Croquet Nationals! Dalton and I are going to fuck shit up.

Oral tomorrow. I've been freaking out but now that my prace/prece/presea/prefontaine/whateverthefuckitsspellingis is written I'm pumped.

Now I just gotta stay sober at Big Beer. Tomorrow, however... I will black out by five.

I have my croquet jumpsuit, I will be wearing it until the game.

I keep having weird dreams about being naked in NYC.

Eve shit on the kitchen floor. Also Eve isn't actually Eve, she's Steve. Or now Simba. Anyway, what the fuck.  His litter box is a foot away.

Heath won. Thank God.

Next time Benjamin Button wins an award over Dark Knight I'm killing someone.

Eve has one of those toys that has a long thing attached to it with feathers and a ball that you wave around in front of her to make her go crazy trying to catch it.

She now carries it with her everywhere she goes. Like a little kid's blankie.

Awwe.

I just took the most epic shit ever.

I am going to be cool and keep track of my page count via facebook status updates (/sarcasm ( Read more... )