Of Ducks and Roses [PG-13] for ayboo_da_bish (4/4)

[ferretbush_post]

Title: Of Ducks and Roses
Author: The Virgin Butterfly
Rating: PG-13
Recipient: ayboo_da_bish
Disclaimer: J.K.R’s characters are not mine.
Warnings: Minor character death, slight innuendos, alcohol usage and swearing. (Ha ha… just noticed I wrote down no character death as a no-no on my form… oh well…)
Author Note: The last chapter. I hoped you

Comments

[ningloreth]

This is a really ambitious story! It has a bit of everything -- missing scenes, modified canon, drama, UST, banter... You did a very good job on the battle scenes, and I loved the way you kept Hermione's relationship with Ron bubbling away in the background whilst it was obvious (to the reader) that she and Draco were falling in love. Like other people, I wasn't sure why Hermione left at the end -- maybe a couple of paragraphs showing some sort of misunderstanding between them would have helped. But I loved the way you made us feel Draco's numbness with the series of 'empty' dates. Brilliant! Then, of course, you gave us a happy ending with the baby :-)

[ningloreth]

thank you! :#) *doing a little happy dance*

i have to say i went a little baby crazy on that last part... i was actually thinking of making pansy pregnent too. No idea why XD

[anonymous]

thank you to all the wonderful and warm reviews! ( i do hope they'll be more...)

i'm seeing a colective confusion as to why Hermione left: the way i see it, she was really confused about what happened so at first she left to get her berings, just for a little while. when she found out she was pregnent she didn't think Draco loved her so she stayed away.

the reason it seems so rushed (and i am planning on correcting everything and probably re-writing the entire 4th part before i post it on my ff.net accunt) is because it WAS rushed. i wrote ch. 4 on the LAST day before it was due! so if you want to see the revised verion i suggest you look me up after the exchange is finished!

again thank you thank you thank you!!!

[withdrawnred]

What an interesting play on an almost-canon world. I also wish there were more explanation about why she left -- why would she just hide out, waiting for him to find her for seven, eight months?

[rzzmg]

I think I have to agree with the sentiment of other reviewers: Hermione's leaving made absolutely no sense and honestly, disappointed me. You'd set her up all along as a strong person who faced challenges, who trusted in her close friends, and then she pulls a runner? And her friends knew all along where she was and why she'd gone, but they never told him? It didn't work for me, mystery author, and that plot device truthfully hurt this story, I felt. You'd spent so much time working up their friendship and overcoming so much together, only to completely turn it on its head. And the fact that he'd taken her back after leaving him for eight long months wondering what he'd done wrong doesn't work for me either, no matter how lovesick he'd been for her. Your Draco wasn't that whipped as to let her mistreat him in such a manner, I felt

[rzzmg]

thank you for the wonderful segestions, RZZMG! i really appritiate you taking the time and reviewing all the chapters!

as for ch. 4- like i said, i wrote it in one day after spending weeks on the rest of the chapters (very bad planning on my part). I will deffinatly revisit the story and probably do a major rewrite of ch. 4 before i post it.
i guess in my mind the whole thing worked better than how it actually worked on e-paper.
thank you for your sugestions and i will deffinatly work on putting in some of them (i do think i will work with the whole draco padma thing just because for some reason i cannot stand Astoria!)

[ayboo_da_bish]

Hello! I'm sorry it took me so long to read and comment, but I've been so busy lately! Well, this was a really interesting read, and I like how you took the time to develop their relationship. It's obvious that you really worked hard on this; thank you so, so much! :)

[ayboo_da_bish]

I'm just glad you liked it! ^_^