Working relationships

[originalfine]

Well, since I'm here, I might as well poll the masses. None of you know anyone involved, so maybe that's for the best.

Working with friends and lovers. How do you deal with it? How do you handle suddenly being "the boss" and trying to maintain an equal relationship? How do you do your job without treading on feelings?

Comments

[peoplesprincess]

If they really care, then they'll respect your position.

[originalfine]

Intellectually, I know that.

I don't think it's my problem. But it's one I have to live with.

[peoplesprincess]

They shouldn't make it difficult. If they do, they're horrible friends.

[originalfine]

Maybe. I'm trying to give them the benefit of the doubt, though.

[killerbaseball]

Work and personal relationships should be kept entirely separate.

[originalfine]

Less easy than it sounds, when you're isolated for five years. It's why they don't disallow relationships.

It's just proving harder than I thought to keep those things separate.

[killerbaseball]

Were you not prepared for it?

[originalfine]

Not exactly, no. I've still got my pockets of naivete. That is, I thought it would be easier than it is.

[entthront]

If you've got a stick up your butt, take it out!

[originalfine]

Charming analysis. I'm not above admitting it may be me--but there's only so much I can do. I'm still the captain.

[entthront]

Well I mean I wasn't saying you do, just that it makes people really mad if you go "I'm the boss, do what I say cause I'm the boss!" even if it's stupid.

[originalfine]

Well, I certainly try not to do that. I am the captain--they do pretty much have to do what I say.

[redheadedspy]

I'll admit it isn't quite the same case, since the man I'm in a relationship with is just a coworker rather than one of us being the direct superior, but... it helps to try to focus on work when you're on duty and keep your mind off of it otherwise, especially if you're in a dangerous line of work.

... That isn't really the best way to phrase what I had in mind, but it's one of those things that make much more sense in your head.

[Leila's quite good at this, but she's had to put a lot of thought into it, to the point that she can't really articulate it well anymore.]

[originalfine]

You're making perfect sense. It's what I'm trying to do--I guess I just need the practice. We all do.

[redheadedspy]

I know. I'm not sure it's really possible to be good at it in a way that's much more healthy than having to deal with mixing them up to begin with. I'm fairly certain that even if one were to work out a way to... shut one's emotions off, even temporarily, it wouldn't be a good idea.

[originalfine]

No. Probably not, and I'm not going to try it.

[takeitoutofpark]

You know, I wish that you would ask yourself this once in a while in my timeline.

[originalfine]

...

Should I ask?

Oh, I'm going to anyway.

[takeitoutofpark]

There's a certain level of casualness in a friendship between equals, and I appreciate maintaining that sort of relationship when I'm not manning the helm or discussing serious topics, but I - have trouble following it up, I guess. In a professional atmosphere. I don't know if that makes sense, and since the me you know (which is the one who runs around shirtless, I'll bet, because that's my luck) probably is better at it than I am now, being older and all that.

But you probably assumed that I was talking about something more scandalous than vaguely inappropriate jokes or friendly ribbing, huh?

[originalfine]

I confess, I did. I haven't heard about Sulu running around shirtless--I'll let you know. Do you think you're likely to?

But I do understand what you're saying--I've been on ships for many years, now, in positions like the one you have.