In which Phoenix is a cat
Originally for the Phoenix Wright Kink Meme Anonymous. First...bunch can be found here: http://teagueful.livejournal.com/8191.html?thread=924415#t924415
Prompt: Phoenix is somehow turned into a cat and doesn't know how to change back.
It turns out that only Edgeworth's kiss can break the spell. :)
Now how does a fluffy Phoenix kitty get Edgeworth to kiss him? And what will happen afterwards?
I'm leaving all the details to you, anon! <3
Rating: PG so far (I don't know if I'll have the courage to change that, especially since I've come out about it, eheh)
Warnings: Um, some vague 2-4 and 1-4 spoilers.
The room he’d ducked into this time was obviously a study, or at-home office space, or something of that nature. It was something I didn’t have room for at my place anyway.
He was sitting at his desk and seemed engrossed in his computer. He was frowning at it pretty intensely.
I wonder if he’s looking up stuff on that case I was working on...?
...Of course he is. That’s probably the reason this happened...
...If he finds out anything useful, I hope he’ll tell me. I still can’t really remember what that was all about...
That fact did bother me...I knew I was forgetful at times, but this was starting to seem more serious than I’d originally thought.
At least I still know who I am...Though I don’t remember being a cat...
That led to a rather unpleasant thought.
It could be that I’m not actually who I think I am, and instead am a cat who’s been tricked into thinking that he’s Phoenix Wright...
...That’s ridiculous...But not any more ridiculous than the other possibility...ARGH.
I shook my head vigorously.
Forget it! I’ll let Edgeworth figure that part out! Right now I should be concentrating on telling him all this!
After searching all of Edgeworth’s house for some means of communication, with Pess trotting along behind me the whole time, I inevitably came back to the living room, where my coat was lying on a table. I stared at it for a while, thinking hard.
...Well, if it was strange the first time, it ought to be downright suspicious the second time, right...?
With that resolve, I pulled it off the table and onto the floor. Pess barked at me, but I ignored him. I think the fact that the coat wasn’t Edgeworth’s helped with his lack of persistence. After I dug out my cell phone, I called Edgeworth’s cell phone and waited.
He was very quick to pick up. “Gumshoe!? Did you find something else!?”
Uh...Check your caller id, Edgeworth!
“...Detective?”
Should I say something...?
Pess barked and wagged his tail. Happy to hear Edgeworth’s voice maybe...?
“......Pess!??” Edgeworth asked incredulously.
Guess I don’t have to.
A few moments later, he entered the living room, still holding the phone to his ear. He then hung up immediately.
“What on earth are you-!?” He was seething, and apparently at a loss for words. Finally, he stomped over and snatched my phone off the ground. “Give me that!” He hung up on my end, then glared at me. I wasn’t sure what else to do, so I just kind of grinned at him. His frown deepened. “Who taught you how to use a cell phone anyway?” he grumbled. He pocketed it and started to leave, but stopped. I watched him curiously. His hands were curled tightly into fists that seemed to be trembling slightly. At last, he reluctantly turned to me and crossed his arms, tapping one finger against his sleeve. “...Is that all you know how to do?” he asked tensely.
Ah! He-He’s asking me a question! This is my chance! Wait, how do I answer!? Oh!
I gave him my best grin and shook my head.
For a long moment, the only sound in the room was that of Edgeworth’s finger and Pess’s panting.
“So...you understand English?”
I nodded.
More silence.
I waited. He was definitely deliberating over something he didn’t want to be deliberating over.
“Do you know where Wright is?”
I nodded again.
I think he gasped under his breath.
“W-Well...do you...” He fixed me with his sternest glare. “Can you type?”
Huh?! Wait...That’s not a bad idea!
I nodded vigorously.
He didn’t hesitate after that. I was scooped up and carried swiftly to his office, where he plunked me down in front of his computer and opened up a word processor.
“Tell me where Wright is,” he demanded.
I felt myself shudder as I stared at the blinking cursor. I wasn’t prepared for such a direct question right off the bat...but it did mean I would get the chance to explain myself sooner. I took a deep breath and laid my paws on the keyboard, getting a feel for it before I began a very awkward process of hunting and pecking.
[here]
“...What!? What do you mean!?”
Oops, I guess that wasn’t clear enough.
[im here]
I didn’t look at him, but I could tell he was angry. When he spoke, it was in a low, carefully controlled voice. “I don’t think you understood me. I’m asking where Phoenix Wright is, not you.”
I sighed. This was going to be more difficult than I hoped. At least it was finally happening at all...
[i am phoenix wright]
I can’t say it any plainer than that...
The silence was getting thick while I waited for his response.
“That’s impossible!” he blurted out finally.
Ugh...How do I say this...?
[thats wat i thot]
“Your spelling is atrocious.”
Give me a break! It’s not like I’ve got hands!
“...Do you insist on sticking by this absurd claim?” he asked after a short while.
I almost started typing, but then realized I could just nod, so I did.
“In that case, I’m going to want to see some evidence...If you can provide any.”
Evidence!? How the heck am I supposed to prove this with evidence!?
...That’s the story of my life lately, isn’t it?
I sighed.
He started tapping his finger against his arm again. “If you can’t provide evidence, testimony will do.”
...Testimony, huh...? Something that only I’d know, and that Edgeworth can verify...
My mind raced over the various possibilities. Something from childhood? No, most of our shared memories also involved Larry somehow, and there was no guarantee Edgeworth would remember something like that anyway. Naturally, anything court-related was also public knowledge. That didn’t leave me with many options.
This...might do the trick.
[badgenum 26381]
“...Hmph. That’s no good. You had his coat didn’t you? You could have looked at that at any-”
“Objection!”
...That...sounded really weird.
It stopped Edgeworth in his tracks though.
I coughed and typed in my explanation.
[cant no hands]
“You can use a cell phone.”
[difrnt]
“Grngh...” His finger tapping got more rapid. I could see his throat tightening while he gritted his teeth. “...Fine. Give...Give me a moment. Don’t move.”
Without waiting for an answer, he turned and strode out the room. Pess, who I’d just noticed was there, started to follow him, then seemed to change his mind and sat down to stare at me.
I wondered vaguely if the dog was like a robot that would follow it’s assigned program until told otherwise. So far, the evidence pointed to yes.
Edgeworth came back quickly. He had a grim look on his face and had my coat draped over one arm and had...my badge in one hand. I looked at him expectantly. Surely, now he could finally admit that I was telling the truth and we could get on with it and find a way to fix this problem...
“Before I tell you whether you were right,” he pointed at me, “I want you to provide at least one more piece of corroborating evidence.”
What!?
“If you really are Phoenix Wright, something like this should be nothing.”
Urk...Glad you hold me in such high regard, Edgeworth...
“Before you make a fool out of yourself...” he said quietly.
...Maybe he really does think I’m me?
“...I’ll tell you that I already have something in mind.”
...Oh.
His voice became stronger, not for the first time tonight reminding me of facing off with him in court. “Prove to me that you know the reason Phoenix Wright became a lawyer!”
...Edgeworth...
His eyes were solemn. I drew in a slow breath and smiled to myself.
...Thanks.
The answer to that was simple. To be sure, I had to finally use the shift key, but I knew he would understand.
[$38.00]
Moar to come. Later. Buah.
EDIT: ( Moar is here )
Prompt: Phoenix is somehow turned into a cat and doesn't know how to change back.
It turns out that only Edgeworth's kiss can break the spell. :)
Now how does a fluffy Phoenix kitty get Edgeworth to kiss him? And what will happen afterwards?
I'm leaving all the details to you, anon! <3
Rating: PG so far (I don't know if I'll have the courage to change that, especially since I've come out about it, eheh)
Warnings: Um, some vague 2-4 and 1-4 spoilers.
The room he’d ducked into this time was obviously a study, or at-home office space, or something of that nature. It was something I didn’t have room for at my place anyway.
He was sitting at his desk and seemed engrossed in his computer. He was frowning at it pretty intensely.
I wonder if he’s looking up stuff on that case I was working on...?
...Of course he is. That’s probably the reason this happened...
...If he finds out anything useful, I hope he’ll tell me. I still can’t really remember what that was all about...
That fact did bother me...I knew I was forgetful at times, but this was starting to seem more serious than I’d originally thought.
At least I still know who I am...Though I don’t remember being a cat...
That led to a rather unpleasant thought.
It could be that I’m not actually who I think I am, and instead am a cat who’s been tricked into thinking that he’s Phoenix Wright...
...That’s ridiculous...But not any more ridiculous than the other possibility...ARGH.
I shook my head vigorously.
Forget it! I’ll let Edgeworth figure that part out! Right now I should be concentrating on telling him all this!
After searching all of Edgeworth’s house for some means of communication, with Pess trotting along behind me the whole time, I inevitably came back to the living room, where my coat was lying on a table. I stared at it for a while, thinking hard.
...Well, if it was strange the first time, it ought to be downright suspicious the second time, right...?
With that resolve, I pulled it off the table and onto the floor. Pess barked at me, but I ignored him. I think the fact that the coat wasn’t Edgeworth’s helped with his lack of persistence. After I dug out my cell phone, I called Edgeworth’s cell phone and waited.
He was very quick to pick up. “Gumshoe!? Did you find something else!?”
Uh...Check your caller id, Edgeworth!
“...Detective?”
Should I say something...?
Pess barked and wagged his tail. Happy to hear Edgeworth’s voice maybe...?
“......Pess!??” Edgeworth asked incredulously.
Guess I don’t have to.
A few moments later, he entered the living room, still holding the phone to his ear. He then hung up immediately.
“What on earth are you-!?” He was seething, and apparently at a loss for words. Finally, he stomped over and snatched my phone off the ground. “Give me that!” He hung up on my end, then glared at me. I wasn’t sure what else to do, so I just kind of grinned at him. His frown deepened. “Who taught you how to use a cell phone anyway?” he grumbled. He pocketed it and started to leave, but stopped. I watched him curiously. His hands were curled tightly into fists that seemed to be trembling slightly. At last, he reluctantly turned to me and crossed his arms, tapping one finger against his sleeve. “...Is that all you know how to do?” he asked tensely.
Ah! He-He’s asking me a question! This is my chance! Wait, how do I answer!? Oh!
I gave him my best grin and shook my head.
For a long moment, the only sound in the room was that of Edgeworth’s finger and Pess’s panting.
“So...you understand English?”
I nodded.
More silence.
I waited. He was definitely deliberating over something he didn’t want to be deliberating over.
“Do you know where Wright is?”
I nodded again.
I think he gasped under his breath.
“W-Well...do you...” He fixed me with his sternest glare. “Can you type?”
Huh?! Wait...That’s not a bad idea!
I nodded vigorously.
He didn’t hesitate after that. I was scooped up and carried swiftly to his office, where he plunked me down in front of his computer and opened up a word processor.
“Tell me where Wright is,” he demanded.
I felt myself shudder as I stared at the blinking cursor. I wasn’t prepared for such a direct question right off the bat...but it did mean I would get the chance to explain myself sooner. I took a deep breath and laid my paws on the keyboard, getting a feel for it before I began a very awkward process of hunting and pecking.
[here]
“...What!? What do you mean!?”
Oops, I guess that wasn’t clear enough.
[im here]
I didn’t look at him, but I could tell he was angry. When he spoke, it was in a low, carefully controlled voice. “I don’t think you understood me. I’m asking where Phoenix Wright is, not you.”
I sighed. This was going to be more difficult than I hoped. At least it was finally happening at all...
[i am phoenix wright]
I can’t say it any plainer than that...
The silence was getting thick while I waited for his response.
“That’s impossible!” he blurted out finally.
Ugh...How do I say this...?
[thats wat i thot]
“Your spelling is atrocious.”
Give me a break! It’s not like I’ve got hands!
“...Do you insist on sticking by this absurd claim?” he asked after a short while.
I almost started typing, but then realized I could just nod, so I did.
“In that case, I’m going to want to see some evidence...If you can provide any.”
Evidence!? How the heck am I supposed to prove this with evidence!?
...That’s the story of my life lately, isn’t it?
I sighed.
He started tapping his finger against his arm again. “If you can’t provide evidence, testimony will do.”
...Testimony, huh...? Something that only I’d know, and that Edgeworth can verify...
My mind raced over the various possibilities. Something from childhood? No, most of our shared memories also involved Larry somehow, and there was no guarantee Edgeworth would remember something like that anyway. Naturally, anything court-related was also public knowledge. That didn’t leave me with many options.
This...might do the trick.
[badgenum 26381]
“...Hmph. That’s no good. You had his coat didn’t you? You could have looked at that at any-”
“Objection!”
...That...sounded really weird.
It stopped Edgeworth in his tracks though.
I coughed and typed in my explanation.
[cant no hands]
“You can use a cell phone.”
[difrnt]
“Grngh...” His finger tapping got more rapid. I could see his throat tightening while he gritted his teeth. “...Fine. Give...Give me a moment. Don’t move.”
Without waiting for an answer, he turned and strode out the room. Pess, who I’d just noticed was there, started to follow him, then seemed to change his mind and sat down to stare at me.
I wondered vaguely if the dog was like a robot that would follow it’s assigned program until told otherwise. So far, the evidence pointed to yes.
Edgeworth came back quickly. He had a grim look on his face and had my coat draped over one arm and had...my badge in one hand. I looked at him expectantly. Surely, now he could finally admit that I was telling the truth and we could get on with it and find a way to fix this problem...
“Before I tell you whether you were right,” he pointed at me, “I want you to provide at least one more piece of corroborating evidence.”
What!?
“If you really are Phoenix Wright, something like this should be nothing.”
Urk...Glad you hold me in such high regard, Edgeworth...
“Before you make a fool out of yourself...” he said quietly.
...Maybe he really does think I’m me?
“...I’ll tell you that I already have something in mind.”
...Oh.
His voice became stronger, not for the first time tonight reminding me of facing off with him in court. “Prove to me that you know the reason Phoenix Wright became a lawyer!”
...Edgeworth...
His eyes were solemn. I drew in a slow breath and smiled to myself.
...Thanks.
The answer to that was simple. To be sure, I had to finally use the shift key, but I knew he would understand.
[$38.00]
Moar to come. Later. Buah.
EDIT: ( Moar is here )