(Untitled)

[goddamn_ironman]

1. I have a stalker. She's outside my front gates. Too bad she missed prime opportunity to live up to something awesome on Halloween. You know, get a mask, breathe on my windows or something

Comments

[entthront]

You gotta headshot them, duh!

Also is your stalker hot?

[fillmydarksoul]

Naw babe, you gotta take a melee to the neck.

[entthront]

Well it's basically the same thing, right? Cause I mean, if you shoot through the neck, the head's off!

[fillmydarksoul]

Nah, they function without their heads on. I mean, they're fucking zombies right? You gotta bash their skulls in.

[dreamsonaplane]

1. That's what you get for being so available.
2. It depends on the government.
3. Aren't you a little old to be watching zombie movies?

[goddamn_ironman]

1. What does that even mean?
2. American.
3. ... How old do you think I am?

[dreamsonaplane]

1. I'm sure if you think real hard you can figure it out.
2. Monopoly issues?
3. Eighteen.

[goddamn_ironman]

1. You're creeping me out.
2. Hardly. That tool Hammer (no pun intended) is trying to take me down as we speak.
3. Flatterer.

[autophoenix]

... You don't think she's dangerous or anything, do you?

[goddamn_ironman]

I'm Iron Man. Of course she's not dangerous.

[autophoenix]

Right. Okay, better question. What did you do to get the government mad at you? I mean, I know you can be a jerk, but even for someone like you, the whole government's a pretty big stretch.

[goddamn_ironman]

Something to do with the suit. I didn't read the letter all the way through.

[fillmydarksoul]

I'll take care of her for you in exchange for a flat screen TV.

[goddamn_ironman]

I'm changing your name to 'Gold Digger' in my phone.

[fillmydarksoul]

Hey babe, I need a flat screen TV and I happen to specialize in taking bitches out. Call me what you want, I'm just hella resourceful.

[goddamn_ironman]

But not resourceful enough to get yourself a TV.

[material_guy]

I think I'd do all right in a zombie invasion. They busted in on me in the bathroom and it worked out okay.

[goddamn_ironman]

... Sounds like one hell of a Halloween party.

[material_guy]

Wasn't on Halloween, either. It's like horror doesn't know it's got a day or somethin' set aside for it, eh?

[goddamn_ironman]

So, you really have zombies.