separation anxiety
Hi there. I've been on here for awhile but mostly in lurk form.
I have a sweet 1 year old Thai Ridgeback mix named Jonesy. I adopted him from a local rescue about 3 1/2 months ago. He bonded very strongly to me almost immediately. The first time I left him alone in the backyard for more than 30 seconds he started barking at the door and flinging his body against it. He broke out of his first crate and chewed right through his second one. I bought a third crate and very, very slowly reintroduced him to being in a crate. He is fed all of his meals out of a Kong in his crate. He gets lots of happy noises and high value treats when he goes into the crate and, as of recently, had started finally liking the crate. He was choosing to nap there throughout the day and I could finally close the door and do chores around the house while he napped.
I also have friends watch him while I go to work or class. He is rarely left alone for longer than a couple of hours. I pretty much never go out to eat or the bar anymore because I can't leave my crazy dog alone. On Saturday I had to leave him alone because of a good friend's wedding. Long story short: I left the back door unlocked and my crazy genius door-opening cat got to it, let all the cats and Jonesy out into the backyard. The cats just chilled in the backyard, but Jonesy jumped the 6'+ fence and ran to my work to try and find me. (Okay, I need to admit here that I am actually a little impressed that he found my work when I had only been working there for one day. It is about a mile from my house and I walked to work. By the time line that we could figure out, it seems that he immediately ran to my work).
So, yesterday we were supposed to go on a 4 day car trip. He's been fine in the car before and will always just jump right in. I had class that day so we stopped there first (I go to school an hour away from home). I parked in a shaded area, gave him some water, cracked the windows (it was a cool day as well). When I came back from class, I came back to a dog who had vomited, peed, and crapped everywhere and had a golf ball sized bruise on his nose from trying to escape the crate. The crate is bent and pretty much ruined at this point.
I cleaned up best I could and then took him for a long hike in the woods and down to the beach. He calmed down a bit but was still a hot mess. I cut the trip short and drove back home so he could sleep somewhere familiar rather than in strange houses with new-strange-to-him people.
I love my dog and am committed to working through this with him. But some days, like yesterday, I feel like he's just never going to get better. I'm afraid that I'll never have a social life again because I can't go out unless I have a dog sitter. And? My dog is unhappy. It kills me that he is unhappy and that part of that is my fault. I've met with a trainer, have tried Prozac, we work on desensitizing every single day, he gets tons of exercise every day, and we are on the NILIF program. But I haven't figured it out yet. I'm still trying to find the right way to work with him on this and 3 1/2 months doesn't sound like a long time, but trust me, it sure feels like a lot longer when you're dealing with this every day.
I don't care about the 3 crates he's destroyed, I'm not mad that I have had to clean up crap, pee, and vomit multiple times now, and I'm not even that bothered that I've poured hundreds of dollars into trying to help this anxiety ridden dog. I'm just wrecked by how some days it feels like it isn't working. It kills me that my dog is so unhappy. Please, right now, I need to hear your happy endings to a bad case of separation anxiety. If not happy ending, at least, he/she's-doing-better-ending? Tell me I'm not crazy for believing this can and will get better.
We're heading back to the vet right now.
So it isn't all text:
The little man:
Him sleeping with his brother, Madison:
I have a sweet 1 year old Thai Ridgeback mix named Jonesy. I adopted him from a local rescue about 3 1/2 months ago. He bonded very strongly to me almost immediately. The first time I left him alone in the backyard for more than 30 seconds he started barking at the door and flinging his body against it. He broke out of his first crate and chewed right through his second one. I bought a third crate and very, very slowly reintroduced him to being in a crate. He is fed all of his meals out of a Kong in his crate. He gets lots of happy noises and high value treats when he goes into the crate and, as of recently, had started finally liking the crate. He was choosing to nap there throughout the day and I could finally close the door and do chores around the house while he napped.
I also have friends watch him while I go to work or class. He is rarely left alone for longer than a couple of hours. I pretty much never go out to eat or the bar anymore because I can't leave my crazy dog alone. On Saturday I had to leave him alone because of a good friend's wedding. Long story short: I left the back door unlocked and my crazy genius door-opening cat got to it, let all the cats and Jonesy out into the backyard. The cats just chilled in the backyard, but Jonesy jumped the 6'+ fence and ran to my work to try and find me. (Okay, I need to admit here that I am actually a little impressed that he found my work when I had only been working there for one day. It is about a mile from my house and I walked to work. By the time line that we could figure out, it seems that he immediately ran to my work).
So, yesterday we were supposed to go on a 4 day car trip. He's been fine in the car before and will always just jump right in. I had class that day so we stopped there first (I go to school an hour away from home). I parked in a shaded area, gave him some water, cracked the windows (it was a cool day as well). When I came back from class, I came back to a dog who had vomited, peed, and crapped everywhere and had a golf ball sized bruise on his nose from trying to escape the crate. The crate is bent and pretty much ruined at this point.
I cleaned up best I could and then took him for a long hike in the woods and down to the beach. He calmed down a bit but was still a hot mess. I cut the trip short and drove back home so he could sleep somewhere familiar rather than in strange houses with new-strange-to-him people.
I love my dog and am committed to working through this with him. But some days, like yesterday, I feel like he's just never going to get better. I'm afraid that I'll never have a social life again because I can't go out unless I have a dog sitter. And? My dog is unhappy. It kills me that he is unhappy and that part of that is my fault. I've met with a trainer, have tried Prozac, we work on desensitizing every single day, he gets tons of exercise every day, and we are on the NILIF program. But I haven't figured it out yet. I'm still trying to find the right way to work with him on this and 3 1/2 months doesn't sound like a long time, but trust me, it sure feels like a lot longer when you're dealing with this every day.
I don't care about the 3 crates he's destroyed, I'm not mad that I have had to clean up crap, pee, and vomit multiple times now, and I'm not even that bothered that I've poured hundreds of dollars into trying to help this anxiety ridden dog. I'm just wrecked by how some days it feels like it isn't working. It kills me that my dog is so unhappy. Please, right now, I need to hear your happy endings to a bad case of separation anxiety. If not happy ending, at least, he/she's-doing-better-ending? Tell me I'm not crazy for believing this can and will get better.
We're heading back to the vet right now.
So it isn't all text:
The little man:
Him sleeping with his brother, Madison: