Contains Mild Sex Reference
2 April
When I moved into my house eighteen months ago I had to go on a white goods orgy: fridge freezer, washing machine, microwave ... oh go on, breadmaker. I finally got around to defrosting my fridge freezer, but it has singularly failed to refreeze. I tried turning things on and off, and turning up (down?) the thermostat to no avail.
Fortunately I found the paperwork and phoned the retailer, who told me to phone the manufacturer. They wanted code numbers, which took forty minutes to find (next to the crisper tray, not on the back of the unit as I'd expect). Anyway, they took a bit of convincing that it was broken, and threatened to charge me if nothing was wrong. Like I get a kick out of waiting all day for a service engineer.*
So Friday comes and I'm trying to marking and everytime a van drives by, I assumed that it's the engineer. He comes about 1pm, which is not bad since my experience of service slots is they come ten minutes from the end. He suggests it might not be working because the house is cold. I point out it went through two winters with no ill effects so that is not going to be it. He refits a thermostat, and tells me to check if things are working in forty eight hours. If not I need a new compressor and a systems engineer.
So today I call the manufacturers again and after an eternity on hold I finally get through to someone and tell them what the engineer says. There's incredulity in the answer, as if I made it up, the tone I last heard over my parcel, when I told the help desk that I had been told that it had gone out on the van. Meanwhile they do have the part, but they can't book the three hour slot I need. They will Ring Me. Honest, guv.
* Obviously there are the possibilities of it turning into a seventies porn scene, but I'm not exactly a bored housewife.
Edit
They did, and will make it on the one other day I'm working from home this week. Neat.
Thursday 5 April
The engineer arrived at 12, and went through the whole perhaps it's too cold thing and I went through the it was installed in winter thing. Within a minute or so of looking at the back, he discovered that there was oil in the compressor tubes and so it's basically fucked. They will give me a new fridge freezer, and will write to me about when they'll deliver. The Bank Holidays will make this fun, to say the least. In the meantime, tinned food and single portion recipes.
At least I have a spare thermostat now.
Thursday 12 April
It only took them a week to write to me. Except they didn't write to me, they wrote to Mrs A. The only Mrs A I know, who is my mother, lives several hundred miles from here.
Having phoned the logistics company, they have no record of the order, which might not have been downloaded yet. I should phone back tomorrow, "Or try Monday." Splutter.
Friday 13
The letter spoke of arranging a mutually convenient date, but they only do Mondays, and they can't do it until 23rd. That's convenient for them not me. That means I have to cancel the revision classes that day. I'm going to be popular. Mondays are my second heaviest day. Still, I'd have to take a day off if I was in a proper job.