Title: The Right Reasons
Pairings: 2U, father!son HoSu, bff!JaeSu
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Yunho is a single father and happy with his stable life together with his four year old son.
Yoochun's life is a mess, but he is good with kids.
A/N: Today is the first anniversary of my LJ account. Yes, I created an account on Valentine's Day (which was a coincidence, I swear). No, I obviously did not have a date.
I love 2U.
Valentine’s Day. It was on Valentine’s Day that they had a romantic dinner, with candles, booked a hotel suite for the first time in both of their lives, with champagne, and had passionate sex all night, without condoms.
They had decided that they were ready for children a few months before, and it was a very romantic coincidence that the test came out positive after that Valentine’s Day, or night, technically.
She complained a lot during her pregnancy, but Yunho didn’t worry because he was nervous as well, and there were always the hormones. Not once did the thought cross his mind that their mutual child wish hadn't been that mutual at all.
Their son was healthy, beautiful, and, from the moment he announced his presence in this world with a wail surprisingly powerful for such a tiny person, firmly attached to Yunho’s heart, stuck to it like chewing gum, but most of the time less annoying.
She had always owned a part of his heart as well.
When she said that this wasn’t the life she'd wanted, that her feelings for him had disappeared so suddenly that she didn’t know where they went, she broke off a part of that heart and took it with her.
She said it was hard, that she loved their child, but from her need to convince him of that by stating it Yunho could tell that he loved him more. She proved him right by continuing to say that she wasn’t ready to be a mother and wanted out.
Before she closed the door behind her, she kissed their son’s chubby cheek, and Yunho could see in his reaction that her lips were too cold.
Maybe she broke off a part of his little heart as well that very moment, but the boy wouldn’t notice until the next day when he didn’t sense his mother’s presence anymore and Yunho had to deal with endless bouts of crying for weeks.
They survived, the both of them, with a lot of help from Yunho’s family and friends. And they built a new life in which Yunho gave up part of his job and moved into a smaller apartment but never complained about anything.
When she died in a car crash he had no idea what to feel anymore.
He wondered if it was better knowing that she hadn’t loved him until the end, or if that drunk driver should have hit the road six months earlier and he would have been able to pour his heart out on her funeral.
He’d never gotten back the part of it she took with her and so on her funeral he mostly felt numb.
But he did cry, and if it wasn’t for them, then it was for the peacefully sleeping one year old in his mother’s lap, for first losing his mother and then losing the possibility of ever visiting her. Within the time he’d learned to say his first words.
At least it was a good thing that he’d had time to get used to taking care of a toddler before he was really all on his own.
For a moment, as he stood there thinking about the future with tears dripping down his cheeks, he wasn’t sure if his scattered heart would ever beat properly again.
But it didn’t stop either. It was broken, but something held the pieces together, something like chewing gum.
When his father picked him up from his grandmother’s lap, Junsu let out a delighted squeal and his tiny fingers closed around a strand of Yunho’s hair, merciless.
Yunho looked at the concentration in the bright, shiny eyes right when another small hand found his lips and pulled, the tiniest nails digging into his skin. He pretended to bite down and Junsu’s laugh sounded like music to his ears.
That’s when he knew that he could still love and that he’d found the person most worthy of that love in the entire world.
He was pretty sure that during that night that they made Junsu, she had still loved him. And he had obviously still loved her because she hadn’t broken his heart yet. Junsu was full of love.
He decided that Junsu was the one he’d give his heart to, all of it, forever.
Three years later, it was Junsu who first met Yoochun, on Valentine’s Day.
Junsu was a perfect child, to the extend in which children can be perfect. He had his fits, but Yunho spent a lot of love and devotion on deciding when to be strict and when to give in and when to ignore and when to hug, and it paid off.
The happiest moments of his life were when Junsu gave him some love back, whether it was a sloppy kiss on his cheek or a secret about the ants living under the slide, carefully whispered into his ear, cookie crumbles included.
When he sent Junsu to kindergarten Yunho had more time for work, but he worried about other children bullying his son for not having a mother.
He didn’t have to worry about anything. Junsu was a cute and bubbly boy in more than just his eyes and besides all the female teachers falling in love with him, not one child wanted to be the cause of tears rolling down those soft puffy cheeks.
Their life was all Yunho had ever hoped for. His heart got a boost with every colourful scribbled drawing that was supposed to be him, the stray cat they met last Saturday, and their house but with more flowers and animals around it than you’d expect of a third floor apartment. He had love to spare.
The sex could have been better, but then again, his own hand knew exactly how to make him feel good and the porn he occasionally dared to pull up on his computer screen reminded him of his college days and in a way made him feel young.
And of course he was a single father, and no one complained when he was a bit irresponsible at times. They had a lot of fun when they ate chocolate ice-cream and watched television for too long.
Yunho couldn't wait for the time he'd be able to watch real movies with Junsu, not just brightly coloured animals singing songs.
He didn’t have the feeling that there was something missing, or someone. But he wasn’t sure if Junsu felt the same.
Whether he did or not, Junsu was very excited the day he discovered an orange man in the flower bed next to the school. Maybe it was an omen.
Yoochun wasn’t actually orange, but his vest was, and since he was kneeling with his back turned to Junsu and Junsu wasn’t very tall, almost all of him looked orange. Junsu would tell Yunho all about it later.
When Yunho arrived at the school, five minutes late because of traffic, Junsu was talking to this stranger.
As he came closer he saw the man hand Junsu a flower. Junsu took it in his little hand and looked like he’d won the lottery. Yunho finally reached him and ruffled his hair.
Junsu looked up at him with a big smile. “Look!” He held up the flower.
Yunho would have told him to thank the man properly, but he wanted to know why a stranger was giving his son flowers in front of a school.
He knew he was being overprotective, everyone always told him he was, but he just couldn’t help it.
“Su, this is yours!” Junsu turned around at the call and ran to his friend Jaejoong who was waving a paper above his head. What followed was a heated discussion with as goal to determine whether the elephant in Junsu’s drawing looked like a cat or not.
Yunho smiled at the two boys and then noticed that the man next to him had stood up. He turned to him.
“You must be Junsu’s father.” The man held up two hands covered in soil. “I would give you a hand, but your suit looks expensive.”
He smiled and it was an attractive smile, dimples appeared in his cheeks. Yunho couldn’t help but return it.
This was another thing that reminded him of college. He had dated a few men before he’d fallen in love with a woman.
“He’s a cute kid.” The man looked him up and down. “And you look good for a father.”
“... was that supposed to be a pick-up line?”
The man laughed. “Caught me. Sorry, I don’t want to anger your wife.”
Yunho probably couldn’t stop the hurt from flashing over his face, because the man’s smile fell.
Suddenly Yunho wanted to make him feel bad, who was he anyway?
“Junsu’s mother died three years ago.” He didn’t hide the sharp edge in his voice.
There was actual guilt in the man’s eyes. “I’m sorry.”
.. and now Yunho felt bad. He closed his eyes and sighed. “It’s okay, I mean, it isn’t, but.. yeah.. long time ago.”
“I see where Junsu got his cute side.”
Yunho’s eyes shot to the other’s face again and found a careful look. The man was wondering if he’d said something wrong again. When Yunho didn’t say anything he seemed to assume he had.
“Sorry, I speak my thoughts out loud too often.”
Yunho shook his head and looked into Junsu’s direction. Junsu had given the flower to Jaejoong, who had put it in his hair. One of Jaejoong’s big sisters had come to pick him up and she tried to get rid of it.
“Come on, Jae, you’re not a girl.”
“But you have flowers in your hair too sometimes!” Jaejoong dodged her hand and pouted.
“I was so glad to finally have a brother too, stop imitating us!”
Finally Junsu stepped between them. He almost got elbowed in the head before the other two calmed down and Yunho had been very close to running over there.
“But noona, it’s Valentine’s Day. Joongie just wants to look pretty. And it’s my present.”
The girl visibly melted and seemed to have forgotten all about her brother as she cooed over Junsu.
Yunho smiled.
“So, who’s your Valentine?”
Yunho turned around and was met by that attractive smile again.
“Why do I keep feeling like you’re hitting on me?”
“You’re a hot guy in an expensive suit with the cutest kid. You must feel like that all the time.”
Yunho actually almost smiled.
“Can I interpret your silence as I hope I should and ask you out?”
Yunho hadn’t dated since.. He hadn’t dated in forever. And he didn’t feel the desire to.
“You can, but I won’t say yes.”
“Then I wish you a great Valentine’s Day. Your son just saved his friend’s life, I say he deserves chocolate.”
Yunho nodded and turned around, because he didn’t know what else to do. An ‘ah!’ made him turn back.
“Sorry for not introducing myself earlier. I’m Yoochun. If we ever meet again you can just call me that because we did almost have a date on Valentine’s Day, I say we’re very close.”
Yunho called Junsu and looked at Yoochun. “Yunho.” He took Junsu’s hand and led him to his car. He had no idea why he suddenly felt like he should get away from there. It wasn't like he would have changed his mind.
Yoochun was bold, borderline annoyingly so, and yet...
After putting Junsu to bed and dropping down on the couch, Yunho could see nothing but that smile every time he closed his eyes.
He didn’t need a relationship. He wasn’t interested. And him dating someone could cause Junsu stress. He didn’t want to have to divide his attention.
He wasn’t afraid to get hurt himself. He’d been hurt so much before and yet here he was, happy about his life. As long as he had Junsu he could take anything, no one mattered more.
But still...
Yunho tried to stop thinking about this. For some strange reason, that went against everything he’d just used to convince himself that it was best to stay single, he was way too close to regretting rejecting Yoochun.
This wasn’t worth his time. He would probably never see Yoochun again anyway.
Part 2: Tulips in February