LJ (and SF) present: WrestleManiacs!
My birthday present from LJ had three components. The first was a $20 iTunes voucher, which I look forward to spending tomorrow. The second was one of her incredibly beautiful drawings. This latest masterpiece features Iron Man, Green Lantern Kyle Rayner, Animated Ultra Magnus, Captain America, Spider-Man, Wasp and Ant-Man in cool action poses. The final piece of the festive puzzle was a special offer: LJ wanted me to come up with this weekend's epic game.
Fortunately, I had the perfect idea. Earlier in the week I'd bought some of those WWE chibis, and it seemed a shame to display them without any playtime. With visions of recent Avengers episodes dancing in my head, I sought a compromise. I'd come up with the idea and the cast, but LJ had to solve all the problems and earn the heroes their victories. She accepted my challenge and we were off to meet the WrestleManiacs!
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The Mayor of Super Hero City rang the doorbell of Avengers Mansion, breathless with excitement. When the good guys answered, he told them his "brilliant news" - the WWE had chosen to hold this year's WrestleMania in the city! "That means tourists, and jobs, and income," the Mayor said. "Of course, I had to play down any mention of super-villains, invading space armies and evil alien robots, so... I'm here to ask you guys to play bodyguard for the wrestlers while they're in town."
Thor scoffed at the request. "I have seen these fools on the talking picture box," he sniffed. "They are not warriors, they are charlatans playing at the role. Their mockery of my craft is an affront to all of Asgard!" Others were more excited. Bumblebee, Bulkhead and Michaelangelo volunteered for guard duty and were approved... provided, Optimus Prime warned, they focused on protecting the celebrities, not snatching autographs.
Meanwhile, in Villainville, Doctor Doom was heaping abuse upon the newly-rescued Red Skull for his latest catastrophic failure. The Fallen, however, told him to stop. The Cybertronian was intrigued by the idea of creating super-soldiers and so proposed a contest: the villain who created the best new minion would win his favour. Doctor Octopus, MODOK, Atrocitus the Red Lantern and Shockwave accepted the challenge. They were told to use any technology they liked... but to build their soldier out of one of the visiting wrestlers.
Back in the city, the Mayor, Mikey and the 'bots waited outside the hotel in fits of glee. They all but squeed when Rey Mysterio, John Morrison, Sheamus and John Cena emerged. The guys were very friendly and grateful for the super-powered protection. Bumblebee was especially delighted to discover Mysterio knew his name, and had watched news footage of him in action! Their happiness was short-lived, sadly, as the competing villains wiped them out with a sneak attack. Atrocitus left them engulfed in a crimson inferno as the bad guys took off, in different directions, with their hapless hostages.
The fire department quickly responded to the blaze, as did patrolling Green Lantern John Stewart. The flames were doused, and the battered heroes returned to the mansion to try and explain what had happened. At first the others - especially Thor - were dismissive of the incident, deeming it a "simple rescue mission". It was the Atom who pointed out the real danger: he believed the wrestlers could be warped by villain technology into fiendish threats. As he finished voicing his fears, the supercomputer JARVIS registered an alert signal from the city!
John Morrison was the first altered wrestler to attack. Shockwave had outfitted him with cybernetic enhancements, augmenting his parkour skills to super-human levels. The "shaman of sexy" could run up walls, bounce off street signs and quite literally defy gravity! Spider-Man, Donatello and Red Tornado moved to intercept the destructive duo, looking to put down Shockwave and restrain Morrison with minimum damage. The wrestler made that task hard by breaking open a bank and flinging coins at them like shuriken. Finally, Tornado pulled him into the air ("if he has no surfaces to climb, he poses no threat") and slammed him down hard, where Spidey webbed him in place. Shockwave was defeated, and Don removed the enhancements to return Morrison to normal.
Soon after, a destructive red blur decimated the downtown area. It was Rey Mysterio, granted a form of super-speed by Doctor Octopus! Confronted by Ratchet, R2-D2 and the Flash, the madman claimed Mysterio was his "greatest ever creation". It looked to be true, especially when SHIELD director Nick Fury launched an independent assault and was downed by the masked marvel. Ratchet's magnets tied Ock up in knots, but not even the Flash could catch Mysterio. But R2-D2 was clever - by aiming where the wrestler would be, not where he was, he caught him with an electro-shock blast... halting him long enough for the Flash to deliver a knock-out blow. Mysterio was freed from the enhancements - which were exhausting his adrenal glands and would have, eventually, killed him - and rescued.
With two wrestlers still missing, Iron Man ordered the heroes out into the field. This angered Thor and some like-minded good guys - Chewbacca, Raphael and Green Arrow. Fittingly, it was they who came across Sheamus... now empowered with the red energy of rage! The Celtic Warrior's hair and beard were literally on fire, and he tore at the heroes like a man possessed. As Atrocitus laughed, Raphael realised their foe's weakness: like a power ring, his reserves had to be exhausted! Showing their endurance, the heroes insulted Sheamus and withstood his worst assaults, then dropped him with a single blow when he ran out of puff. Atrocitus tried to sneak up on Thor, but Sheamus saved the Asgardian, earning his respect in the process. "Perhaps even fake fighters possess true nobility," the Thunder God opined.
Only John Cena remained missing. Given the power levels shown by the other altered wrestlers, this was of great concern to the heroes. Superman and the Hulk, patrolling the wastelands, came across the nine-time champion... who had been irradiated with Gamma energy! MODOK had created a Cena-Hulk! What followed was one of the most titanic fist-fights in all recorded history. It might have technically been a handicap match but, fueled by anger and Gamma waves, Cena was the equal of both heroes. Superman's range of powers tipped the scales, as he used his super-breath to literally suck the irradiated air from Cena's lungs. That left the champ vulnerable to the Hulk's fists... and Superman on the verge of mutating! One Hulk-powered punch to the stomach later, Superman vented the tainted oxygen and everyone was safe.
With the performers rescued, Shockwave, MODOK and Doc Ock in prison and the city safe... it was finally time for the show! The heroes were given front-row seats as a thank-you and, to the surprise of everyone, Thor was most eager to attend. Everyone had a fantastic time at WrestleMania especially when, in the main event, John Cena defeated Sheamus. The champ's post-match celebration was shockingly interrupted by Atrocitus, who demanded revenge! The villain had, however, neglected to recharge his power ring before his attack and it ran out... leaving him at the mercy of four very angry wrestlers! The alien antagonist suffered a "starship pain", a "pale justice", an "attitude adjustment" and a "619", and was begging to be imprisoned after all that abuse!
The day won and the event completed, heroes and wrestlers alike headed to Warrior's restaurant for drinks and further revelry. The jailed villains, meanwhile, cried and complained from their cells... because Arkham Asylum doesn't get the pay-per-view channels!
----------
Transformers, super heroes, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Star Wars, pro wrestling and toys. Is there a better way to spend one's 32nd birthday? Not on your life.
Greet the Fire as Your Friend,
SF
Fortunately, I had the perfect idea. Earlier in the week I'd bought some of those WWE chibis, and it seemed a shame to display them without any playtime. With visions of recent Avengers episodes dancing in my head, I sought a compromise. I'd come up with the idea and the cast, but LJ had to solve all the problems and earn the heroes their victories. She accepted my challenge and we were off to meet the WrestleManiacs!
----------
The Mayor of Super Hero City rang the doorbell of Avengers Mansion, breathless with excitement. When the good guys answered, he told them his "brilliant news" - the WWE had chosen to hold this year's WrestleMania in the city! "That means tourists, and jobs, and income," the Mayor said. "Of course, I had to play down any mention of super-villains, invading space armies and evil alien robots, so... I'm here to ask you guys to play bodyguard for the wrestlers while they're in town."
Thor scoffed at the request. "I have seen these fools on the talking picture box," he sniffed. "They are not warriors, they are charlatans playing at the role. Their mockery of my craft is an affront to all of Asgard!" Others were more excited. Bumblebee, Bulkhead and Michaelangelo volunteered for guard duty and were approved... provided, Optimus Prime warned, they focused on protecting the celebrities, not snatching autographs.
Meanwhile, in Villainville, Doctor Doom was heaping abuse upon the newly-rescued Red Skull for his latest catastrophic failure. The Fallen, however, told him to stop. The Cybertronian was intrigued by the idea of creating super-soldiers and so proposed a contest: the villain who created the best new minion would win his favour. Doctor Octopus, MODOK, Atrocitus the Red Lantern and Shockwave accepted the challenge. They were told to use any technology they liked... but to build their soldier out of one of the visiting wrestlers.
Back in the city, the Mayor, Mikey and the 'bots waited outside the hotel in fits of glee. They all but squeed when Rey Mysterio, John Morrison, Sheamus and John Cena emerged. The guys were very friendly and grateful for the super-powered protection. Bumblebee was especially delighted to discover Mysterio knew his name, and had watched news footage of him in action! Their happiness was short-lived, sadly, as the competing villains wiped them out with a sneak attack. Atrocitus left them engulfed in a crimson inferno as the bad guys took off, in different directions, with their hapless hostages.
The fire department quickly responded to the blaze, as did patrolling Green Lantern John Stewart. The flames were doused, and the battered heroes returned to the mansion to try and explain what had happened. At first the others - especially Thor - were dismissive of the incident, deeming it a "simple rescue mission". It was the Atom who pointed out the real danger: he believed the wrestlers could be warped by villain technology into fiendish threats. As he finished voicing his fears, the supercomputer JARVIS registered an alert signal from the city!
John Morrison was the first altered wrestler to attack. Shockwave had outfitted him with cybernetic enhancements, augmenting his parkour skills to super-human levels. The "shaman of sexy" could run up walls, bounce off street signs and quite literally defy gravity! Spider-Man, Donatello and Red Tornado moved to intercept the destructive duo, looking to put down Shockwave and restrain Morrison with minimum damage. The wrestler made that task hard by breaking open a bank and flinging coins at them like shuriken. Finally, Tornado pulled him into the air ("if he has no surfaces to climb, he poses no threat") and slammed him down hard, where Spidey webbed him in place. Shockwave was defeated, and Don removed the enhancements to return Morrison to normal.
Soon after, a destructive red blur decimated the downtown area. It was Rey Mysterio, granted a form of super-speed by Doctor Octopus! Confronted by Ratchet, R2-D2 and the Flash, the madman claimed Mysterio was his "greatest ever creation". It looked to be true, especially when SHIELD director Nick Fury launched an independent assault and was downed by the masked marvel. Ratchet's magnets tied Ock up in knots, but not even the Flash could catch Mysterio. But R2-D2 was clever - by aiming where the wrestler would be, not where he was, he caught him with an electro-shock blast... halting him long enough for the Flash to deliver a knock-out blow. Mysterio was freed from the enhancements - which were exhausting his adrenal glands and would have, eventually, killed him - and rescued.
With two wrestlers still missing, Iron Man ordered the heroes out into the field. This angered Thor and some like-minded good guys - Chewbacca, Raphael and Green Arrow. Fittingly, it was they who came across Sheamus... now empowered with the red energy of rage! The Celtic Warrior's hair and beard were literally on fire, and he tore at the heroes like a man possessed. As Atrocitus laughed, Raphael realised their foe's weakness: like a power ring, his reserves had to be exhausted! Showing their endurance, the heroes insulted Sheamus and withstood his worst assaults, then dropped him with a single blow when he ran out of puff. Atrocitus tried to sneak up on Thor, but Sheamus saved the Asgardian, earning his respect in the process. "Perhaps even fake fighters possess true nobility," the Thunder God opined.
Only John Cena remained missing. Given the power levels shown by the other altered wrestlers, this was of great concern to the heroes. Superman and the Hulk, patrolling the wastelands, came across the nine-time champion... who had been irradiated with Gamma energy! MODOK had created a Cena-Hulk! What followed was one of the most titanic fist-fights in all recorded history. It might have technically been a handicap match but, fueled by anger and Gamma waves, Cena was the equal of both heroes. Superman's range of powers tipped the scales, as he used his super-breath to literally suck the irradiated air from Cena's lungs. That left the champ vulnerable to the Hulk's fists... and Superman on the verge of mutating! One Hulk-powered punch to the stomach later, Superman vented the tainted oxygen and everyone was safe.
With the performers rescued, Shockwave, MODOK and Doc Ock in prison and the city safe... it was finally time for the show! The heroes were given front-row seats as a thank-you and, to the surprise of everyone, Thor was most eager to attend. Everyone had a fantastic time at WrestleMania especially when, in the main event, John Cena defeated Sheamus. The champ's post-match celebration was shockingly interrupted by Atrocitus, who demanded revenge! The villain had, however, neglected to recharge his power ring before his attack and it ran out... leaving him at the mercy of four very angry wrestlers! The alien antagonist suffered a "starship pain", a "pale justice", an "attitude adjustment" and a "619", and was begging to be imprisoned after all that abuse!
The day won and the event completed, heroes and wrestlers alike headed to Warrior's restaurant for drinks and further revelry. The jailed villains, meanwhile, cried and complained from their cells... because Arkham Asylum doesn't get the pay-per-view channels!
----------
Transformers, super heroes, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Star Wars, pro wrestling and toys. Is there a better way to spend one's 32nd birthday? Not on your life.
Greet the Fire as Your Friend,
SF