's words hurt, like a hot brand against his cheek, and unconsciously Ichirou reached up, fingers brushing against the scars on his cheek.
"I'm not coming back." He whispered.
"Ichi-sama," Taichi said, laughing after a small pause, "don't tease me, you know I don't like being teased." he tightened his fingers in Ichirou's hand. "C'mon. Let me up?" He wondered if he should tell the man that his bunk had been given to some skinny, somber, T&I guy he didn't really like, but he could always stay with Taichi - just like Shisui did with Kei, they were so cute - until they sorted out a bunk for Ichirou again.
"Taichi. Listen to me." Ichirou whispered. "Listen. I'm not coming back. I can't." He paused again, and whispered, "But I want you to come with me."
Taichi blinked. Stared. There was only so much one could think was a joke until it wasn't and then...
Everything just stilled.
"You're not coming back?" Why wouldn't Ichirou want to come back? "But... But I'm there. and. I'm here, and it's Konoha and... Ichi-sama, why not? Why can't you come back?"
He wasn't... Ichirou wanted him. He could tell. The man wanted him to come with him and Taichi would have followed without question, if it had been anything but preceded with 'i'm not coming back'.
Because Taichi couldn't leave Konoha. It was inconceivable, unthinkable; it hit a blank wall everytime he thought about it, and he just couldn't.
And that meant disobeying Ichirou, and it hurt.
"Please, Taichi." Ichirou whispered, "They don't care about us there. Ninja are just tools to be used then thrown away when broken. When we're like this, we can make our own decisions, follow our own path. It's lonely, at times, but if you were with me..."
"Ichi-sama..." Taichi's voice was shaky, his eyes wide. Something... he couldn't breathe. He couldn't. He had to disobey Ichirou, or leave Konoha, and it couldn't. He couldn't. It didn't make sense, it hurt so much, he was choking.
Ichirou wanted him to go with him. Taichi couldn't leave Konoha. It just... it was the Rules - Taichi couldn't disobey a Dom, Taichi couldn't leave Konoha, and it was... everything was breaking. He couldn't breathe.
He couldn't breathe.
"Taichi?" Ichirou whispered.
Taichi choked, his hands clinging, digging into Ichirou's. He had to break a Rule. He didn't know which one, and he couldn't tell which one to break, and it was... he couldn't... he couldn't ask Ichirou to rescind the order, because he couldn't - his place was to obey, but he couldn't obey Ichirou. He couldn't - but he had to.
Things were shattering apart.
Ichirou gripped back just as hard, kissing and nuzzling Taichi, trying to calm him down.
"There, there Chi-chan, it'll be alright..."
"It-it isn't!" Taichi managed to force out, gasping, his chest wasn't moving right, he couldn't breathe, his vision was going hazy. "I c-can't... c-can't... th-the Rules..."
Fuck, Taichi's rules, it always came down to the rules, the rigid structure that Taichi kept himself on.
"I asked you to break one, didn't I?"
Taichi managed a tight nod, not even having the breath to whimper, spasming tight and clinging, and gods, he couldn't. He couldn't...
Ichirou was quiet, more hesitantly asking.
"Could you break them....for me?"
"d-dunno w-which one to break!" Because either way, he'd be breaking a Rule, and it'd be for Ichirou, and oh god he couldn't breathe, couldn't think, and something is squeezing, inside, breaking him, twisting and snapping and he can't. he can't.
"Taichi..." Ichirou's hand fluttered at his side. Taichi was obviously hurting, but Ichirou couldn't let him go, he just couldn't...
Taichi wrenched to the side, and with a choked snarl, slammed a hand full of burning chakra to his other arm, snapping bone, charring skin.
He suddenly could breathe again, the agony concentrated on one spot. His mind was clear.
"I can't," he said, voice cool, despite the burning, burning screaming wrench in his arm. "I have to disobey."
"Taichi!!" Ichirou's eyes widened when he saw what other man did.
"What the hell are you doing to yourself!"
Taichi's fingers twitched - he could feel sweat running down his temples. But his mind was blazingly clear. All the agony was concentrated there, which meant that he could break a Rule. Easily.
"I can't go with you."
His arm twinged, and he managed not to gasp. Or pass out.
"No. Please, please." Ichirou whispered, angrily dashing the water that just had to spill over his eyes. "No."
He was going against a direct order. a Plea, even, and his arm hurt. It hurt so much that when Taichi breathed in, the air froze in his lungs, and he had to squeeze at the broken ends of bone till he could inhale again. "I can't. I can't obey you, I have to break the Rule and I w-wa..." but want had no place here and he couldn't obey both rules, so one had to break.
Just like his arm.
"Why can't you?"
"I can't leave Konoha," Taichi said, voice crisp, cold. His fingers were numb.
"Then that's it..." Ichirou said, almost numbly.
Taichi shuddered, and nodded.
Ichirou wasn't coming back, and Taichi had to break a rule.
He felt like he was dead.
"You...won't reconsider?" Ichirou whispered.
The air was so cold, and his arm burned. He thought he could smell charred skin. It'd make a huge, messy scar, unless they chopped off layers and regrew it, but he didn't know. He didn't want to think anymore.
His arm hurt.
"I can't."
And there it was. Ichirou knew that there was nothing that he could do or say to make Taichi come. He sighed slumping and angrily sniffed, as if he could force the hot, salty tears back, force them not to fall.
Taichi watched Ichirou's tears slowly track down his face, cold and distant inside, and he couldn't think of anything. He'd disobeyed his dom. he'd had to, or else he would have had to leave Konoha, leave Nobu, Jintaro, Sado, ANBU.
Like Kakashi. Only Kakashi was doing it for his sanity - which Taichi still didn't understand, but he thought if Kakashi had two such conflicting Rules, maybe that was why.
It would have been so much easier if Ichirou had asked him to just leave ANBU.
Ichirou dashed the tears from his eyes, and sniffed hard.
"Do you need to be healed?" He asked, voice only sounding hoarse, a last ditch effort to keep Taichi close just a little longer...
Taichi looked at his arm, the mess of oozing blood and fluid, bubbled skin, bones aching within. "... probably," he said, finally, evenly.
"I'm not very good, but I can at least get the bones healed." Ichirou offered softly.
Would Ichirou ask again? Because if he did, Taichi'd have to break his arm again, and how many times would he have to disobey his dom? He couldn't. It broke something inside him, small, distant, and he wished Nobu were here to tell him what to do. "I have to get the tapes," he said, equally soft, watching Ichirou's eyes.
"I....can't let you do that." Ichirou whispered. "They'll ask me about it, and..."
I have to, Taichi started to say, then bowed his head. He couldn't... It hurt too much to think of even trying to disobey another order, and so...
He hadn't failed a mission for years. Konoha wouldn't mind this one.
Taichi was going soon, Ichirou knew that, and he just couldn't let that happen, not now, not when he had just seen him again. He raised a lean hand, cupping the back of Taichi's head, pulling him in for a long, soft kiss.
Why couldn't Ichirou come back? Taichi wanted to ask, leaning into the kiss, ignoring the burning pain. He wanted his dom back. THere, he'd said it, want. He wanted... it would have been perfect, he knew. Nobu liked Ichirou. Sado'd respected him, as much as Sado respected anyone. Jintaro would have been able to learn from Ichirou. Or... or anything. Everything. Everythign would have been fine, including his arm.
Ichirou kissed back desperately, shaking almost. Pulling away, he whispered on soft lips.
"Oh gods, Chi-chan, please...please..."
Taichi whined, pained, his arm throbbing. No. No, he couldn't. He couldn't. Please don't order me to. Please don't because i would have to obey this time and then i'll break.
Ichirou heard the whine and stopped, pulling himself together.
He already broke his own arm. He thought dully. Don't push him anymore.
Taichi was watching him, eyes wide, pupils blown, and he couldn't... couldn't... He had disobeyed his dom and he didn't know what that would do to him. Nobu had been right to punish him then - he needed Nobu to punish him now. Because... oh gods the pain. He reached up to touch Ichirou's arm, fingers light,tracing, and finally resting on Ichirou's face. Where the scars were. Had that really changed him that much? Because he still felt like Ichirou, Taichi's dom. But Ichirou wouldn't have askedhim to leave, just like Nobu wouldn't have asked him to leave, and... and..
But Taichi couldn't leave a dom anymore than he could leave Konoha, and Ichirou was his. His dom.
A sickening sort of hope skyrocketed in Ichirou.
"Yes?"
No. No... Taichi bit his lip and looked away. It shattered something in him to say no to the hope, the command, the order.
But he couldn't go with Ichirou. He couldn't. "No." he said, so soft he almost couldn't hear it, and it didn't hurt, at all, in his chest. Where his heart would have been.
Ichirou's face fell, closing, turning as blank as he could force it. He got off of Taichi, sitting at the edge of the bed, staring at the pile of his clothes.
Sorry. Gods I'm sorry. But Taichi didn't say anything, remaining there, a loose sprawl on the bed, Ichirou's come slowly leaking out to stain the sheets and Taichi wondered, whether the stories were true, about heartache and pain, because he felt all the pain in his arm but none of the heartache, just a blank.
Ichirou did not move, did not speak. Just sat there, staring, numb. Later, he figured, he would feel pain. But right now he had blanked out, and there was nothing.
Taichi finally winced - his arm was hurting badly enough that he had to force himself still, quivering. Glanced at Ichirou, and exhaled again. Ichirou was leaving. Ichirou was leaving and the last command he'd given him that Taichi could obey was to let him take the tapes, and ...
it wasn't really failing Konoha, just failing one mission - he'd barely get a slap on the wrist for it, what with the injury. and the target wasn't all that important, really.
Just...
Stop teasing me. Stop acting like you're going to change your mind, and stay with me. Ichirou curled tighter around himself.
"Ichi-sama," Taichi said, letting pain bleed into his voice. "Either you're going to heal my arm, or I have to leave."
the longer he stayed, the more likely Ichirou would give him an order he would have to obey and then.
Right, right, of course.
Ichirou turned around, his fingers lightly brushing on Taichi's bruise and discolored arm, forcing charka in, forcing bone to knit back together.
The last time I'll touch him.
Taichi shuddered, jerking slightly, Ichirou's inelegant and frankly clumsy method of chakra healing making it hurt almost as bad as breaking the bones, but marrow and bone knitted together, till only it was a bad bruise - if you discounted the burns.
Ichirou's fingers paused on Taichi's arm, reluctant to let go.
Taichi continued to lie there, letting his dom touch him, hold him. "You could come back," he said, softly. "You could come back and I'll even leave ANBU if you want me to."
Ichirou's eyes slid shut, as he thought of it, and considered it briefly.
No. They left me to die. To be tortured.
"I...can't."
And that was that. Taichi sat up slowly, still touching Ichirou's face. "Then I have to go."
And maybe they'll meet again. If... If... Ichirou could always change his mind. doms had the freedom to do that.
"Alright." Ichirou whispered, leaning in for one last kiss, trying to ignore the terrible ache in his chest.
it tasted salty. Salty and long and burned in his chest, and finally, finally Taichi had to break the kiss and leave.
It was a very long walk home.
Ichirou did not leave the room for a long, long time, buried in the sheets that still had the faint smell of Taichi on them. He lay there, dry eyed and staring, wishing and wanting.
Part 2