Comments | diluted_thought: kuroshitsuji | veritas diaboli manet in aeternum [1/2]

diluted_thought

kuroshitsuji | veritas diaboli manet in aeternum [1/2]

Jun 16, 2010 18:24

Title: Veritas Diaboli Manet in Aeternum
Fandom: Kuroshitsuji
Rating: R (bordering on NC-17)
Characters/Pairings: Agni, Soma, Sebastian, and Ciel; Sebastian/Agni (Arshad).
Warnings: AU. Vaguely explicit sexual content.
Word Count: 16,381
Author’s Note: Post Curry Arc of the mangaverse. AU begins towards the end of Chapter 23: His Butler, Intermingling; ( Read more... )

pairing: sebastian/agni, fandom: kuroshitsuji, writing: fanfictions

Comments 5

veleda_k June 18 2010, 05:40:22 UTC

I hope that you don't mind me commenting on each part separately.

I really like seeing Soma's serious side here. It's a part of him that doesn't get much attention. I also like his worry for Ciel. It seems fitting that Soma would be the first character to really examine Sebastian. "The Fool" characters work well for seeing the truths that others miss.

Sebastian's temptation of Agni is excellent. It's both erotic and chilling.

Off to part two!

diluted_thought June 18 2010, 20:42:41 UTC

I don't mind at all. ♥ Thanks for taking the time to comment!

Yeah, one thing I'd really love Yana to focus on (aside from Agni's personality so that finally the canon can outweigh my fanon) is the serious side of Soma. I mean, yes, he's a dork and loses the plot more often than he should as a prince, but he's 17 and maturing, and I do think it's fair to say that he's a perceptive guy-if anything, he's got his doubts about Sebastian.

Sebastian's such a sophisticated whore. I can't even. XD;

Part one! starsplinter June 19 2010, 00:06:55 UTC

Soma is just fantastic - cheerfully friendly with a steel to him that hasn't had enough time to shine in the canon, I think. He's more perceptive than anyone accounts for. We're seeing him through Agni's eyes, so it's a little shinier than Ciel would see. His evidence is a little shaky, but that's so IC it's ridiculous - he's so convinced of his own view that any disagreement is merely an inconvenience to be fixed. It'll take more than Meena and Ciel mentally curbstomping the boy to fix that flaw in the little prince. And symbolism counts for a lot, when you're dealing with the religious ( ... )

Re: Part one! diluted_thought June 19 2010, 04:19:15 UTC

First of all, thanks for taking the time to write this wonderfully in-depth, verbose comment, even after giving direct feedback as you read the fic. It means a lot to me! I will address each of your paragraphs piece by piece, if that’s okay.

Thank you! I’m glad you found Soma to your liking. I really hope that Yana elaborates more on Agni, and even more on Soma, since he’s being portrayed as the series’ fool/brat; the kid has quite a bit of potential, and plenty of room for Yana to experiment. Funnily enough, I based my characterization of Soma with that opening page in mind, where he’s wearing that serious expression and looks nothing like he is seventeen and looks ~hella fine~. Soma’s evidence is intentionally shaky. While I do believe that he’s unusually perceptive (given that altercation he had with Sebastian), it would’ve been awkward to go from Foolhardy!Soma to You Want The Proof? You Can’t Handle The Proof!Soma. I had to let him babble, had to let him sort things out and chatter away ( ... )

Re: Part one! diluted_thought June 19 2010, 04:21:19 UTC

Knowing Sebastian, he was probably the editor or something, if not the guy standing over Goethe’s shoulder and giving him suggestions on how to better phrase things. (Dimitri’s probably got his porn stash in the nooks and crannies.) Thank you for calling the descriptions gorgeous. ♥ Like I said, I exploded with them when writing the second half.

Agni was the most difficult character to write for many reasons-I was doing it from his perspective, my Agni!fanon outweighs my Agni!canon (thank you, Yana), the situation at hand and the themes discussed were inarguably awkward for him, he was torn between his loyalty for Soma and his friendship with Sebastian, and Arshad got in the way. Honestly, I’m actually glad that Agni sounded off to you. He was supposed to. It’s not every day that your prince decides to become unusually perceptive, and tell you that your friend isn’t human. Agni’s not used to dealing with this sort of stuff. He’s used to smiling and being helpful and looking after his prince and apologizing profusely-not promising ( ... )